F52
Being the ugly friend
February 26 2014
Comments
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gazpacho
11 years ago
I think I will come back to this when I am in the mood to read. There's much to be said about being the wingman. I think the "ugly friend" is hardly appropriate... given that people can look sensational but still be really ugly people at the same time. When you shut your eyes, which voice do you like most? HugsGazpacho
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Isn't that why brides choose plumper less attractive bridesmaids?! ;-)
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RHP User
11 years ago
What a barb! I have often been the the wingman(woman). Had a drop dead gorgeous girlfriend once. We went to Brisbane together on a working holiday. She used to pull the guys in with her looks, but it was always me they talked to as she used to sit there like a stale bottle of piss! I never lacked for male attention because of it. At other times in my life, I have been the prettier one, but again it was sometimes the sheer personality of my friend that got her the attention. It works both ways I have found.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Isn't that why brides choose plumper less attractive bridesmaids?! ;-) That's YOUR strategy :) You've talked about it here a number of times. It's calculating, rather than kind I think, but each to their own of course.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have been lucky in that men do find me attractive. I am not sure what it is, but its been too easy to get attention and not always for the right reasons. I was the quintessential tall leggy blonde with the great boobs. age soon puts that stereotype to bed, you cannot always play on your looks. so in the end, its your other qualities that will follow you into old age. Your right, I have friends that are put in that category by men. you go out and men make a bee line to the bobbies and their friend has to take one for the team. The irony is that most of my girlfriends that fitted into that narrow view from a mans eyes , were much better in the sack than I could ever hope to be. The reason is, that all I had to do was lay back, like a star fish while the boys played with the blow up barbie doll.Other women know, that the body may not fit the airbrushed image so many of us are supposed to be, that they actually try harder, they develop much better communication and perception skills than the empty beauty does. I have lost a lot of girlfriends, one just recently who in the end put me up as bait to get men to fuck her. It hurts me to think that because men desired me over her that I lost a very good friend. I have lost female friends, when I was a single woman as they could not trust their husbands, and in many cases they had a perfect right to be concerned. I would like a dollar for every husband of my friends, that ask me for sex. The ugly friend is the one that men if they had any brains at all would go for, as the others are often high maintenance, insecure, vain, and sometimes out right mean girls. Because when your attractive you can get away with murder. men will buy you what ever you want, that job you want, easy just sit and uncross your legs and cross them again, or touch your face, smile to a man in at interview and so long as you have some skill required you will get that job over the smarter not so attractive woman and even a man. Rich guys will come after you, want to marry you. The world is at your finger tips, without any effort on your part. All you have to do is look pretty. if you think life is not given to the beautiful then your naïve. great post, from a very smart woman. self awareness is a rare gift. and cougar, well I pale in the background when I am with you, especially in the casino, though I did manage to chat up four sweet sexy poker players. Lady T admiring the candour
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Isn't that why brides choose plumper less attractive bridesmaids?! ;-) that's why we pick ugly men to stand next to, so that they go what the fuck is a good looking woman like her doing with that ugly dude. walks up to DG and smacks the back of his head when your into comedy , timing is everything
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
U-G-L-Y is a fugly word. Actually there is a famous photography agency who only photographs those who condemn themselves ugly. There some fantastic pictures which I consider absolutely beautiful. ugly models dot com dot com To me there is no such thing as an "UGLY" friend or person. I do dislike it when I hear girlfriends put them selves down. It shits me, it just shows to me they want validation or they lack self confidence. I believe there is beauty in everyone. What's not attractive to one is attractive to another. A person is what he/she is and not what he/she looks like Foxy
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'SuperFoxxxy' It shits me, it just shows to me they want validation or they lack self confidence. I liked a lot of your post Foxxy, but I thought the comment above was unnecessarily harsh. Everyone struggles with something from time to time. I can understand not wanting to encourage a friend to dwell and wallow, but I certainly wouldn't want a friend judging me like that.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Great beauty is a great burden....I have a male friend who becomes extremely anxious in public because people stare at him.....he is an introvert and hates this kind of attention. Unconventional beauty is far more interestinng than the seemingly perfect.....the modelling industry has finally caught on to this fact. For me a beautiful mind will trump a beautiful face any day xx Q
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RHP User
11 years ago
"I like your post Being the ugly friend in the forum.makes us think what is real.vision is only electrical pulses.Signals from our brain so in actual fact we don’t really see. We just get pulses of electricity that make a picture.so in the end its our minds the that say what real beauty is .thats were our hart can see clearer ....."
