F55
Dating/ When should you have sex?
March 02 2018
Comments
-
RHP User
7 years ago
Personally, I don't think there's any right answer, I think whenever it feels right.Anything else is just game playing.
-
The_Antichrist
7 years ago
That RHP land dates are honestly any different to rsvp dates... All persons have the potential to go further don’t they?? At least that’s how it is for me anyway. But I guess that’s a whole different topic... But to answer, if I liked someone I’d still fuck em on the first date... - Posted from rhpmobile
-
Xxalex
7 years ago
I've always been a very slow mover in this area.. I've never been in it for a quick hook up, and only ever been with people I knew and respected greatly.. and generally it was a friendship that grew into more... official dates.. Not sure in the exact count. But it was at least the 3mth mark of known sexual interest before we went all the way... plenty of playing and teasing and mouth work before that though... However the last fwb was way different. We chatted a little as mates. Very quickly became very close. And after only 2 times hanging out together, I got a message saying "you better kiss me the next time you see me" .. followed a day later by "you better rip myh clothes off me the next time you are over and my kids staying with mum"..... and yeah. The next time I saw her it was on.... And then it ended as quickly as it started... I have to say, while it was fun and exciting and new for things to move that quickly for me.. I feel I missed a lot of her as a person and wish things had gone slower.... Guess it depends on what you hope to get out of the relationship and if you are serious about long term or not.... - Posted from rhpmobile
-
Kentia
7 years ago
9 years and counting we are together and our first date was just about sex. No rules. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
7 years ago
...before the first date. That way, you'll have something to talk about over dinner. Next question? 🤔🙃⚡️ - Posted from rhpmobile
-
sweetgem
7 years ago
I would wait for three months before I would take things into the bedroom! I have had relationships in the past where I had sex too soon (after a month of dating) and was seen as a “sleep around” material! 🙄 and so the treatments I received were not respectful, even though they tried to disguised it! 😏 have enough with the unfair and stupid judgments! - Posted from rhpmobile
-
swingalingson
7 years ago
In the past my best relationships have been driven by desire. Sex on a first date is okay. Why stop an emotion if it feels right and mutual No game play and no judgement. Why stop a sexual train the has already left the station! And that was not in Red-hot Pie LAND. Just plain old Vanilla LAND.
-
MsJonesy
7 years ago
For me. Although, like Meander it is rare to have sex on the first date..... RL or otherwise! I think for me its more likely to be determined by the amount of time spent together rather than the number of dates. I just go with the flow.
-
RHP User
7 years ago
These headgames really do my head in sometimes. Especially the gendered aspect of it. Men are "supposed to be" such and such, women are "supposed to be" such and such, blah blah blah......Meh. When it comes to sex and intimacy, I've always seemed to be wired much more like the stereotypical woman than man in many ways, so it never made much sense to me that there seems to be a massive disparity in how men and women are "supposed to be" different in this area. And the older I get and the more people I get to know, the more it seems like it's almost entirely a social and cultural construct. The variations between individuals are pretty big, but the overall difference between men and women seems to be largely cultural and made up. In short - I don't think there are any rules. Unless you're playing head games. I'm just not into that. My feeling is that if there is anything to win or lose, then I've already lost. *shrug*
-
RHP User
7 years ago
I've stopped having sex on the first date because the connection via chat can be very different to the connection once face to face. I also believe, in my opinion and by my experience that if you don't wait, men only see you as an easy fuck and nothing else. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
7 years ago
If the connection and sexual energy is there why wait?! 🎆 I’m not a teenager anymore worried what he may think of me or worried he’ll brag to his mates at school and I’ll gain a reputation 🙈 In saying that, it’s not an expectation, and I rarely will go there on a first date. Especially if they’re expecting to or dropping hints that we should “skip dinner” or not waste time. Urgh 🙄 date will definitely be canceled. I need to feel comfortable and safe with my date, I need to like them and want them and think about them, and feel a connection and spark ⚡️ If we do go there on the first date, and they judge me for it. Then easy! No second date and they’ll know what they’re now missing out on 😈😉 - Posted from rhpmobile
-
inspirit
7 years ago
What people should do. I think it all depends in what you are seeking and your drive. 3 dates... you say, yeah nah. Whats the point? Although I'm not seeking a committed reletionship. So my view point is probably not relevent. 100% good luck to those who are. 😁 - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
7 years ago
is such a natural thing. Waiting 3 months? Jeez, due respect to those people but what a what if after all that bonding/connecting, sex is really bad? Awkward! 😁 I also don't like to play head games, for me it's natural to want to be naked with them ASAP If a guy thinks I'm a slut, positive if he's turned on by that, negative if not, but then he wouldn't be the right person for me anyway. I do however agree or think RL vanillas are a different kettle of fish, lessons learned re telling them too much. They are generally quite intimidated by it, an alien concept to most. So I float along not worrying about it too much. I can't be someone I'm not so at some point, I would share all with them anyway. Definitely need to find a kinkster lol
-
RHP User
7 years ago
I string it out for a few dates I like to chat I like to listen And if I’m really into them, I really do want to get to know them The sexting and anticipation in between is HOT Every so often I have strayed from this and I have been sorry afterwards. Although I do love lust and alcohol, a lethal combo , the next morning through the haze I sometimes have seen the error of my ways So this is the way I go and it’s been good for me, and us
-
RHP User
7 years ago
If I was looking for a relationship my approach to the sex part of it wouldn't be much different to looking for a FWB / FB. Sometimes I have sex on a first date / meeting, sometimes I don't. Depends on a few different factors, but whether or not the guy is going to judge me if I do have sex on a first date doesn't come into my decision. If he's the type to do that then I wouldn't want to see him again anyway, or to put it more bluntly...fuck 'em (and not in the good way ).
