M46 F42

How does your night of Swinging start with a couple.

July 16 2013

We have been in this lifestyle for a number of years now and generally play dates for us go the same way each time. Just wondering if its us and someone has a better plan or this is how it is.So we meet a couple at a bar/ party. Eye each other off, the guys talk to each other and the girls talk to each other then generally switch. Sometimes the venue allows for all to talk at once but its rare with bar noise.Then if you are keen on the other half then seeing if there is any flirting back but you don't want to flirt too much or even at all in case your partner isn't keen on the other OR isn't getting any sign from the other half that its on or not. Generally most men and women don't flirt with each other for fear of possibly offending their partner (if they aren't getting attention) or offending the other partner if they aren't into it. So its much safer for girls to just flirt with each other, leaving the guys to talk each other and being spectators (which gets very boring). So until you can get a chance to talk to your partner to say 'I'm keen' or 'I'm not' you need to have some kind or idea if it is indeed on between all four of you before you make that commitment. Coming out and asking 'we are keen are you?' Can lead to people feeling awkward if they aren't or people going through with something they don't really want to.Ok so you are back in the room so it is assumed that it is on but then generally there is still a whole bunch of talking to be done because no one wants to make the first move. Its generally girl on girl first so its up to them to make the first move. As a guy I can make the first move but I have in the past and my wife is left sitting there looking awkwardly at the other guy waiting for him to make a move.Once the girls start and go for a while its generally accepted that the guys then pair off with the other girl and it begins. This process up until nudity can generally take HOURS and it need not. Why can't we say 'We are keen, we are here for the sex, lets start the sex' without it being weird.Does anyone start their swinging any differently? Because at the moment its driving me mad and there needs to be an easier way.

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chevtrek

11 years ago

I have not done the club scene much But 1 on 1 meets seem ok We start with chat then go into a sex game the usual is a card game or strip poker or black jack. Then it takes off from there.

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RHP User

11 years ago

Games can work, if chemistry is right and the partner is cool it normally goes with her sitting next to us and us taking her full attention with the hubbies permission. Soft play, sensual play, touching soft kisses on the nape of the neck, long slow but firm strokes of her body with 4 hands letting her know she is the center of attention. From there it's all fun and games. I have not done mfmf yet as my playmate (female) and I have not found a pair we click with yet. We always meet for a coffee and no pressure chat first to get that initial awkwardness out of the way before the play date. - Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

11 years ago

You are over thinking the whole thing! Okay I am not a couple but this is what I would do. Every one flirts with everyone at the bar or club or where ever you are going to meet. It's just politeness after all and I assume that you have seen photos prior to meeting so you know that you are attracted enough for some light flirtation even if you saying, no thank you, at the end of the night. I find it surprising that you need to talk about it... can't couples see in each others eyes if they are keen? I know when I am with people I am regularly with I have a fair idea when they are keen on someone. Anyway, I don't see anything wrong with stating that you are keen and would the other couple like to join in you in the room. Come on, you will all be fucking each other soon.... whats a little awkwardness at this stage???Once you get back into the room and after maybe one more drink to relax, I would either start kissing my partner and invite them to join in. Or I would start the discussion by asking what are their boudaries, or what do they like sexual, etc. I don't know why you wait for the girls to make the moves? Once you know what is expected just go for it. God! This is why bisexual men are so much more fun to have group sex with. There is no awkwardness.... and they are all over each other while I am still closing the front door!

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RHP User

11 years ago

I generally have a shower before I play always ( sorry fanatical about hygiene) so when I have just a towell or bathrobe on it is easy to start as all I have to do is sit next to them and things happen quite easily as I am basically undressed except for a towel ect- Posted from rhpmobile

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RHP User

11 years ago

My exp was quiet good actually, hubby n wifey arrived at my hotel room with a glass of wine n some general small chat for maybe 1/2 hour then wifey was keen to start things, we headed off to the playroom and were going great by the time hubby came in and started doing his thing, was a awesome exp, small talk works well. Although I think cause we had messaged n chatted before the night it certainly helped make things happen quicker.

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RHP User

11 years ago

I like it when my parnter starts to flirt and tease because hey ur in that enviroment and it like a rush then after that just go with the flow lol.

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RHP User

11 years ago

Quoting 'Meeka100' God! This is why bisexual men are so much more fun to have group sex with. There is no awkwardness.... and they are all over each other while I am still closing the front door! Wow, Hope they have time to get a condom on, that has to be very very safe .

