M42 F44
Couples using Single profiles... Is it wrong? Or am I being unrealistic?
February 25 2012
Comments
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RHP User
13 years ago
In their profile that they dont play alone it's fine. We operate that way and have each other in our friends so they can be checked out too. Also, some couple pics certainly help.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Oh Mrs N I just think it's another one of the pitfalls of online "introductions". Profiles say "athletic" and they turn up with love handles, they say they are "single"yet can only do daytime meets, they say they are six foot yet I tower over them in heels...and single girls suddenly become a couple:0 You just have to move on ..or get busy with the 4 of you;) Minxy
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'm curiousgirl33's husband and we have separate profiles with links and pics of each other in pg
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RHP User
13 years ago
it'd be OK if they do play as a single on either side but if its a cpl/cpl meet one would think it'd be stated that was what they were looking for. and seriously you need to be friends with yourselves??? thats sad
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RHP User
13 years ago
My wife and I both have profiles on here (see jennylee1903) but not a coupes' profile. Jenny started last year. She's bisexual and so was looking for other girls to play with. I don't have a problem with this. She also clearly states on her profile that she would be interested in couples for swinging with both of us. One couple didn't like this and complained to RHP that her profile was really a couple's profile but they saw that she was available to play alone with ladies so ignored the complaint. I opened my profile solely to access the forums. I have no illusions about my chances of pulling any ladies as a married 48 yr old 'guest' member. It does get up Jen's nose when single ladies are not available to play alone. These people should most definitely have a 'couple's' membership.
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RHP User
13 years ago
You're not available for playing alone so you should have a couples profile. Clearly stated down the bottom or not, you will come up on searches where a woman is seeking another woman and they want know they're being led up the garden path until they get to tht point and it pisses them off. Seriously!
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RHP User
13 years ago
I don't get why the need for two profiles? If your a couple then you would expect a couples profile. Even if you both play alone I don't see why this can't all be written down on a couples profile.Playmates I can understand as they are off doing there own thing and just team up to play as a couple but genuine full time couples i just don't get it.Perhaps some one can explain why they do it this way. Dose it have something to do with getting a free or cheaper profile as a single girl? For now I just see it as misleading.Tim
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erotictouch4u
13 years ago
Quoting 'timandjane'Perhaps some one can explain why they do it this way. Dose it have something to do with getting a free or cheaper profile as a single girl? For now I just see it as misleading. It is about the fact that the majority of couples are after single girls. So if they use a single girl's profile to catch a couple then they can try and ease their partner in too once they know you play with couples. The same with single girls profiles advertising for men but then stating in their descriptions that they are a couple and are after females or other couples...WTF ?
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RHP User
13 years ago
We are a couple and I have a single profile for a couple of reasons 1. I seek females to play alone with and figure they will put in searches for woman. I definitely think if I change to a couples profile I would get less interest from females that play alone.2. I manage our profile 99% and use it for forums and chat and my partner had his own but never used it so axed it.3. I don't try and sneak my partner in- I prefer those who want to play with us as a couple and not just looking for an "extra female" it clearly states that we are looking to play as a couple with M, F and couples. I am not seeking couples to play with alone at all though they don't seem to understand when I say "females only" I find this strange as I (and I say I because I do the actual scanning/ screening) am clearly seeking men, females or couples for us together or females only just for me (maybe I need to state whether part of a couple or not!) or maybe they don't read the full profile like relationship status- not unlike single guys.4. the profile I have is as understand for a woman not necessarily single but a woman which is what I am- and one can state their relationship status on the profile which we do clearly as attached and also outline it in the info- which we do.I think ppl just need to take more care to absorb each individual profiles information :)Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
To me the ones trying to sneak their other half in are the ones (regardless of whether they have a couple or a woman profile) that don't put photo's of their man- I find that strange-......like the girl is the bait. We have photo's of us both inc. faces which are in our public gallery so no sneakiness here lol it's all out in the open...... just gotta look and READ. Also must correct my no. 4 point (it's driving me nuts!!!) 4. the profile I have *as I understand it is* damn cut and paste.Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
isnt this the same as couples profiles....that are actually guys on their own? its pretty standard...a ploy to create interest, and to promote some responses..... they flirt with you or send messages, not saying they are a single...........and its not until you are way into a conversation that they reveal that theyve actually been single for about 6 months.....or that the wife doesnt know about the profile.....how about we play on the quiet and not let her know?
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RHP User
13 years ago
I guess i just get put off... They flirt with you and then when you get your hopes up... They throw that in there and its not what i wanted... Or they then 'dont have pics of him available' I get the having a 'woman' profile but being honest about it and adding your partner and then being open about it... but then why not just have a couple's profile... I guess i just dont work like that and thats why it bugs me... mwaaaah! Thanks guys n girls for ya honesty... Now can we all get naked... It's kinda hot here today... :P Mrs N
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's cause it is free to have a single lady profile and get in the chat rooms..lol
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RHP User
13 years ago
Amen mrs N it really is frustrating, especially, when you specifically are looking for "singles"
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DonnaBrett
13 years ago
If there is a 'singles' profile that's what it should be! If they are a couple , have a 'couples' profile. If they play separate on occasions it's fine to have one of each. But a profile showing a single girl who once contacted then states she only plays if her partner is part of it..is dishonest & misleading.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'DonnaBrett'If there is a 'singles' profile that's what it should be! If they are a couple , have a 'couples' profile. If they play separate on occasions it's fine to have one of each. But a profile showing a single girl who once contacted then states she only plays if her partner is part of it..is dishonest & misleading. we agree fully........its deceptive and misleading..... and earns a block from us......
