Tourist60

Tourist60

M71

Being educated and intelligent - why does it discourage so many many people?

September 05 2018

I can't complain about my lot in life ... however I find it curious that everything is going well until a woman or couple discover that I have a couple of doctorates and an IQ in the 160s. I usually don't mention either, but as soon as someone asks I find it difficult to lie. Strange that they are usually ok with people being able to outrun/jump/throw them but as soon as someone wins medals/prizes for maths and science they seem to become withdrawn/awkward. When the topic does not arise, everyone seems ok and a good time is had by all. I have only met one woman who described herself as a sapiophile and we had an amazing time. (people who are imaginative and creative in one area often transfer those attributes to the sexual domain). So, any thoughts on this please?

Comments

  • sweetnsensual

    sweetnsensual

    6 years ago

    I guess it’s so people meet people with the same backgrounds and are able to communicate - Posted from rhpmobile

  • OkeyDoke45

    OkeyDoke45

    6 years ago

    Who asks about IQs these days? Ditto the qualification/s, lots of people ask what you do for a living but I've never had someone ask about my qualifications (or lack thereof). ''Sapiophile'' seems to be the new in-thing, like narcissism and those ''on the spectrum''.

  • Mischeviouslad

    Mischeviouslad

    6 years ago

    IF you think intelligence is an issue (hint.... it’s not) and IF you keep having these conversations (hint.... don’t!).... .....then the fact that you keep repeating the behaviour patterns you recognise as detrimental has me starting to wonder if your IQ is as high as you say it is In any case, EQ stands for more in human attraction than IQ 🧐 - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    6 years ago

    In my experience most people don't actually give a fuck about your acedemic achievements or your assessed level of intelligence. They care about personality traits like narcissism, gloating, boasting, one up manship, lack of modesty, conveying a self imposed sence of intellectual superiority. And that's about as much of a turn on as someone talking about how wealthy they are frankly, which is not at all. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    6 years ago

    ..Can you elaborate a bit more?I agree with the others...but your theory sounds interesting. In my experience, too, in a social meeting, most people don't care about the level of education you've achieved or IQ. And there's a lot of sense in that as they aren't important social tools...like amiability or looks.Maybe the pond of women/couples you are meeting is a niche one?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    6 years ago

    Shame your not a genius at photography you could end up with more interest in your other attributes.😝 - Posted from rhpmobile

  • blondes6365

    blondes6365

    6 years ago

    Who cares about your intelligence Are you street wise life wise Some of the richest people in the world dont have high IQs

  • AnnieWhichway

    AnnieWhichway

    6 years ago

    IQ is not directly related to the ability to socially interact but many with high IQ do have trouble integrating into a normal social environment. They can be awkward. But that's not saying its disproportionate to the ratio of those with lower IQ. I think we expect too much of those with high IQ and when they fail to reach that high mark it is more noticeable and surprises us that in that area of life they under achieve. ie dumber than us.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    6 years ago

    ...as an IQ in that range would put you close to Einstein’s and we’re not talking the dog in the “Back to the Future” movies either. Here’s a question relative to the inverse of flux capacity of this site? Who gives a fuck? SLH PhD, MBA, BA Dumb is inevitable ...stupid is optional! 🤠⚡️ - Posted from rhpmobile

  • DynamicCouple36

    DynamicCouple36

    6 years ago

    Inferiority / Insecurity complexes perhaps ?? If one appears to be more intelligent, more affluent, more classy , one is labelled as a stuck up tall poppy. A phrase / description coined by mediocrity to make themselves feel better about the way they are. Jealousy driven. We had not encounterd such a concept (tall poppy syndrome) before moving to Australia. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • cat_n_the_hatter

    cat_n_the_hatter

    6 years ago

    “One can generally say this about men: that they are ungrateful, fickle, simulators and deceivers, avoiders of danger, greedy for gain... men are less hesitant about harming someone who makes himself loved than one who makes himself feared because love is held together by a chain of obligation which, since men are a sorry lot, is broken on every occasion in which their own self-interest is concerned; but fear is held together by a dread of punishment which will never abandon you.” -Niccolo Machiavelli, THE PRINCE He was intelligent. Luckily I don't think that way... and that is why I still love people. It is the whole person that matters. (Ms)

