M63
Don't you sneer at profiles that say....... ?
July 27 2009
Comments
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loveprod
15 years ago
...They actually paid for the profile though. Then it would be more fun when you ignore them
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RHP User
15 years ago
it does sound a tad precious and arrogant, even coming from me with a profie like mine. i tend approach people like that with extreme caution if at all.
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RHP User
15 years ago
<<< quickly submits his profile for review... It's important to understand that some peoples only purpose in life is to act as a warning to others!
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playfulminx
15 years ago
Maybe she's a Domme with an axe to grind and wants to find a new victim?
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RHP User
15 years ago
Casava, I think your profile is fabulously honest and not arrogant at all :-) I'm having a bit of profile envy...
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RHP User
15 years ago
ah yes, I hear you... but you're looking at it from a man's point of view. Guys will, lets face it, fuck just about anything... short, tall, skinny, a little extra, BBW... tattoos..married, single, party girl or shy... if a girl was to say sure, come over tonight, not too many men are going to pass. I'm not saying ALL guys, but a lot will. Girls, on the other hand... well :) we have these preconceived ideas of a guy we'd love to be making love to (other than a male body with a dick), we know what turns us on, what doesnt, its not just a quick fuck to some of us. So, we will be picky, we know what we want (again, Im not talking for ALL girls, just the ones with a checklist) and like probably most of those girls, we're not in any mad rush to find the guy who can tick all the boxes... most realise they are limiting their options, but let me check my gaf meter.... nope seems I dont gaf. If he doesnt turn up no big deal. If he does.. we're both happy. I dont want to meet a kazillion guys to find one I'd like to sleep with. The checklist narrows it down. ;)
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RHP User
15 years ago
It could be that they just don't want anyone to contact them. Instead they contact the people they want to. Might just prevent a lot of messages they wouold otherwise get. Surely there isn't anyone really that bad on here is there?
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RHP User
15 years ago
We wondered if 'If you fit this description then contact me... IF NOT PLEASE DONT WASTE YOUR TIME OR MINE' was a template offered when they signed up :-S Loao at bob, they could really save us some time if they put it in their profile heading
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RHP User
15 years ago
"ok madam, start by telling me what you don't like.."......"what do you mean i fell asleep!"LRE (sitting next to the couch)
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RHP User
15 years ago
We all different.Some might find it challenging.Some might think hey thats me.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Goard the number of people who fill there profiles with information about what they DON'T want is baffling... yet, when you read many profile descriptions the writers come across as arse-hats. I like the straight up stories that say "this me-this what I like-this is what I am looking for"... the rest is boring lip gloss. There should be a maximum character limit so people have to think about it. Hugs Stky
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RHP User
13 years ago
Stalky I went over by 1000 and had to freakin edit it down. just cos I'm such a dirty perve as you know , I need to put a lot of shit in my profile, again just cos I can get narky as you know, when I have limited patience for repeating myself,likes,dislikes. God!!!! why can't some gorgeous , juicy fat dicked, dominant, sexy, HAWT, English speaking, educated, TD+H, experienced, filthy minded, well mannered man just send me a message and tell me what I want to hear? This whittling down get's tiresome
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'D_G_T' God!!!! why can't some gorgeous , juicy fat dicked, dominant, sexy, HAWT, English speaking, educated, TD+H, experienced, filthy minded, well mannered man just send me a message and tell me what I want to hear?. Oh DGT, I think I speak on behalf of all women when I say thank you, thank you, thank you. There is absolutely no way that I could have said that in less words *eyeroll* . Flirty x
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RHP User
13 years ago
I did DGT.....you seemed pretty pleased with it :-P
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RHP User
13 years ago
OK... I get it... but until that day comes along... wouldn't you rather just fuck?HugsStalky Quoting 'D_G_T'God!!!! why can't some gorgeous , juicy fat dicked, dominant, sexy, HAWT, English speaking, educated, TD+H, experienced, filthy minded, well mannered man just send me a message and tell me what I want to hear?