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RHP User
13 years ago
what tim and jane /brettdonna said.. if they arnt honest in the begining...who knows what other tricks they'l use when you meet them. B
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hmmmmmm what to do??? Ours is not misleading in the sense that it clearly states what we are and what we seek straight up in the profile. I just don't want to or have time to manage a couples and a singles profile- that will be sifting twice as much of the single guy messages/ flirts that are just seeking woman- clearly not what I am after!!! Might have to though because in my focus on females I had not considered all the couples that we are missing that only put in searches for couples!!!!!!Bugger Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
be honest....if you're a couple....have a couples profile. not the free females account with the benefits that go with it.... guys/cpls dont get for free what women do... so that sux, and is discriminatory..... if you're a married guy playing on the sly....say so...so we can ignore you...saves time for us in the end....and frustration for everyone. if you're a single...or only play as a single (ONLY) ....... have a singles profile...... dont use the idea of being a 'couple' as bait.....or as a blind to hide behind.... again...be honest.... we've had many 'couples' contact us....but its really a guy...playing solo and secretly..... we cant say loudly enough that this isnt what we seek....its deceptive....... and now the latest trick is 'attached' guys playing 'solo'...but they have a 'playmate' who also wants to join in the fun.....yea good one.... like we'd invite 2 cheats into our lives...lol..
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RHP User
13 years ago
I do play alone but only with other females. If there are other males involved, I want my own hubby along.This is my profile and those are my standards. I don't claim to be unattached in my profile. Everything is clearly stated. I do understand that if a couple finds my profile and reads through to find out I won't play with them in a 3some that they would be annoyed and I am sorry but if I didn't have my own profile, women searching for women wouldn't find me.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I can see how this can become a problem as rhp doesn't give the option for girls to search for other girls that are in a couples profile. So In this situation i see your point.Although this example there is a legitimate reason. I still feel a good portion of the profiles are deceiving for other not so legitimate reasons like the complementary guy thrown in after the bait has worked its magic and the free profile benefits.Tim Quoting 'jennylee1903' I do play alone but only with other females. If there are other males involved, I want my own hubby along.This is my profile and those are my standards. I don't claim to be unattached in my profile. Everything is clearly stated. I do understand that if a couple finds my profile and reads through to find out I won't play with them in a 3some that they would be annoyed and I am sorry but if I didn't have my own profile, women searching for women wouldn't find me.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I guess there are legitimate reasons and RHP isnt completely black and white with profiles... I guess the whole reason i started this was we are finding most 'single' 'women' seem to want to bring their fuck buddy or partner or whatever. Its just frustrating when we have a convo only to find out its a 4some not a 3some... I want to spoil my man sometimes... Not yours... We're all for couples... But not when we're flirting with girls... Thanks for all the replies!! Mwahh!! Mrs N
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RHP User
13 years ago
jennylee I am the same as you- a "woman" looking to play alone with females or with couples/ men with my man.Mike and Shel I am not being dishonest all is clearly stated in my profile as to what the go is. It seems to me you are casting aspersions on open and direct people as if they are the same as those who hide the fact??? One would have more cause to complain about profiles (of any type) not being read and messages sent that are clearly not what they are seeking- which I get a lot of from couples and men! For me though I don't even bother getting annoyed I just direct them to read my profile with a :) So whether someone uses a man, woman or couples profile is of little - no consequence to me- the content of it is.Of course I agree it's inappropriate for woman to conceal the fact they are couple and then drop a bomb later. But what about others who are up front.....A "woman's" profile does *not* at all say single..... it is assumed as so. This limits the different ways in which people (there are 2 different one's in a couple) want to play. Unfortunately it seems lots don't care to read the full profile or accept that inevitably heaps of time is spent with this hit and miss venture and everyone doesn't always fit the mould.What indicates whether someone is attached or not is the relationship status which everyone should check.......Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
I pay for a platinum membership.So in that respect I should be free to utilise the site and it's profile options to best work for me, us and our investment :) on those grounds I am reconsidering having 2 profiles again so that couples seeking couples find me ;) But I still think it's okay for others to do it- it's nothing to get your knickers in a knot.Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
but yes it is deceptive..... in our eyes, we are being duped.....and have been duped time and time again.... by 'couples' with singles profiles....which we never wouldve responded to if we knew that they were attached....and by 'singles' with couples profiles....where the one partner has mysteriously disappeared....chosen to no longer play....or never existed in the first place.............. historical fact m'luv.....its happened time and time again..... in the perhaps 10 years we've been members.......men hide the fact that they are married....even when their wives play as well.......as we have already found.... so they manufacture for themselves an opportunity to play 'on the side' where and when an option arises..... jeesuz....you dont receive the ridiculous amount of mail that we have....and not strike the worst of a site like this,as well as some of the best....the classics include....'the wifes away for a week, i can now host'...when we never knew the guy was attached in the first place...his profile said 'single'....... or the 'couple' local to us....'shes decided to no longer play.....but i am free mon to fri daytimes'........but the truth is that they had never played....she never knew of the profile....or his desire to play in the first place...... one we chatted to....and swapped pics, texts and emails with....assured us he was single......his profile stated 'single....no kids.....no baggage', and that he was a shift worker.....all was looking good, until he shared with us a photo i had seen........on facebook...on the profile of my married, father of 3 cousin.........who i had not seen, for near to 2 decades.......needless to say....contact stopped.......... or what about the single guys.....who suddenly and miraculously pull a wife or girlfriend out of their hat....and ask if they can come along too.....when theyve never said 'boo' about having anyone at any stage of contact? we dont want to read a profile that says.....'but i play alone'......or that they have 'partners permission'..........we dont see 'attached' men as an attractive option.....and doubt the veracity of the statements and assertions contained in these profiles.... and if we saw and read your profile.... would absolutely arrive at the very same conclusions.............if you are attached....and play together...and seperately.... your profile should be that of a couple....as thats primarily what you are..you are part of a couple...but qualify it with content that alludes to you playing solo.....if and when the desire, or inclination occurs...........simple isnt it? how can that not have the tones of both honesty......and openness???????
