F56
BDSM Views
September 15 2012
Comments
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RHP User
12 years ago
Some rope and a feather duster but never got around to using them.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Personally i never have taken part in anything close to BDSM just my fluffy hand cuffs and maybe a blind fold But its something that i would like to try but i suppose its all aboit finding the right dom and someone that you can trust to have total control over you
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RHP User
12 years ago
As many regular forum readers and contributors over the years would know I am a sexual submissive (sorry to those looking for one such as myself in the bedroom but I already have a Master and Im not looking for another) and have (and do) indulge in various aspects of the BDSM lifestyle. I think when a question like this comes up people automatically think the pain aspect of the experience and not other parts of the whole lifestyle / sexual experience. There is so much more to this than meets the eye. Not all of it is about pain, there is the mental bondage, the pushing of ones boundaries and please lets not forget humiliation and degradation too, just to name a couple of aspects. I have met many people on here that also like to explore these parts of their sexuality and I have also met those who it either scares the living beejebus out of (Im allowed to make up words its my answer after all lol) or it does absolutely nothing for them. For some its not about the sexual but more about that gving of one self to another for total control (in my case please remember I am a submissive and can not speak on the behalf of someone who is dominant). In my case I enjoy BDSM in both a sexual and nonsexual way. I have explored this aspect of myself for the last 10 years and still find my boundaries being pushed by my Master but I trust him implicitly and know he wouldnt do anything with or too me that would result in my being harmed. Kisses Focus
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RHP User
12 years ago
wiccan, Like most people involved in bdsm, some even claiming to 'live the lifestyle', your emphasis is all wrong. Like most, your focus is purely on the physsical; pain for pain sake. I have been involved in bdsm for twenty years and have had live in and part time submissives. I stay away from the scene and the few times I attended bdsm gatherings, I found some of it totally cmical and some pathetic and disgusting. The focus was totally on inflicting pain, degradation, humiliation, public use and exchange of submissives. Most of the socalled doms were weak vanilla freaks masquerading as Doms to dupe gullible woman with whom they would normally have no chance of having any sexual contact. If you are really interested in delving into bdsm, study the subject. Learn what it takes to make a connection with your sugbmissive or Dominant. Pure Bdsm is as much, or even more so, a spiritual connection than physical or sexual, without which the physical and sexual aspects of the relationship are unfulfilling. I expect a backlash here, but I really dont give a damn and dont intend to revisit this place. Good luck.
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Maybetheone
12 years ago
For myself as a Dom I would have to agree with Lost_FocusCommunication and Trust is paramount. Lifestyle is 'not' all whips and chains etc. Many I have spoken too have this idea from others they have spoken to or played with. This actually pisses me off as the so called Dom/Domme is not being understanding towards His/her sub, meaning you need to get is the mind before you can stimulate the body.Yes a lot will play with a the fluffy handcuffs and blindfolds etc. Thats great to bring some spice into the bedroom :) and hopefully will heighten each others feeling towards that play. I would just call that Kink and not BDSM/Lifestyle. Lifestyle is just that: meaning it incorporates All the basics of a true relationship and actually acts on All.Truth, Trust, Communication, Respect, Empathy and Understanding.Get to know who you Really are whether it be Dom/Domme switch or sub. Once you know who you are then you can find and start to explore with the partner that best suits you.As said above, its Not all about the bedroom and can compliment your everyday life in home, work and in the social scene as you are more aware of yourself and who you are which in turn brings confidence and contentment :)Take things at your own pace and find someone that Really Understands what Lifestyle/BDSM is, so He/she can talk with you. They will know pretty much straight away know who you are and can guide/help you in any way. There is a big difference between Dominant and domineering ;)Play safe CC
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RHP User
12 years ago
Haven't now for a long time, though, just a passing phase I suspect. Cheers Felonious
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'feloniusfossil' Haven't now for a long time, though, just a passing phase I suspect. Cheers Felonious Kisses Focus
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Cheekyarses
12 years ago
We have touched on this briefly, blindfolding, spanking & hair pulling... I don't think I could participate in full bdsm - but each to their own