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RHP User
13 years ago
where on earth is my message? I meant to say, you look mighty juicy but why oh why can't you get my mind dripping before I put your cock in my mouth? It's all it takes.... At one point, I might have said yes to your suggestion to 'just fuck' but I'm a big girl now, and I've worked out all by my lonesome that if I don't have the mind tickle first , it really will be 'just a fuck' .......I won't cum.....and I will get mighty cranky with that outcome. Sure it's going to work for some, just not me, from experience I can't be arsed with half measures anymore, I'd rather spend the time ensuring all the boxes are ticked, ensuring that I get quality AND quantity meanwhile I will take care of myself (fucking the living shit out of my dildo) Until I find Mr. FuckYES !!! . Oh and Flirty, I felt it was time to give a little back to the female community
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RHP User
13 years ago
why can't we edit ourselves? It's not the same without my wink after "can't be arsed with half measures"
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RHP User
13 years ago
lmfao... a winking arse... at least that's something. I can work with that.... frap frap frap frap.... hehe.As for your message... I'm a guest and can't message you... jeeeesus woman... havent you been reading my flirts? This is very frustrating... frap frap frap frap... I get that you say you wont cum... but I can last for hours! How do you think I got the name Stalky StudFatDic... you just can't make that shit up you know. I'm pissed off. @*$% you too and the big red dildo you're squirming on. Squirter my arse. :pHugsStalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
shit,,is that what all those flirts were for? I thought it was a glitch.......you know like when some of you boys feel the need to send EVERY flirt available....oops sorry. as for my big red dildo frap frap frap it's niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice from where I'm sitting *looks down...nup still no squirt* best I go and talk dirty shit to myself, whisper in my own ear how hard I'm going to fuck myself in a minute.....ooh yeah baby....you're a dirty little bitch, you're going to feel every inch of my jelly dong . . ermmm scuse me , I have to go ....ummmm do stuff now
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RHP User
13 years ago
*waves to James *
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'jamesnp'I did DGT.....you seemed pretty pleased with it :-P Awhh... another DGT fan, how cute. xx Meeka
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'D_G_T'*waves to James * Poor James!
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RHP User
13 years ago
two hands and still a bit poking over the top just sayin
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RHP User
13 years ago
*waves to James*
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RHP User
13 years ago
now that's funny
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RHP User
13 years ago
....you could call me fan.....fanatic would be a tad more appropriate.....enough that she still looks intensely cute whilst half asleep :-) and a certain young lady still seems to enjoy extolling one of my few virtues on here....maybe she's trying to promote me or some such.......false advertising claims are sure to be filed now
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RHP User
13 years ago
I could be just pimping you out?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Did you see that DGT? He called you young lady!!!! . . . ... What did you do to him to make him think you were a lady???
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RHP User
13 years ago
If you're pimping me out, you really need to rethink your business model because i'm still poor :-(who says a woman who is intelligent and articulate, loves watching some unnamed porn and fucking herself silly with various toys can't be called a lady? sounds like the perfect definition of a lady if you ask me :-)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Flirty they clearly have never met. Now I can tell you James *waving* our DGT is no lady! She is one hawt woman so be careful befor she paddles your butt!! xx Meeka
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RHP User
13 years ago
James, is that a pair of Speedos you're sporting there fella? Don't answer straight away... I'd like the opportunity to make up my own mind... So errrrm if you happen to notice my handle popping up in your pervert list that's what I'm up to.... not perving on your cock.... don't worry. I would never do that! Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hey Fat Dick... I am a willing stunt bum maybe we can lure the lovely James out for some fun, you know check him out for the lovely DGT. What do you say James. xxMeeks
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RHP User
13 years ago
how awfully devious of you meeks......i never thought i'd see the day when you'd put yourself forward as the test guinea pig
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RHP User
13 years ago
????
