F35
All the single ladies....
May 31 2015
Comments
-
inspirit
10 years ago
Happens all too often. IMO. 4 1/2 years and seen it all. Watch out for the rumours - they're amazing!
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Some people at functions are like the seagulls in Finding Nemo... Mine! .................................................... Mine! .................. Mine! .................................................................................................................... Mine! ........... Mine!................................................. Mine!
-
RHP User
10 years ago
They'll see you in the corner of their eye, if you are new, you'll get the cold shoulder treatment and death stares all night! because: a) they want all the attention for themselves ; and b) everyone wants to play with the new girl; and c) jealousy; and d) new girl can squirt and they can't i know i'm not a singly lady, but just throwing it out there.....
-
RHP User
10 years ago
are generally frequented by some of the most self obsessed and self interested people I have ever met. Your observations are valid.
-
Lovinit28andKC72
10 years ago
I don't think I'm like that, I like people until they piss me off, regardless of their status...... But I have seen a few married women hating a single women, vice versa and single girls hating on single girls....I think its a competition thing with some women, I just go off and do who and what I want. I watched the look of horror on 3 women's faces when I first attended a day time play party for the first time, they looked me up and down, frowned with disapproval and whispered in each other's ears..... I just smiled sweety as I wondered into the open playroom, where all the action was happening, I do like to watch after all.....💋
-
TallBaldSexy
10 years ago
Well haven't noticed paid too much attention to inter lady communication but(t) grasp your concept. My initial thought would be - embarrassment Being a newish face I'd imagine they may be Embarrassed in case of being identified - maybe- the older hands couldn't give a shit.... Agree though I see the expressions and apprehension on new faces at similar events...guys in same position either get way too pissed to hide their insecurities or simply do not turn up after they have RSVPd.... KIS the phenomenon makes it easier for the normal folk - whoever they may be 😎😎😎😎
-
TallBaldSexy
10 years ago
For a birthday soon..... 1yr in RHP ......oh dear 😱😱😱😱😱😱
-
RHP User
10 years ago
We don't like people who aren't team players!
-
RHP User
10 years ago
When I was new I found it hard to approach other women...I think it just reflected my anxiousness, but once I developed some confidence and chatted with the girls they opened up and chatted back, at times with relief as they feel the same way! Now I make a point of welcoming the newbies, or the person/people standing in the corner on their own, as I was once there...and it's terrifying!
-
RHP User
10 years ago
not been clear.... I'm talking about the attitudes of the old timers to the new faces.... I have been snubbed more than once as a newbie trying to be friendly with the women who are regulars in the scene.
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Lovinit28' I don't think I'm like that, I like people until they piss me off, regardless of their status...... But I have seen a few married women hating a single women, vice versa and single girls hating on single girls....I think its a competition thing with some women, I just go off and do who and what I want. I watched the look of horror on 3 women's faces when I first attended a day time play party for the first time, they looked me up and down, frowned with disapproval and whispered in each other's ears..... I just smiled sweety as I wondered into the open playroom, where all the action was happening, I do like to watch after all.....💋 The first time we met, you wrapped me up in a huge hug and told me I have great tits..... You can't get more welcoming than that!
-
AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
Been years since my group activities but can relate. The women welcomed me but the guys were like that. They got their macho front on and didnt go near me......until they found me down the back rooms out of the way. Where they admitted they didn't want anyone to know they might be bi. Including their wives.......and then they were all over me.
-
RHP User
10 years ago
I found that being a new single woman at a party does have the regular women fluffing their feathers.( not sure if married men feel the same about single guys, they dont show their reactions on their face or use body language like we women do) Married women instantly look at their husband to guage their reaction to the single woman who has walked in. Im a fairly social person and even if Im nervous in any type of gathering, I will always break the ice and introduce myself to everyone. Party or club wise, I have never been to one on my own, I have either attended with a couple or a fb or mate,but still have the " new meat single woman" reaction on occasion.I even had a comment said out loud as I was walking past another single lady who I was told that she was a regular attendee of this particular venue ,"well I wont get all the action tonight", and laughed. But once they see that you arent going to jump every bloke that approaches you, they lighten up and relax. But yeah, I think swingers clubs and parties are more for couples so I dont have any interest now. But the elusive all bi parties have a totally different dynamics and the attendees seem to be a lot more secure and non judgemental with newbies and singles in my limited experience.