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RHP User
11 years ago
Hi. Thanks for the reply. Hope we can get to know our likes and did likes. We are alot of fun and would like to share some of the fun with you. Let me know if you want to find out more ? - Posted from rhpmobile
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
Quoting 'lilmiss_fussy' Quoting 'SuperFoxxxy' It shits me, it just shows to me they want validation or they lack self confidence. I liked a lot of your post Foxxy, but I thought the comment above was unnecessarily harsh. Everyone struggles with something from time to time. I can understand not wanting to encourage a friend to dwell and wallow, but I certainly wouldn't want a friend judging me like that. I think you read it wrong. Re-read my post and the lines above and below, which you didn't re-quote. To me there is no such thing as ugly as I quoted and you didn't re-quote that as well. UGLY meaning: unpleasant or repulsive, especially in appearance. Foxy
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Violetincredible
11 years ago
I love it that way! I love having beautiful male/female lovers and friends... Hehe I also like to fly under the radar... If you are with people who capture all the attention you can get away with pretty much anything with no one noticing :) Xxviolet
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RHP User
11 years ago
Can be totally awesome! I am the ugly friend. I see them get hit on by guy after guy after guy. Whereas me, I can drink and dance to my hearts content without being bothered by pesky people. What I lack in looks and boobs I make up for in personality :-) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
the smart one's pick up on the wit
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RHP User
11 years ago
You know , I hate seeing someone give up and settle for such a title as "Ugly". How are you , Lil_Miss , qualified to make such a judgement on yourself ? I see "Attractive" women in the media and they're ugly to me . Why ? Because what's in their minds and hearts is ugly . And that internal ugliness consumes their outward appearance (in my eyes) . Quasimodo and the Elephant Man were Ugly . Not because of their minds and hearts but because of their extreme physical deformities . Lil_Miss , I think your mind and heart are VERY Attractive . I remember when I was a teenager , I looked down at my legs and I thought they looked fat . When I looked at my legs in the mirror , they didn't look fat . It's about Perspective and the angle at which you look at things . We are always our harshest Critic and the imperfections we see in ourselves are rarely seen by anyone else . Lil_Miss , I think you're looking at things from the wrong angle and you need to change your Perspective ... GG♒️ - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I think everyone has beauty and something to offer....its so subjective. Who is too say who is ugly and whose beautiful...... I would be worried about someone who needs to put seone down as ugly in order to feel better about themselves.?!!!!
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Quoting 'lilmiss_fussy' Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Isn't that why brides choose plumper less attractive bridesmaids?! ;-) That's YOUR strategy :) You've talked about it here a number of times. It's calculating, rather than kind I think, but each to their own of course. FFS lilmiss..... go down to Aldi and buy a sense of humour. lol Sheeeeeeeeeesh DG
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Quoting 'lilmiss_fussy' Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Isn't that why brides choose plumper less attractive bridesmaids?! ;-) That's YOUR strategy :) You've talked about it here a number of times. It's calculating, rather than kind I think, but each to their own of course. FFS lilmiss..... go down to Aldi and buy a sense of humour. lol Sheeeeeeeeeesh DG but I just don't find you funny. I'll save my laughs for better jokes tyvm :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
I think you read it wrong. I commented on the rest of your post, saying I liked it. I quoted the section that I thought seemed out of step with the rest of your post and a bit harsh. Paraphrasing you, while you think ugly is an awful word, it shits you when friends are down on themselves because they either just want validation or they have low self-esteem. My point was that we all need validation sometimes, we all have low self-esteem at times, and I would home my friends could love and support me through that. As I said, I liked the rest of your post, I just found that bit quite jarring.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
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RHP User
11 years ago
Yes we are all beautiful in our own way. We can spout all the platitudes we like but when it all boils down... Beauty really is in the eye of the beholder. I raised my kids to the notion that when you are 90 you are all going to be ugly. Go for personality. Personality lasts. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
If I had what you have, I wouldn't be spending so many nights alone.
