F39
Females only events, spaces and places
May 18 2016
Comments
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DynamicCouple36
9 years ago
We think that females do have the right to feel safe, and if a "females only event /place/space" provides an opportunity for this to happen, then yes, it is a good thing. A space/place where the females would not have to worry about being harassed, pestered, approached, perved upon, stared at and stalked by men. Think about going to a nude beach, from a female's perspective ........just as an example.
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RHP User
9 years ago
In female only environments and I found them unhealthy environments. Recently after a few disasters with female housemates I decided to choose a male housemate. It's early days yet but so far so good. However I do think there is nothing wrong with gender specific clubs or gyms etc,it's all about choice. In the 70s women were banned from bars in pubs where the drinks were cheaper,that was discrimination. The Men's Shed is I think a perfect example of gender specific support which works for older men who are often socially isolated. I am not sure if the C.W.A is still only for women,but traditionally it was. So OP I don't have a problem with gender specific groups if there are choices being made. Q
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RHP User
9 years ago
I think imposition of any form of segregation is anathema to the entire concept of equality (of gender, race, or indeed any parameter by which people seek to identify themselves or one another). In my opinion, people would be far better served by more, not less discussion, association and interaction with people of different backgrounds and experiences to themselves. Throughout history, those people/societies who were open to communication and cultural and trade exchanges have managed to achieve the greatest advancements in science and education, and the most peaceful and prosperous lifestyles. I can only see reversion to an insular mindset as being a major step backwards for our entire society.
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RHP User
9 years ago
If there is a men's only gym or club the world goes batshit crazy.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Really, the nude beach? Didn't I just see you in the nude beach etiquette thread, so what are you suggesting, we now have female only and male only sections at the nude beach. Getting a bit carried away aren't you and a bit dinosaur like? I don't warm to authoritarians, sorry Well, I won't be going anywhere with female only just sayin I might try to infiltrate the male section though mmm have them all to myself
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RHP User
9 years ago
I think this issue would quickly dissipate if people were properly educated and socialized from childhood. From the youngest age, kids usually will naturally freely associate and play together irrespective of their differences of gender, race etc. It's been my own observation that kids tend to become more prejudiced as they grow older and begin to take cues from much older children and adults. In my view, segregation helps serve to suppress socialisation and learning (of self and others), and it thereby reinforces the prejudices held (sometimes encouraged) by people who may be misguided (or have been mislead). Too many opportunities are lost to what I perceive to be petty and small minded prejudice. For what it's worth, upon meeting, I try to focus first (and more) on what I have in common with others. There are not that many people I find I can't get along with. I can't see why that approach could not also work for other people.
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RHP User
9 years ago
The Men's Shed is a good thing, absolutley. I have noticed comments on articles discussing this issue were men get a bit up set by the exclusion and the assumption that all men are untrustworthy. I can see their point. Is segregating people promoting understanding between the sexes? But, I agree with comments about having female spaces where you don't have to worry about men or how you look is a nice thing too.
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RHP User
9 years ago
I am hearing there is a taxi company where you can request a female driver. After being propositioned by a taxi driver who thought Id been drinking ( couple of years ago) I think its a good idea. Most taxi drivers are nice and respectful but Ive come across a couple who are not. We have had girls only and boys only schools forever. In my view boys and girls mixing as teens is a better situation.. Makes them more respectful and social as they mature.
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DynamicCouple36
9 years ago
Quoting 'I_touch_myself2' Really, the nude beach? Didn't I just see you in the nude beach etiquette thread, so what are you suggesting, we now have female only and male only sections at the nude beach. Getting a bit carried away aren't you and a bit dinosaur like? I don't warm to authoritarians, sorry Well, I won't be going anywhere with female only just sayin I might try to infiltrate the male section though mmm have them all to myself It seems that you have misunderstood us. We were not suggesting that nude beaches be made only for females. Our comment re a nude beach was to demonstrate how some females (if not all) feel when they get pestered and stalked by some males. Many just don' feel safe, or at ease, at a nude beach (as clearly evident in the nude beach forum post) . What we were trying to get at, that it would be nice if there would be some places where females could feel safe and free from male intrusion (again out of choice). An all female gym is a fine example, that way the girls (those who want to) can concentrate on their exercise/fitness regime without having to worry about guys perving and harassing them (as sometimes happens at gyms). Again just an example. Some clubs (just normal ones) had girls only up to a certain time, after which the guys were let in (were called ladies nights where we come from) and it allowed the girls to have fun, drink, dance and laugh, without having to fend off guys - and it was very popular. Everything in moderation, with the key word being "choice".
