F50
Accepti the Perfectly Imperfect Body
November 29 2016
Comments
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mrspollux
8 years ago
Thank you for the question, Peony. It's great. And, yes, your description of your feeling towards your FWB makes total sense. I have felt similarly about lovers before. I too appreciate the beauty in imperfection, which generally means I am pretty laid back when it comes to other people's bodies. I appreciate all the signs of life, love, sadness, joy, growth, ageing and changing in other people. When it comes to my own body, obviously I am harsher... I think we all can be? So I embrace my imperfection less, but try to be more accepting. I look after my body, but I'm not perfect. I love my scars, stretch marks, wrinkles and increasing age spots... Because to me they are signs of a life lived fully and tell my story. MrsP xx
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RHP User
8 years ago
When I joined RHP I had body issues. I looked at the super sexy pics of other women on here and thought Id be lucky to get any interest. One of the first guys I met on here was a gorgeous younger guy Ill just call K. The frst time we met to play I was really nervous about getting naked. He said to me, "You have such a sexy little body" and couldnt keep his hands off me. After that I regained some confidence and felt attractive and sexy. Then I was out of work for 6 months and put on some weight. I was unhappy again. So I realised it was up to me to do something about it. I got a new job which is very physical, and I try and eat healthy food most of the time. Im losing weight and am getting back to where I was. But.....Ill never be a skinny lass, I accept that. However I like having boobs and a bum, and so does my partner. There is nothing wrong with being thin, just as there is nothing wrong with being curvy. If we are genuinely happy with out bodies we will be confident and feel attractive. With guys, If Im attracted to him as a whole then any flaws are a part of who he is and are endearing to me. Im not perfect so I dont look for perfection. My flaws? Crooked teeth, 53 year old wrinkles, wobbly tummy and lack of inner thigh space. My plus points....nice eyes ( I get told that a lot ), curves in the right places and good legs. So I have a lot to be thankful for at my mature age. I look at some of the younger ladies who complain about how they look.....you are fabulous! You will look back at yourself and realise that one day xx
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RHP User
8 years ago
I'm always looking to improve. Happy with my body would be an understatement though. I love my body. Took me a long time to get here, not just the physical, but my own body image, so I'm not apologising for that statement 😀 there is one part of my exercise program I need to increase, sex, great for the abs 😉 situps and painful exercises aren't required, plenty of sex is what I recommend 😊
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MsSuperFoxy
8 years ago
I am happy with my perfect imperfections...even the freckle above my freckle. If people can't except my body how it is, that's their issue, not mine. I had a lover who had the most beautiful scar on his left butt cheek. I used to kiss it all the time....Well, sometimes I would nibble and bite it. 😇😈 I love scars, they tell me a person's life. I love listening to each story about them. Ms Foxy
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RHP User
8 years ago
I have a guy who I'm really into, been seeing him for a long time. He leaves a little bit of hair above his pubic area and it annoys me, i want to grab a razor and shave it off lol maybe I will one day. It's alright, he's sexy enough to get away with it
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PatchworkGirl
8 years ago
Physicality isn't something that has typically attracted me - I'm far more interested in personality. If I was pressed, though, 18 months ago, to outline my preferences, I'd have gone for taller than me, clean shaven, with dark hair and eyes. Now, my love is shorter than me. He is more ginger than chocolate, with serious facial hair. He's been exercising a little more lately, in an effort to be a little healthier, and lose a little weight, but I think he's wonderful. His arms make me feel safe. His body, simultaneously strong and soft, makes me feel secure, and the presence of his body pressed against mine, or on top of me, is the most thrilling and wonderful thing I've ever felt. I adore his body, more than any that I've ever seen or touched, and it's because it's the vehicle that carries around the soul and spirit I adore. And I'll love holding it, whether he shrinks, or grows, or dyes his hair purple and gets piercings. I know that there are times he feels self conscious about himself, and I wish he could see himself through my eyes, because he's the sexiest fucking thing I've ever seen in my life. Perfection is a situational thing, I think. I know that many times I look at myself in the mirror and get frustrated at my stomach, or my thighs, or my extra chin, and it makes me feel self conscious about being naked in front of anyone. But I know he feels the same way about me as I do about him. And I have a wonderful FWB in my life who says similarly flattering and wonderful things about my curves. I may not be perfect for everyone, but I'm perfect for the people who deserve to get to hold me.
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MsJonesy
8 years ago
That was so eloquently expressed, what a joy to read. The last sentence...thank you. A beautifully worded reminder to myself (all of us actually) of the value of self worth.
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RHP User
8 years ago
But what is perfect. Small boobs are a turn on to me but I also like bigger ones. Boobs and Vulvas are so varied there is no one perfect. Cellulite? I can see some charm in that. Hairy arm pits, yum (but them I have an armpit fetish anyway). Sexual personality is more important.
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PatchworkGirl
8 years ago
Thank you, lovely lady! Now, will someone just remind me of all that when I'm feeling particularly flat and vulnerable next time? ;-) And can I just say, you have one of the most joyous smiles I've ever seen. It was such a privilege to get to hug you on Saturday night, you beautiful thing.
