RHP

RHP User

F70

Deal breakers

August 29 2015

There have been a few topics lately that have touched on this issue ...If you meet someone.or even before you meet,what are some of the deal breakers for you...apart from the common ones eg if someone is married or attached ,or the person has obviously lied to you,.what are some of the issues that prompt you to say,thanks but no thanks xxFreya

Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Deal-breakers in my profile: Smoking Text speak Tony Abbott Homophobia Cock shots Template profiles Self-importance Gold jewelry Possessiveness NSA hook-ups Also one-sentence or template messages, flirts from paid members asking me to message them and pics of single guys having sex. When meeting: Being more than 15 minutes late without a heads-up Arrogance and talking themselves upInterrupting Talking negatively about others or kissing and telling Expecting sex when my profile is clear I won't sleep with someone on a first date Being rude to staffDemands (like the guy who said on a first date: When you're my girlfriend I don't want you seeing other guys) Oh gods, I could go on ad nauseum.

  • 225Special

    225Special

    9 years ago

    Old matey sounded keen with the girlfriend comment Meander... For us, smoking would be the main thing we look at, that being said if the attraction was really strong we could spring for some mints.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Sadly, this list of deal-breakers is going to tell a sad sad story about my choices lately... Tattoos of your ex's nameMissing teeth from fighting or poor oral hygieneSmoking the crackpipeBeing a "baby-daddy" and not communicating with or financially supporting your tadpolesBeing overly-patriotic without having seen much else of the worldHating on things or peopleLiving like a complete slobIncapable of cooking for or cleaning up after themselvesBeing unable to empathise with othersBeing uncomfortable with difficult conversationsBeing unavailable, emotionally or physicallyMaking assumptions about me rather than actually getting to know meBeing uptight or unable to have a laugh at themselves... Those are indeed from a few unsavoury gentlemen who happened to grace my life lately, generally though my deal breakers are long, and pretty similar to Meander there.

  • AnnieWhichway

    AnnieWhichway

    9 years ago

    is guys that text or flirt. You answer promptly and see your response unopened for days or even weeks. Makes you think they can't be too excited at the prospect. Maybe i am an afterthought, a quick message before signing off because he had a spare left. Not going to waste a meet opportunity on them. I have one in my inbox now. Twice he's taken a fortnight to open.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    I just cancelled a coffee date,he sent me a framework for our meeting,sometimes men say too much...less is more xxFreya

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Lack of respect for any fellow human being (that doesn't mean you can't make jokes - I do - but if I see that you are really serious, then bye bye). That goes for my general peer group and dating. Agree with most of Meander's points, but most of them can be summarised under one word: ATTITUDE. Doesn't matter how good looking you might be, if you show a shitty attitude (snobbiness, rudeness etc), I'm like: Ok, I'm going to go over this way now... Also, not having me being a secret bit on the side for them (in a regular personal sense - party scenarios etc are different). I'm not completely against people doing it, your reasons may be quite understandable, but I don't want some jealous hubby/partner hunting me down :)

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Smokers, elitist attitude (I'm a princess syndrome), lack of humour, lying, cheaters.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    when it get's all to hard or harder than it ever need besitting there contemplating and arrived at wtf am i doing here recently -we got in on once -i get a text "Hi Dear".. huh i know I'm a half okay guy and shag but seriously :-)

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    I find the one thing that would be a deal breaker for me would be more personality wise than anything. Bigotry, racism and lack of respect for other people basically. I like to converse with the person I meet and I can't converse with closed minds

  • Bazingal

    Bazingal

    9 years ago

    I have to agree with the majority of what Meaner has said. The rest are listed on my profile.

