F56
2nd Marriages
February 24 2013
Comments
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Don't feel the need - love and commitment is so much more than a ring and bit of paper. My veiws on life, love and relationships have changed somewhat since the first time down that path!
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Just as likely to get married the second time as I am the first time.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
I love being married..........love it so much Ive done it three times Explanation 1st Marriage - I was 21 - it lasted not quite 4 years (lets face it what do you know at 21 ?? - there should be a law banning one from marrying under 35 !!) 2nd Marriage - 28 - lasted 8 years - sadly and regrettably this marriage could not survive the death of a child (his) we parted as friends.......... 3rd Marriage - 37 - lasted 18 hours - my husband passed away from cancer - he was my child hood love who I found approx 25 years later after we split up... Would this marriage survived had my husband. ? .we will never know...................its poignant Ok so you can see I have had unusual marriages - however I do not regret any of them....they were all good wonderful men in their own way- and they helped define me - and directed my life accordingly Im 48 now...havent been married for a long time...and I miss it.............I love the commitment of marriage.....living together is way too easy (I know Ive done it)..........there is still something uniquely beautiful about standing up publicly in front of those who you love declaring to them that the person your standing next to , is the person you choose to share the journey with - the good, the bad, and ugly.............yes I still believe...............however I am among the minority.......... Maybe one day again, maybe not.............................. apparently it has already been decided........... and in the lap of the gods.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
I no longer understand the concept ...- Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
12 years ago
I managed to raise my children just fine. Never felt the need to marry and never thought I would. However, just over 12 months ago I met a man for coffee (off a site like this). Two weeks later he asked me to marry him and I could not think of a single reason to say no. He has been married a few times before. Marriage is not about commitment, it is not about how much you love each other, nor the ceremony, dress and all the trappiungs. The reason I said yes, and he keeps getting married is for the sense of belonging.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Ofcourse, I had a lot of help destroying that relationship. My first wife had no interest in being part of my life or including me in hers. Second time around has had it's hurdles but we've overcome them because we want to be together and nothing will seperate us.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
am on our second....for both of us... My first ended amicably,in fact we still share an odd coffee... part of the joys of shared parenting with someone who was my wife, and although is no longer.... remains my 'friend'......we just grew into very different people, and recognised that we'd be happier apart...... My wife now, Shel, is someone i'd known since 1975, tho not romantically...we came together by accident, and found we both very much liked who the other had become, so we've been inseperable since we decided to journey together... she's my best friend, my lover, and my confidant, and is a breath of fresh air after the last women i was with... no lies, no manipulations, no hidden truths or secrets, just open honest love, somewhere i can finally relax and enjoy myself, free of doubt, hesitation and suspicions.... a sensational place to be at 50...exactly what i'd been dreaming of........
-
RHP User
12 years ago
If I found the right person. I like what shinas says about the beauty of standing up publicly before your friends and declaring your love. I would like the opportunity of doing that. The first time round we got married in a registry office and had 3 guests. I also agree with Handmaiden about having a sense of belonging.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Is a piece of paper, that legally excludes you from marrying the 6 others you've proposed to :p.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
even I am single since 14 years, and I had never a relationship since my husband past away. I would marry again, why?Because I had a good marriage I understand the concept I think. Its just to now I have not been with someone where both of us felt the same......so for now its just as it is.....I am a matter of fact person. You can't make someone love you. I fell in love with someone from RHP, he didn't so that's just life and you move on. However I like being with a male, and be in a couple situation. Yes it is hard work, however everything is hard work. On a marriage you have to work and in my mind communication is the key and letting the other not lose his or her identity.Compliment and lift each other up and not suffocate each other.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
the good wife gene is very much missing in me.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Unsure... They would have to be really super-dooper special for me to even go there. Most of my couple friends are in 2nd marriages and appears to work really for them... :-) Lots of heartaches along the way... Blended families are very very hard work... I walked away broken hearted from the one I was in... Have to be a "UNITED FRONT" there or it won't work. :-) Foxy- Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
12 years ago
..that 2nd marriages lasted longer on average?I understand the concept of wanting to celebrate your feelings for someone with friends. An Ex and I invented a ceremony we'd have on our anniversary each (or most) years. A sort of celebration of where we'd come from since the last one. Both of us would ask a close friend to be our witness and we'd have a dinner or party.I'm of the opinion marriage is backwards. I feel like you should do it when you've been together 35 years and you still wake up wanting get sweaty with each other before your morning coffee. Not something you do when you've only spent a few years together.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Not in a million years!!!. My ex destroyed me at 40 and the rest of my life is ruined. Why would I go through that again?
