M49
Don't even warrant a reply?
February 14 2016
Comments
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RHP User
9 years ago
Expectations need to be re-assessed as well, that's life in general! Plenty of sites out there.
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playfulminx
9 years ago
I try to reply to everyone but as I am very specific about what I'm seeking, I can keep up with messages. However, sometimes when I'm busy and a handful of messages come through, I won't reply unless they match what I'm seeking and tick other boxes. You don't have any public photos on show so it doesn't give an incentive for women to reply either way, unless you're giving out your private gallery with the message... Your profile write up is also a little snobby sounding sorry. Dipping your toe on the off chance that someone might interest YOU? Not sure if you have the exact same profile on other sites but might be worth revisiting your choice of words?
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RHP User
9 years ago
And I didn't even see the other threads. Disregard this one.
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RHP User
9 years ago
I could reverse your query and say " why do I recieve so many messages from people that dont fit my profile criteria?" Do you look at the profiles and check their age range? What they specifically ask for in their written profile but send a message anyway?Whats your approach in a first message? Just saying hi how are ya isnt going to get much attention over other messages women recieve. Also the full on I wanna fuck you wont get a reply either. I also think not having some form of a profile pic hinders anyone that is serious on being proactive. I did read your profile and you focus on what YOU want but dont mention anything about what you can give. Its all about marketing really. Im sorry you havent had a positive experience on here. I find messages on this site are no different to any other site Ive been on, including the vanilla sites. And honestly, no reply isnt nice, but sometimes its easier not to reply with a no thanks and then get another message whining about how they think I am wrong in my decision. But if its working for you better elsewhere, I would be sticking with that
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RHP User
9 years ago
your profile isn't doing you any favors i was put off by 'dipping my toe in' plus no public photos.
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RHP User
9 years ago
I've only been on this site for a short time and I think my profile reflects very clearly, certain criteria as to what I am seeking, but still men message. In the beginning I was determined to be polite and do the right thing and reply to everyone, but as time has gone on and Ive received so many messages, clearly not even close to matching my criteria, I've just given up replying. I certainly wouldn't contact anyone whose criteria I do not meet , is it asking so much to ask the same respect ? Is this a ego thing ? And every so often, when I politely reject a profile/message, often the recipient comes back with nasty comments, or continually asking why did I knock them back, or what is wrong with their profile that I knocked them back or how I'm going to be missing out etc etc. Funny, but its me who knows exactly what I want. So respectfully OP, I ask you, are you actually messaging those ladies , whose criteria you come close to fulfilling ? And as much as it goes against my grain, I'm now at the point I cant be bothered replying to inept messages. Yes that does make me rude but as Willow above stated, no reply is, a very definite reply.
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lovebitten
9 years ago
This forum post has more words than your profile!! Reveal a little more of yourself and maybe things might change for the better. Also, honestly, I don't think any member 'owes' any other member a response here. The times I have been polite I continue to get messages trying to convince me to change my mind. It's better not to open up the dyad right from the first instance. Best wishes, Lovebitten xox - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
so.... You're scoring lots.....except on rhp.... I dunno about you, but I wouldn't be curious about 1 site that you don't find your success on... I'd simply move on like cwhereitgoes mentioned.... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
I always check the "looking for me" box and carefully select profiles.I've made mistakes in the past and learnt from them, that's for sure.