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blkcapricornday
11 years ago
I think you're damn hot LMF, and from reading your posts, you sound like a very beautiful person. It's all subjective isn't it, but superficiality is no match for honesty and positivity. So there :P
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blond_gypsy
11 years ago
There are a lot of very attractive women in this topic proclaiming to be ugly. You're all completely mental!
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RHP User
11 years ago
The 'ugly friend' is a concept. It's about being overlooked, being the last one noticed, and so on. That's true for me and yes, sometimes it can be tough. But, as I wrote in my OP, I value much more in myself than my average looks. And while I'm most definitely the ugly friend I don't see myself as an ugly person. And I do truly value myself. I'm hardest on myself when I think my actions aren't beautiful, not my looks ;) The post was really about honouring inner beauty. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
What tag? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Thank you for the kindness folks xxx - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
What a great and honest post, thank you. I only wish the term "ugly" could be replaced by "less conventionally beautiful" or something. Nit-picking maybe, but to hear anyone call themselves ugly makes me sad. Loving the responses too. During my lifetime I've been both been the less attractive and more attractive friend and it's been interesting seeing both sides. But DG, I'm not saying anything about you commenting on every forum, but how nice would it be if you actually had something useful/nice/insightful to say every time you did. You remind me of my dog Jack, who must piss on every single tree just to show everyone he was there.
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Smilingwithfun
11 years ago
I agree with blkcapricornday. Beauty is subjective & no match for who you are.
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
I agree with that statement "to hear anyone call themselves "ugly" makes me sad" Makes me sad as well. Come to think of it....I don't ever think I have heard a male friend call them self "ugly" or that they are an "ugly person"?? I believe women call themselves that more than men. Shall I dare say it??.....Yep I am going to say it!! I believe women are a lot more competitive amongst each other about looks etc etc. Sometimes women are threatened by their friend looks, personality, charm etc etc Sometimes women are NOT threatened, they are supportive for who their friend ist. As Lady T said, she has lot girlfriends because of it. I say to my GF's and they too agree, women can become competitive, especially when it comes to men. I believe they call them self "The ugly friend" because they lack self-confidence and are threatened by their friends charm, looks etc etc. It just makes me sad, I would like to think my friends accept me for whom I am - faults and all. :) I believe each and every one of us are uniquely beautiful one way or another. :) Foxy
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On_Safari
11 years ago
Ugly is as ugly does.....you can be pretty as hell but if you have an ugly, mean spirited soul being pretty won't save you. Liking the post very much Lil Miss and can relate so well. Satan used to tell me I was ugly, that no-one would ever love me. I've been told I'm plain and that I don't fit in. Fit in with what? (Gentle ironic smile) I think being told these things simply made me work on my social skills and other traits. (Shrugs) I'm loud, empathetic...I smile alot, I don't simper and I'm without guile. I'm not the prettiest rose on the bush but I'm alive with colour and for some reason people enjoy me. I had a girlfriend once, the leggy blonde....slightly younger way back when. We were out one night and met some guys. She was quite taken by one of them and flirted, body language working overtime and his friends were all enamoured of her. I'm no mute, even at 18 so the conversation was animated and I had everyone laughing and enjoying themselves. Who did he ask out? (Soft smile) Lil Miss I've found it easier in life not to worry about competing for anyone's attention, people are going to like you for you or not at all because, in the words of my longest best friend; some orople are just assholes. 😏 ~ Indy. I go alright for an old cracker!
