F47

Critique my dick pic with love

November 11 2014

So, following on from the many discussions on here about dick pics I thought I'd post this. It's part of an article written by the woman who runs the Critique My Dick Pic tumblr, and if you're a guy who has or wants to have dick pics on their profile then you really should check it out. Don't worry, there's no body or cock shaming or judgement whatsoever, all of her advice relates only to the qualities of the picture. "In September this year, I woke up to an excellent dick pic. I can remember it quite clearly: it was a low-lit shot of a firmly-erect penis straining sideways through boxers, and I was thrilled to receive it: it was subtle, it wasn’t unsolicited, and it was unusually sexy for a Snapchatted cock shot. It also changed the trajectory of my life. I don’t want to send anyone’s ego out of the stratosphere by saying that, but it’s not really an exaggeration: after I received that photo, invigorated and shot through with dopamine, I tweeted about how rare and encouraging it was to receive a decent dick pic. That sparked an online conversation about how to improve the dismal state of dick pics—I would classify them as generally dull, artless and unsolicited—and that lead to my rise as the Internet’s most beloved dick pic critic. I started Critique My Dick Pic (Not! Safe! For! Work!, and that goes for all links throughout) that same day; a blog with a simple, self-explanatory premise: men (and other people with penises) send me pictures of their dicks, and I critique them with love. “With love” refers to my policy of being neutral about the size of someone’s dick and refusing to shame sender’s bodies, but it’s not about being saccharine or coddling: I don’t mince my words when someone sends me a thoughtless, lazy shot (although I do still try to be somewhat encouraging and constructive). The fact that I don’t critique actual dicks is difficult to fully communicate to men: I still get dozens of emails asking me for private dick reviews, and requests to describe the “perfect penis." That’s pointless to me, and I’m never going to do it. Just imagine it: imagine, for example, if I decided that the perfect dick is shaped like a coke can, and it’s uncircumcised, and it has visible veins (but not too many), and it’s rock hard and dead straight. Where does that leave people with thin dicks? Veiny dicks? Dicks that veer to one side? Are they supposed to feel shitty and miserable about a body part they can’t change because of the idiosyncratic ideals of some woman from New Zealand they were never going to fuck anyway? It’s nonsense. I find the idea of a “perfect dick” reductive and insidious, and I often have to underline the fact that I’m not here to critique dicks, I’m here to critique dick pics. The obvious question, then, is what makes a good dick pic? I’m often asked this, and I consistently repeat a few key tips: don’t send a log. Realize the power of your hands to transform a dick pic from ordinary to wettie-inducing. Pay attention to the background and setting of your picture, and understand how off-putting a visible pile of dirty laundry or extremely mundane collection of shower gels can be. Be aware that even a very small amount of thought and consideration for the desires of your receiver will set you apart from most dick pic senders, and take advantage of that by putting more than three second’s thought into the pose, composition and lighting of your picture. Having said that, though, it’s difficult to prescribe an ideal dick pic. Some of the most memorable pictures I’ve received I never saw coming. I wouldn’t have thought to recommend dusting your half-naked body with bone fragments, for example. All in all, Critique My Dick Pic is proving to be an extremely positive and humbling project. It’s fun and light, but it’s also confirmed to me just how fragile men are; how crumblingly insecure and self-conscious so many of them are about their bodies. That’s very human and understandable, and it’s a terrain with which most women are familiar, but men in particular are exhorted to grin and bear their body issues rather than talk about them. Perhaps that’s why they’ve responded so openly to my project; an anonymous outlet for them to share their deepest vulnerabilities (and to swing their dicks around). It’s very humbling to be put in a trusted position like that, and even though I have a pull-no-punches approach to reviewing, I try to be careful with people’s feelings. Fundamentally, I’m doing this project to help people—senders and receivers alike. I want to rid the world of boring, artless dick pics, and I want to get everybody on board with that."

Comments

RHP User

10 years ago

you have to work with what you have got. Maybe we should have a penis origami month where the only cock shots allowed are where penises are transformed into works of art.

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kufs2

10 years ago

Origami was not a good idea...I just tried to fold my penis into a swan...and I think I've broken it!

