Come and share something lighthearted,upbeat or a little bit cheeky

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  Sawadee

  7 years ago

  On a camping trip in the middle of nowhere, 2 of us in our own 4WD s and my mate and his Mrs in theirs.. Anyway , we pull up to discuss where we were gunna make camp.. Then my mate and his Mrs start arguing about something completely ridiculous and it got a bit much for me , so I told him to shut the fuck up .. Well ? lol... That really gave him the shits and he says " well fuck all of you " I'm leaving ' and walks off down the road.. Now that may not seem funny , but the nearest town was about 200 klm away either way... Well we just looked at each other and burst out laughing.. He was almost outta sight , then we could see him turn around and back he came with this stupid smile on his face cause he knew it was funny too.. We still have a laugh about it..

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  Sawadee

  7 years ago

  We were sitting around a BBQ chewing the fat when the conversation turned to holidaying in Africa and camping out in the wild.. Someone mentioned Lions wandering into your camp and what would you do...Most of us of course said we'd need a gun.. But not my mate ,, very seriously he said he would take a umbrella... Umbrella ? laughing and spitting my beer, you gotta be joking , Nope' he says .. and explained it must be a red one so when you open it fast ' it looks like a big red mouth and it will run away... In tears , i told him his theory was up to shit and he could stick his brolley..

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  didn't like my question?

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  OkeyDoke45

  7 years ago

  Bingo is heaps of fun, shame more people don't get into it, more places don't run bingo nights/days. A great joke by the way OP. I can't tell jokes so I will simply retell some stuff that has really made me laugh of recent. Anyways, to the topic. The hardest I laughed of recent was when watching ''You Can't Ask That'' on ABC/iview, an episode about centenarians. One person asked the question ''why aren't you dead yet?'' of these lovely 100+ aged people. One woman answered ''because hasn't called my name yet'', to which the gent beside her responded ''I wouldn't be able to hear him if he was''. You know those ridiculous uncontrolled cackles that you do when caught off guard by something really funny? I did one of those. Oh, and any episode of Mad As Hell or The Katering Show.

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  OkeyDoke45

  7 years ago

  Jayme2 your mate sounds awesome. I say and do dumb shit all the time but am totally unashamed and not embarrassed at all when it happens. I am otherwise quite intelligent (I think) but sometimes the ''dumb-arse'' chip inside my head takes over. It gives everyone a laugh though, there should be more like us. A workmate once told me ''we all do stuff like that, we just don't tell everybody about it''. I think I had told him how I sometimes tap the pages of a print book expecting them to turn themselves, like my Kindle does. Or how I said ''thank you'' to a DVD-dispensing machine at the supermarket that one time. Or how I once managed to set fire to my own hand.

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't - Posted from rhpmobile

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  torryman

  7 years ago

  Why do women wear makeup and perfume????? Because they're ugly and they smell😳

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  Sawadee

  7 years ago

  Yep , he is... We've been mates since kindy.. I wouldn't trade him for quids..

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  The start of my commando days.... Lived on nsw central coast and used to commute to Sydney for work. Woke up late one morning got dressed running out the door realised my elastic in my undies had decided to give up the ghost. Running across the highway bam down they go. I stopped so I didn't trip up kicked them to the side and proceeded to catch my train to work. Was going to buy a new pair at lunch but decided I liked the freedom and never looked back. - Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  I found this lolNew Idea Magazine from 1957 ----- Mere Male A couple of the Mere Males in this magazine read…Suggested to my young Mere Male that he come home a little earlier at night, as I lie awake worrying until I hear him come in. “What on earth do you lie awake for Mum?” The police would let you know if I was in an accident?”Mere Male had a bilious attack on night and woke me saying, “Make me a cuppa. I’ve been awfully sick.” So I did. Several months later I had a bilious attack. Did he make me a cuppa? No. But he did suggest I make one for myself.The winning Mere Male which won 1 pound 1 shilling for the contributor was…Returning from an outing, I went into the kitchen to find parts of my Mixmaster strewn about. On asking Mere Male what he had been baking (knowing his love of food), I was completely floored when he replied, “No-thing. I’ve been mixing the paint with the Mixmaster, as it should make the paint nice and smooth.”

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  🍸🍸🍸🍸 Two women friends had gone for a girls night out. Both were very faithful and loving wives, but they had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi Breezers. Incredibly drunk and walking home, they needed to pee so they stopped in the cemetery. One of them had nothing to wipe with so she thought she would take off her panties and use them. Her friend, however, was wearing a rather expensive pair of panties and did not want to ruin them. She was lucky enough to squat down next to a grave that had a wreath with a ribbon on it, so she proceeded to wipe with that. After the girls did their business, they proceeded to go home. The next day, the husband of one of the women was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent wife was still in bed hung over, so he phoned the other husband and said, 'These girls nights out have got to stop! I'm starting to suspect the worst. My wife came home with no panties!!' 'That's nothing,' said the other husband, 'Mine came back with a card stuck to her a** that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station. We'll never forget you.'!' 😁😁

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  When Germaine Greer met Frank Zappa... I met Frank Zappa in 1973, I think it must have been, over breakfast in Hernando's Hideaway, the coffee shop of the Beverly Wilshire hotel, where he and his wife Gail were staying while their house in Laurel Canyon was redecorated. Their attention was drawn to me because of the staccato rustling of the rice-paper of my airmail copy of the Times, and the deep sighs I kept heaving. They asked me what was on my mind, that I sighed so often and so deeply. "My boyfriend in Detroit has just told me that he's got pubic lice. He thinks I gave them to him. I'm worried that the bastard has given them to me." "Not a problem," said Frank. His black Rolls-Royce with tinted windows was waiting in the hotel driveway; in no time we were at Schwob's drugstore, and Frank was yelling over the heads of the would-be Lana Turners twirling on the stools at the counter: "Blue lotion, please, blue lotion for the crabs." The words rang out like a triumphant fanfare...... lol

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  Dryphuz

  7 years ago

  Missionary with my first girlfriend... I hope she never caught on that all those times i was biting the pillow was not in ecstasy, but trying not to laugh from how much her cleavage farted when our bodies rubbed together... Last grilfriend loved blowing me. Once i really had to fart so i told her to stop, my intent being to leave the room and come back. She said not to worry and just get it over with... She'd never gagged while deep throating me before...

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