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RHP User

11 years ago

We all use condoms mate. You are the ones that don't like to use condoms. Besides I find that bi men are into lots of touching and foreplay... Plenty of time for condoms. ;-)

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RHP User

11 years ago

Quoting 'Meeka100'God! This is why bisexual men are so much more fun to have group sex with. There is no awkwardness.... and they are all over each other while I am still closing the front door! Absolutely Meeks and the comfort factor is why Bi men are always welcome with us even though Gazz is not Bi. We have found that so many 'straight' guys who claim comfort in a MFM scene often are quite uncomfortable when push comes to shove so to speak, or as we have personally scene some are simply outright demanding (had one guy ask Gazz to leave the room first ........ despite the profile saying extremely comfortable with threesoemes etc) or hostile (witnessed push go to PUSH at a party)Plus of course, with Bi guys Sheba may get a damn good old daisy chain a going and hell she loves that ;)

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RHP User

11 years ago

Quoting 'Futurenomads' Wow, Hope they have time to get a condom on, that has to be very very safe . Totally agree Future but in our experience those in the Bi scene are extremely conscious of the use of condoms and practice it with no (or at worst, extremely little) prompting where we find that within the heterosexual winging scene condom use is less prolific.

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RHP User

11 years ago

is why I love being a single girl .... that prefers parties ... with bi boys and girls ... and other naughty fuckers. After all I'm a social moron. Just get your gear off and jump in the mosh pit!!!

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RHP User

11 years ago

Quoting 'Meeka100'We all use condoms mate. You are the ones that don't like to use condoms. Besides I find that bi men are into lots of touching and foreplay... Plenty of time for condoms. ;-) \ Absolutely, We have played at parties, clubs etc where bi sexual stuff happens . Hell yes we had our condoms on for sure. You would be nuts not to.

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RHP User

11 years ago

Back to the OP question, we don't go to bars, clubs parties anymore. We like to meet couple to couple in a 4 star apartment. We all know we are there to play, pre dinner drinks, then dinner out back to the apartment some chatting. We like a game a strip poker...its fun girls against guys, winners of each hand both girls take something off the other girls husband. So the swapping is happening already in a fun way. At the end of the game...well someone is nominated entertainment officer and typically its "Lets have some fun" "Hit the bedroom" either swap on the way to bedroom or same partners getting the girls nice and wet with some fucking, licking etc. Then "Would you guys like to swap?" We have never had a No! There is no awkwardness at any stage or girl on girl, flirting in public but we enjoy every minute from the time we are getting ready to go out, till waking up the next morning extremely tiered ....think we are getting too old now going to sleep when the sun is coming up. Its the whole experience with great company in a mood of anticipation, not just the fucking.

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JohnAnn2227

11 years ago

I we are meeting a couple in a bar or club we have already emailed and talked on the phone. We have also swapped face and intimate pics with them that show exactly who we are and what we like. So when we actually meet them in person it is not a real surprise (sometimes a bit of weight and a change of hair colour has occurred!). We have a few drinks and just enjoy each others company. If we are local to home we invite them back for a spa. John has a sign that he hangs next to the spa "This spa is clothing optional...except after 9pm when clothing is banned!" Naked people in a spa leads to sex quickly. If we are staying in a hotel we invite them back for a massage. This usually works. Also I am very touchy and love to touch and rub the guys thigh while we flirt/ chat. John has often come back from the loo to find me having a pash with the guy. We haven't experienced stress because we have already chatted and "seen" each other in our glory! As far as condoms if it is not on it is just not on (for intercourse). Loosen up and enjoy!

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RHP User

11 years ago

What you describe is generally our MO. We don't see it as a problem though, since we prefer to meet first for drinks and play later. We try not to take anything for granted when meeting couples or singles, so there's no expectation that we will end up playing. We prefer to take the time at the beginning to ensure we're all on the same page. If it is going well (with singles in particular), Ms Shout tends to be on the front line, with Mr Tryst hissing unsubtley in her ear "touch his thigh, TOUCH HIS THIGH". There'll usually be a commitment to scheduling a date if we feel it's going well, and we're fairly upfront about it. When it comes to the actual playdate, we don't muck about. It's drinks, maybe 10 minutes on the couch, and then the action begins! I don't think we're capable of waiting hours at that point! Mr Tryst and Ms Shout

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How does your night of Swinging start with a couple.

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