F28

Difficulties finding Switchy/Dominant girls who love BDSM and are into other girls

August 18 2019

I have found recently that the vast majority of my area the girls are all subs too, with the majority of the few Domme's in my area becoming exclusively Pro Domme's as they are just so in demand right now (business savy ladies!). But with guys taking up all their time and focus, there just isn't anyone out their for us lesbians looking for a committed D/s and romantic relationship anymore. I did what was expected of a good sub girl in my area, dozens of hours of free housework ending in no play for years to develop a good reputation. Had 1 or 2 good relationships but nothing really lasted for long. Was a live in slave to my girlfriend/Mistress who was 18 yrs older than me for 3 years which was amazing. But since that ended I just haven't found anyone looking for a relationship or even regular play anymore. I opened myself to switching, as I just couldn't find anyone available who was Dominant, but being a sub at heart I don't really get anything out of it.With so few events to attend in my area, and none that focus on play/specific kinks, Im struggling to stay positive about my interests and relationship goals with no way to engage in the play and kinks I love.I don't really enjoy vanilla sex, and with that all I can find I feel like I am losing my identity as a sub, and a die-hard kinkster because my community just isn't big enough for me. Im a single girl, with her own place, a dungeon filled with 15k+ worth of gear, outfits and toys, but cant find a single other girl that's really into BDSM and wants to play. Anyone else had similar issues or found a solution to this, or is it that times are changing and old school traditional relationships are just not a thing anymore, everyone around me seems to just be having one night stands then moves on.

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FreeSpirits

5 years ago

I completely understand where you are coming from. Being a rope bunny I have spent so much time and energy trying to find that elusive rigger with enough experience to give me what I want and need. I have the same problem you do... the Perth scene just isn’t big enough! I know that in my case every rigger that knows his craft well is already in a relationship of some sort. I do have a couple of riggers I work with on a purely platonic level but I have never had the pleasure of experiencing sexual play that has eventuated from rope play. I am at a stage now where I have pretty much given up on ever achieving this. Luckily I also enjoy various other forms of kinky play and have a play partner who fulfils my needs in those areas. But rope is where my heart is truly at and yet it is so far out of reach. Even trying to find a man keen to learn the ropes so to speak is a monumental task. And I also agree re so many seem to be about one night stands and banging as many people as they can. I prefer quality over quantity and to build an intimate ongoing friendship/relationship... it is much more satisfying. I am pretty sure you are on the other site that caters to the different kinks/fetishes? All I can possibly say is stay true to yourself. Get out to the events/munches and hopefully when you least expect it that Domme will appear in your life xx

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RHP User

4 years ago

There are many time wasters out there I find, I've had so many scammers and con artists myself which is disappointing either that or Professional Mistress's which doesn't satisfy what I seek, but don't give in, there will be others out there, it's like fishing, the best catch is worth waiting for, maybe you need to find an inexperienced Dom female to guide in to the role, there are always plenty of curious women that lack the knowledge and experience to jump in to the role that be good in the role if they were shown the ropes and the benefits of being in that role. I wish you all the very best in your search.

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Difficulties finding Switchy/Dominant girls who love BDSM and are into other girls

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