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RHP User
11 years ago
When you go through your Teenage years it hurts like hell. However when I look back, I am the strongest mentally to many of my "good looking" female friends. When you are younger you cant get this women, why they are so down and always miserable....you don't get what is wrong with them. my sister is the pretty one.....gggrrrrrMaybe life teaches the " not so good looking" once to stand up and live life to the fullest with pride. I was given this Body for a reason, that's my thinking, so live with it and make the best out of it.I never feel lonely or hate myself anymore, Now I know who I am.Yes say on here, I loose because I am not the "BODY".:) sounds funny.....still this doesn't matter because I am used to it. I am Me.......that's all what counts.I am not saying I am getting never jealous, Oh I do.....but I know my short comings...so I deal with them in my way.Hoo ray to the not so pretty once.L
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'SuperFoxxxy' Shall I dare say it??.....Yep I am going to say it!! I believe women are a lot more competitive amongst each other about looks etc etc. Sometimes women are threatened by their friend looks, personality, charm etc etc Sometimes women are NOT threatened, they are supportive for who their friend ist. As Lady T said, she has lot girlfriends because of it. I say to my GF's and they too agree, women can become competitive, especially when it comes to men. Unfortunately I have experienced this first hand, and I ditched the 'friendship' as a result.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Ahhhh Meander... Nice to know you're following me :-)
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Lovinit28andKC72
11 years ago
I never look at any of my friends male or female as ugly, because they're all beautiful and I tell them every chance I get, just how beautiful they are.... I will also tell a complete stranger walking past me down the street that they're beautiful or they look fantastic..... Anyway who defines what's ugly, everybody looks at things differently, what might be ugly to one, might not be ugly to another.. It doesn't really matter how beautiful you are on the outside, if your ugly on the inside. Ugliness that comes from within, will sooner or later make you ugly on the outside....and as cliche as it might sound "true beauty comes from within" - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'LadyTuscan'The ugly friend is the one that men if they had any brains at all would go for, as the others are often high maintenance, insecure, vain, and sometimes out right mean girls. Because when your attractive you can get away with murder. I agree with basically everything LadyTuscan has said. . I have to say though, I am very thankful that whilst I may have been underestimated at times as "the ugly friend" (I really loathe that terminology OP, for reasons MisterGreen puts forth above), I've made a concentrated effort throughout my life of spending much of my time, be it in friendships or relationships, with men with brains, so perhaps as a result, my self esteem, confidence and self awareness has remained in tact and I have had only successful and for the most part, healthy relationships as a result. It is indeed true that we are our own worst critic, but define beautiful in my eyes, and aesthetics truly don't come into play too much. . Thanks for posting the article, great topic! . Flirty x
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tall60
11 years ago
The french have words for this...jolie laide or belle laide...ugly beautiful for non conventional beauty.Methinks people take it as a compliment. Ive noticed that after satisfying sex, women glow with jolie laide.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Lovinit28' I never look at any of my friends male or female as ugly, because they're all beautiful and I tell them every chance I get, just how beautiful they are.... I will also tell a complete stranger walking past me down the street that they're beautiful or they look fantastic..... Anyway who defines what's ugly, everybody looks at things differently, what might be ugly to one, might not be ugly to another.. It doesn't really matter how beautiful you are on the outside, if your ugly on the inside. Ugliness that comes from within, will sooner or later make you ugly on the outside....and as cliche as it might sound "true beauty comes from within" - Posted from rhpmobile I always do this, I love to compliment people on not only their looks, but other things about them that I find lovely. a smile, how they serve me when I go to dinner, how the shop assistant goes out of their way, every day we can say something nice to a stranger. You can light up a persons face, just by being nice, and then you see the real beauty in a person. that's why we should step out side of what we think is attractive, and engage that person and give them time to shine. Then your eyes will open to who they are. Superficial beauty anyone can see, the hidden treasures take a little longer to see. love to make a person smile, and to feel valuedthank you are two words you cant say enough times. and Cougar, thank you for your friendship and the glorious garden you have created for me.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Is not only in the eye of the beholder, it is in each and everyone of us :) a smile, a twinkle in the eye, the curve of a cheek....a beautiful heart and mind :) everyone has something xxx - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Is not only in the eye of the beholder, it is in each and everyone of us :) a smile, a twinkle in the eye, the curve of a cheek....a beautiful heart and mind :) everyone has something xxx - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I am an average looking person... Some find me physically attractive, other don't and that is cool; depends what people are looking for. In my experience, and there have been some exceptions, those, from both genders, who would be the "beautiful people" haven't always made the best lovers. I have always put it down to them being used to people wanting and trying to please them, that they seem to be less interested in pleasing me or other people. Even out of bed, I've often seen those, who know they are good looking, dismissive those who's beauty is not on the surface. When that is the case, then their good looks is a curse. When a stunningly good looking person is also a beautiful human being, then they have been doubly blessed. But at the end of the day, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.... the people I find attractive may not be the same as the next bloke.