Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore.

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Brilliant! This actually made me laugh aloud.

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  That's why I always wear a bulletproof vest when fornicating.That, and it's kinky. ;)

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Quoting 'triunity' That's why I always wear a bulletproof vest when fornicating.That, and it's kinky. ;) Touche! :D

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  love it!

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Just love it after a guy has had oral sex with me and he pulls out a condom. Don't you guys know that safe sex means no liquid exchange whatsoever?

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Quoting 'neptune_drift' Brilliant! This actually made me laugh aloud.

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Yay humour, good one, yes laughed out loud

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  wannabyummymummy

  12 years ago

  for the giggles Glad to see not ALL the fun has left the forums............

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  a 404?x Hugs Hesone Glock

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Apparently at the same time his wife was shot in the mouth ......

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  After a long night of making love,the guy notices a photo of another man, on the woman's nightstand by the bed.He begins to worry.'Is this your husband?'he nervously asks.... 'No, silly,'she replies, snuggling up to him.'Your boyfriend, then?'he continues.'No, not at all,'she says, nibbling away at his ear.'Is it your dad or your brother?'he inquires, hoping to be reassured.'No, no, no! You are so hot when you're jealous!' she answers.'Well, who in the hell is he, then?'he demands.She whispers in his ear'That's me before the surgery.' ...

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  circa 1978 (ish) I was in a hotel in Leederville (Perth) got picked up by a girl, and taken back to her place. it was OBVIOUS there was a male living there.. but, she claimed it was her flatmate.. not that I cared. we were soon naked and doing the fun stuff, nicely trashed... when we were interupted. A person was VERY violently trying to get into the house.. the girl told me it was her BF and all shit was about to happen damn it.. I had clothes everywhere.. and boots and all.. so, I thought.."Bluff" Sit down, grab beer.... BF came in.. MAAAD.. and moved toward me..   I stood up.. naked.. and said... "I am not your problem mate, and you dont want to make me one.." maybe it was my nakedness and semi erectness that made him back off.. So, I say.. "she invited me, when she aske me to leave, I will leave.." and sat back down..   they kind of looked at each other.. and finally she snaps.. "Will you fuck off out of here .."   I grinned.. finished the beer.. got dressed.. INCLUDING tying my bootlaces..thanked her for the sex and beer.. thanked him for his understanding..and left..   Now... I reckon I did them a favour.. it difused the situation totally...and I reckon she never got her lights punched out.. I often think of this couple... and wonder about meeting one, or both of them again... I reckon it would be a good laugh..   caveman (bluff works.... SOMETIMES)

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  i probably would have shat all over his lounge room floor

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  that'd be an awkward experience!I have had that awkward experience when I was having a one night stand and the condom broke! :/ and I didn't really know him it was kinda gross put me off a bit

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  10 ft tall and bullet proof back then mate...   Plus, I never did like running from annywhere... running TO is much more enjoyable.. you can see what you are facing.. running away means the enemy is at your back..and never a good situation :)   It COULD have gone bad... and I could be telling another story... Which of course, I do have.. where bluff didnt work...and I didnt have the goods to back up my bluff...   All good..   caveman better staying in his cave

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Girl.. that COULD have turned out bad eh.. Unprotected sex can be Like chocolate.. a moment of you lips.. forever on your hips.. How would one state that? "five minutes in your lips .. nine months on your hips?" Nah.. that is corny.. but, you get the idea :)   caveman..

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  A condom was an alternative to a Flack jacket....but i bet your friend wasn't shot in the cokc - ergo still doenst prove a condom doesn't protect one's cock from bullets.

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  did you need to take flute lessons to be able to pee straight?

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