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RHP User
9 years ago
I just got back from a movie to 20 notifications, flirts and 3 messages. Looks like there are genuine women out there.And just about to update my profile as well, thanks for the tips ladies :)
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RHP User
9 years ago
👍 put some effort into your profile, make sure you're hitting on women who's criteria you fit, take no reply as not interested and move on, and don't whine lol but take the time to read profiles, you might send off 50 messages but 49 of those 50 have stated they don't like facial hair? Just using that as an example, not critiquing, but think about it, what is the point in hitting on people unless you know and respect what it is they're looking for. Paying for a membership isn't gonna get you laid. You can turn this around with effort. Most important is pictures, show your body. No pictures or just head and shoulders will have me going for the back arrow. I'm not apologising to you or anyone else for that, why should I? 😎
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0z_boy
9 years ago
At Least you have 50 "eligible" women to message! I just did a search of women aged between 35-60 in NSW (the WHOLE of NSW mind you) ticked online now and looking for me. Results were less than one page at 11 eligible woman, and (apart from one) I would have to travel to Sydney just to meet, 800k away! Women are here primarily for sex, I find that they are perhaps even more fussy than if they were looking for a relationship, you know why paddle a canoe or cruise on a houseboat when you can get free rides on a jetski.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Is extremely important. If you don't want your face to be there for everyone to see just place in pg for interested ladies. - Posted from rhpmobile
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DynamicCouple36
9 years ago
No one owes you anything on this site. Women & couples get bombarded daily, with messages from "single" males, many of whom have clearly not read ones profile wording, nor do they fit ones criteria. No one is under any obligation to reply and or respond, to an unsolicted message. We have been polite and replied, but more than often in a response to a "No thanks" we get a nasty reply message along the lines of "You don't know what you are missing " or "why have you turned me down" , "You are stuck up snobs" etc etc etc. Clearly there are many people out there that : (a) Don't read ones profile wording fully (b) Don't respect ones clearly worded preferences & "looking for" criteria (c) Ignore point C above and contact one in any event . A clear indication that they have no respect for ones wishes(d) Cannot take no for an answer(e) Do not like to be rejected and or not get their way To be honest, it often becomes stressful, to reply to these messages, as more than often one then receives a negative & nasty response, and given the sheer quantity of messages received on a daily basis, its often just much easier (and certainly a lot less stressful) to simply delete and or ignore them.. A good way, to test the character and true intentions, of someone on here, is to hold back (for a while) on something they are asking for / wanting. If they become nasty and abusive and or throw their toys out of their cot, then for us, they have shown their true colours. As an example, we receive an unsolicited message from a person(s) unknown. The usual lame opening lines, as expected. We take note that they have opened their PG within this first message. 9 times out of 10 , said PG contains no face photos, but instead a barrage of penis photos. The other party then demands that we open our PG, as they opened theirs ... and so the "fun" begins. The more we delay opening our PG (which incidentally only contains face photos of us both) the angrier and more abusive the other party becomes. A blessing in disguise as we then know the type of person we are dealing with.
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RHP User
9 years ago
was checking "looking for me" As now, it would seem, that you're reliant on the website giving you those who THEY believe are looking for you.... That filter I've found mostly determines its choices based upon "woman seeking man" criteria.... And they maybe.....but it may not be ALL of the time - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
so many presumptions in your post. I open my PG because it shows my face and whenever I do receive a "no thanks" message, I always, always reply with "Thank you very much for at least replying, good luck in your search. Perhaps I just need to grow a thicker skin.
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RHP User
9 years ago
x
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Seachange
9 years ago
I feel for you for the frustration of not getting closure on your intentions on a person you have shown interest. Just take heart that we are not all rude and we all have good reasons. Most of the post above have articulated the reasons in great detail why we, single women and couples, dont respond. Take them into consideration as they are valid and very true to us. Dynamic couple have listed some experiences that may come inhandy for you in dealing with the non-reply. You have been to the other thread where another poster has complained about the same thing. Exactly the same reasons. There were a few who commented on your lacklustre profile which could also be a good reason for the non-reply. Perhaps take the advice into consideration, change the mix about and see if it will generate more response. I think the posters above have been helpful in getting your chances of getting laid better. Lol Do not take it personally as it will drive you batty. Just brush it off and move on. I see you are getting better success in other sites. so if this one does not work, there is a fallback plan? Good luck.