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'I_N_D_A_G_I_N_E' Ugly is as ugly does.....you can be pretty as hell but if you have an ugly, mean spirited soul being pretty won't save you. Liking the post very much Lil Miss and can relate so well. Satan used to tell me I was ugly, that no-one would ever love me. I've been told I'm plain and that I don't fit in. Fit in with what? (Gentle ironic smile) I think being told these things simply made me work on my social skills and other traits. (Shrugs) I'm loud, empathetic...I smile alot, I don't simper and I'm without guile. I'm not the prettiest rose on the bush but I'm alive with colour and for some reason people enjoy me. I had a girlfriend once, the leggy blonde....slightly younger way back when. We were out one night and met some guys. She was quite taken by one of them and flirted, body language working overtime and his friends were all enamoured of her. I'm no mute, even at 18 so the conversation was animated and I had everyone laughing and enjoying themselves. Who did he ask out? (Soft smile) Lil Miss I've found it easier in life not to worry about competing for anyone's attention, people are going to like you for you or not at all because, in the words of my longest best friend; some orople are just assholes. 😏 ~ Indy. I go alright for an old cracker! I have bum envy now.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'tall60' The french have words for this...jolie laide or belle laide...ugly beautiful for non conventional beauty.Methinks people take it as a compliment. Ive noticed that after satisfying sex, women glow with jolie laide. Love the French. They have a way of making everything beautiful. Listening to the words of Serge Gainsbourg's song "Laide Jolie Laide"
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RHP User
11 years ago
We are such interesting creatures us humans. It seems to me that the one thing that puts us down is when people through lack of personal awareness or through deliberate causes devalue us and that is horrible. Hurting others through ignorance or whatever reason comes back to bite us in all sorts of unexpected ways. Kindness and coming from a place of integrity feels so good and is so self/life affirming I really do not understand the logic of behaving in any other way if you want to feel good that is. I know this society is pretty fucked up though what with all of its hierarchical male dominated structures and the financial rewards for exploiting anything you can exploit and how our despair can cause us to do self destructive things. Go forth and meditate I reckon and find your inner centre and quiet down all of that confusing internal chatter and just be the sentient sensual loving being you were designed to be rather than being mind fucked into thinking you have to be something different by Murdoch and his mates… The thing I love about this place RHP is that it has the potential to subvert so many of the social paradigms that the church and the state have put in place to set us men and women against each other so they can control us. I cannot think of any way in which I would prefer to subvert the dominant paradigm…. Power to us!
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RHP User
11 years ago
I was the lessr attractive sister and always just in her shadow. I do remember a guy who back then had to ask my parents if he could take me out. Being only 16 at the time and we dated a few times. Then he turned up at my sisters work and confessed he ony dated me to get to her. My loving sister told him take a hike. It wasnt till a great young man took interest in me and not my sister for the first time. I then realised that I too had something to offer and I never thought about it again. Till this very day we are still in contact and he is still a great man.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Love your courage lilmissfussy :-) Life is easier for attractive people... as it is for white people rather than black people...and people with four limbs rather than three or two... its not fair... but at present, it is true. Then I think of Socrates and Eleanor Roosevelt and Golda Meir, apparently they were ugly, I think they must have been magnificent! Kiss to your lips x
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joanne1991
11 years ago
I think everyone has their own beauty and it is always in the eye of the beholder, don't change because of what you perceive people think you are. You may just be intimidating beautiful inside and out and so they don't look at you immediately Believe in yourself.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'explorateurs69'Life is easier for attractive people... Maybe some aspects appear easier to you, but everybody has their problems, they just differ in nature.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'explorateurs69'Life is easier for attractive people... I may be easier to get ahead in life if you're good-looking, but that does not mean life itself is easier. I know some stunningly beautiful people with dreadful lives.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I am supposedly considered physically attractive by some sort of standard (going by what I am told by people). And yes I have found it fairly easy to find guys willing to sleep with me (although they have almost always been guys I knew in some way, or that I met via internet sites. I wouldn't need two hands to count the amount of times a strange guy has tried to pick me up in public...maybe I just give off the wrong vibe for that, who knows). Unfortunately for me, particularly when I was younger and just out of a long term relationship that had begun when I was 16, this 'ease' coupled with my naievity led to some rather nasty experiences of sex which affected my work (I resigned from one job because of it), my self esteem, and ultimately my mental health. So, we all have our crosses to bear, they just differ in the type of wood they're made of.