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RHP User
8 years ago
What Jonesy said - so beautiful to read, thank you x
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RHP User
8 years ago
Let's face it - we are bombarded with perfect bodies on a daily basis. 100 years ago so much was covered up whereas now a lot of images leave very little to the imagination. I admire a hot bod - male or female. But I'm more into who a person is as a lover than their six pack or flawless skin. And imperfections or 'flaws' are fascinating to me. Especially scars - I'm a sucker for a scars on a guy. There are physical attributes I'm into - eyes that draw me in are a must. But as PG so perfectly said the body is just a vehicle for who the person is. I find all types of bodies attractive when they come with an attractive soul and mind. And exploring a lovers body once they've hooked me with their mind is the icing on the cake. There's a delicious quote this thread reminds me of "You are the book I want to read. In Braille, cover to cover" I'm a lot more critical of myself. Since joining this site I've gained some confidence in my skin but I still have a long way to go. The guys I've been with have all worshipped my body which has made me feel good. But ultimately it's up to me to be more accepting regardless of what feedback I receive. Most of my physical imperfections I'm growing kind of fond of. I want to lose weight but from a health perspective not because of my appearance. In answer to the OP's question there would be one thing I would do to change part of myself and that's a tummy tuck. Having babies and multiple surgeries including a large uneven scar for back surgery have left that area a bit of a train wreck. I'm very self conscious of it. But the main reason is it's uncomfortable. It's a decision I would be making for me, to be more physically comfortable more so than feeling confident in showing my tummy - although that would be a nice pay off 😉
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megz85g
8 years ago
My body is far from perfect but since joining rhp and meeting up with some people has helped me to accept and believe the nice things my hubby has been telling me for years. I have gained so much more confidence, but it is always a bit daunting removing that first piece of clothing in front of a stranger. I always share a lot of pics so there is no surprises when we get down to it. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
In the flesh, we are not the sum total of our pictures. I did some yesterday, most standing on my head to defy gravity. My boobs are so perky from that angle that a nipple often gets trapped in my nose. Life, the great reckoning of the body, puts scars, wrinkles rolls of jelly and those dimples around your thighs that they tend look like the Luna landscape. I like the human form, no matter the shape, but some girls like a cuddly bear, others a streak of lean bacon , some the six pack some the keg. The perfect imperfections are soon forgotten when there is attraction and chemistry. Sometimes our ideal is just that an ideal, and then you are confronted with a person that is nothing like you thought you wanted in a physical way, but your just drawn to them because your insides see their insides and the rest is just superficial window dressing. Age is a great wake up call to us all. Enjoy your body while your able to, have that love affair with it. Admire its resilience and its ability to map your history in its form. My pictures are flattering as I can get them, but when your in bed with a guy, well he does not seem to mind at all our perfect imperfections he just wants to be with you, be it for a half hour or a half a life time. A person will be in the zone of you , one hopes ,when you get down to your birthday suits. I also have health issues, it comes with the territory of living. Not all of us are up to position 2456 of the Karma Sutra so I have to let guys know that. I can get into that position but you need a paramedic and a defibrillator and crow bar to get me out of it. The woman in the tryst
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boots_69
8 years ago
Nicely said Madam Tryst. Happy with what I was dealt body wise in life. Have never been nor never will be the pencil thin six packed poster boy. But can guarantee you will spot me in most crowds due to height. Life doesn't always treat us nice hair gone from thick black to thinning salt and pepper - some love it some don't. Take the positives and keep smiling and having fun - others will wonder what they are missing out on. Boots
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MsJonesy
8 years ago
Are we not all imperfect, a sum of chromosomes and sheer random luck of how they mixed whilst the cells were busy splitting? I know I received my father's build, what with the broad shoulders & back, a defined waist, longer torso and shorter (&wider) legs. My sister has my mother's build, finer bone structure, no waist, but her kick arse legs.. sigh. I am imperfect, but I like myself. I am not everyone's cup of tea, I am not the chick who is the dream sex goddess that everyone wants to fuck. But I don't want to be that chick, because those who like (or love) me do so because they are attracted to the whole of me...body, mind and soul...and all my imperfections.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'Summersolstice' Funny, Boots and I were talking the other day about some pics you took of a couple of us some years back. You made us all look amazing. Both of you look great these days, by the way. I could never miss you boots, your a presence in the room and not just your hight Yes I have photographed a lot of lovely people of RHP and all without exception have been a delightful bunch And summer you are just as beautiful inside and out from the day I first met you. The woman in the tryst, or Lady Tuscan
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RHP User
8 years ago
I'm pretty harsh on myself and I know this, it's something I'm working on and I've improved but still depends on my mindset at the time and what's going on in my life. The one thing I would most like to change about my body isn't something I can actually change (I would love to be taller, hate being short and the way it influences how people treat you), so I just have to learn to live with it. Would also like bigger boobs, but that doesn't bother me enough that I'd get implants. Same with my nose which I'm not too fond of, it's not a big enough deal to me to get surgery. I've also always disliked my saddlebags and my thighs in general, but that's partly genetic and just how I am being a pear shape. I've generally always been fairly active but recently I have started going to the gym in an effort to address both physical and mental health, and the bit of toning up that comes with that is an added bonus. As for strict deal breakers when it comes to FWBs / partners, I can't think of too many. Being overweight would be one, since the physical attraction wouldn't be there for me. Other than that it would probably just go on an individual basis, there no doubt would be things that I can't think of at the moment. I'm actually not attracted to the really muscled, chiselled look, but I'm not sure if it would be a deal breaker as I've not had any first hand experience with anyone like that (have had partners who were athletic but not that really sculpted look).