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RHP User
9 years ago
As they say. - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
9 years ago
Advertising drive id say..... " oh look. My inbox is filling. Its all good now peeps"
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RHP User
9 years ago
As you say. You are a nice guy , genuine , honest and attractive. Probally are , but are you messaging the right women ? Like most guys , we get attracted to a nice sexy picture which can be very misleading , what with photo shop and what not , everyone looks good. There's women here who complain they get too many messages, and probally do. But if they didn't receive any at all , they'd whinge about that too.. I agree with those who say read the profile carefully and get a feel for the lady. If their words are instructional and all about what THEY expect without mentioning much else. Dont entertain their ego , move on. Good luck
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Seachange
9 years ago
Quoting '0z_boy' At Least you have 50 "eligible" women to message! I just did a search of women aged between 35-60 in NSW (the WHOLE of NSW mind you) ticked online now and looking for me. Results were less than one page at 11 eligible woman, and (apart from one) I would have to travel to Sydney just to meet, 800k away! Women are here primarily for sex, I find that they are perhaps even more fussy than if they were looking for a relationship, you know why paddle a canoe or cruise on a houseboat when you can get free rides on a jetski. Lol, Your search criteria will definitely limit your pool as the ONLINE NOW option itself is very limiting, depending on the time of day you are logged on. If it is during the day, most will be at work. So no surprise there. Then there is the 'looking for me' option you ticked which again will match what they are looking for and your qualities, to a T. some of the criteria will be a guideline for some and will not be a deal breaker, such as Personality types ('Passionate' you have listed in your profile), the others will not be aware of. So again you have limited the pool by doing. My suggestion, run a nother search, on women of the age range you want, and not be too specific on the non-dealbreaker criteria. you may get more ladies to message. Good luck.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Hi, I think at time people do not make a lot of effort in their messages or their profile. My Profile is very honest and to be frank I am actually surprised at the response rate I do achieve. My message response rate is 88%My Flirt rate is 2.9|1 I get basically 3 flirts to every 1 I send. Considering that most flirts I send are in response to some I have received. I am more inclined to send a message as a response to a flirt. So I actually read the whole profile and all the content of the tabs as well. When I send a message it is obvious I have read the profile as I will almost always reference the profile. Even if I respond to a profile where I am out of preferences I start by acknowledging that, I still get a high response rate to those. You have to make an effort both in terms of your profile and your messages. Good Luck
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DynamicCouple36
9 years ago
Quoting 'Underlaid' so many presumptions in your post. I open my PG because it shows my face and whenever I do receive a "no thanks" message, I always, always reply with "Thank you very much for at least replying, good luck in your search. Perhaps I just need to grow a thicker skin. No, not "presumptions" nor assumptions, simply our experience on here, with regards messages received & replied to, since joining this site. We don't think that we are alone, with regards our experiences, as it would appear, based on other comments, that other people have had similar experiences. You asked, and we answered, from our point of view / our opinion and based on our experiences.