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RHP User
9 years ago
Yeah, fair enough, choice for sure. My choice is uni-sex lol of course, no surprises there
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DynamicCouple36
9 years ago
A fine example is that the sexes are generally separated at most, if not all, public toilets. And this is widely accepted and for very good reasons 😊 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
...separate events and places for both, why wouldn't there be? Certainly we are progressing out of the dark ages of social exclusion based on gender yet at the same time need to acknowledge that here are differences between men and women other than the more obvious and highly enjoyable physiological differences. Here's just one well-documented example... Despite rumors to the contrary, men and women are from the same planet. However, there are many differences between the brains of men and women. There is bound to be some respectful discourse about this topic, so please feel free to comment or provide alternative points of view. Brain size: The male brain is typically about ten percent larger than the female brain. Although the extra mass does give males more processing power, this doesn’t make men more intelligent. Rather, science believes the reason for the increased brain mass is to accommodate the bigger body mass and muscle groups of the male. Brain hemispheres: Many men are sharply left-brain dominant, while women tend to be more evenly balanced between left and right-brain processing. Women are therefore thought to be slightly more intuitive, and sometimes better communicators. Men are often less socially adept, and are more task-oriented thinkers than females. Relationships: Women are purported to have better communication skills and emotional intelligence than men. Women tend to be group-oriented, and apt to seek solutions by talking through issues. Men can have trouble picking up on emotional cues unless they’re clearly verbalized – making for tricky communications between the sexes. Mathematical skills: The inferior-parietal lobule, which controls numerical brain function, is larger in males than in females. On standardized tests, men often score higher on mathematical tests than women. Stress: When faced with stressful situations, men usually employ '‘fight or flight'’ tactics, while women use a ‘'tend or befriend’' response that is rooted in their natural instincts for caring for their children and establishing strong group bonds. Language: Women often excel at language-based tasks for two reasons: two brain areas that deal with language are larger in females, and females process language in both hemispheres while males favour a single brain half. Emotions: Since women tend to have a larger deep limbic system then men, they’re more in touch with their feelings and are better at expressing their emotions. This makes women better at connecting with others, but unfortunately also more prone to different types of depression. Spatial abilities: The parietal region is thicker in the female brain, making it harder for them to mentally rotate objects – an important spatial skill. Women often report difficulty with spatial tasks, both on tests and in real life. Want to test this theory with a loved one? Susceptibility to brain function disorders: Men are more likely to be dyslexic or have other language disabilities, since they’re more often left-brain dominant. Males are also more prone to autism, ADHD and Tourette’s Syndrome, while women are more susceptible to mood disorders like anxiety and depression. Sorry, ya'all as it ain't exactly sexy but science and observation tell us it's true. Once we realize how complimentary these difference can be, maybe we can all just get naked and have some fun!
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RHP User
9 years ago
...hope it wasn't boring nor offensive, ℳ
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Grouse33
9 years ago
It shits me to tears when blokes get upset about female only events/spaces etc. I reckon the outrage is about having their privilege limited - the smallest move to make something off limits to them can cause the most incredible invective. So what if, for example, I can't go to Fernwood - there are plenty of other gyms that will take my money and make me feel comfortable and supported. And no, having female only spaces is not equivalent to the days when women weren't allowed in public bars etc. The former is about safety/comfort/support while the latter was a group of people excluding less powerful people from the stuff they got to enjoy. I know there will probably be a shitstorm about what I've said, but there you go. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
Curious... I would wonder how much of that can be put down purely to sex differences, and not to the impact of environmental factors / raising / parenting / societal pressures and other influences? The ole nature v nurture? I remember seeing a documentary about how dressing babies in different colour clothing led to people treating the two 'different' babies very differently - from the way the baby was held and spoken to, to the type of toys that were given to the child. Would doing a cross-sectional approach and looking at structure and function at time points, really give the full picture? Apart from the brain size - which I guess is relative to body mass in general? Didn't Einstein apparently have a very average sized brain? It's all about connections, baby
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RHP User
9 years ago
Good post, well put. This is a topic which has been extensively studied and reported over the years. Amongst the range of books by Allan and Barbara Pease, I recall one titled "Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps". They have a very easy writing style injected with a dose of humour which most people would likely find an entertaining and informative read.