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RHP User
12 years ago
I quite often indulge in a little BDSM as a submissive. I have a dom who I see somewhat regularly. For us it's very psychological. I like knowing that he has total control over me, but at the same time I have complete trust in him and know that he would never hurt me. For him it's about having control over me and wanting to push my boundaries. It doesn't always involve me being tied up, it could be as simple as him telling me that if I move against his will he will punish me. We indulge in what we call 'pleasurable pain', things like nipple clamps and spanking for example. For him though it's just as much about giving me pleasure. He loves nothing more than tying me up and using toys on me for hours on end (he has a great imagination!) all the time knowing that as much as he has total control over what happens, I'm enjoying myself just as much as he is. We do draw the line though at anything that is degrading or humiliating.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Shared hair pulling , spanking and blindfolds ar all part of a normal fun filled sex life aren't they? There must be much more to BDSM.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I can honestly say being a dom or sub doesn't appeal to me I have been to an "event" that did show me some of the "lifestyle" and how people interact in this sort of situation. I think its up to you how far you go witht this and it IS a trust experience for the sub. You need to find out if you are dom or sub and then decide what limit you wish to push.. Good luck with this Mike
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RHP User
12 years ago
Some one who I can hand my trust to. Most Ive chatted to thinks its about inflicting pain on me or abusing me. It will take a lot to earn my trust but the rewards can be great for both of us. Its a very mental thing, thats where I get my fullfillment.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Hi! Thanks for your Post I agree entirely especially about some meets they have been monopolized by Egotistical Bullies who like nothing but to take a Submissive pushing his face into the table and brutilizing him to let all there look up to him on his ego trip and Recognize Him as a Dom...I have no time for such People they don't like themselves so they treat others Badly so they can feel better about who they are ..That's not being a Dom in My mind... Best wishes Attracting and enjoying those fortunate Submissives who cross your Path I know you will be 1 with them...Bye Lu :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
i have been a Dom now for many years, i agree about having a connection between said people involved. but i also noticed every body seems to think that BDSM is only about PAIN. how wrong you all are.sure some people may like a little pain, but i've found that pain is about 10% of what the scene is all about. imagine what you could do with some light rope some sex toys your own voice and your finger tips, to name but a few. if a person is lightley tied spread eagled to a bed, blindfolded it is amazing what they imagine when you use your voice softley,then or/ and your fingertips. to that you add the tip of your tongue, even whipped cream and or strawberries. no one can tell me that is painfull . remember that is only the start. also i look upon the human form as a canvas and i am the artist. once you have gained the trust it's wonderful what the imagination can dream up. thats just a little of what you can do. don't get me wrong, if someone wanted PAIN, i can handle that to, light or heavy. so don't be fooled if someone tells you it's all about pain, they dont belong in the scene. if you can not follow the different avenues that people want to take in this scene you should not call yourself a Dom. i hope this sheds a bit more light on things for those who are curious.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Hi! Wiccan-Beltane Thanks once again for your Topic:) I've never had any BDSM experience other than watching Gay BDSM Porn ..he!he! .. Like Pleasuremoments and Bellator35 have said there has to be an underlying Spiritual Connection involved Trust ,and a respect of their Boundaries how far you can take it so both enjoy their respective Positions be it the Dominant or Submissive 1.. I Have been a Pleasure Domme at times .. We have those requirtements a strong Spiritual Connection respect of boundaries tho they are tested ..Trust.. I began with commanding them to strip drop to the floor spread their legs head right down bum up so I may check out their Male Genitalia sometimes a little firmly so he reacts..Then he's commanded to stand I see his reaction in his erection I then lead him to My Bedroom..where he drops to the floor once more we continue from there .. I have used Bondage with chains , wrist ankle shakles to bring him to the most Submissive humilliating Position I can think of... Whipping, biting hot wax on his genitals , Pins slid under the top layer of skin ..Mild Humiliation ie He is Nothing... his only Purpose in Life is to Please and Pleasure me ..To Smell the scent of his Mistress to pleasure