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Seachange
9 years ago
But you are having a whinge lolQuoting 'playfulminx' I try to reply to everyone but as I am very specific about what I'm seeking, I can keep up with messages. However, sometimes when I'm busy and a handful of messages come through, I won't reply unless they match what I'm seeking and tick other boxes. You don't have any public photos on show so it doesn't give an incentive for women to reply either way, unless you're giving out your private gallery with the message... Your profile write up is also a little snobby sounding sorry. Dipping your toe on the off chance that someone might interest YOU? Not sure if you have the exact same profile on other sites but might be worth revisiting your choice of words? It's ok to have a whinge to let out steam... and he got replies from posters that will put his 'whinge' in perspective, whether he wanted it or not. Lol. Ask and ye shall receive. You have also pointed out some things on his profile that may also help him understand his predicament. Maybe the advice will be heeded and we wont hear anymore 'whingeing'? But it is all up to him, his choice. Lol. Ahhh... the anticipation is killing me. Hehe.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Im on 3 sites. Im yet to pay for this one, but I think I should to be fair to the site. My concern is not the attention i get on any given day on this site I get plenty, on the others plenty. Some days It can be over whelming Sure some of the messages can be a little rude, some a little short and ...your saying where is this going...I have 3 issues a) People that agree to catch up & then CANCEL or Worse NO SHOW...it takes a lot of effort to get ready & in some cases I go buy new clothes, lingerie to impress & worse I turn down another invitation, if you have limitations say sob) the degrading 3rd message, typically by the people with an X Pic as their profile pic...the 1st is normally ok and wants to meet, the second normally around the meet and to some extent on meeting my expectations of more than just a quick fuck & leave...the 3rd just lack respect for another human beingc) Lastly if you are a COUPLE you are a couple....don't use your pretty partner to get to chat....if I want to chat to a guy I will, Im happy to meet guys, girls, T's & couples but just be what you say you are Overall to conquer you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince or princes... so just be honest & OH READ peoples profiles. For those that are interested Id love to meet people for sex or friendship....both are important parts of this journey
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rupamohan
9 years ago
You made an assumption all sites are equal then why no response here. That means may be all sites are not equal. It is possible girls on Rhp is less looking for what you are saying or get far too more messages. It will be hard to know exact reason but if other sites work better for you don't waste time here.. - Posted from rhpmobile
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goldcoastcple69
9 years ago
I think having a public photo that shows your face and body really helps. we just ignore any profile that doesnt clearly show face and body.Noone wants to message someone for pic access just to be disappointed then awkwardly have to say "sorry not interested" Becuase they didnt like what the person looked like..its just awkward
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social_suicide
9 years ago
Quoting 'DynamicCouple36' No one owes you anything on this site. Women & couples get bombarded daily, with messages from "single" males, many of whom have clearly not read ones profile wording, nor do they fit ones criteria. No one is under any obligation to reply and or respond, to an unsolicted message. We have been polite and replied, but more than often in a response to a "No thanks" we get a nasty reply message along the lines of "You don't know what you are missing " or "why have you turned me down" , "You are stuck up snobs" etc etc etc. Clearly there are many people out there that : (a) Don't read ones profile wording fully (b) Don't respect ones clearly worded preferences & "looking for" criteria (c) Ignore point C above and contact one in any event . A clear indication that they have no respect for ones wishes(d) Cannot take no for an answer(e) Do not like to be rejected and or not get their way To be honest, it often becomes stressful, to reply to these messages, as more than often one then receives a negative & nasty response, and given the sheer quantity of messages received on a daily basis, its often just much easier (and certainly a lot less stressful) to simply delete and or ignore them.. A good way, to test the character and true intentions, of someone on here, is to hold back (for a while) on something they are asking for / wanting. If they become nasty and abusive and or throw their toys out of their cot, then for us, they have shown their true colours. As an example, we receive an unsolicited message from a person(s) unknown. The usual lame opening lines, as expected. We take note that they have opened their PG within this first message. 9 times out of 10 , said PG contains no face photos, but instead a barrage of penis photos. The other party then demands that we open our PG, as they opened theirs ... and so the "fun" begins. The more we delay opening our PG (which incidentally only contains face photos of us both) the angrier and more abusive the other party becomes. A blessing in disguise as we then know the type of person we are dealing with. Firstly a shit load of your posts are vitriolic towards the single male....almost to the point of hating them, and you always go on about being "entitled" ....who are you attracting?......you said that you get " nasty" replies and so on........well DC36 we have never had a nasty reply to a message stating that we are not interested. I'm guessing that your attitude ie; "no one owes you nothing" gets you a lot of negativity. Sorry but there is no excuse for being bad mannered and clearly you think just by being on this site you get to be as rude as you please to people who have messaged you, hence the "nasty replies" You have said......"So many on here, have a sense of entitlement. They are of the opinion, that as this is a swingers / sex site, that everyone is on here for the same reason "......lol, that made me laugh....ahhh yes mate that is exactly what it is, which is why you have joined...lol....you are not here specifically for the forums are you? You also said......."It is unfortunate, within the 'swinging scene' that one finds people who feel that they are entitled to some "sexual action" and if they don't get it, then become nasty, angry and aggressive.".......well we have never ever experienced that and one can only assume that you are the common denominator as you have clearly illustrated that manners are discretionary., perhaps a more thoughtful response might reap a nicer response. You seem to attract this type of behavior a lot.The unsolicited message whine is funny, ahhh you have joined a sex site that actively promotes, gangbangs, orgies, 3ways, and any type of weirdness you can imagine, so pull your head out of the sand and look around you.