  • MrandMrsBrady

    MrandMrsBrady

    9 years ago

    ... messages sent signed off xx or xo or xoxo etc etc Mrs UH - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Whilst there are things that I'm personally adamant about, I won't automatically dismiss somebody because they don't share my perspective or vice versa. As a matter of fact, if anything, I see that as being a welcome opportunity for growth - as is anything that confronts and/or challenges me on some level. The single most absolute deal breaker for me, in any given relationship (casual or otherwise, be it friends, even family), is feeling as though it's a one way street - in which case I'll quietly take myself out of the equation.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    ... passive aggression ...... if you have something to say ... please say it .. as it is dishonest and weak not to ...

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Quoting 'Meander' Deal-breakers in my profile: Smoking Text speak Tony Abbott Homophobia Cock shots Template profiles Self-importance Gold jewelry Possessiveness NSA hook-ups Also one-sentence or template messages, flirts from paid members asking me to message them and pics of single guys having sex. When meeting: Being more than 15 minutes late without a heads-up Arrogance and talking themselves upInterrupting Talking negatively about others or kissing and telling Expecting sex when my profile is clear I won't sleep with someone on a first date Being rude to staffDemands (like the guy who said on a first date: When you're my girlfriend I don't want you seeing other guys) Oh gods, I could go on ad nauseum. Riiiiight..... Okay, I think I can pass the first stage of the interview. How about living on the other side of the country...will that be a problem?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Messages that just hi do you want to meet.An invite to their home for the first meet.Flirts that say your hot, what do you think of me (there profile is a grey ghost and a template).Profiles that are full of ask meMen who send never ending text messages but have no intention to meet.Men that you have met and still send text messages everyday but never make time to meet again.

  • Missb4u

    Missb4u

    9 years ago

    Would be impossible... It can be sometimes be a complex thing and more a feel then anything specific or something as simple as the care taken when dressing. my absolute would be a closed mind or a judgmental person.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    been call a bitch be for a meet for just trying to kept it fun when txting

  • Single_Guy4U

    Single_Guy4U

    9 years ago

    Quoting 'CravingTouch' Sadly, this list of deal-breakers is going to tell a sad sad story about my choices lately... Tattoos of your ex's nameMissing teeth from fighting or poor oral hygieneSmoking the crackpipeBeing a "baby-daddy" and not communicating with or financially supporting your tadpolesBeing overly-patriotic without having seen much else of the worldHating on things or peopleLiving like a complete slobIncapable of cooking for or cleaning up after themselvesBeing unable to empathise with othersBeing uncomfortable with difficult conversationsBeing unavailable, emotionally or physicallyMaking assumptions about me rather than actually getting to know meBeing uptight or unable to have a laugh at themselves... Those are indeed from a few unsavoury gentlemen who happened to grace my life lately, generally though my deal breakers are long, and pretty similar to Meander there. Where are you meeting these guys ?? (hopefully not RHP), but if it is the local pub, suggest you change Haha. Seriously, seems like you are meeting the wrong type of guy, can only get better.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    and add: Answering the phone or texting during a meet,And addressing me as Darling or sweetheart after meeting for the first time over dinner, then continuing to do it after I've asked them to stop because I'm uncomfortable with it.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Thank you. Do you know how long people have been saying "It can only get better from here, right?" to me? Please don't tempt fate because lord knows it CAN get worse.

  • sweetgem

    sweetgem

    9 years ago

    Instant turn off even before we chat and/or before meet: - Disrespectful manners - Lazy messages that have only one word written in the message - Men who call me babe/baby in message even before I know of their existence - Chat for once or twice via messages and start asking for my home address, or insisting on me driving over to their place for some fun time - Men who are never interested in meeting up for a coffee first - Men who have listed anal sex as one of their fetishes (I'm not being judgmental, please don't get me wrong. I am only saying what turns me off in response to Freya's topic). Deal breakers when meeting: - Unclean/untidy appearance - Speak in dominant manner - Slouchy sitting posture - Keep starring at me like as if I was naked - Speak in slang language constantly - Bad sense of humour - Cheap skate attitude when neither of mine or his place is good for a play date and insist on going to a park or do it in the car And the list will go on....... - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    My "deal breakers" have changed over my time online,just as I have changed as well. Sometimes I have overlooked a particular thing Im usually not attracted to because there have been more positives that I was interested in. So my biggest deal breakers currently are my own attitude towards others and where my head is emotionally I suppose.