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RHP User
13 years ago
well ladies if you are allowed to play alone and looking for ladies to play with why not then attend our ladies only night on the 8th March you will for sure find some fun and have a lovely lady play time.Shameless promoting i know, but it seems a lot of the single ladies have single lady profiles to find ladies to play with , and as they say they are wanting to play alone and not as a couple as that is why they have single lady profiles....well i have the night for you, lets see if you all attend..lolAnd i must say one thing ladies that have a guest user profile, when you register to attend parties no one can see that you have registered and they have no idea you have, as you have to be a paid member to be seen when you register for a party under the events section. Sucks i know but just informing you all , so if you have registered to attend a party that says they will invite you if selected and you dont get a message , that is why.Leesa xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
Is one of the issues the fact that people are NOT taking the time to a actually read the profiles? ( regardless of the single / couple status) When coming a across a profile that perhaps appears to be not what it claimed to be.. I move to the next :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
..........we read the profiles....but its obvious that these people dont read ours....if we see someone we think is part way what we seek.....we read every damned word on their profile...and follow the links if they've posted to the forums.... one thing thats done very well here....is research........ its a shame others dont do the same....
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RHP User
13 years ago
It must be wonderful to live in a world that's clearly black and white. I envy you. Unfortunately, the rest of us live in the real world. You haven't addressed Jen's last point. "...If I didn't have my own profile, women searching for women wouldn't find me." It's a valid point that highlights a grey area, but that's the real world for you. Shades of grey.
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RHP User
13 years ago
that no matter what kind of profile you have...someone is gonna get upsetcoz you dont fit the criteria they have in their heads that you SHOULD fit.Meh. Life is too shortBJ
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RHP User
13 years ago
Because chucking in somewhere on a couples profile that I play solo (F only) will most likely never be seen seeing as though like you say and I agree a lot don't read it and it will never come up on searches for woman alone seeking woman alone (whatever their profile is couple or woman)It is *not* deceptive IMO nowhere does it say it's a "single" woman's profile again it's assumed by some- probably most!!! Why would there be the option to specify relationship status as attached or otherwise if was unacceptable to do so on that profile......that makes no sense at all, just saying.Cass xxxI wonder what single men think about it as well as other couples??? (when it is all clearly spelled out in the info and there are pics of both)
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RHP User
13 years ago
I agree with Multipes.... and i really dont see what the fuss is about..... even if it is a" woman" profile, in the details you can see whether they have listed as "single" "attached" "seperated" etc, so one can pick or choose straight away....if they have listed "attached" (then you know if there is a possibility of someone else besides the woman being involved unless specifically stated in the profile) and you are not into it. drop it and move on. Now if someone has listed "single" and comes back after email exchanges and says they are a couple/ or want a male friend to join in, then they are clearly misleading ppl which is no different to single guys pretending to be couples or couples looking for men turning out to be the males of the couple looking for bi play only. At the end of the day, i believe(my opinion, no judgement) ppl usethis site ( and rightly so, ) in a way to suit thier convinience and what they are looking for..as long as they ar honest and upfront, there shouldnt be an issue, if they are not then that is a case for ppl not being honest, not what type of profile they have.. (Also, if RHP has given a provision for single girls to join in free n chat, then by all means, they should use it if they want, its a feature of the website, not the fault of the person who is using it) All about individuals, expectations, honest and open communication...if those are present and if ppl actually read profiles in detail, there should not be too much dissappointment for anyone.
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RHP User
13 years ago
...it can be reported to RHP and they will alter the profile accordingly. As I stated, I was reported to RHP, they investigated, found that the primary purpose of my profile was for a woman (me) to meet other women and cleared me. Now if the rule makers have said that I'm abiding by the rules, don't you people feel even a little arrogant in proclaiming that I'm not.