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RHP User
9 years ago
What you said about women being fussier looking for sex than they are a relationship is true in my books. If Im going to be intimate with someone, they have to tick my boxes, or its pointless. I dont just want sex, I want "amazing" sex.
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social_suicide
9 years ago
"We don't think that we are alone, with regards our experiences, as it would appear, based on other comments, that other people have had similar experiences.".............sorry buddy we have had the complete opposite experience to you. We have never experienced the nastiness you seem to attract.
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inspirit
9 years ago
Your profile is just fine. Just remember there are a lot of members who have left but their profile remains or they may just be having a break. It's life. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
OP, you rewrote your profile, its very appealing. Hope it works better for you
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0z_boy
9 years ago
Quoting 'lilybethyname' Quoting '0z_boy' At Least you have 50 "eligible" women to message! I just did a search of women aged between 35-60 in NSW (you think I should go nationwide and lower my age?)( the WHOLE of NSW mind you) ticked online now and looking for me. (exactly why is this a silly thing to do?) Lol, Your search criteria will definitely limit your pool as the ONLINE NOW option itself is very limiting, depending on the time of day you are logged on.(I aint a idgiot) If it is during the day, most will be at work. So no surprise there. (BOOOO) :P Then there is the 'looking for me'(hmmmm) option you ticked which again will match what they are looking for and your qualities, to a T. (please explain) some of the criteria will be a guideline for some and will not be a deal breaker, such as Personality types ('Passionate' you have listed in your profile), the others will not be aware of. So again you have limited the pool by doing. (Parden) My suggestion, run a nother search, on women of the age range you want, and not be too specific on the non-dealbreaker criteria. you may get more ladies to message. (thought I did that) Good luck.Ive just run another identical search at 8:00pm and have come up with 13 eligible women (still all from 700+km away) (bar one) Took your advice and ran another search minus the looking for me, now I get 2 and a half pages of results WOoooooooo Same outcome though all seeking younger guys and all bar 3 a good 8 hours ride away, it seems the "looking for me" relates mainly to age, or distance. Can someone clarify? Thanks for your advice though. :)
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RHP User
9 years ago
Didn't see the second page. Some genuinely nice replies, thank you to those people. :)
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RHP User
9 years ago
Couldn't agree more. Most days I think 'how hard can it be, find someone I'm attracted to, to have sex with?' Riiiiiight by the time you weed through the time wasting bullshit, fake profiles or spotting the 'this is what I looked like 20 years ago when I played sport' lol, or I'm really 49 but I'll say I'm 39, no-one will see through that right? 😁 Usually give it up as a bad joke around the second scotch lol
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RHP User
9 years ago
Love your thoughtful words Alicia and I agree the frogs & princes/princesses all part of the journey. To many people are caught up hanging out for the destination they forget to embrace all aspects of the journey......
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MsSuperFoxy
9 years ago
It's called "ghosting". Internet dating apps has become so fast paced, that people disappear faster than ever! POOF and they are goneski...something that puts David Copperfield to shame. Ghosting is the new 21st break up, it's been around since technology has became more popular as there's more and more dating Apps to choose from. So it's not you OP. People really have no obligations to answer a profile over the next. So it's your choice to renew or not. Oh BTW the way I met some truly fantastic people on here who have not ghosted. It happens, real people are out there. Keep being genuine and true to yourself. All the best. Ms Foxy
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