me until I say stop ..Be called Pussy Slut..To only talk when I allow it always Yes Mistress ..unless otherwise required then No Mistress.. take Cock in the form of Veg. or Vibrator to ready him for a Bi MM or MMM encounter to please me as I watch and control what's done... This particular Sub/D was a cross dresser too which added to the fun because he had absolutely no idea of dress sense.. It took all My focus to stop from giggling when I saw his outfit he was so proud of!! I continued as his Domme Berated him but at the end of the inspection etc I just couldn't refrain from giggling he duid too seeing how Pathetic his look was he even said it when I aske why he was giggling too he!he1 ..He did move on and Found a Mistress that suited his requirements to do Housework serve etc too.. he!he! .. An Interesting thing Happend twice with Former Lovers and a Potential 1 I was chatting with .. My Lover was a Dom I was unaware of it tho as he wasn't practicing at that time he was very caring Loving we had an amazing Connection Connection on all Levels..Physically it was the most erotic sizzling sex I've ever shared I gasve myself up to him I've never takeb a submissive role before but He was Amazing I respected this Man in every way.. I knew he could take me thro this Encounter.. I brought Balance within him he energized me .. It still affects me to this day as I'm talking about him and our Encounter .. He decided to return to the Lifestyle because of me :) Thanks R for our Experience Connection with eachother ..I know you won't see this Post but you'll feel My Energies :) Cheers Lu :)
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RopeMaster
12 years ago
At the outset, the big attraction to bondage with most people is being the focus of all attention. You are tied up and immobilised and have relinquished control. You are at his/her mercy and the thrill of this can be mind blowing, especially if the dom has a great imagination and range of ideas to pleasure you. Not knowing what lies in store for you is part of the fun. The slight fear of the unknown, the pushing of personal boundaries and the idea of being at someones every whim and pleasure are all attractions that add to the experience. Once you have tasted this erotic thrill, there is no turning back!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Now luckily for me, I can sidestep that challenge, seeing as you have your one and only master.Gotta love them get outta gaol cards.I'm not sure I have thatwhole Master thing going on these days.Cheers Felonious
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RHP User
12 years ago
While i dont type myself as anything, most popel in Perth scene have characterised me as a Domme. Ive been into dominating consenting men for about 8 years (i am only 24 after all). Personally im into strap-on play, cock and ball torture, forced bi, cuckolding. I am not a sadist so i dont like to inflict extreme pain but some does come with the territory. Like some people above me have already stated, it's all about trust. so in my belief having a bdsm one-nighter is not possible. And most importantly, i never try to dom anyone who does not want to submit- consent is not something to be taken lightly. Have fun with it, All the best :) ps- if you really want to get into this kind of thing i suggest fetlife.com for some research :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
The Physical pain inflicted most of the chain bondage was by his request and stretching his Boundaries was what he needed wanted..They stretched mine to because as those who read My Posts concerning Sexual Intimacy I'm all about Spiritual Connections on all Levels Sensual equal Pleasuring ..This was out of My comfort zone especially inflicting pain.. I admit the Domination taking control the Bondage I enjoyed once I allowed myself to go with it..plus saw the Pleasure he gained from it .. Cheers Lu :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
I apologise for not replying the last few days to the replies on my posts. I've been away and had my focuses elsewhere, however, I'll start working my way through tonight. I do, however, have one reply to one person, even though he won't read this bt I just feel I'd like to have my say on this one: PassionateMoment: While I appreciate your reply and open to people's different views on any subject, it's a pity your post reflects the inability for you to realise that others have different views as well. BDSM, like many other things, sexual and non sexual, can be different for everyone at different levels. I understand you have quite a lot of experience in this matter, however, that doesn't make you an expert and it doesn' mean that your views are the only right views. As for my "emphasis", I thought that was asking others to share their thoughts, views and experiences as I had only lightly touched on this and I apologise if my post reflects otherwise. I know my boundaries and how far I'd like to delve into this, so, to be honest, I think I'm happy with just scraping the surface and not interested in delving further than I already have. I'm sorry to hear that you won't be coming in here any further as I think you and I could have some healthy debates on different subjects in here.