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RHP User
13 years ago
+2
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RHP User
13 years ago
so what exactly does that mean for you two, does it mean that you are there to play alone because you have single profiles? or does it mean that you are individuals who play as a couple and by having single profiles, you will get better results? or do yous also have a couple profile that says you are a couple but play alone? for me when i go on the search for a couple, id like to click on username and it says exactly that, or if im looking foe individuals then the profile would read single, there are alot of users on RHP and it can be quite annoying clicking on user only to find that they are not in the right category, im not saying that users should be in the right category, im just saying that sometimes its wasted time for mecheersFun
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RHP User
13 years ago
I can't please everyone FOOD FOR THOUGHT.........The same futile point could be argued if I had a "couples" profile and said we seek couples and females- and somewhere in my info I say "females just for play alone with me". Some chick will "crack the shits" because she was seeking couples for MFF in her search and wasted time blah blah blah.Maybe they should have another category- like the people or person category- it's a lucky dip :)The only reason it bothers some couples is because it doesn't match *their* criteria and time is precious. They are generally looking for a F or 2 to play with Mrs & Mr and attached girls are less likely to play that way- so they don't like it. That seems really self centred and narrow to me........there are others that are searching for more than MFMF and MFF and those like us that legitimately play separately. I bet that most that seek a F for the mrs alone would not mind my profile choice same as a single chick and it would be silly for a couple to miss out on the opportunity to be with a girl that legitimately plays separate with couple's because she is attached with a "woman's profile. I will most likely in the future.We ALL waste time here it is part of the process and about the only thing one should expect on here :)I am looking for a bunch of things and only have time to manage 1 profile- not even lol.Couples and males and females for us both and also females alone (whether attached or not as long as she is solo)If that attached woman has a "woman's" profile and is seeking whatever with and/or without her partner.....that does *not* bother me. I am like yes that's for me or no not for me - next - no need to get annoyed what a waste of nrg!!! I afford the same courtesy to the multitudes of ppl that msg me and are not what I seek and to profiles that do not state what they are or are not into and I have to waste time "asking"At least mine is thorough and includes face pics AND I won't message you if I am not what you seek. There I save people lots of time :PThe reality is there are lots of variables and only a few of ways to express it and it is not all B & W. Some bad apples do the misleading thing like in the question- concealing facts and being dishonest like ppl do in all areas of this site........that shouldn't denigrate the one's being direct...... How thoroughly sententious and on those high moral grounds no one should have a profile at all in fact might as well axe the whole concept and that is ridiculous.MrsPP you say it's not what you expect to find when you search- with respect, I think that is the problem right there......too much expectation at the expense of exploration and acceptance. I expect to find nothing in particular when I search and accept what fits and what doesn't and it's a bonus if they are clear about themselves. :)Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
MMmm...its swamped with females who are atttached (sometimes its a safety thing to have theirpartner attend maybe 1st ttime)That doesn't mean they aren't looking for singles and not couplesPerhaps its a case of a single profile to attract what your seekingNot worth stressing over, just read the profile and if its not for you... move on
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abcplus1
13 years ago
We had the same dilemma, I can play on my own with other females, but it is not my preference. Do I spend double on two profiles? Used to list as an married female, clearly stating what I was and what I was looking for, but that brought complaints to the site from certain males who felt I was in the wrong. Ended up changing the profile to couple, so as said before I won't be found in searches by women looking for women.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I think its better if you have your own girls profile to find other girls to play alone with you. Then just keep it as a girl seeking (whatever) profile and not try combine it with mention of your partner to attract couples as its the wrong kind of profile to use for couples.If the couples side of things isn't worth the small investment in time for yourself or your partner to manage a couples profile then you really should you be seeking couples in the first place.Tim
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's a bit like when you go into a Chinese restaurant and at the back of the menu they say "we also do Italian & Mexican" its like WTF? Tim
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RHP User
13 years ago
I whole heartedly agree single profiles should be for singles only
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RHP User
13 years ago
And I agree with most of them. Originally my husband came on here solo to find a playmate with my permission (paying the 3mth fee). Then when I saw the uphill mountain he had to climb just to find a FB I thought I thought I'd come here and have a look to see if I could find a girl for us through my own profile clearly stating that we are a couple. After being on for a short time we decided to extend our 'want' to include couples. Now my contract was only for a month so once it runs out we will change my husband's profile to couple and only run the one. Dont assume and make judgements before you have all the facts, different people's circumstances dictate different approaches to situations.
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RHP User
13 years ago
you're a couple arent you? you should have a couples profile only... we strike males with profiles like yours....and wipe them without hesitation. we seek couples...or singles...not attached people who play alone, openly, or slyly. RHP needs a few new profile categories. ones that say "attached male" and "attached female". which is what you are.....so those of us who dont wish to meet you...know whether its worth our time to even open your profile...oh, and while they are there...perhaps they could piss the 'ask me' option off as well.....as we dont ask, and wont ask, because if you cant be up front about your relationship status.....we dont want to know you... is it deceitful that people (singles, marrieds and otherwise) present themselves as other than they are? absolutely. theres a certain lack of honesty when people do this, which means a certain lack of respect. if we search for a woman, thats what we want....not one with a hidden partner...because shes really a couple... justify all you like....but know that some of us will always see it as being less than forthcoming and less than honest.... it wouldnt matter how close to our ideal you might be....presented as you are...you wouldnt even get a look in...and thats an absolute truth.....of the 20 or 30 flirts a day we receive, and the dozen or more messages....theres usually only a handful who present themselves as they really are...most are hiding one thing or another....and shit..sometimes it takes an hour or more to read thru the profiles of all who have contacted us...what a waste of time when so many turn out not to be even close........ Shel had a profile here, as a single....looking only for single women....she gave up...as the ones she liked, were invariably attached..and like me, for the same reasons as my own....she wont go there........ I had a profile, as a single...and when i met someone, and we began to spend time together, our single profiles became a couples profile, even though we didnt live together. if you are the male or female half of a couple who seeks to play, together or alone, your couples profile should reflect that. to have a singles profile is deceitful and a misrepresentation of who you are. and thats fact, not fiction...
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luvlust
13 years ago
We are of the opinion that anyone listing as a single female then wanting "a couple or female to play with me and my man" is hiding something. We have visions of a grossly overweight and unkempt male lurking in the background. If you want someone to play with you as a couple then list as a couple. If I wanted to buy a car would I look for one at a motorcycle dealership?It's not hard, if you want to play as a couple then advertise as a couple.
