RHP

RHP User

M38

FWB to Swinging

June 25 2015

What is the best way to approach a FWB to get into the swinging scene as a couple? I've been seeing an incredibly sexy girl for a while now and while she loves a bit of kink she is still very shy. I think she'd love the scene once she has been introduced to it, but approaching her is the hard part as I don't want to ruin a great casual relationship. Would love any advice. - Posted from rhpmobile

Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    ... and I don't want to over step the mark in fear of spoiling something good... Watching this one with equal interest...

  • TimeToPlayAus

    TimeToPlayAus

    9 years ago

    You're FWBs, not in a relationship. Ask her if it's something she'd be interested to in trying out. As FWBs presumably you aren't exclusive, so if she has an exhibitionistic or voyeuristic streak (or both) then she'll probably be up for it. There's no harm in asking, it's when you push that problems arise.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    ? It's a casual relationship. Just ask her if she is interesting in it. I find it really bizarre that people will fuck each other but they don't actually talk about their sexual interests.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    When I met a great man here, he suggested we could make a couples profile together as he was very keen to try an MFM threesome with me. He made the idea sound very appealing and it was an offer I just couldn't refuse. (And boy, was I glad I didn't! That MFM was just the start of some amazing adventures.) OP, make sure your FWB knows this is something you want to do with her, not just something you want to do. Good luck x

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    and just tell her your thoughts.... How hard is it?? You fuck right?? So you've already established that you guys can talk about shit... - Posted from rhpmobile

  • blkcapricornday

    blkcapricornday

    9 years ago

    Hey mate, good question. I've just been through the same thing, and I understand why you're treading carefully/respectfully. Regardless of what everyone says, you just can't come out with it out of the blue. People on here are much more liberal than in real life, and for many swinging is not a 'norm'. I suggest trying to find out what her fantasies are. And not just everyday fantasies, but also deep and darker ones, most people have one or two of those. And for some people this takes time, because for one reason or another they may not be as comfortable with these feelings as you or I. Best way is to discuss it whilst being intimate, when you're both in the zone. Another way is whilst 'sexting'. Set up a fantasy or scenario, and see where she takes it? You might find she has a mmf or mff fantasy she has never tried or perhaps never spoken about. This could be a first step to trying this out. At some point though you should tell her what your fantasies are, and also be open to the possibility that she might have no interest in non one-on-one sex at all.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Most of the time when i read these type of posts, I think to my self. "Whats the problem?" and then I remember, look at the OP's age and there is the answer. Just ask her, whats wrong with you? The worst she could do is think you are a freak and never see you again. Which would be a good thing, then you can devote more time to finding someone who wants to swing. You could even consider going swinging by your self and finding someone there. That way you know they are into swinging. But I think you like her more than a friend, and this is just your way of moving it out of the friend only zone. LOL

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Just ask her. If you're not man enough to ask her, then you're not man enough to be swinging. Simple as that.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Especially Meander. Letting her know it's something I want to do with her is obviously an important distinction. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • Mischeviouslad

    Mischeviouslad

    9 years ago

    Quoting 'SamScarbs27' Especially Meander. Letting her know it's something I want to do with her is obviously an important distinction. Just make sure its something you want rot do WITH her...... and not just because she gives you access to another world full of other people.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Quoting 'Meeka100' ? It's a casual relationship. Just ask her if she is interesting in it. I find it really bizarre that people will fuck each other but they don't actually talk about their sexual interests. yeah, but people don't always give honest answers, they moderate their answers by how they expect their audience to react to an answer. e.g. it was quite a while before a girlfriend admitted that she REALLY liked deepthroating cock, she'd never said anything before because she was worried what I'd think (obviously I thought "duh, awesome" - but then I guess others might have the thought process that says ""uh oh, that must mean she's a bit of a trollop")

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Same same! People are ok having sex and getting naked but once it comes to talking about stuff you want to try or have a fantasy about poeple (and myself) feel as tho its wrong to talk about

  • blkcapricornday

    blkcapricornday

    9 years ago

    Some very misguided comments in here.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    How about you explain why and give some helpful input instead of just having a whinge?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Thanks for the advice. If you scroll up Meander he has already given advice. His latest comment is directed at all those saying man up and ask. Clearly my question is asking HOW to ask or bring it up, so those comments are pointless to me. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Quoting 'stellafella6869' Same same! People are ok having sex and getting naked but once it comes to talking about stuff you want to try or have a fantasy about poeple (and myself) feel as tho its wrong to talk about Why on earth would you think it was wrong? What the? @_@ This is why people get into relationships were they are not sexually compatible and end up cheating down the track. I just don't understand this at all.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Quoting 'SamScarbs27' Thanks for the advice. If you scroll up Meander he has already given advice. His latest comment is directed at all those saying man up and ask. Clearly my question is asking HOW to ask or bring it up, so those comments are pointless to me. - Posted from rhpmobile I would just mention it in passing at first and suss out her thoughts about it. Talk about it like it is something that has interested you, or you are intrigued about it and think that maybe one day you might like to try it type of thing. Hello pretty girl in my bed, have you ever heard about swinging? What do you think about it? Hello pretty girl in my bed, some friends were telling me about group sex the other day. You know, it is something that kind of interests me. What do you think about it? Can you ever see yourself doing something like that? DO NOT SAYI would love to see you spit roasted with a big butch bloke pounding your face. Also not something you should say - so do you fantasize about girls going down on you, etc, etc. Also definitely do not ask if she has a friend that she thinks would be keen to join you in the bedroom - and 100% don't mention anyone you know, man or woman, by name and suggest that you might all be great in bed together. If you actually manage it bring it up...... always leave it up to her to mention people you might know first.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Hadn't seen your first response when I posted my comment to you, so I take that back. Sorry. Thanks for explaining what he meant with the "misguided" comment, Sam.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    I also like his advice as well. To try teasing it out in other ways about what she might fantasize about. Sam, But you mention that she loves a bit of kink. So obviously she is not some scared little virgin then? So just mentioning some kink and other "ideas" shouldn't be that much more of a stretch... just to talk about.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Thanks for the advice, just what I was looking for. I'm sure that's the best way to approach it. While she's not some scared little virgin, most things we've done have been a first for her so she's not completely comfortable with it as yet. I'm sure with the right conversation I can intrigue her enough to perhaps branch out further. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • madotara69

    madotara69

    9 years ago

    That's what you ought to be whispering in her ear while you're fucking. Mado Mado Tara xx

  • RHP

    RHP User

    9 years ago

    Just out of interest did it take you a period of time to get to know your initial partner - I ask because I think I like the idea but would need to be very comfortable before I initiated the concept.