-
Kinkylisette
10 years ago
Hahaha I'm keen as to get into this swingers thing hopefully you women can show some friendliness towards me if not I'll just brush up on ya till ya notice me :-)
-
Lovinit28andKC72
10 years ago
Well you do have great tits.....😇 oh and I love hugs....
-
RHP User
10 years ago
it's stories like yours and the OP's that do turn me off places like swingers clubs and parties of similar ilk. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
10 years ago
It's a primal remnant..group sex is a very primal thing to engage in..and even if it's not group sex at those events the primary purpose is sex..humans can be very territorial,not always keen to share me thinks xxFreya
-
Hottie1
10 years ago
It's the playground for finding a potential playmate. We are all vulnerable when we put ourselves out there, that vulnerability is increased in situations when you may feel out of your depth or exposed in some way. As a married woman, I don't have issues of jealousy where hubby is concerned, in fact I love it when he flirts up a storm. I've also gone to events on my own and yes I've experienced that sort of behaviour from women, I just put a smile on my face and pretend like it doesn't bother me. I've had women be openly vitriolic towards me, one even saying her husband was banned from coming near me 😊 I am fully aware (and as stated above) the new girl is going to get the attention. I'm also aware that there are cliques and breaking into those is quite challenging for newbies. My tips for social meets is dress to impress, have a killer attitude and work the room. Leave them in awe! Mary xx
-
RHP User
10 years ago
An interesting insight for the women I never thought it would be like that. My question is for the single guys going to clubs. I would imagine it be difficult for single guys attending swingers clubs, what's everyone experiences? - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
10 years ago
clubs with club rules and club locals that run the club own the club and says who can be in the club so if tou wanna be in the club you gotta do what the club expects you to do ! Suck up there ass ! - Posted from rhpmobile
-
Seachange
10 years ago
I am not like that KIS. but then again, I have not been in any swinging parties at all (how do you get an invite?) only meet and greets, so can't tell... I will take your word for it. It may be jealousy or envious, queen bee syndrome. some women can be territorial. I remember going to couples club in sydney, wiht a 'date'. the men were trying to be really friendly with me but some of the 'wives' were giving me the death stare. Made me wary of the men and moved on very quickly as there are more men to meet in the club than you can poke a stick at. Anyway, we should hit the trail together, single women and be each other's wingchicks in these swingers' parties. lol.
-
RHP User
10 years ago
"Single women tend to be generally unfriendly to other single women, particularly new faces to the scene" this is what happens when a commodity (single men) become scarce in an economy..it is normal.. let's face it is human nature - and we women are the prime example of that. Every social meet I have been to - as a single woman- I know that other women were checking me out - assessing how much of a threat I am to their goals and objectives of securing the "commodity" -the men they had set eyes upon.. Nothing wrong with that - I do the same ..I am a woman :)
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Fit73' are generally frequented by some of the most self obsessed and self interested people I have ever met. Your observations are valid. Cynical much????
-
him_and_me
10 years ago
Hi KIS, Do you feel it was blatantly obvious that they weren't being unfriendly or unwelcoming? I at times feel very self conscious at meets (for various reasons) and kind of go into my shell. I suspect at these times I project an image that appears unfriendly...but it is by no means meant to be. Just wondering if that is a similar thing with single women. Him - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'him_and_me' Hi KIS, Do you feel it was blatantly obvious that they weren't being unfriendly or unwelcoming? I at times feel very self conscious at meets (for various reasons) and kind of go into my shell. I suspect at these times I project an image that appears unfriendly...but it is by no means meant to be. Just wondering if that is a similar thing with single women. Him - Posted from rhpmobile But these particular women had no issues being outgoing and friendly to others, so I don't think that's a consideration here. I'm talking about me making an effort, being complimentary, smiling and making eye contact, trying to engage and being ignored. They were not socially awkward, they were rude. I have no problems at all in social situations, I am happy to arrive on my own and I always end up making friends so I'm not looking for a pity-party. I still have a fantastic time, but I do get tired of the competitive thing that some women do. Surely we're all on the same side here?