-
RHP User
12 years ago
and for me those reasons would be - for love and companionship (nothing nicer than being wrapped up in the protective arms of someone you love) - comfort knowing your partner is your rock when times are tough - to have a trusted confidant that does not judge you - someone to be open and free to be yourself with. - oh and sex on tap!!! in whatever shape or form we mutually want to experience. SFxx
-
Mr_MrsAraps
12 years ago
Its your actions that count. As for going there again I am going to be a fence sitter and say probably not to marrying again.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
the big thing in marriage is intimacy and quality control in the bedroom. Meeting randoms is so hit and miss! LOL SFxx
-
RHP User
12 years ago
After a too young first marriage......I thought NEVER again...But then I met my now husband and I realized what it all should be about and am very happily married now.I wouldnt want to imagine not being with my husband each day or not having having him in my life, we are very much enmeshed. I have actually read that the second married stats are horribly skewed, as other stats suggest that second 'long term commitments', as in defacto/common law/partner are reported to be significantly more successful and last longer with high degrees of satisfaction.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Shinas, I disagree with the fact that living together is easy. If my last relationship hadn't been completely committed, I would not have stuck it out for eight challenging years.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
was married for 14 years and whilst it was volatile, it produced 2 of the most magnificent children alive.I've been divorced for nearly 5 years and for me to say yes again, I would want the fairytale.Fortunately, I still believe in fairytales
-
RHP User
12 years ago
My first one all of 3 years, I kick her out in Marble Bar WA and then met my second wife some 2 years later and we have been married for 28 years and been together for 34 years now so got no need to re-marry I am very happy with my second wife GT
-
RHP User
12 years ago
I met my first husband when i was 20, engaged 3 weeks after we met, married 3 years later and it ended after 7 years. We shared a son and still get along and proud of being good divorced parents. My second marriage waited 3 years after we met and we had bought a house together. Shared a son together lasted 15 years, very tough life raising two son's with medical and mental issues. Such as ADHD and partial deafness in the other son.Proud to say I'm a good mum and have always been there through thick and thin even after my 2nd husband left because he couldn't handle the parenting of the oldest anymore. Also discovered he was gay recently, think his reasons for leaving wasnt the children. Doesnt really matter anyway we are trying hard to continue being good parents with the youngest one we share. My oldest tells me he loves me and thanks me for always being a support and raising him. About to embark on living by myself without my children shortly and looking forward to the future as feel its a reward to being a good parent all these years.Think a daily comittment to be with someone and work on it and appreciate it everyday is the future for me and not marriage. Keep the individual I am by looking after myself and not giving all of myself away to others as in the past. As its the individual person that attracts a partner in the first place.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Tick the box Married & Divorced... yep i was once in Love and did the whole Picket fence kids, pets and all the trimmigs. Shit happens some marriages work some dont, i dont think too much about it and i just take life as it comes. If i felt like it i would marry again But the bitch might just need a decent ladder to get over the wall i have built to keep them nasty bitches oit hahahhaha No Just kidding The Marriage Certificate to me means Fuck all, but i get that it means more to others ,however if i want to be with somone i will be and if i dont I aint simple as that. These days i do as i want and nothing else
-
RHP User
12 years ago
And others positively no. I was married for 20 years, my husband died. I thought I could not survive on my own but I did.I am extremely hedonistic, I am not sure anyone would put up with the life I have come to lead. I do what I want, when I want. Sure it would be nice to have someone permanen, sex on tap, security and all the rest, but to give up my aquired lifestyle, no I dont think so. BUT, LIFE CHANGES DOESN'T IT?
