M47
First impressions count... for nought?
March 14 2014
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
After a first crap email I'm not interested in reading the second.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
If someone fails to engage me with their ability to articulate their written thoughts in arenas such as this, it doesn't much matter to me how good the visual appeal is. I need to be lured by a brain as well as a body. But, I will give them a few emails to try to pass muster first. DG - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Broadly, first messages are make or break. There have been exceptions but pretty much I (we) put a lot of value on first impressions. Interestingly (or not), first impressions on pics less so because I don't think a camera can catch a sparkle in the eye or pheromones that make you swoon. Some people just don't photograph well so I'm always open minded about that. Having said that, if your dirty undies and general grubbiness is in the pic, I'm more likely to become disinterested. But yeah, first impressions count - mostly. Kisses, J (Mrs) - Posted from rhpmobile
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gazpacho
11 years ago
My besty is an articulate gene man, that can't write a sentence. I love him long time. I think you have to be really careful making decisions about people from their txt. You've made my day Mr Trogg Gazpacho - Posted from rhpmobile
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rupamohan
11 years ago
Very interesting topic..and I can relate to your experience... We are here for sex. Talk is just a bonus. We have met people with very articulated profile, but hopeless in bed. Very good looking but average hygiene and also people who can't express themselves well but very friendly and horny. Some (or most??) people can have extensive and rigid selection rules. First expression in this situation can matter most and at any stage one rule fail and you are out. We have small amount of rigid rules. Rest is a big picture. What it means is to get thru you need to score minimum total in that picture doesn't matter where you score low or high. This approach allows us to trade off your good points with bad points. In this approach the importance of first expression is far less. However it requires more responsibility from all.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I'm a cunt.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'gazpacho51' My besty is an articulate gene man, that can't write a sentence. I love him long time. I think you have to be really careful making decisions about people from their txt. You've made my day Mr Trogg Gazpacho - Posted from rhpmobile on this one. If you read my posts and they are often full of errors, the gramma and spelling police would hang me. but I have told people many times I am dyslexic. and often to lazy to bother to change it.some of the most interesting people I know are illiterate, this does not mean your not smart. those that can write a storm and spell all proper can in turn be the most ignorant of people. good for you, for going the right way and not wiping the floor with those less fortunate with being a words smith. there are guys on here that I have met that you would think were meat heads by the terrible clumsy profile. yet are the most delicious, attentive articulate lovers. LadyT looking it up in the dick on ary
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' I'm a cunt. your just a fussy cunt
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' If someone fails to engage me with their ability to articulate their written thoughts in arenas such as this, it doesn't much matter to me how good the visual appeal is. I need to be lured by a brain as well as a body. But, I will give them a few emails to try to pass muster first. DG - Posted from rhpmobile I reeely think youre a hot and I wud luv to have yu giv me som cunilinguiste and can I see your big Chook
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
:p
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madotara69
11 years ago
A rip snorta of an idea? Where does one draw the line? Mado Tara xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Making a poor first impression in the first message isn't necessarily about bad grammar, thats just one part; it's a whole heap of things, not least of which is how much effort and apparent thought has gone into the process. Sometimes, it's so obvious it's the same old message they send to everyone and that's not good enough to get in my knickers! But the first impression still carries weight. I think you can get a flavour of someone from the various pieces of the 'first message puzzle' along with their profile etc. I'm a believer in listening to your instinct (with a pinch of leeway here and there). Just my thoughts though, Kisses, J (Mrs) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Now you have to be intellectual,string a story together announcing yes im a good guy my bedtime reading is a thesaurus with the odd bit of shakespeare thrown in for good measure! FFS shallow isnt even on this measure,personality isnt gained from a singular message,but then again on rhp it obviously is ! Shame really - well nah not buying the thesaurus and shakespeare has never floated my boat,mmm could be a long,long time before the next interaction - Posted from rhpmobile
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sweetgem
11 years ago
Although, English is not my first language, I am still fussy with words and how well one can write lol BUT I have learned years ago that never judge a book by its cover, so I always give it patience and time to get to know someone that I am interested in, or would like to be friends with. Like you OP, to my surprise, some of the gentlemen I met in the past (online and offline) were actually the opposite from their writing skill! Charming, respectful, generous are just a few names to begin with describing those men. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Through which they assess if someone interests them. Some of mine are a person's ability to write, think, mount a rational argument etc. Others include their curiosity about the world, their sense of adventure, their lack (I would hope) of bigotry and prejudice. We all have things that are important to us. Like Meander, I don't bother reading past one poorly written email. Sure, I might miss out on meeting a great person but the world's full of great people for me, and them, to meet. I offer no apology for having my filters :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Assume nothing Expect even less Desire everything Want it all Recieve anything Get somethimg Impressions impress . - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I might miss out on a great person, but there are many more. After all, I'm not here to meet the love of my life. So a fussy cunt I can and will be. If my mind is not turned on, my body won't be either.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I find with text messages that some people can be quite abrupt... Or maybe it's because I jibber jabber too much? I have found certain cultures more Abrupt in their manner, not because they mean to be rude or curt, it's just their way. Not bad, just different to mine.