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RHP User
9 years ago
... for a contrite answer to a question regarding how many feet to a mile? His answer was that his mind was for creative thought and the answer to such a mundane question was in the nearest dictionary. Here is one more for you... There are five houses in five different colours in a row. In each house lives a person with a different nationality. The five owners drink a certain type of beverage, smoke a certain brand of cigar and keep a certain pet. No owners have the same pet, smoke the same brand of cigar, or drink the same beverage. Other facts: The Brit lives in the red house. The Swede keeps dogs as pets. The Dane drinks tea. The green house is on the immediate left of the white house. The green house's owner drinks coffee. The owner who smokes Pall Mall rears birds. The owner of the yellow house smokes Dunhill. The owner living in the center house drinks milk. The Norwegian lives in the first house. The owner who smokes Blends lives next to the one who keeps cats. The owner who keeps the horse lives next to the one who smokes Dunhill. The owner who smokes Bluemasters drinks beer. The German smokes Prince. The Norwegian lives next to the blue house. The owner who smokes Blends lives next to the one who drinks water. The question is: who owns the fish? If you don't answer correctly, I'll settle for cheap and tawdry sex then give you the answer in the morning when I'm cooking breakfast!
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RHP User
9 years ago
You are a cruel mad MidnightCruiser. I was very tired and about to call it night when I read your post. It was a map folded the wrong way... (iTouch can explain). I had to solve it. Now...so not to be a spoiler... I will message you the answer. ...and I like my coffee strong in the morning... Thanks.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'Grouse33' It shits me to tears when blokes get upset about female only events/spaces etc. I reckon the outrage is about having their privilege limited - the smallest move to make something off limits to them can cause the most incredible invective. So what if, for example, I can't go to Fernwood - there are plenty of other gyms that will take my money and make me feel comfortable and supported. And no, having female only spaces is not equivalent to the days when women weren't allowed in public bars etc. The former is about safety/comfort/support while the latter was a group of people excluding less powerful people from the stuff they got to enjoy. I think I'd enjoy exercising at a Fernwood gym, the decor seems to really suit my idea of a workout... why are the people in power over the policies of this business preventing me from doing something that they get to enjoy? I don't really mind Fernwood only allowing women, but I don't think it is a consistent position to say private clubs catering to other genders must allow my gender in, but then also allow clubs that don't allow anyone except my gender. I do understand the reasons behind the campaigns to allow women into the clubs for the "Big End of Town" - I'm happy for that to happen, but then I think you also have to accept that it then should apply as a general principle that "you cannot discriminate/limit membership based on gender". Alternately, you do accept that gender/sex can be a determining factor in allowing entry into a club/establishment/space/etc. But if you're then going to tell specific clubs they must open their membership to allow open access to both genders to these "halls of power", you're just setting up a shell game where the "halls of power" shift from club to club if the membership is determined to keep a certain group from entering. I think the outrage isn't necessarily about privilege being limited, but because it isn't seen to be equal - they're thinking "our club is defined as male only, but we're being told we must allow women, yet that other club defines itself as women only, and they're allowed to stay that way". I think you either allow that clubs/businesses should be allowed to deal with whoever they wish to (and NOT deal with whoever they wish to for any reason) or you make it a requirement that everyone is to be dealt with regardless of anything except their ability to meet the required costs and behave themselves appropriately around other members (if that applies to the club/business). That doesn't say you couldn't make the environment itself cater to a certain group - some women like a gym full of pink weights, some guys might too.... and plenty of men and women might think that's a bit naff and go off to other gyms for their own reasons. DynamicCouple: regardng public toilets being gender restricted. I don't see any good reason for it, unisex toilets are becoming increasingly common. I can see a case being made for separate urinals for men and women, but who cares what the gender of the person who uses the cubicle before or after you was? It's only you and whoever else you allow into it, the door locks. Unisex toilet cubicles gives more efficient resource usage.