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RHP User
8 years ago
Being the person everyone wants to fuck would get really tiresome. Really fast.
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lovman8
8 years ago
intelligent, funny positive fiesty and just a bit naughty (or what ever combination of the things causes "chemistry" ) then it seems to follow that I will find her body sexy what ever the shape!
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PatchworkGirl
8 years ago
This thread has been ruminating in my head over the past few days. I've recent weeks I've been trying to be more accepting of how I look, so I've been consciously taking photos of myself each day, and looking at myself, being ok with what I see in the mirror, or on the screen. Today, I was listening to some Tim Minchin on Spotify, and his song Perfect came on. The last couple of verses really resonated. This is my body And I live in it It's thirty-one and six months old It's changed a lot since it was new It's done stuff it wasn't built to do I often try to fill it up with wine And the weirdest thing about it is I spend so much time hating it But it never says a bad word about me This is my body And it's fine It's where I spend a vast majority of my time It's not perfect, but it's mine This is my brain And I live in it It's made of love and bad song lyrics It's tucked away behind my eyes Where all my screwed up thoughts can hide Cause God forbid I hurt somebody And the weird thing about a mind Is that every answer that I find Is the basis of a brand new cliche This is my brain And it's fine It's where I spend a vast majority of my time It's not perfect, but it's mine It's not perfect, but it's mine It's not perfect I'm not quite sure I've worked out how to work it It's not perfect, but it's mine But it's mine
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PurePeony
8 years ago
...to read everyone's replies and learn that we are all continuing to grow in self-acceptance and self-love. I was very self conscious when I first appeared here. Gradually, I learnt that in general, the men I've played with are too gleeful to get some action to bother about my imperfect bits. LOL! I used to try and hide them and sometimes even apologise for them. However, I quickly realized that they had never noticed them until I drew their attention to it and/or they have noticed but it was so insignificant to them in the grand earth-shaking scheme of things. :P I so love men - they are either very sweet, tactful and charming (because they wanna get some), or all that bloodflow gets drawn to the nether regions and nothing else matters besides getting the appetite appeased (by getting some)! LOL! Simple and uncomplicated! Well... most men are anyway. I'm lucky to be aquainted with many Dr friends, a few of them are actually Plastic Surgeons. When I asked about my "fat pads" that never disappeared despite me losing 15-17 kgs, I was given the same answer : it's all in the genes. Even a few of the very fit folks who work out everyday have encountered similar issues whereby the only solution is spot liposculpture. If one thought that clingy FB's are hard to get rid of, these genetically predisposed fat pads are tough mudderf's! :P I have come across people who are unfortunately plaqued by Body Dysmorphic Disorders and it's really sad to watch them torment themselves and get stuck in a deep pit where they can never see how beautiful and attractive other people see them. Instead, they view their bodies with so much hate and self-loathing that they doggedly pursue all sorts of methods and procedures in an obsessive compulsion to look good. The scars of self-harm a few of them bear are very disturbing and very heartbreaking. They are tormented souls who can never love themselves and never allow the beauty within to radiate until they manage to peel those blinders off. One can only wish that they will learn to love themselves ...and soon. So, in the grand scheme of things, I have slowly learnt to appreciate my body, imperfections and all. I have weathered so many health issues in recent years and yet, my body has been resilient and hardly bears signs of the ravages. When I hear clients express surprise at my age because I apparently look much younger than I am, I have learnt to be thankful and grateful instead of thinking that everyone is lying. :P Same situation, but a more positive response these days. :) Sometimes, we have lessons to learn. Whether you believe in God or the Universe, etc often, these lessons will keep on repeating themselves until we learn what we are meant to learn. My trigger was when I kept hearing different people say the same thing to me, "You are too harsh on yourself!". Another light bulb moment was when I was telling a friend how I'd go for Liposuction if I ever won Tattslotto big time and she of the massive wrinkly face and sun-ravaged skin confidently declared that even though she ought to get Botox'd and skin rejuvenation stuff, she really doesn't give a damn about it enough to really bother. Such confidence! Acceptance of our imperfections is a journey for all of us. A few of us are already at the peak of the mountain. A few are getting there in various stages, others are still lingering at the valleys. Physical Imperfections do not define us totally, but they can be a challenge on the path to self-love. I'll never stop working hard to improve on my imperfect bits...within reason, but it shall be because I love myself enough to want to look even better and not because I hate myself so much I want to get rid of whatever looks disgusting. Same goal but with more positivity! I wish everyone well on your respective journeys! ;)
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