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I usually react like that to messages from younger people that have all the text speak in their emails. It makes me feel like they are from another generation, well of Course, but I immediately feel as if we would not have anything in common. That they are still a kid. Nothing wrong with that, but just not for me.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Quoting 'andyinoz' Now you have to be intellectual,string a story together announcing yes im a good guy my bedtime reading is a thesaurus with the odd bit of shakespeare thrown in for good measure! FFS shallow isnt even on this measure,personality isnt gained from a singular message,but then again on rhp it obviously is ! Shame really - well nah not buying the thesaurus and shakespeare has never floated my boat,mmm could be a long,long time before the next interaction - Posted from rhpmobile So what we're reading in this topic... as we've done in countless similar topics before it.... is that women are offering men valuable advice on how to approach, message and seduce them.... which is to YOUR advantage...... ...... and you're choosing to dismiss it.... because accepting the realities of life is all too hard. That'd be why it will be "a long,long time before the next interaction" Just sayin;. lol. DG
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'andyinoz' Now you have to be intellectual,string a story together announcing yes im a good guy my bedtime reading is a thesaurus with the odd bit of shakespeare thrown in for good measure! FFS shallow isnt even on this measure,personality isnt gained from a singular message,but then again on rhp it obviously is ! Shame really - well nah not buying the thesaurus and shakespeare has never floated my boat,mmm could be a long,long time before the next interaction - Posted from rhpmobile Andyinoz just because a couple of people have mentioned they do like this shouldn't mean nyou get your knickers in a twist. Some people find intellectuals very sexy. It is what turns them on. People that are good with words turn me on. If you are not into Shakespeare and thesaurus, well good for you. I am sure you are not interested in the women that are into that either. So where is the problem?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Yes, you have to be an intellectual. For me. And really, who cares what I think? As much as you may not be the man for me, I'm not the woman for you either. Better to find that out sooner rather than later, I think.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Meeka my dear my knickers arent most definately in a twist,thats my opinion :-) Meander thats your opinion and fair play to you for your honesty. Mlad im more than happy to browse in the library until i find the right book. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
What does it matter? I get my conversations from, and my brain stimulated from other people offline. I do not get into the role of Puck in a midsummer nights dream, with a guy I am fucking. I would assume then the cull system is to find men that you want some kind of continued relationship with? I can understand then the cull process. If its more than a roll in the hay. That is why some people like to put professional up there, so they get the guys in suits or what ever. for me its just sex so my filtering is more the law of physical attraction. I have no idea how that will pan out till the person is in front of me, so my filtering is really pictures( face) and how they sound on the phone. I have found that people with good ability to write, lead my brain down to a path that when I meet them I feel like shit as I have no interest what so ever and I bought the pup. so I would rather just meet the guys first before I make any assumption about their intelligence. some guys are very quiet, but deep thinkers but each person must have their own system, what ever floats your boat I guess. the best system for me is the guy that makes me laugh. and who are not arrogant, confident yes, arrogant no. Lady T with a filter with big holes in it
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'LadyTuscan' I would assume then the cull system is to find men that you want some kind of continued relationship with? I can understand then the cull process. If its more than a roll in the hay. Correct.
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RHP User
11 years ago
LadyT I want more than a pretty cock. I want a bloke that is really fun and good company and smart.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Maybe I'm wrong, but it appeared to me Andy, you were complaining about the rules in the Library, not the number of books available ;-) happy browsing. lol. - Posted from rhpmobile
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uneventful
11 years ago
Like and support andyinoz. His response to this topic is spot on. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
So I stumbled on the forum hot patch... I've read enough of the back catalogue to know the issue of expectations of communication skills is perennially vexed, and unresolvable. It's the same anywhere online. I didn't mean to buy into that argument. I meant to highlight that I had an encounter in which my personal preferences were not met in the first (and second) impression, to the point I contemplated a "no thanks", or that it was a fake I needed to expose. The point of the observation was that my first and second impressions were blown away by the third. I couldn't give a monkey's if someone's preferences are different to mine, and it's a whole different discussion as to whether just a shag needs some kind of mental stimulation to work or not (and in what circumstances that applies). I should have realised, too, that my willingness to persist to the third impression is a function of the fact I get a nibble on my line every other millennium, give or take. Interestingly (or not), my third impression knock out wasn't physically in my "hot zone" either. The time of life is short; to spend that shortness basely were too long.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Rules there are no rules,but opinions they are most welcome,i may agree,disagree but hey thats me,it still doesnt reflect my intellectuality or personality,a spoken word is a true relection of ones self ;-) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Reflection - Posted from rhpmobile
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thedevilsfantasy
11 years ago
No I don't go on first impressions.. especially an email.. If I'm attracted to the person and they fit what I'm looking for, I really couldn't care if they can spell or even speak for that matter!! lol ..as long as they know what they're doing.. I'm not a people's person, I can take or leave most people.. I'm not here to make friends or for conversation, chances are we'd have nothing in common anyway.. I have chatted for months to men who have been very intelligent, well spoken etc only to finally meet and be disappointed.. I think some may use words to make up for their inadequacies and insecurities in other areas.
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