-
RHP User
7 years ago
had the long, strung out mental foreplay...the teasing, the texting...only to find, that when we finally got there, the sex was crapon the other hand, had the opposite too...where sex was amazing, and the build up to get there made it even more so.... but also had that electricity and connection ,on a first date....that was so intense, that you had to think......"why on Earth would i not just go for it?.... right now!" it you ask yourself..."is this really what i want to do?"...and the answer is "fuck YES!"...then in my opinion life is just too short not to
-
EarthQueen
7 years ago
I went on a date today and am going on one tonight with the same person. If I follow my own rule, tomorrow its a free for all LOL After so long being attached its taken me at least a year to get my head round being single and dating TBH. Its been a constant source of angst and self reflection. What a mind fuck. Its a work in progress. Thanks for all the input so far. Very interesting.
-
RHP User
7 years ago
Bring on tomorrow 😜
-
Xxalex
7 years ago
You go girl, enjoy it and do what feels right. 😉 - Posted from rhpmobile
-
gazpacho
7 years ago
Obviously you should have sex right away. Then if it was worthwhile you can ask her name and stuff. Let’s face facts here. Life is short. You don’t want to be the guy who saves himself for marriage and 6 years into the relationship, on the night of the wedding, you realise that the love of your life is a starfish. No. Sexual compatibility first. Everything else can work itself out. Hugs Gaz
-
Rlee552
7 years ago
I think a lot of people are agreeing - it just simply depends. Interestingly though, the vast majority of people on this site prefer to meet and greet first. And that is after presumably there has been a lot of chatting beforehand about what you are into. So even on this site, sex on the first “date” is not a given.
-
EarthQueen
7 years ago
Quoting 'gazpacho51' No. Sexual compatibility first. Everything else can work itself out. Hmmm. Disagree. I used to agree with you but sometimes, have had amazing sex to start with with someone because I thought I really liked them but as I got to know them came to the realisation that I'm not really into them and what they're about. Once the mind switched off the body followed. No matter how hot they are in bed if Im not into them as a person its all over.
-
Katkat
7 years ago
For me it depends what my intention is, is just a fuck or do I really like the person. It really does depends as you get to know the person in the long run. Also I think is it really worth my time. Usually I’d suss & test them out first if they’re worth my time and the qualities I’m looking for it’s hard these days I have trust issues and I don’t trust anyone at all may be coz I had bad experiences with my exes. These days too many temptations out there that they have few fuck buddies already or either they’re attached or married. I always ask and carefully b4 I do it with anyone. But then again sometimes it just sizzles out or I just loose interest in the end. Everyone is different. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
inspirit
7 years ago
EQ is right 😛 I have had great sex on first dates but following through on subsequent meet ups is questionable. Even if they are a starfish, surely with the amount of experience we all profess to have, we can emlighten these folks. However in saying that, you can try, as it doesnt always work either. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
7 years ago
But that’s what Gaz means. If the sexual chemistry is right, you can get to know them and if you don’t like them there’s is no harm done right? But different to getting to know someone and falling in love only to realise your sexually incompatible. That would include kinks and attitudes to sex and relationships. More heartache the first way I reckon.
-
inspirit
7 years ago
Life is short. However I dot agree on the compatibility list. You can defo make it compatible IF you have the same devious tendencies and one of you less experience in this area to begin with. Personally I like to think it the mind that is compatible and the rest follows.
-
RHP User
7 years ago
Then ASAP 😛😛 - Posted from rhpmobile
Boards
-
Hot Topics
Topics: 14361 Comments: 120840
-
Girls Ask
Topics: 1355 Comments: 14709
-
Guys Ask
Topics: 2425 Comments: 17234
-
Couples' Corner
Topics: 2405 Comments: 12737
-
Swingers Lifestyle
Topics: 794 Comments: 5154
-
Fetish & Fantasy
Topics: 1148 Comments: 6957
-
Hot Travel
Topics: 622 Comments: 2145
-
LGBT
Topics: 156 Comments: 1150
Forum help
-
Something related with that
-
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
-
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
-
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
-
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
Share