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passion8_l
11 years ago
Quoting 'BradBi' I am an average looking person... Some find me physically attractive, other don't and that is cool; depends what people are looking for. In my experience, and there have been some exceptions, those, from both genders, who would be the "beautiful people" haven't always made the best lovers. I have always put it down to them being used to people wanting and trying to please them, that they seem to be less interested in pleasing me or other people. Even out of bed, I've often seen those, who know they are good looking, dismissive those who's beauty is not on the surface. When that is the case, then their good looks is a curse. When a stunningly good looking person is also a beautiful human being, then they have been doubly blessed. But at the end of the day, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.... the people I find attractive may not be the same as the next bloke. I consider myself to be an average looking person too but it is what's inside that makes someone truly beautiful, so long as I can face myself in the mirror each morning and feel good about the person I am thats what matters most to me.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Vail Charlotte Dawson. Bless her and her family.
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madotara69
11 years ago
inside a shell. Never seen an ugly pair of smiling eyes, there is some black and nasty eyes that hide nasty things, never smile Don't see skinny to bones all of them showing, just for "the look" it does not look healthy, probably not healthy any how. So often see the ladies talk of melting moments to chiselled muscle men, not of an ounce for fat. Hopefully men don't feel flat to the gabble Or it all sounds like psychobabble wrap to me. Tara has a little unicorn tattoo on her thigh, when she was pregnant the unicorn turned into a Clydesdale, for a while. So what, she is beautiful so are paintme's tits beautiful, she shows them to us blokes all the time, because she knows we appreciate them, he he. See that, paintme is also one of the sexiest women, seen in ages, because she was feeling sexy, that's cool And my face looks like my arsehole, my mother thinks I am gorgeous Grandad use to say The first third of your life you spend thinking of looking at everyone The second third, you spend thinking of everyone looking at you The third, you realise no one was really looking at anyone at all. He use to say " Ne ho mah, fugga bugga chung" now and then too. Mado Tara xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Violetincredible' I love it that way! I love having beautiful male/female lovers and friends... Hehe I also like to fly under the radar... If you are with people who capture all the attention you can get away with pretty much anything with no one noticing :) Xxviolet You are by no stretch of the imagination ugly in any relationship. You are a beautiful person inside and out. S x
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'explorateurs69'Then I think of Socrates and Eleanor Roosevelt and Golda Meir, apparently they were ugly hmm, hopefully not being the pretty one in the crowd doesn't always end up with a glass of hemlock ;-)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Isn't that why brides choose plumper less attractive bridesmaids?! ;-) Bridesmaids make every effort not to outshine the bride on their special day ... as good friends, relatives and genuine people are inclined to do. You really are a nasty piece of work DG. The satellite effect is actually when a real woman discovers your true nature and kicks your ass into orbit. - where it belongs. OP as a fellow "ugly friend" I can tell you there are upsides. As noted externally beautiful people quickly discover that they are admired only superficially and after having their fill of superficial meaningless relationships struggle to separate those that admire them for the right reasons. This effect probably translates to all women in the online dating environment to some degree ? A big advantage of being the physically "ugly" one is that you KNOW unequivocally when someone demonstrates a genuine interest that it is for the RIGHT reasons. Your friend must be really hot ... you're no ugly duckling that is for sure.