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RHP User
13 years ago
You can all stop with the lovely, cute, and young lol You all know damn well I'm a dirty bitch Oh and Meeks n Fat dick, I'd be needing photo evidence please
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hmmmm. :) Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
Nobody actually said DP Stalky. But I'm happy to *shrug* . "DP". And I dont see why DGT should settle for shitty camera angles either, so I am prepared to go out on a limb and hold the camera on this occasion. But I cannot possibly work with low lighting. I like lights on. And no, nobody needs to pay me, I'll discuss exchanges with DGT when I deliver the merchandise to her in person. . . Flirty x
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RHP User
13 years ago
I will sayz zees only vonce..... double pénétration. Fat Dic looking forward to you slapping that big one on my ass. Now who is up first xx Meeks
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RHP User
13 years ago
Test Guinea pig James? Really? Bwahahaha you have no idea pretty boy. xx Meeks
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RHP User
13 years ago
...a New's Years resolution and use the word cougar. I think there are any number of the ladies here that would look just smashing wearing nothing but a Cougar bourbon t-shirt and a smile...regardless of their age. | D_G_T wrote: You all know damn well I'm a dirty bitch. | Even though the"Reply with Quote" option is broken again, I now understand what the letters mean and quite clearly as so very well stated in your profile... | Dirty_Girl_Tolstoy | If you can fuck like you write...I'll drop a double dose of Cialis and book a room at the Crown for the weekend. Jearzus..foreplay alone might just wipe out Saturday. | | Half the weird stuff happening here may be to server overload...you broke it, you fix it!
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RHP User
13 years ago
.....pretty boy....? Might want to be careful there, you might wind up a spluttering and quivering mess before you know what's happened to you.... Stalks, go nuts ;-)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Correct me if I'm wrong Meeka100 but I think James is intimating that he wants to play pigs!! He sure has a perty mouth! ;) I bags being poombah. Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
You cant have a tone or a screechy voice via written word by definition! Please dont have an opinion until you master basic english! xxxx P.S screechy does not have EA in it.... ANYWHERE! P.P.S please dont vote
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RHP User
13 years ago
He sure is perty! So I nominate James to be piggy in the middle first xx Meeks
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RHP User
13 years ago
You can't have a tone or a screechy voice via written word by definition! Please don't have an opinion until you master basic English! xxxx P.S. Screechy does not have "EA" in it.... ANYWHERE! P.P.S. Please don't vote. Thanks, I feel better now
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RHP User
13 years ago
You took the words right out of my mouth :-) Now if only I liked cock...god, imagine how much sex I'd get then :-P
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RHP User
13 years ago
with Cock Undersized Not Tinythough! ... and you are most welcome, james.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Looks like you get to be piggy in the middle then :-P Does that mean stalks and I have to flip a coin to see who gets which end first or will you decide that for us? :-P
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RHP User
13 years ago
Beggars cant be choosers :)*shrugs*.. lmao
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RHP User
13 years ago
That whole scene just played out in my head........ James you will be in front ......Meeks is the one with the curly tail.........Stalky in back , whispering dirty shit to Meeks throwing a few at you like, " you need to lift at least one arm up while she's sucking you boy" He'll bend foward to help Meeks with her gag tears, where he will get one look at your foreskin.......ummmmmm the rest cannot be printed due to the graphic nature.......suffice to say, your arse is grass
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RHP User
13 years ago
hands back up on the camera woman!!!! the good bit's about to start
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RHP User
13 years ago
men will and can say anything and have done for 1000 of years to get in a girls pants how do u know hes not just whispering sweet nothings .....me and i think most men get bored with typing for starters and then trying to express them selves in slow motion while tpying very frustrating for men ...woman love to talk and chat im an action man that means lets meet see if we clic ...your manner your aura the way you talk sit .your body language.is it a forced laugh does her eyes sparkle,,,i could go on and on ..u only get this from meeting some one face to face not having a list so u can cross man after man off this list .i think woman..well most want to cross the name off than take a chance...its a negitive way to go about it......