  • Rlee552

    Rlee552

    6 years ago

    ... not sure how to respond to this. Should I use a humble brag or self deprecating humour? However what I have found is most people on this site I have dealt with have never asked me for my IQ, have appreciated been treated with respect and have been great people. Yes I have been rejected and accepted (rejections of course far outweighing the acceptance). That is their choice because of what they are looking for. As far as I am aware though I have never ever been rejected because they are unhappy with the size of my IQ. No judgment, no expectations.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    6 years ago

    an educated and intelligent person doesn't walk around telling people how educated and intelligent they are... or post about it on their dating website profile... - Posted from rhpmobile

  • Tourist60

    Tourist60

    6 years ago

    For the record I don't keep having "these conversations", nor do I volunteer information but people often ask what I do for a living, it's small talk but if I disclose how I earn my money and what my hobbies are, some people start to feel awkward because it obvious from my occupation what my educational background and IQ must be. Sadly, I am not a very good liar. It is not all people who ask, and of those who do, most are ok but occasionally some people find it difficult. It doesn't worry me especially, I have good friends who are gardeners and I have friends with major awards in maths, science and the arts. It's just something that I am trying to understand... after all, I am not on this site for maths and science.

  • nightingale8

    nightingale8

    6 years ago

    The answer is in the question. If conversation typically veers back to what degree, IQ score or prize you have achieved it probably says the conversation is not as creative or engaging as it could be. That people stop there is probably a symptom of them having lost a sense of connection with you and giving up. Nothing really to do with the achievement itself. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • OkeyDoke45

    OkeyDoke45

    6 years ago

    Quoting 'DynamicCouple36' If one appears to be more intelligent, more affluent, more classy , one is labelled as a stuck up tall poppy. Jealousy driven. It's the ''appearing'' part that is tricky. You can have those attributes (two of which are subjective), but if you think that by having those attributes you are a better person than everyone else then, well, you're just a prat. If you make a habit of wearing those attributes like a badge, like OP sounds like he does, then you can add ''twat'' to the previous, thus making you a ''twatprat''. Lop such tall poppies where you find them, I say. I work with people who collect degrees and higher qualifications like some people collect Pokémon cards, stick a textbook in front of them and they could memorize it in under a week. Yet they can't reverse a car, can't get their heads around the whole mirrors thing. Totally bamboozled as to why their food keeps turning to cinders in the microwave when they punch in 10 minutes on high then go check their emails. I know heaps of people that are affluent - and such people usually think this instantly confers class - whose vernacular turns to right gutter trash after a few drinks, then they're throwing up in the garden with their pants around their knees.

  • honkytonk

    honkytonk

    6 years ago

    i tell people i am an accountant and raise turtles

  • Forus1234

    Forus1234

    6 years ago

    Perhaps, by coming on the forums, you may come in contact with people of your own calibre, we say that in a positive way. It’s hard for you to lie, may be an Aspie thing, as well as reading social cues. People can be so mean sometimes. It may be, people feel inferior in regards to your achievements. Your a gifted man, keep your chin up! We have a few friends the same. We hear you!

  • Mischeviouslad

    Mischeviouslad

    6 years ago

    My earlier comment points still stand even in light of the "additional" information. Ive never had anyone mention feeling intimidated of my intelligence, my work, hobbies, shoe size, inner leg length, hand span, visual acuity, witty repertoire of anecdotes or my ability to reach the top shelf at Woolies. That doesn't mean they haven't felt those things..... BUT...... my EQ enables others to feel comfort and acceptance in my presence, not challenged..... and those two factors override all other emotions when sitting close or intimately with others. I suggest thats where your topic answer lays. DG