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RHP User
13 years ago
As a man or woman, you cant change the profile type to couple, we've looked for a way plenty of times but find no function for it. Not forking out $ for three accounts!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Im a married guy here on the sly, I say so upfront and invite people to block me so that no one is wasting each others time. Everyone has their reasons for being on this site.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I can see the problem with couples using a single profile when really they are looking for contact together. It seems a bit precious though, to have a problem with attached people using a single profile when they are up for fun without their partner along, particularly when their profile is clear from the start.
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's understandable being annoyed by couples being cheap or deceitful and looking for fun together through a single profile. Its ridiculously precious, however, to get miffed at attached people who use a single profile to look for single fun - especially when the profile they use is clear and honest from the start. As for putting those people in same category as married men pretending to be single in order to cheat on the sly - come on, seriously?
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's understandable being annoyed by couples being cheap or deceitful and looking for fun together through a single profile. Its ridiculously precious, however, to get miffed at attached people who use a single profile to look for single fun - especially when the profile they use is clear and honest from the start. As for putting those people in same category as married men pretending to be single in order to cheat on the sly - come on, seriously?
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RHP User
13 years ago
luvlust, who have we decieved? How have we even attempted to decieve? mikeandshel (most probably Mike), your arrogance in this matter is mind boggling. Who are you, of such importance, that your time is more valuable than another's. Other couples don't have a problem with us. If you are unhappy with RHP's rules, you are free to start your own little site where you will be free to enforce your rules on others. Good luck.
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RHP User
13 years ago
...The single profile plays as a single person, and doesn't offer his or her partner to join in. I don't mean that you have to lie about the fact that you have a partner, but I also don't think you necessarily need to state that you are in a relationship (if it's just a one nighter). I think it's fair to tell the truth if asked though. I'm sure the reason for playing alone (when in a relationship) is to experience what comes with one on ones with other people. I do think its unfair if you pretend to be single, meet up with someone, and allow that person to believe it could become more than just sex. Couples can state that they play together, or alone. And that's fine. I am becoming more aware of 'couple' profiles, that say the girl is happy for the guy to play alone. I find it hard to believe a female would give her partner her blessing for him to play with other girls/couples without her, as she's just not into it at the moment. I'm just not convinced.
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RHP User
13 years ago
how many messages and flirts do you receive? daily? is it dozens? it usually is for us.and more, if we change pics. from 'singles' who cant read our profile. from attached who cant read, from the male half of a couple, who wants to play on the sly.......etc etc Shel.
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RHP User
13 years ago
there is no 'arrogance' in what we posted. just honesty. and vented frustration. if you dont like our thoughts jensman, thats fine.... we can deal with that....
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RHP User
13 years ago
TimandJane- my partners face pic is public same as mine and more in pg.Restaurants do that to provide options to cater for a wider cross section of the masses (majority and minority groups.)A great analogy for the myopic view points posted. Just change the cuisine to types of play and the restaurant a profile choice.They are associated by correlation; like pizza /kebab (regional), Chinese/Vietnamese/Thai (Asian) or adding the cuisine of the country. Yes some (like Mike and Shel) may go to the restaurant expecting one type of cuisine and therefore find it hard to appreciate that others especially when there is more than one taste in the party differ and have every right to be catered for. It needs to fit together on the limited menu space, in the one place......Oh those poor diners that have to waste time scanning through dishes that are not to their taste! (sarcasm)If you focus on more than yourself, your tastes and expectations/ limitations it's easy to accept multi cultural cuisine.
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RHP User
13 years ago
My partner and I swing together and have an open relationship. We play separate and together openly and honestly- It is bigoted to tar everyone with the same brush. Regardless of whether some or most do. If you think no one should play alone when attached because they might be liars then you might as well block all profiles because there is a chance that they are an overweight, unattractive old bloke. More importantly, there is no guarantee a couple with a couples profile that say they only play together- actually do so and not fuck the neighbour on the sly so you might as well search for asexual people- oh wait they could be lying too. We would be happy to meet first as a couple and verify that we are a couple and what our go is in person- you can't get more honest than that. I will add that to my profile tonight for the generalising doubters or maybe I wont because narrow minded people are not the sort of people we want to know. Anyone with any profile saying anything could be liars so if you can't give the benefit of doubt- you might as well just do yourselves......so to speak :) (I am playing but no doubt you will block me- I wouldn't bother checking)Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
Often people want a variety of things and someone searching for a woman solo (not necessarily single) is often happy to consider a couple because they also seek them too. I have never had a single complaint from a looker or a lookee. Luvlust metaphorically speaking you may go to that dealer looking for a bike and if you are open to it be quite taken by the un-thought of prospects of a 4WD- so much more adventurous and you can share with more people. ;) or reconsider your priorities and go for that luxury car that sure it has more seats in it but is a really classy ride or a classic that wasn't what you had in mind but blows your mind every time you start it up despite the fact it uses more fuel. Or you may find that well suited motorbike perhaps one that's on the market and isn't taken or one that just as or better suited that you can loan for a bit....attached women rarely stalk or expect more lol Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
no need to block...you must understand that these are all opions and ideas...and yea, arguments.... but as in face to face relationships...nothing is written in blood....we seek things that you may not always agree with...but isnt that part of being an adult? challenging each other is healthy...sharing and disagreeing....is healthy.... being controversial, or choosing to be agreeable.....is healthy...and adult...its all good....so long as everyones having a good time, lol, isnt that really all that matters?