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RHP User
11 years ago
From an ugly guy to the girl next door looks :) I may have a head for radio n happy to make a friend look better lol Give me a natural girl next door look any day :) there hearts are real
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RHP User
11 years ago
Seeing the positive side of being the less conventionally beautiful (how was that, Meander? :)) friend. As I said in my post, I have plenty of self-confidence and value my other qualities over my looks. Yes, I want to do some things to improve physically, but mostly I'm interested in being a good person. blkcapricornday, I really liked your post about the challenges of being beautiful. It seems some beautiful people want others to look past their looks and see into their hearts, and some less beautiful people want others to look past their looks and see into their hearts. How interesting! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Lilmiss_fussy, being the older and less attractive of the Sexylicious duo, I'm hearing you, however, as many here have stated, a gorgeous face doesn't mean a gorgeous person. Some people are attractive on the outside and extremely ugly on the inside which, in turn, makes them ugly all over and very unappealing.. We've met some much younger couples of late and very attractive and I always seem to think they may be a bit 'out of my league'. But where does my league end? Where does anyone's league end? it doesn't!!!... There's always people out there who see past the facade of plastic tits, bulging pecs and six packs, blemish free faces, materialistic rubbish and pinkie fingers hanging off crystal wine glasses. Let's just hope we all bump into them more often than not. Now.... Did any of that make sense??? Ha!ha!ha! :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
When I was 25, backpacking my way through Australia, I was what society might call conventionally beautiful (tall, size 8, pretty face, etc.) I lived with two Irish girls for a while who thought the opposite of themselves and were quite vocal about this. We went out one night, and half a dozen guys approached me throughout the night trying to chat me up when all I wanted to do was play pool with my friends. Towards the end it actually got quite annoying, especially went I went to the bathroom and a man approached them to ask for my number. On our way home one of the girls said: "You know, I really thought I wanted to look like you, but after tonight I'm so glad I don't." A lifetime ago, but I've never forgotten that.
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RHP User
11 years ago
When I was 25, backpacking my way through Australia, I was what society might call conventionally beautiful (tall, size 8, pretty face, etc.) I lived with two Irish girls for a while who thought the opposite of themselves and were quite vocal about this. We went out one night, and half a dozen guys approached me throughout the night trying to chat me up when all I wanted to do was play pool with my friends. Towards the end it actually got quite annoying, especially went I went to the bathroom and a man approached them to ask for my number. On our way home one of the girls said: "You know, I really thought I wanted to look like you, but after tonight I'm so glad I don't." A lifetime ago, but I've never forgotten that.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Now I really sound like a twat.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' When I was 25, backpacking my way through Australia, I was what society might call conventionally beautiful (tall, size 8, pretty face, etc.) I lived with two Irish girls for a while who thought the opposite of themselves and were quite vocal about this. We went out one night, and half a dozen guys approached me throughout the night trying to chat me up when all I wanted to do was play pool with my friends. Towards the end it actually got quite annoying, especially went I went to the bathroom and a man approached them to ask for my number. On our way home one of the girls said: "You know, I really thought I wanted to look like you, but after tonight I'm so glad I don't." A lifetime ago, but I've never forgotten that. the guy follow me into the loo, and said he would give me cocaine if I slept with him. I went out and complained to the bar tender, it was in the usa. He said that guy always get laid by beautiful women, and cocaine is what they call the white leash. not this little black duck. I have had total strangers come over when I am having a quiet lunch with a girlfriend and say, you have a great set of tits. Even bus drivers and taxi drivers , and like you say, every thing has its place and time. I wise man in Israel when I was out in the desert , bathing at a well. He looked me over and he said, In life , you need to refuse more, as men will always offer and it will do you no good in the end when your old. I took note of that, as when you get old and your tits sag and your face wrinkles, you better make sure you have something in the back that's deeper than that. I like the attention I get now, its more balanced and I am no longer a commodity, men have offered money many times but I kept my status as an enthusiastic armature , now I would take the cash and blow it on Botox lol. Lady T an oldie but a goodie
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RHP User
11 years ago
Lets bump uglies :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
The ugly one's always the cool one though, right? The one with heart,soul, personality....at least according to 80's Romantic comedies.....oh and 90s romant....wait 2000s too, oh Zooey Deschanel, 2010.....