-
RHP User
12 years ago
... I never want to get married for as long as I can remember. The well and truly confirmed bachelorette. Maybe it's because I don't like white dresses ... KK xx
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Some things, I only need to experience once lol.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Im 48 now...havent been married for a long time...and I miss it.............I love the commitment of marriage.....living together is way too easy (I know Ive done it)..........there is still something uniquely beautiful about standing up publicly in front of those who you love declaring to them that the person your standing next to , is the person you choose to share the journey with - the good, the bad, and ugly.............yes I still believe...............however I am among the minority.......... I have never though of marriage in this way. Thanks for such a wonderful insight
-
Cheekyarses
12 years ago
We have been married almost 19yrs n been together for 23yrs... Would either of us get married again - we really don't know.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Nup! I don't see the point of it. I can't see myself doing it again.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Wowwow... we have the same landscaper.. no ones getting behind this lil black ducks wall - ever - again!! After my 23 years I feel I have learned all about the soaring highs and the devastating lows and worse the monogamous monotony of placid ignorance that your life really is revolving around a twin tuner pvr so you can record Ncis and criminal minds and not miss out. I enjoy my me time. I'm even enjoying heading for my local for an occasional pub meal by myself, the girls there always make me feel welcome with a bit of a chat. I miss going to the cinema, cos going by myself still is a weird thought and heading out on my own scares the shit out of me. But I I do it! and I feel a strength in me because I face my fears. I also haven't watched an episode of Ncis or criminal minds and I feel ALIVE!! My answer is no, I wouldn't remarry :)
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Ms_Devious' Shinas, I disagree with the fact that living together is easy. If my last relationship hadn't been completely committed, I would not have stuck it out for eight challenging years. Being with anyone in any type of relationship is hard work but we persevere because we love them My own experience (which naturally is my only experience) is having been married and had two significant defacto relationships that sadly ended......the ending of the defacto's was somewhat easier - (even though we still had property togeher although no kids) it was just like done dusted.....Im not saying that there is any less pain hurt mess with either of a marriage or defacto splitting...when I split from the defacto..it was just over red rover, there was no commitment or real incentive for us to work harder which appears ( I stress appears) to be the case when you are married but that was my experience Or may be it just comes down to the fact that you work harder at it when your married, cause you cant be fag in spending thousands of dollars on a half assed lawyer who is encouraging you to spend 3 grand on legal fees in wrestling from the other, that bloody Wedgewood plate that Aunty Ethel gave you for a wedding present which apparently both of you cant simply live without !!!
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'unassuming82' Im 48 now...havent been married for a long time...and I miss it.............I love the commitment of marriage.....living together is way too easy (I know Ive done it)..........there is still something uniquely beautiful about standing up publicly in front of those who you love declaring to them that the person your standing next to , is the person you choose to share the journey with - the good, the bad, and ugly.............yes I still believe...............however I am among the minority.......... I have never though of marriage in this way. Thanks for such a wonderful insight Ok I know this is about getting married again, but just wondering unassuming82, your profile say you are a 30 year old man and in this you say at the start: I'm 48 now?????? Have you been misleading us all about your age?? Ok you all have a good day play nice and be happy if you are married GT (that's all LOL)
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Ummmm, GTBI, i think you'll find unassuming was quoting Shinas??- Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
12 years ago
Yes I would if I find the right person.
-
RHP User
12 years ago
My near first marriage didn't turn into one..Couldn't imagine life with her, at all..Brrrrrr! For all I was put through during the 7 years together, the lies, the deceitfulness, I truly don't know how that woman could lye straight at night. I was so fortunate to meet my current wife, she's such a gorgeous gal. I knew she was the one to fulfil my life, such a breath of fresh air, so grounded, my best friend..Wouldn't want to journey through life without her..
-
RHP User
12 years ago
My apologies to unassuming, I should have read back a bit This is what happens when you get out of bed and get on here half asleep GT
-
inspirit
12 years ago
6 months ago I would of said NEVER.... Now I really have no idea if I would. At this time in my life, I would say just... no. I like my life as it is, uncomplicated, free and accountable to myself only. IF someone came along in the later future and really desired (not needed or wanted) to be a part of my life and I theirs with complete honesty, trust, dry sinful humour and unconditional love. Who knows... At the end of the day I do not need my love/commitment to be authorised and noted by a piece of paper or by the governments.
Boards
-
Hot Topics
Topics: 14361 Comments: 120840
-
Girls Ask
Topics: 1355 Comments: 14709
-
Guys Ask
Topics: 2425 Comments: 17234
-
Couples' Corner
Topics: 2405 Comments: 12737
-
Swingers Lifestyle
Topics: 794 Comments: 5154
-
Fetish & Fantasy
Topics: 1148 Comments: 6957
-
Hot Travel
Topics: 622 Comments: 2145
-
LGBT
Topics: 156 Comments: 1150
Forum help
-
Something related with that
-
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
-
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
-
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
-
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
Share