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'lilyorchid' I am not like that KIS. but then again, I have not been in any swinging parties at all (how do you get an invite?) only meet and greets, so can't tell... I will take your word for it. ...... Anyway, we should hit the trail together, single women and be each other's wingchicks in these swingers' parties. lol. As to how you get an invite... If you're a reasonably attractive single woman darling, you just ask!
-
RHP User
10 years ago
When I was in Melbourne I got invited to a select party that was all couples. After getting very lost, stuck in traffic and illegally parked, lets just say when I walked in the door I was not my usual exuberant self! But I still put on a smile and introduced myself around, and got met with some interesting looks(read, unfriendly)....but the killer was one chick(the hottest looking) ask me why I was there! She just didn't get that a single girl would want to be a swinger, or at a couples party....and she was rather hostile. After an in depth convo(and boy did she grill me!) she sauntered off then sicked her husband on me....to tell me she "picked" me for the night! Reckon I played with them?? Get the f##k over yourself!
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Should be more single's only nights at clubs.
-
inspirit
10 years ago
Argh the memories of the wives sussing out a suitable partner for their hubby's. I was lucky and went to my first swingers party with a well experienced couple. I was also to meet other couples I had chatted to in the chat rooms. I did have a fun night, however there was the usual 'look up and down" and i did feel somewhat intimidated in the first few hours. I really had no idea of the expectations nor protocol. I remember being "followed" around by a couple of the married men which made me feel quite uncomfortable. (This is not s usual scenario) I have too admit closed couples parties are not my thing anymore. Much prefer a club or in the least a swingers party where there are equal singles (male and female) to couples.
-
Bazingal
10 years ago
They all tend to stick to the same people, rarely branching out. Especially couples that are familiar with other couples. My idea of a meet and greet is to broaden your circle not enclose it. I try to chat to as many new people as possible. But each to their own, I can't change an other's approach (or lack there of).
-
RHP User
10 years ago
KIS At the last meet a married lady friend of mine was in the bathroom. She noticed another lady with the fluro bracelet on and said oh hi your at the RHP meet too. Apparently she looked her up and down and walked out without saying anything at all. Same night her and I in the bathroom again as you know once you go you cant stop lol. We both smiled at another lady while we were scrounging for lipstick. She was oh hi your at the RHP event too and came skipping over to chat and to apply lippy in the mirror together. So not sure if its a single or a married lady thing just some women arent friendly and some are. I do try and talk to a few new people each time but always find myself going back to the group of friends Im closest too. However I would never brush anyone off if there to smile or say hi to me.
-
Seachange
10 years ago
meet and greets may be different from swingers parties. I find Meets are more social in nature than sexual. I have been to three meet and greets in Melbourne and have found it really friendly., I am a single woman and would walk into the roomful of people on my own. I always say hello to people and of course, need a bit of dutch courage before mingling. Thanks to my friends, misters G & T.n Just the one though, my limit for the night. I do find that people who know each other , whether via Chat or other previous comm, navigate to each other and form a circle of safety. To me, that is natural. some people are shy and take time to limber up before working the room. I do mingle, work the room, introduce myself to people, single men or women or couples. I have a ready smile and a joke or two up my sleeve (well metaphorically) to break the ice. I find that if they laugh, they tend to open up more. Pressure is off. so when I get to perth for your Meet and Greet, get set for a silly joke from me. I'll hang with you and we can be each other's wingchicks.. lol
-
inspirit
10 years ago
Hopefully notice will be taken :-) - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Single men are a scarce commodity? Well I suppose at the traditional swingers clubs and events, also all the wifey's have the husbands balls in their purse as well. I don't like couples and single lady events much and wouldn't bother going on my own. Seriously, why would I want their pussy whipped husbands anyway!! :P
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Can't say I have ever noticed unfriendly women at events. I must be one of them! Lol.