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RHP User

10 years ago

If only the men who need to read this actually would. Can we nominate good dick pics here?

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6exxy

10 years ago

Ha ha ha naughty naughty lmao

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Circe

10 years ago

Not!! I'm so busy but have wasted a good hour perving dammit!

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inspirit

10 years ago

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RHP User

10 years ago

I did send a message to a guy once, quite awhile ago, that I knew I would never see ... Just to compliment him in his dick photo ... He was surprised but thankful ... Think I made his day :) - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

10 years ago

Puppetry of the penis?I'll be back...

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Bazingal

10 years ago

I love this site and like MissBB have spent a lot of time perving 😉 - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

10 years ago

No pics of my man hood here as I feel it's better to find out about my cocks style first hand/mouth/pussy or even bottom if you like that thing :)

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RHP User

10 years ago

Have we really become so obsessed with ourselves and self-absorbed that we need strangers to rate our cocks? Go out and make the world a better place! Stop skulking in yer bedrooms. Cocks are beautifully weird. Some are large, thick, curved, bell-ended, veiny whatever! Most do the job.

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RHP User

10 years ago

Quoting 'used2it' Have we really become so obsessed with ourselves and self-absorbed that we need strangers to rate our cocks? Go out and make the world a better place! Stop skulking in yer bedrooms. Cocks are beautifully weird. Some are large, thick, curved, bell-ended, veiny whatever! Most do the job. she's not rating cocks (which she makes clear in her article which it seems you didn't read), and also I think she and most other people would realise that it's not something to be taken too seriously. Sure making the world a better place is great and noble and all that, but does it mean that people can only focus on that, and they can't ever have any fun or take part in / do anything that's frivolous and just for fun? I certainly don't think so. And anyway, I personally think the world would be a better place if guys took good cock shots

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RHP User

10 years ago

It's more a photography lesson than a cock critique, quite good but three pages were enough. I like my cock, it has served me well, I have some private photo's which I think are pretty ok, but at the end of the day. I am more than my cock.

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RHP User

10 years ago

A underpants bliss renovation :) The imagery through her suggestions I reckon would be absolutely priceless :) - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

10 years ago

Quoting '50zcool' It's more a photography lesson than a cock critique, because that's the point...it's not meant to be a cock critique, it's meant to be a critique of the pics. As she says, critiquing cocks themselves would be pointless (because everyone's preferences are different) and it would create a lot of unnecessary angst.

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RHP User

10 years ago

Quoting 'Luckdragon23' Quoting '50zcool' It's more a photography lesson than a cock critique, because that's the point...it's not meant to be a cock critique, it's meant to be a critique of the pics. As she says, critiquing cocks themselves would be pointless (because everyone's preferences are different) and it would create a lot of unnecessary angst. Slow day ?

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RHP User

10 years ago

Quoting '50zcool'I have some private photo's which I think are pretty ok You gonna put your pics where your mouth is?

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RHP User

10 years ago

Quoting 'Meander' Quoting '50zcool'I have some private photo's which I think are pretty ok You gonna put your pics where your mouth is? mail me.

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RHP User

10 years ago

Done, your turn.

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RHP User

10 years ago

50zkool, My public opinion as promised via pm (before you gave me PG access): You have some really nice pics, but I think your cock shots aren't great. I like how your thighs and chest are included, and that you don't have a hardon. However... What's with all the crap in the background? It's seriously distracting. I notice you use the same talcum powder as me (good stuff, huh?), and wait... is that a sanitary pad on the floor?! Your pics gets a c-, you can do much better judging by that hot pic of your arse.

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RHP User

10 years ago

Seriously, put that bloody pic up for everyone, will ya?

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RHP User

10 years ago

Sounds like my school reports. "Could do better" And no it's not a sanitary pad !

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loveorall

10 years ago

Great article and well worth the fun reading it. I have no problem being rated /judged on any cock shot pic, and even if someone was just having a look / perv, well hopefully it can give them a little smile for the day :-) - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

10 years ago

Quoting 'Meander' If only the men who need to read this actually would. I take that back.

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Critique my dick pic with love

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