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RHP User
11 years ago
When I was young about 14 I was put in a private school and was bullied by a bunch of.girls and their favorite insult was to call me ugly. I didn't look in the mirror for 4 years after that. But when I was 18 I started to look at myself and was surprised by what I saw , my height was an advantage my strawberryblond hair unusual my figure nice to look at and my face had lost its baby fat, high cheek bones big blue eyes etc etc . I would never call myself beautiful but I am cute. And as my mum once told me beauty fades but cutness lasts forever. I see beauty in most everyone I meet and I wish others could too. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I always figured if I couldn't be beautiful at least I could be smart and funny. P.s I do have a sister who is absolutely gorgeous yet doesn't see it .I think that makes her even more beautiful. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'KlixenFan' The ugly one's always the cool one though, right? The one with heart,soul, personality....at least according to 80's Romantic comedies.....oh and 90s romant....wait 2000s too, oh Zooey Deschanel, 2010..... Zooey Deschanel is ugly!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Lil-miss she is seemingly vacuous and annoying which makes her unattractive to me....it is all about the filter of our perceptions...we can never really know what others think of us because some will tell us what we want to hear...others will deliberately try and hurt us....the truth lies somewhere in between I suspect.... Some people over compensate with a narcissistic view of themselves which they present to others in the RHP mirror but really most swans and ducklings are just frantically paddling underneath the smooth surface xxQ
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'lilmiss_fussy' Quoting 'KlixenFan' The ugly one's always the cool one though, right? The one with heart,soul, personality....at least according to 80's Romantic comedies.....oh and 90s romant....wait 2000s too, oh Zooey Deschanel, 2010..... Zooey Deschanel is ugly! just like Leelee Sobieski was ugly in Never Been Kissed, or like Rachel Leigh Cook in "She's All That" ;)
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
Why would someone want to, deliberately try and hurt others?? Foxy.
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RHP User
11 years ago
As a mature man ( old & past it according to some) I can say that none, not one of the woman I know or meet pass the " model test" and I wouldn't have it any other way, I'm attracted to the whole woman, does she make me laugh, do I make her laugh, does her mind set fit with mine, do our interests compliment each other. In short is there a connection if there is I could not care less wether she carries a few pounds or is as skinny as a whippet..she is beautiful to me. In my younger days when out I regarded the stunning looking girls as manner from heaven as they kept loads of guys away from the girls I wanted to get to know. Ladies if you think you are attractive you will be to the REAL guys, leave the posers to each other. I'm sorry if I've offended the stunning ladies but most of them I've met are vacuous and hard work give me the " ugly friend" everyday a woman of substance and realality
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RHP User
11 years ago
Thank you for allowing me to indulge myself in you dirt patch. I am gonna make a gardener out of you yet, wait n see.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Makes us think what is real.vision is only electrical pulses. Signals from our brain so in actual fact we don’t really see. We just get pulses of electricity that make a picture.so in the end its our minds that say what real beauty is .that's were our hart can see clearer .....
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Nomo022014' Makes us think what is real.vision is only electrical pulses. Signals from our brain so in actual fact we don’t really see. We just get pulses of electricity that make a picture.so in the end its our minds that say what real beauty is .that's were our hart can see clearer ..... thats a good argument then against the people who climb up on a moral high horse about choosing someone for their brains and beautiful soul, blah blah. You say 'heart', I say 'bag of chemicals bumping together' some fire off at a funny joke, some fire off at a leggy blonde, bloke with a chiselled jaw, etc - each one as shallow as the other (its all just triggered reactions based on attributes)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'S_OnTheLoose' Quoting 'Nomo022014' Makes us think what is real.vision is only electrical pulses. Signals from our brain so in actual fact we don’t really see. We just get pulses of electricity that make a picture.so in the end its our minds that say what real beauty is .that's were our hart can see clearer ..... thats a good argument then against the people who climb up on a moral high horse about choosing someone for their brains and beautiful soul, blah blah. You say 'heart', I say 'bag of chemicals bumping together' some fire off at a funny joke, some fire off at a leggy blonde, bloke with a chiselled jaw, etc - each one as shallow as the other (its all just triggered reactions based on attributes) bag of chemicals bumping together True some tell me that bag feels love with love comes pain at one point or another some must have rocks in there may be when those people you talk about up on a moral high horse. don't have one.The bag breaks ..... chemicals ,and rocks fall out. ' thus the pain" eg... broken heart ... chemicals bumping together,rocks fusion They can now stand on top off i all (off course after it cools down) stand on pile ....climb up on a moral high horse happy days,
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