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lovman8
9 years ago
MidnightCruisin, all the points you make are valid. And while these gender differences are observable, the variations within genders of these qualities are greater than the differences between genders. Some women are better at maths and map reading than the average man and some men are more emotional and better comunicaters than the average women. PepperRose makes a valid comment and overall the genders have vastly more similarities than differences. And until the vast majority of men recognise this and treat women equally with the respect that is their right I can see the argument for women only events,places and spaces. But I'm with I Touch and MUCH prefer mixed sex events. Or on second thoughts a pass to women only events could be a great experience!!!
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'SNAG4XTC' You are a cruel man MidnightCruiser. I was very tired and about to call it night when I read your post. It was a map folded the wrong way... (iTouch can explain). ... and you got it in one! My first response to that riddle was ''Oh for chrissake, who cares'' then it got the better of my imagination and before checking the answer, ruined a couple of perfectly good pencils, a new writing pad and about a half-kilo of freshly ground coffee beans! The cohiba out on the back patio was optional but thought it might help! Hope it was fun ... and thanks!
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RHP User
9 years ago
I can understand your point and agree with it. However, don't you think it might be a blanket approach which implies that the majority of men can't be trusted. I don't blame good men who get upset with this. Female only carriages, female taxi drivers for female only cabs, female only gyms, female only beaches areas. I remember once looking into cabs before getting in - I don't know maybe I wanted to look at the face to see if i felt comfortable with the driver - he told me he found that a bit upsetting because he feels like he is being judged as a would be violent man.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Up to the 1940's baby boys wore pink and baby girls wore blue. It was a few large manufacturers in the US who decided to flip it in the 40's and these designated colours have stayed ever since. My sister tried so hard to introduce different colours for my niece (my sister hates pink) yet my little niece adores pink and will only wear dresses. Hard wired into kids by childrens programmes and movies.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'Grouse33' It shits me to tears when blokes get upset about female only events/spaces etc. I reckon the outrage is about having their privilege limited - the smallest move to make something off limits to them can cause the most incredible invective. So what if, for example, I can't go to Fernwood - there are plenty of other gyms that will take my money and make me feel comfortable and supported. And no, having female only spaces is not equivalent to the days when women weren't allowed in public bars etc. The former is about safety/comfort/support while the latter was a group of people excluding less powerful people from the stuff they got to enjoy. I know there will probably be a shitstorm about what I've said, but there you go. - Posted from rhpmobile Does it shit you that men's only clubs have had to fight in court in order to stay open due to women complaining about them being discriminatory? Yet you have Fernwood & Curves who clearly discriminate against males.... Don't get me wrong i couldn't care either way, I'm quite happy for women to have a gym they can go to and feel comfortable, but when you start trying to force male only venues to close down because they are discriminatory then you know the world is turning into a PC bullshit world. Sounds to me that you simply wrote a post in order to beat your chest and look good for the females on the forum.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'Adelaide3some' Sounds to me that you simply wrote a post in order to beat your chest and look good for the females on the forum. In truth, who gives a arse flipping shit if there are men's clubs, women's clubs, people's clubs or kid's clubs? I can't wait for a post crapping on about the ''Mickey Mouse Club'' and someone then trying to score big points with Mickey or Minnie being PC correct liberalist that want to make it a ''Mouseketeer Club''. Oh well.... mouse shit happens!
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SexyDeviants
9 years ago
It didn't work in the past, why would it work now? Without straying away from your topic too much... I'd hate to be the bearer of bad news but when women are abused physically/sexual, there's an enormous chance it isn't in some dark alley way or dingy car park... It's at home, with someone they should trust... So I fail to see how the 'female only' places stop this. I think it's a bandaid. I go to a gym at 11pm most nights, with a few males hanging around... I walk to my car in a dark car park from work at 1030pm most nights, plenty of men hanging around... I catch cabs at midnight and later, only ever men driving. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, it does and it's horrible. But the place where we should feel most safest is usually the place where women are most vulnerable. That needs to change first. On the flip side I'm more than keen to join a female only nude yoga class 😜😍 Ms D
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RHP User
9 years ago
MC I started with a pen and paper and quickly discovered that you had posted a hard one, so I did it in Excel.