-
On_Safari
10 years ago
I've seen people rubbished by others and garner their assistance to take someone down either upfront or usually more behind the scenes type malicious gossip. Those people then walk away because of other people's fakery, gullibility and/or insecurities!! It's none of our business what other people really think of us. Their behaviour on the other hand demonstrates if they are in fact friend, foe or people tou want to include in your life and that saving grace equips us with the ability to choose to put up with their bullshit and pity the rest of the people who buy into it. Sheep I think they're referred as. Or as my old mate Kate used to say "Not everyone's going to like you, some people are just assholes." and accept that fact. Lol it's not me it's you. Mob mentality, cliques, BFF's gone wrong whatever the case may be it's not always as it appears. Some might question the motivations of these people at parties and gatherings but most will buy whatever story/consensus is being spun without question. Maybe people could go more based on their own interactions or just step out of their comfort zone and welcome the strangers in. Viewing someone as competition is a weak excuse to ostracise them, make them feel uncomfortable or diminish their self-esteem. Women are bad for it but I've seen the men here and in the workplace to it to others as well. Perhaps it's human nature to have contempt for the people you percieve as having or being something you feel in yourself you aren't?
-
RHP User
10 years ago
And I've felt some stares , I couldn't tell you what the stares meant as I was to self conscious or nervous at the time .... I've been lucky enough to meet some wonderful ladies single and married in my only two meets. I was also lucky enough to have the support of a male friend who had been around for a little while , so I can imagine how daunting it would have been for me had he not been there. It would be great to maybe see a buddy system set up for the social events , if your a newbie , when you rsvp maybe you could be attached to a regular single who could chat to you prior , meet you at the venue and be a guide. A single lady with a single lady . May help with some of the issues you describe KIS. Maybe name badges as well !!! Lol
-
RHP User
10 years ago
I'm not talking about social meet and greets. I find them to be a different animal altogether. I'm talking about parties and clubs where the purpose is for everyone to get down and dirty...
-
RHP User
10 years ago
It's the insecure women that do that... They are not so sure of their husbands/partners. In my opinion. I am not sure if single women do it? Why bother fighting over a married dude? I don't go to swingers clubs regularly enough to notice regulars, I suppose the difference is that I never go on my own anyway.
-
On_Safari
10 years ago
Social M&G's are kind of like that. If the hosts know you're a new attendee they would offer you some assurance and more than likely a trustworthy hand to introduce you to a few people. I know that's what I do but ultimately it is up to you to mingle (broad smile) social meet and greets are exactly that....social no pressure and safe but if you happen to meet someone or a few then lucky you!! Lol nametags are a whole other story, cause for giggles and sometimes not so useful. Welcome to the forum 👍 and yes Meeka who wants to squabble over a married man or woman, have heard it happen more between married couples as opposed to singles ~ Indy
-
AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
is so true. The recent melb m&g was my first social occasion as Annie for over 20 years( looooong story). Arriving by myself i was hyperventilated. But in no time they looked after me so well, steered me around a few times to meet different people. It was so good.
-
On_Safari
10 years ago
You were a ST🌟R both nights. Honestly you're an hot bloke and a sexy lady. You have it all rolled into one :)
-
RHP User
10 years ago
But I rise above it! I have no interest in competing with anyone and will be friendly to all souls. My motto is be yourself, what people think of you is none of your business! - Posted from rhpmobile
-
AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
Your hot self. Oohh la lah!