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RHP User
13 years ago
I don't really get what you mean? RE; "but as in face to face relationships...nothing is written in blood"Are you saying that in reality what you say on here can be different??? Wouldn't that realisation make you more open minded in general and less B&W with massive sweeping statements? Does that actually mean you can change your point of view, :P (in the nicest possible way) it seems set in stone to me. Hmmm am I safe to assume as you made no reference to the points I gave you in my last post that you don't disagree?Me disagree with what you seek no- I respect peoples choices whatever profile, whether they seek attached, unattached whether they are attached unattached (even married without permission) or whether they fit "the mould" or not.Everyone has there reasons and needs and I would even go as far as accepting that people have fake hot profiles just to chat whether they are members or guests, yes it's completely deceptive but it's human and people have needs. I would prefer not to play with cheaters or liars I want friends- not secrets so I implement my own safe guards as do you- but I don't go so far as to dismiss a whole group of people just because they might be lying. Does that mean I disagree with your choice for you to do that *no* you have your reasons/ needs as well- though I think it's intolerant and unfairly judgemental. Each to their own.Why wouldn't you block me if you view me as deceitful didn't you say that's what you do???Cass :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Of course that's fine for it not interest to you but would you condemn someone for trying to get the widest cross section of exposure? If the profile is clear, open, honest- I don't see the problem especially with pics of both and not trying to sneak them in down the track. I spend too much time on here already and whilst I love it I found that when I did have a single profile woman searching woman only that I was getting heaps of double messages from men and hardly any from girls.My partner is away 1/2 the year and I like girlfriends but also like them to be open to ganging up on my man when he is home but only if they want to and it is not a condition and I am upfront in the first contact.What is being said about suggesting a change in play dynamic being sneaky and deceptive insinuates it's a faux pas So woudn't it be wrong to ask any F found as a couple seeking F to play alone or to ask any girl I have found through a F seeking F profile to have a 3sum as well as. Which is silly we are all adult and have ever changing and varying tastes.This way I get more from girls mostly attached that want both of us, as well as attached plays solo and single F. I have not got time to manage both nor do I want to pay for both. When I search for an individual woman and find she is part of couple yet plays alone that's fine with me. and if we seek MFF and she doesn't play with other men it does not bother me. Of course back to the OP if she then wasn't upfront and later tried to oblige me her male I would decline.
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RHP User
13 years ago
will go change it, thanks ;)
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RHP User
13 years ago
but it'still up to the discretion of the rhp admin. We've done all that they tell you to do, now we just have to wait until they change it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I would decline- However, I certainly wouldn't get my silky knickers in a knot about it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
No knickers = no knots- that's how I simplify my convoluted discourse. Cass
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RHP User
13 years ago
nothing is set in stone. ever. a good thing about being an adult...is being able to understand that you've over stepped the mark (again) and taken things too far... we are adaptable..even if it sometimes seems otherwise.....and have to admit...that writing these danmned things at 4am, may not always be the wisest move...lol.. we are frustrated by the flirts and message from people who are other than what they present themselves as... people say...'well read the profile, it says if someones attached or not"..........only it doesnt...or it says 'ask me'... and the flirts and messages from people who are so outside of what we seek..... married guys from perth, 20 years olds from sydney, the male half of a swing couple from the goldie....its frustrating, and its wearing the novelty of play very thin indeed...i was pissed with this, and pissed with something that was going on in another forum topic, and absolutely annoyed with another guy sending us messages at all hours of the night....just to be vindictive........ and vented... inappropriately tho. back on topic, but hopefully a little less 'arrogantly' as someone else said...lol... we dont see that theres a whole lot of honesty in some peoples profiles...and would prefer it if there was just a bit more. that people could put 'attached' instead of 'ask me' or 'single', when there is a partner in the background somewhere. we put ourselves out there..as you do Cass, and as many many others do....in the hope that we can find someone or something ideal, and have a little fun with him/her/them..... and its difficult enough, without it being made even more so...by people who deliberately set out to conceal their real 'status', and attempt to gain access to the fun, through deception...so that said, i'll wind back my indignation...and arguments... and apologise for showing an angry and frustrated side, it wasnt very adult at all.
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RHP User
13 years ago
It sounds too time consuming and I figure that sure some just looking for unattached F may lose a bit of time clicking it on and clicking it off but that time lost would then be counter balanced by the fact that I wont send them a msg asking those same couples to join me in what they are not seeking- which I get daily at least.Still think I will be missing out on couples searching for couples- I am still Mrs_PeachyPear"Why bother having profile types if they mean nothing?"To narrow down searches for the masses but to me that doesn't mean there can be room to accommodate double campers (so to speak) if there are so many then perhaps RHP should have an attached/open relationship profile.