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RHP User
9 years ago
If you think my question is so dumb why are you contributing? I wish you wouldn't.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Would be nice if the women of the world and PC do-gooders left well alone and just enjoyed their clubs and left male only venues to the men. Some women just like to stir shit. They don't actually wish to attend the club they just want it shut down cos they're not allowed in. Same with men and women only gyms etc. If you aren't allowed in somewhere find somewhere you are...simple. And leave the other places to be run as they see fit. You're not breaking down barriers you're just being a pain in the arse which is most probably the reasoning behind these clubs etc in the first place.
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MadhattersCat
9 years ago
This world has become overcrowded and scary - if i was a girl i would be extremely careful and be happy to feel the safety of not being gawked at by weirdoes. Get me and 3 horny mates together we are weirdos. But now some take it further. Fucks up all the fun. Challenge the world but always ensure your safety. if ensuring safety is girls clubs - so be it !!
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MadhattersCat
9 years ago
how do i get invited ? only kidding - yoga is the last place i would be seen, rather do nude "take out the rubbish" It embarrasses the hell out of my children. Even more than taking them shopping in my pyjamas. That is real fun !!!
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RHP User
9 years ago
Please do re-read the posts I've put up here... at no time (intentionally or otherwise) did I say that your original post was either dumb nor worthy of consideration. It is and if you read my first response, it was in total agreement to the right of either males or females to have their own organizations and/or clubs. Why wouldn't they? The brief discourse on Einstein was a bit of fun for a few folks here, nothing more and nothing less. It could have equally been on the works of Marie Curie although that could have gone radio active and far off topic. Be well and I do respect your opinions equally.
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RHP User
9 years ago
In a democracy there should be choice. If you prefer to go to a gender specific event/club you have that choice. If you prefer mixed gender then you also have that choice. I don't see a problem with it at all. A transgender person could have a foot in both doors.... how good is that! LG
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'CandyDelicious' Up to the 1940's baby boys wore pink and baby girls wore blue. It was a few large manufacturers in the US who decided to flip it in the 40's and these designated colours have stayed ever since. My sister tried so hard to introduce different colours for my niece (my sister hates pink) yet my little niece adores pink and will only wear dresses. Hard wired into kids by childrens programmes and movies. I have a transgender family member. As a child "she" loved pink and wore it constantly. She wore fairy outfits 24/7 until they were worn out. Now "he" still loves pink but doesn't wear it as much because its not so commonly available in men's clothing. Adults are more conscious of associated meanings or labels relating to colour than children are. I don't agree it is hardwired, it comes down to personal likes and dislikes. As a child I was never into pink or dolls. I preferred toy animals and being a tom boy. I read a book called Brain Sex which was a study based on whether children were influenced by gender stereotyped toys. From babies through to primary school children - both sexes were given a choice and exposed to a whole range of toys including dolls, dress ups, sand pits, trucks, footballs, tea sets, etc. No child was given gender specific toys to play with or exposed to gender specific advertising (this study was done in the 1970s when media wasn't so insidious or prevalent as it is these days). Showing my age I guess The study showed that the majority of girls preferred playing with dolls and dress ups, the majority of boys chose more adventure type toys and games. Approx 1/3 chose toys and games that crossed over into both types of play. The study found girls were more nurturing and wanted to do the things mummy was doing. The boys preferred to play sport, make things and did what daddy did at home. So at the end of the day, children copy adults but also have their own preferences. As they get older peer pressure influences them the most. Nowadays, its the young adults that get sucked into wanting to be like the "Kardashians" .. *sigh* Hopefully most will again start to make their own decisions as adulthood kicks in. For some it never does and will always be influenced by others. The individuals will always do their own thing. Sorry for going a little off topic OP. LG
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RHP User
9 years ago
segregation, surely only widens communication gaps?its a sad fact of humanity that we are governed by our lowest denominators.ie, the few dickheads change the rules for the majority.
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