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RHP User
13 years ago
Nice imagination Dgt.... I hope Meeks is well practiced or has zero gag reflex....if so, she'll be the first to manage it all :-P
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RHP User
13 years ago
She's had a little bit of practice
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RHP User
13 years ago
Gag reflexes are a good thing. Makes the mascara run and makes for more determination to swallow a bloke whole.... and the noises... gotta love gag noises, spittle, tears and growling sounds. :) Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
James, is that an open challenge? I think we have found our champion for the pork sword swallowing competition Meeks!! Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
How embarrassing to include spelling mistakes to lambast someone for spelling poorly. But then, what could I expect from someone who seriously thinks that literature has no tone? Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
Have you been stealing my mascara Stalky? How is that I used to have tubes of the stuff everywhere and now I have none? Now I am still only an apprentice to the master pork sword swallower, I definitely need more practice before putting out that sort of challenge. So I will enter the competition but I am not putting my arse on the line for it. (Well I have to say that don't I... don't want to appear easy. :P )xxMeeka
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RHP User
13 years ago
I've been doing a few twilight gigs down in Melbourne as a Tim Mitchum stand in. Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
Sometimes even my toothbrush takes me over the edge, then my freshly done make-up for work is stuffed !!! why don't I ever remember to do it first? is it because my mind is ALWAYS elsewhere? Sheesh , a clean thought here and there might be nice...............for a change
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RHP User
13 years ago
That profile was closed about two years ago if I remember correctly... but in any case, I may be splitting hairs, but does that make it a younger profile? :pHugsStalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
I believe it is an open challenge....if perchance, one is female and confident in her pork sword swallowing skills, she may enter the competition. Fine print shall follow. 1st prize - a bucketload of pineapple-tainted cum and a severe fucking, resulting in as many orgasms I may possibly provide her. 2nd prize - a severe fucking, resulting in as many orgasms I may possibly provide her, then getting covered in a bucketload of pineapple-tainted cum. 3rd prize - probably a lot less cum, the factory might be a tad overworked by this point :-P
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RHP User
13 years ago
The ongoing pork sword swallowing competition already has well established rules you see, James, although the prize component that you're promoting sounds pretty promising to me... so we might have to make a few little adjustments to accommodate these impositions.... I will put it to the committee so that we can discuss how the award ceremonies shall be managed, and whether drinks and light snacks will be provided during interval.Of course, as a matter of good probity, the venue and contestants shall remain anonymous so that there can be no accusations of bias in the decision making process.In th interim... I'd like to take this opportunity to thank you for your participation, please keep up the pinapple juice but no more than 1 litres per day... oh.. and those armpits... no deoderant! One of the judges has allergies. :)And can I just mention... woooohooo!HugsStalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hahaha, ok, I'll steer clear of the deodorant then. We'll have to organise a venue with a shower :-) Which member of the "committee" is going to post the event? No one could ever make accusations of bias here, either one can swallow said pork sword or they cannot. However, place getters will be decided by the judges, all of whom will have to take individual measurements as to how much length was not swallowed. Thereby, second prize will have the smallest unswallowed amount and so on. Now, contestants, please pm your details to either myself, Stalks or the committee.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Ooh how exciting, the person who wins can fuck James.... Servely. Hope I win, I would love to get some Jamie pork on my strapon fork. Although I still classify myself as a beginner in the strapon fucking Jamie, so I might not fuck you severely. Well not the first time anyway. BTW, for the judging to be impartial I think the stud cock, aka Jamie, needs to be blindfolded. It's the only fair way. What do you think fellow committee member StalkY ? xx M
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RHP User
13 years ago
Lolz Meeks. There you go scaring people with that strap on again. Haven't you learnt anything about waving that thing around? You can take an eye out with that thing! Not to mention the accident. Im not even gunna go there as it brings tears to my eyes and I am yet to apply any mascara. Oh no. I'm going to address the committee in detail, but my thoughts are that there will be No blindfolds this time Meeks. You cheater. We'll do this fair and square for once. Participants who are wet and squelchy are going to have to suffer the indignity of squatting on his face to obscure his vision. We'll use the rotation method, so he can fill out the score cards and catch his breathe. Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
And those who are not wet and squelchy shall be so once finished squatting.
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RHP User
13 years ago
So far, I have not received a single entrant to the aforementioned competition. I must say, I am thoroughly disappointed by those who proclaim to have sensational oral skills but when the time comes, cannot put their money where their mouth is so to speak. For the sake of rhp womankind, please rectify this. :-P
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RHP User
13 years ago
Is DGT something I missed ?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Then I'm going to have to answer.......yep you missed me
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RHP User
13 years ago
Lolz James... don't stress out on such minuscule details! Just bring your dick and a two day load! Hehe... leave the rest to the committee to sort out. We need to settle a date... build it (erect it, in this instance) and they will cum. :)) Btw... What the fuck is a dgt? Hehe. Lmfao. Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
Committee - sort your shit out.That is all.Thank you.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Just taking the piss. Someone will organise something whilst I tear my hair out over the details and then stress the hell out of myself about something over which I have no control. Either that or I'll be sitting in the chat room playing with myself because I've nothing better to do.
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