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RHP User
13 years ago
*Can't* be room...... damn it!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Would solve a lot of frustration and time wasting same as a forum profile and maybe a chat/pic (VR only) profile too :)Misunderstand my smileyI just noticed a lack of emoticons in my posts....whoops. In all topics I try and stay objective and am pretty unemotional and matter of fact when I get into analysing the intricacies of an issue..... though I can't help enjoying it ;)Never again will I leave my undies on to post on a forum!!!Sincerely,Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
My profile says im a female seeking a female, but I state that im in a relationship very clearly... now this isnt a way of a couple seeking another girl to join in! I have it like this because Im lucky enough to be in the position that my partner understands my sexuality and needs and does not expect to be involved. It does frustrate me however when Ive spent time getting to know a female through here then she drops the bombshell she has a partner and he wants in wheather to watch (URGH) or to participate.. now thats not fair and because of that I now make it one of my first questions when I do get contacted to ask if they have a partner. I think the key to it all is honesty stright up.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Yes, I'm part of a couple and I've opened a solo profile but that was only so that I could access these forums. I don't actively seek contacts for liasons. Still, if someone were to search for a male and come across me, they would be wasting their time. This seems to be the issue for a few of you, the wasted time. It seems you would like the rules changed to reflect 1. Do away with the relationship status on profiles and have all married parties on a couples profile and only single persons on a single profile. 2. Allow couples to play seperately but devise a new (and innately complicated) search to find them. 3. Only allow actively participating members. Does this sum things up adequately?
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RogueGeek
13 years ago
For exactly that reason stated above: so that women searching for women can find me.My couples profile is very clear about who/what I'm looking for, but I find many solo females wont even read or reply to a message from the couples profile (I even tried the subject line: from the female half ONLY).So I started the second profile as an experiment to see if things are different, and they are. It is much easier to get other women to respond, even though what I say in each profile is almost identical, and I am very clear in my solo profile that I am married.Cheers,MS
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RHP User
13 years ago
I do hope someone will respond to my three summarised conclusions.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I dont think i ever quite expected to stir the hornets nest up that i did... Whoooops... :P Thank you all for your feedback and banter, It's been quite entertaining to watch. ;) I think mostly my point has been a little missed tho. I dont have an issue with 'attached' people having single profiles but more the ones that pretend to be single, or play along that they'll happily join myself and my man to then at the last minute drop in that they want to bring their BF or Fuck Buddy. I mean i am on here as a couple, But we both play alone. But if we are messaging for that its basically the first thing we are clear about. Dont contact us 'as a single' and then when it comes time to organise a meet up drop in the 4th person. We're all for fucking both of you. But not getting fucked around... :D Mwah!! K
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RHP User
13 years ago
You have been more accepting of other peoples opinions and situations than others. We "needsomemore" like you.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Perhaps they finally realised that there is no such thing as a single's profile here and they've been wrong the whole time. When you join, you get to choose between man, woman, couple, group etc. no singles. Yay, we win.
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RHP User
13 years ago
We agreed with your post- a simple voice of reason. Is'nt FUN the primary reason ppl are members on this site- seems that a lot of ppl here ( in these forums) are too busy bitching to remember that, why focus on only negatives then share it with the rest of us? topic after topic the same ppl seem to constantly try to pass judgements on others - thats what really makes our heads spin. On here use your common sense read all profiles thoroughly and treat each one on its own individual merits, you'll meet both good and bad ppl here thats the one and only certainty, but the great ones make it worth taking the chance. Everyones personal relationship status and situations are different so accept it, who are we to cast judgements on anyone else? we're all different and attracted to different things - and we should all be free to make connections and choices without a diatribe of whats presumed ethical and whats not by a loud outspoken minority . Thread after thread the same ppl try to chastise and argue with all and sundry- spewing tales of how they were hurt or taken advantage of previously, Should ppl in glass houses really throw stones? Your still on here so are you really that victimised? Maybe you should be addressing the ppl who were responsible for your anguish and not the rest of us - accept that you made a shitty choice and move on, you make it hard to sympathise with. Possibly ask for a hug and not a fuck in future- just a thought. We did'nt want to single anyone out and invite the endless idiotic replies that usually follows posting. Single , Attached or Married this site is most certainly not black and white, there are so are many shades of grey, and thats what makes it so much fun for us.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I have had a different experience....I have only been on this site for two weeks and I say in my profile that I am looking for couples ..a number of times I have started chatting only to find out its actually a married man playing alone....not a couple!!!.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mrs_PeachyPear' On the flipside, is it that the woman becomes nervous at the last minute and wants company for reassurance? I can imagine it could be quite daunting for them. Have you ever asked? There's bound to be different reasons too I guess.Hugs... Mrs P This we have asked, Only to be told "thats the only way we play" If its a simple case of security (coz i know i would feel safer with my man there if i was playing around) But thats something i would be upfront about.... If we approach a couple its as a couple, I will only play alone with women and i have been fairly upfront about that, We're all adults here and maybe sometimes we should act that way? Wow that sounded harsh... ooops. hehehe. We just want to have fun...
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's 100% wrong and deceptive for anyone to lead someone in one direction and then pull a swifty last minute!!!!Quoting 'sexynewcpl' We agreed with your post- a simple voice of reason. Is'nt FUN the primary reason ppl are members on this site- seems that a lot of ppl here ( in these forums) are too busy bitching to remember that, why focus on only negatives then share it with the rest of us? topic after topic the same ppl seem to constantly try to pass judgements on others - thats what really makes our heads spin. On here use your common sense read all profiles thoroughly and treat each one on its own individual merits, you'll meet both good and bad ppl here thats the one and only certainty, but the great ones make it worth taking the chance. Everyones personal relationship status and situations are different so accept it, who are we to cast judgements on anyone else? we're all different and attracted to different things - and we should all be free to make connections and choices without a diatribe of whats presumed ethical and whats not by a loud outspoken minority . Thread after thread the same ppl try to chastise and argue with all and sundry- spewing tales of how they were hurt or taken advantage of previously, Should ppl in glass houses really throw stones? Your still on here so are you really that victimised? Maybe you should be addressing the ppl who were responsible for your anguish and not the rest of us - accept that you made a shitty choice and move on, you make it hard to sympathise with. Possibly ask for a hug and not a fuck in future- just a thought. We did'nt want to single anyone out and invite the endless idiotic replies that usually follows posting. Single , Attached or Married this site is most certainly not black and white, there are so are many shades of grey, and thats what makes it so much fun for us. That's a whole bunch of what I say :)Mrs_P I reckon if they get nervous they should just suck it up or cancel not surprise propose their partner.