  • Chillihoney

    Chillihoney

    9 years ago

    High pitched voice Loud in conversation - no matter where Annoying/painful laugh Forehead hair line too :/ Energy thieves...

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    I've known a few people who are turned off by others that have particular interests listed. Maybe the only way around that is to have several profiles on the one site, aimed at different people? It's also a reason why many bi guys will list themselves as straight, so they actually have a chance with the many women who are not into bi men (besides the fact that other activities with other people, listed or unlisted, would not apply to the interaction with that person). - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    It will get better,take a break don't allow people into your life who are like this..are you meeting them here or in RL,?...you are an attractive,intelligent woman,that is evident from your profile and posts...You deserve to meet someone similar,don't accept anyone less hugs xxFreya

  • Lovinit28andKC72

    Lovinit28andKC72

    9 years ago

    Please have an open mind.... Don't be judgemental, narrow minded, a racist or homophobic.... Must have manners, kind heart, be able to hold a conversation, a sense of humour, personal hygiene, a job and teeth.... Don't be pushy, rude or arrogant.... Be honest, up front and all card on the table.... No continuous talk about your ex or other women.... No excessive whinging or on your phone, when with me....💋

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Quoting 'Koolgrey' How about living on the other side of the country...will that be a problem? Quoting 'Meander' Apart from attached, being under 6ft and not living in Sydney, from the top of my head

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Quoting 'Meander' Quoting 'Koolgrey' How about living on the other side of the country...will that be a problem? Quoting 'Meander' Apart from attached, being under 6ft and not living in Sydney, from the top of my head Ouch! Walked into that one. You can add "Failing to pay attention to what I say" to your list.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    ...I would have a small list like most here, but I'm not overly fussed about smoking...as long as a person has a sense of personal hygiene, that's what matters.Oh...and not interested in couples or attached women...call me selfish.But top of my list would be arrogance and a sense of self entitlement. Being humble goes a long way.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Quoting 'Freya70' It will get better,take a break don't allow people into your life who are like this..are you meeting them here or in RL,?...you are an attractive,intelligent woman,that is evident from your profile and posts...You deserve to meet someone similar,don't accept anyone less hugs xxFreya Lovely words from a lovely lady, thank you so much. I won't ever settle for less, never fear. I do give people a little too much trust and a few too many chances, which is both my strength and my weakness. Sometimes life puts people in your path that you need the energy to push down and step over. I call them hurdles, I hurdled that guy so hard.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    While some women do appear to be genuine at first glance, you never know, so these are my dealbreakers: No neo nazis, No one plotting the complete destruction of the world and/or universe No serial killers (unless officially retired) No literal back stabbers No cyborgs (including Cybernetic organisms) No vampires (unless you can show some restraint when giving a hickey) No aliens (yes I've seen "Species"), possible exception for a hot Na'vi No transformers No cartoon characters (look, some of you are very attractive, but with the 2D thing and all, there's too much risk of paper-cut type injuries during actual play, teeth are bad enough already) No time travellers (I know some of you will screw up someone's future, but that's just going overboard) No one on the dark side of the force No deceased (I'm not into necro stuff, I know you might just lay there but I will still check to see if you're still alive), this includes ghosts (I'm happy to get uhhh... slimey, but I still like real skin on skin) No mermaids (I'm not judging, but I do like legs wrapped around me) No werewolves (except for day play and STRICTLY indoor night play ONLY) I don't like making a list as long as this, because as the saying goes, beggars can't be choosers, and I don't want to risk ruling out everyone. I'm not saying I'm not flexible and I'm accepting of the way people are, but we are all allowed to have preferences.