-
chevtrek
10 years ago
The girls tell me that even with me they get competitive somaybe the ladies need to relax more. Quoting 'want_this_hmm' They'll see you in the corner of their eye, if you are new, you'll get the cold shoulder treatment and death stares all night! because: a) they want all the attention for themselves ; and b) everyone wants to play with the new girl; and c) jealousy; and d) new girl can squirt and they can't i know i'm not a singly lady, but just throwing it out there.....
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Everytime I've attended swingers parties or hosted I get the cold shoulder from most of the women there. It is also an intimidation factor, if you're a pretty chick other women see you as competition. I'm built like an Amazon so I'm physically intimidating for most people, including men. Luckily I'm very friendly and comforting so I can fit in quite easily. I either take other females with me or I take a guy to kind of ease into the frostiness. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
Cassy_74
10 years ago
I am now singing to myself " oh ooo oh oh ooo oh oooo oooo all the single ladies" lol But I hear what you are saying, I talk to anyone unless I am out of spirits but then I tend to stay home if not in a social mood. But I have been looked up and down and snubbed on occasion, I just laugh it off and walk away and talk to some random stranger who is wondering who the fuck I am lol!!
-
Chelle63
10 years ago
Quoting 'Keepitsimple72' not been clear.... I'm talking about the attitudes of the old timers to the new faces.... I have been snubbed more than once as a newbie trying to be friendly with the women who are regulars in the scene. My housemate and I have had a few parties now and as 2 single ladies we try to encourage other single ladies to come too and we try to get an even mix of single males to single females, with a few couples thrown into the mix as well. When we were organising one of our first parties I put up a post on the forum about singles parties and got my butt kicked by all the "old timers" on RHP. They were very happy to lecture me on the pro's and cons of singles versus couples.This is the first time I have been back on the forum since then.
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Having never been to any of these events....yet I can't say. However women in general can be mean, jealous and ultra competitive. Personally there's nothing better than welcoming someone new and making them feel welcome. I have met a lot of women who, like me, accept each other. Hence why we are friends. Wish we were all like that. So hold your head up high and smile, they'll wonder what your thinking....... - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
10 years ago
You've turned me off attending a function... what a pity I would have been interested in checking one out.I hate the competition stuff... its so pointless. Good on you though for still having fun
-
RHP User
10 years ago
My situation, 1/2 of a swinging couple in an open relationship. When overseas alone, I go to clubs and parties alone. Some nights I find it terribly isolating, as couples really do seem, on the whole to be seeking other couples. Perhaps there is a little eying off between the single ladies but I've never felt it was malicious- more as others have said assessing the competition. Swinging on the whole, is like roulette, you never know where your ball will fall, if it will be a good night or crap. But even bad you need to be open to learning from it. Personally I think more parties and clubs should let single guys in, couples want them too. What I did last night, and apart from club nights in foreign language countries where it's fun to turn up as the exotic Australian, I brought bait. Found myself a hot, handsome wingman who wouldn't have gotten in without me, split the bill, but if it was free for single ladies I would have asked him to pay the full cheaper-than-a-singleguy price. We had a ball, all the women wanted him, and actually we clicked and played together lots 1 on 1, because he was an Awesome Single Guy. He left with lots of usernames, couples and girls, because we happily let everyone know he was a free agent. Of course in an ideal world, a unicorn would walk into a club or party and have everyone fall over them, the unicorn would hold all the power that we perceive them to have because of the skewed rhp online world, but in real life the dynamics are different. So use the magical unicorn power to attract single guys to change the real life dynamic... You just have to hunt down the good guys. Worked wonders for me.
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Totally agree here, you need to grow some balls! You can't expect everyone to just warm to you and like you at a swingers club! If you did think that you would be very prudish! You have to expect some couples are not going to welcome you or talk to you or play with you for that matter! You can't do anything about, just accept it!
-
RHP User
10 years ago
And you are now a woman?..honey unless you are thinking of changing your gender how can you even comment on something so far away from your experience ...interesting that you think balls are required.
