F52

Happy Australia Day Everybody!!!!

January 26 2012

You know you're Australian if:* You believe that stubbies can be either drunk or worn.* You're liable to burst out laughing whenever you hear of Americans "rooting" for something.* You pronounce Melbourne as 'Mel-bin'. You believe the 'L' in the word 'Australia' is optional.* You can translate: 'Dazza and Shazza played Acca Dacca on the way to Maccas.'* You believe it makes perfect sense for a nation to decorate its highways with large fibreglass bananas, prawns and sheep.* You call your best friend 'a total bastard' but someone you really, truly despise is just 'a bit of a bastard'.* You think 'Woolloomooloo' is a perfectly reasonable name for a place.* You're secretly proud of our killer wildlife.* You believe it makes sense for a country to have a $1 coin that's twice as big as its $2 coin.* You understand that 'Wagga Wagga' can be abbreviated to 'Wagga' but 'Woy Woy' can't be called 'Woy'.* You believe that cooked-down axle grease makes a good breakfast spread. You've also squeezed it through Vita Wheats to make little Vegemite worms.* You believe all famous Kiwis are actually Australian, until they stuff up, at which point they again become Kiwis.* Beetroot with your Hamburger... Of course.* You know that certain words must, by law, be shouted out during any rendition of the Angels' song 'Am I Ever Gonna See Your Face Again' And "Living next door to Alice".* You believe that the confectionery known as the Wagon Wheel has become smaller with every passing year.* You believe that every important discovery in the world was made by an Australian but then sold off to the Yanks for a pittance.* You believe that the more you shorten someone's name the more you like them.* Whatever your linguistic skills, you find yourself able to order takeaway fluently in every Asian language.* You understand that 'excuse me' can sound rude, While 'scuse me' is always polite.* You know what it's like to swallow a fly, on occasion via your nose.* You know it's not summer until the steering wheel is too hot to handle and a seat belt buckle becomes a pretty good branding iron.* Your biggest family argument over the summer concerned the rules for beach cricket.* You shake your head in horror when companies try to market what they call 'Anzac cookies'.* You still think of Kylie as 'that girl off Neighbours'.* When working on a bar, you understand male customers will feel the need to offer an excuse whenever they order low-alcohol beer.* You know how to abbreviate every word, all of which usually end in -o: arvo, combo, garbo, kero, metho, milko, muso, rego, servo, smoko, speedo, righto, goodo etc.* You know that there is a universal place called "woop woop" located in the middle of nowhere...no matter where you actually are. ** You know that none of us actually drink Fosters beer, because it tastes like shit. But we let the world think we do. Because we can.* You have some time in your life slept with Aeroguard on in the summer. Maybe even as perfume.* You've only ever used the words - tops, ripper, sick, mad, rad, sweet - to mean good. And then you place 'bloody' in front of it when you REALLY mean it.* You know that the barbecue is a political arena; the person holding the tongs is always the boss and usually a man. And the women make the Salad.* You say 'no worries' quite often, whether you realise it or not.* You understand what no wucking furries means.* You've drank your tea/coffee/milo through a Tim Tam.* You own a Bond's chesty. In several different colours.* You know that roo meat tastes pretty good, But not as good as barra. Or a meat pie.* You know that some people pronounce Australia like "Straya" and that's ok.

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RHP User

13 years ago

Reckon we should put all of that to a tune..... and make it our nation anthem. lol & yep. the wagon whell is def smaller!!!! Happy Aus Day!

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RHP User

13 years ago

Are we the only country in the world to eat our national emblem? Does anyone still say 'Ave a good weekend?

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RHP User

13 years ago

...although a few hours late. Oh well....it's 5:00 somewhere. | Now about those yanks...ya'all would say 'ooting anyway and save the fly "r" that also disappears off of mutha, which is only half a word where I come from and dump it back in your drawrings. No, drawing...say it with me. | You would also appreciate and understand the real meaning of the song..."Get Your Kicks on Root 66". | Best of all you'd now how to take the piss ..and have a laugh. I enjoy being here and at least for today I will try not to look too nervous standing in a public urinal and some big "bloke" looks over at me with my "willy" hanging out and says.. | "How ya goin'...all right". | I now know that doesn't mean he is about to pee on my foot just to take the piss outta me. | ...find a lamb and eat her!

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contemplating1

13 years ago

......You take the day off following to make it a looong weekend! 'Ave a good 'un!

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RHP User

13 years ago

Having read through the list I can quite confidently say I am definitely NOT Australian. Panic over

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RHP User

13 years ago

Big guy, nuffin to be ashamed of for us mate.......You obviously don't want any Aussie chicks to root ya Baahhaaa you must be either a Pom or a Kiwi

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RHP User

13 years ago

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love the country I live in. I was born here and on many occasions I have been proud to call myself Australian. I would be proud to do so all the time if it wasn't for our long list of political blunders or racial embarrassments, but I digress. Sadly, I am constantly mistaken for a Pom because of my accent. I am in no way British nor were any of my ancestors British. I have never lived there and am yet to visit either. I think I have finally figured out why this mistake is constantly made. It is because I annunciate myself properly. Because I don't add "o" to the end of most nouns or pronounce the letter "H" as "haitch". Has the linguistics of this nation become so bad that even a native is mistaken as a foreigner because he annunciates himself properly?

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RHP User

13 years ago

So true!! I always thought servo was a real word until a Kiwi pointed out the error of my ways recently :)

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lovman8

13 years ago

Fuck ! I'm an Ostralyn. Great list Goodglzsayplz. You've given meaning to my life.

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RHP User

13 years ago

So pleased to be of service Mr Lovman8

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RHP User

13 years ago

Servo is a real word- it's a little motor thing used in remote control cars and stuff.Tell you a story:)A Kiwi and an aussie dude- driving down the road see a sheep with it's head stuck in a fence- kiwi stops car and then jumps out-runs up to sheep and proceeds to have SEX with it! Yells to aussie when he's done "You're go bro!" Aussie jumps out of car runs up and sticks his head in fence! No offense intended to any any or all parties mentioned!

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Happy Australia Day Everybody!!!!

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