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RHP User
12 years ago
BDSM has never been a part of my sexual activity but after reading the above ' Im starting to wonder if I've been missing something .? Willing to experiment with either a experienced female who knows what she is doing or beginner just like myself willing to explore and see what its all about.... nothing ventured ' nothing gained... Jay...
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RHP User
12 years ago
i am a funny one i guess...... i have a normal relationship..... wife, kids, etc etc... day to day we are normal.... as if nothing has happened... but sexually, i fuck her good and all that stuff.... but about twice a week on average she doms to the extreme...... cuckold, strapons, knives stabbing me, burning, scat and everything else extreme... and as soon as it is done its all about helping me, tending to my wounds etc and then carry on like nothing happened
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RHP User
12 years ago
It really comes down to completely giving yourself to that person. My husband and I semi 'live the lifestyle'. I'm a stay at home housewife and my job is to cater to his every need. But in doing that I get everything I want and need out of our relationship.He is truly my best friend and master. Even when we're apart and using our open relationship, I only sleep with women because I can only share myself fully with him... It's not about the pain, it's the trust you're placing in the other person to take your body, please and tease it as they see fit. Don't think that 50shades of grey is bdsm either!!!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Wow... You must have a HUGE pain thresh hold... Quoting 'coops14' i am a funny one i guess...... i have a normal relationship..... wife, kids, etc etc... day to day we are normal.... as if nothing has happened... but sexually, i fuck her good and all that stuff.... but about twice a week on average she doms to the extreme...... cuckold, strapons, knives stabbing me, burning, scat and everything else extreme... and as soon as it is done its all about helping me, tending to my wounds etc and then carry on like nothing happened
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RHP User
12 years ago
yes i do.... well, when it comes to sex... the difference between us and most is while she does this stuff it is during sex... she will be riding my cock as she does it.... and i see how much it excites her... based on that i would do ANYTHING/let her do anything... i love it...... if it is something the woman LOVES im in and get off from it... but it is not the same if the woman is doing it for the sake of my kinky pleaures... when i know its real as to what she likes i have no limits and the pain is amazing and makes me blow the biggest loads.... but only if the act is a "real" turn on for her, and not doing it to keep me happy.. if that makes sence. and without the cock stimulation, im not sure if i could take the pain so well as i do
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RHP User
12 years ago
One day she's gunna get a little too carried away with the knife, and we shall be reading all about it in the paper.Cheers Felonious
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RHP User
12 years ago
When the mood takes me I like a lite spanking and I like my hair pulled when doing doggy. Thats about my limit.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'coops14' i am a funny one i guess...... i have a normal relationship..... wife, kids, etc etc... day to day we are normal.... as if nothing has happened... but sexually, i fuck her good and all that stuff.... but about twice a week on average she doms to the extreme...... cuckold, strapons, knives stabbing me, burning, scat and everything else extreme... and as soon as it is done its all about helping me, tending to my wounds etc and then carry on like nothing happenedI take my hat off to you for being able to handle that. Personally, I couldn't never do that or take that, but it's all fascinating.
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RHP User
12 years ago
its an amazing feeling.... hope you dont ready about it in the paper!! lol.... we dont drink or do drugs... so we dont have the problem of being intoxicated and getting killed..... but it is me who still gets a little carried away... she stabbed me in the shoulder as i was ready to cum, she held the blad in her hand so only the tip was showing and dug it all the way in... it was so intense i grabbed the balde and pulled more of it out of her hand so more blade was expsed and begged for 1 hard dep one and she did it... still not deep enough to do real damage... perhaps could of used a stich or 2, put i didnt nbother going docs... just got a nice little scar which is also HOT......
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RHP User
12 years ago
Some of the posts have tweaked a recent curiosity - especially the trust connection aspectsCan anyone recommend any good books on the subject?
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