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Freya79' And you are now a woman?..honey unless you are thinking of changing your gender how can you even comment on something so far away from your experience ...interesting that you think balls are required. Do i have a dress on? NO!This is not far from my experiences, you don't have to be Einstein to understand the dynamics of human beings when placed in any environment.If that is beyond your capacity, i'll just leave that there and make a cup of tea! Toddles
-
chevtrek
10 years ago
Most events I have been to have a few single guys so even ifyou are a single lady there should be somebody to hook up with.Also not all couples tend to ignore single ladies just the snobones who feel special or a threatened
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'ScarletParadis' My situation, 1/2 of a swinging couple in an open relationship. When overseas alone, I go to clubs and parties alone. Some nights I find it terribly isolating, as couples really do seem, on the whole to be seeking other couples. Perhaps there is a little eying off between the single ladies but I've never felt it was malicious- more as others have said assessing the competition. Swinging on the whole, is like roulette, you never know where your ball will fall, if it will be a good night or crap. But even bad you need to be open to learning from it. Personally I think more parties and clubs should let single guys in, couples want them too. What I did last night, and apart from club nights in foreign language countries where it's fun to turn up as the exotic Australian, I brought bait. Found myself a hot, handsome wingman who wouldn't have gotten in without me, split the bill, but if it was free for single ladies I would have asked him to pay the full cheaper-than-a-singleguy price. We had a ball, all the women wanted him, and actually we clicked and played together lots 1 on 1, because he was an Awesome Single Guy. He left with lots of usernames, couples and girls, because we happily let everyone know he was a free agent. Of course in an ideal world, a unicorn would walk into a club or party and have everyone fall over them, the unicorn would hold all the power that we perceive them to have because of the skewed rhp online world, but in real life the dynamics are different. So use the magical unicorn power to attract single guys to change the real life dynamic... You just have to hunt down the good guys. Worked wonders for me. My little feminist heart is shrieking at the suggestion that I fix an issue between women by "finding a hot, handsome wingman." I have a couple of guys in my life who I could take if I wanted to go as a couple, but I usually don't. Also, if a single woman decides she only wants to be friendly with me because she likes my man-bag... Well, I'm not particularly interested in getting to know her anyway. Oh and I don't have any issue with couples and generally meet some lovely ones when I go to these events. I tend to be enough of an attraction on my own to them.
-
RHP User
10 years ago
i guess my thing I'm used to having a wingman (my husband), more than the single girls I've found it's been the female half of couples giving me the cold shoulder when I'm out solo... Once they've learnt I've got no cock, I mean boyfriend, there...
-
RHP User
10 years ago
My capacity to recognise a total lack of social intelligence..something Einstein lacked as well.
-
RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Freya79' My capacity to recognise a total lack of social intelligence..something Einstein lacked as well. Interesting reply Freya, but that reply is sort of contradicting your original argument? Your original arugment:"Want _thisAnd you are now a woman?..honey unless you are thinking of changing your gender how can you even comment on something so far away from your experience ...interesting that you think balls are required."
-
Enjoylifealways
9 years ago
Wow u can't believe you had repeat yourself over and over before people got what you are saying and then they turned around to attack you . I am really over how women treat each other why can't we all just love ourselves and have some fun sharing . If women loved themselves and felt comfortable in their skin they wouldn't feel this threatened .
Boards
-
Hot Topics
Topics: 14361 Comments: 120840
-
Girls Ask
Topics: 1355 Comments: 14709
-
Guys Ask
Topics: 2425 Comments: 17234
-
Couples' Corner
Topics: 2405 Comments: 12737
-
Swingers Lifestyle
Topics: 794 Comments: 5154
-
Fetish & Fantasy
Topics: 1148 Comments: 6957
-
Hot Travel
Topics: 622 Comments: 2145
-
LGBT
Topics: 156 Comments: 1150
Forum help
-
Something related with that
-
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
-
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
-
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
-
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
Share