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RHP User
13 years ago
...that some of the posts complained of time wasted going through profiles only to find that the person is not available to play alone. That would also translate to your own profile being a waste of a person's time as you don't play at all. I would have thought you would have picked up on this and defended peoples right to use their profiles for their own purposes with more vigor.
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RHP User
13 years ago
The last minute proposition would be the darker shade of grey opposed to black being just turn up with him unannounced bahahaha. It's inconsiderate to do either and I would think it more logical to discuss the possibility looooooooooooong before the last minute which would be the lighter shade of grey. Opposed to white which would be having it all spelled out on her profile :)On 2nd thoughts Mrs P,I suppose there is no harm in asking- The other girl could go sure bring him along, no probs. Only if it truly is jitters and they did not premeditate the situation. It is just really something best discussed in the beginning and along the way if she lacks confidence then have it in her profile so you don't leave it up to the other girl to give her motives the benefit of doubt.There I think that is pretty damn objective and comprehensive, opposed to the last.Cass xxx
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RHP User
13 years ago
Not your thread? The 'thread' doesn't belong to anyone and topics are often raised through out that were not dealt with in the OP while still remaining relaent to the topic. The thread, while not initiated by you, is as much yours as it is anyone else's who posted within it.I don't feel entitled to 'ownership' of any thread that I instigate and with all due respect to needsomemore, I don't believe she/they own this one. I was just pointing out that one of the gripes subsequently raised, was at odds with your own usage of the site and was surprised that you didn't pick up on it.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I forgot we were on Jen's profile. jensman.
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RHP User
13 years ago
i'm single but what if i want to enjoy a caple and i not doing it because i'm scared
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RHP User
13 years ago
Preaching to the converted here, remember.
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RHP User
13 years ago
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RHP User
13 years ago
I guess i just get put off... They flirt with you and then when you get your hopes up... They throw that in there and its not what i wanted... Or they then 'dont have pics of him available' We TOTALLY agree to being put off by 'single' girls. Admittedly this profile began as 'Nomineee' as it was my profile. It was mine for a long time however at a point that my partner and I committed to each other I did not hesitate to have RHP change it to a couple profile. (he also changed his profile to say he had a partner too) We decided it was the honest thing to do (and it simply made it easier than saying "blah blah my partner is... check him out"- I spose that him having a single profile was one up on most here...) As far as we are concerned, if the profile isnt changed or updated to reflect a proper situation accordingly, they have something to hide. Whether that be that they are 'uncommitted', they want to hook people before pulling out some secret, the guy isnt the best looking or whatever... We aren't interested. We are real and upfront- is it too much to expect the same? And- at such point that we arent a couple any more (thought has to be had), its very simple to change this back to being a single girl profile.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Mrs_PeachyPear' Quoting 'Mrs_PeachyPear' Couples on single profiles are not. That was rather cryptic. I'm hoping you weren't referring to me and my good lady wife. It seems you still haven't accepted that there is no such thing as a profile categorised as 'single' on RHP. Your own title as "Mrs." seems to indicate that you are a married woman and yet you don't feel the need to take out a couple's profile and nor should you. I am here for the same reason as yourself, to avail myself to these forums. I don't seek contact with anyone. My wife actively seeks playmates and she has a "woman's" profile as she is a woman. Everything in order and above board. We have every bit as much right to be here as yourself.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I've become a bit defensive, I know. That can happen when you've been under fire on a subject for as long as this. It's going to help when people start acknowledging that there is no such thing here as a "single's" profile.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I just don't think we need one. Perhaps when we've finished building and have more time to play, I might approach it more seriously and open one up.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Nomindizzy' I guess i just get put off... They flirt with you and then when you get your hopes up... They throw that in there and its not what i wanted... Or they then 'dont have pics of him available' We TOTALLY agree to being put off by 'single' girls. Admittedly this profile began as 'Nomineee' as it was my profile. It was mine for a long time however at a point that my partner and I committed to each other I did not hesitate to have RHP change it to a couple profile. (he also changed his profile to say he had a partner too) We decided it was the honest thing to do (and it simply made it easier than saying "blah blah my partner is... check him out"- I spose that him having a single profile was one up on most here...) As far as we are concerned, if the profile isnt changed or updated to reflect a proper situation accordingly, they have something to hide. Whether that be that they are 'uncommitted', they want to hook people before pulling out some secret, the guy isnt the best looking or whatever... We aren't interested. We are real and upfront- is it too much to expect the same? And- at such point that we arent a couple any more (thought has to be had), its very simple to change this back to being a single girl profile.Um there are plenty of couples with couples profiles that are hiding both of them or the male half honesty is not dependent on the profile type it is the user of any of the profile options. My woman's profile stating I am attached is very open and clear and honest with public face shots of us both.I have requested a change to a couples profile and edited the info as our agenda has changed to couples seeking couples and *NOT* because I disagree with a couple using either a female of male profile it's all goo d for me and even better if each do there parts- people are clear and honest and upfront in their profile and the people viewing them actually read the info provided.Cass xxx
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