F56
How to be successful
May 28 2013
Comments
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RHP User
12 years ago
Be honest with yourself about what you want & don't compromise with the people you meet. If they don't met your requirements or are not after the same thing. Don't meet them.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'Be honest with yourself about what you want & don't compromise with the people you meet. If they don't met your requirements or are not after the same thing. Don't meet them. ah but how much time do you invest before pursuing other avenues or realising goals may not be achievable. We all only have a limited span.
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RHP User
12 years ago
as Meeka said...but also.. be realistic.......about yourself, about your potential matches... be honest...creative is good, but outright deception isn't.... be polite.......manners still go a very long way.... be patient........meeting people is difficult, it takes time be flexible....... not all meets will end in play....actually...most wont...friends is still good.. be yourself...... be the 'real you'....show yourself, its who people really want to meet...
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RHP User
12 years ago
It also helps if you live in a big city or town. ⊂(◉‿◉)つ
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Mischeviouslad
12 years ago
Read a few profiles, with their promotion of their sexual skills, and overtly sex-self-promoting photos, and it appears that many guys would define getting laid as the benchmark of success.... but I feel that's a bit off the mark.... unless, getting laid is your benchmark of what you call success outside of this site too. And if that's how you define success, I'd suggest you'd be a pretty shallow, self absorbed type with little genuine interest in others. I see this place as an avenue for entertainment and just one additional means for communicating with and meeting others. What RHP is not, is my ONLY means of communicating with and meeting others. Get that straight in your mind, and the desperation factor that seems so prevalent in here due to having a defined goal of sex with a stranger.... is not a factor. Instead, focus on fun interactions and the rest becomes a more natural progression. DG- Posted from rhpmobile
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Paradisepair
12 years ago
# of real life encounters? # of events you enjoyed? # of dates that were awesome? # of forum flame wars you avoided? # of flirts or messages? Great ratio of come on's to knock backs?
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RHP User
12 years ago
for me is the same as 'success' in real life. Enjoy myself, learn a lot about people and do no harm. Oh and especially make up for lost time. ;-)
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RHP User
12 years ago
"If you expect nothing from anybody, you're never disappointed." Enter this world like you would any other: with an open heart, a positive attitude and plenty of self-esteem. If you arrive feeling closed off, jaded, or unworthy RHP will become your self-fulfilling prophecy. I have been very successful so far. Great dates, even better lovers and even some real friends.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Paradisepair' What is your KPI (Key Performance Indicator) for success here? The fact that I'm here every day with a smile on my face, looking forward to my next devious adventure.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Make friends, be happy, try some new things and talk openly about my sexual fantasies. Oh, and there should be some boobs in there somewhere. I like boobs.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad'Read a few profiles, with their promotion of their sexual skills, and overtly sex-self-promoting photos, and it appears that many guys would define getting laid as the benchmark of success.... but I feel that's a bit off the mark.... unless, getting laid is your benchmark of what you call success outside of this site too. And if that's how you define success, I'd suggest you'd be a pretty shallow, self absorbed type with little genuine interest in others. I see this place as an avenue for entertainment and just one additional means for communicating with and meeting others. What RHP is not, is my ONLY means of communicating with and meeting others. Get that straight in your mind, and the desperation factor that seems so prevalent in here due to having a defined goal of sex with a stranger.... is not a factor. Instead, focus on fun interactions and the rest becomes a more natural progression. DG- Posted from rhpmobile I get laid when I want sex. Nothing more for me at all though I have made some nice women friends and some nice male friends that I do not have sex with. I ohly came on rhp to find models for my exhibition and thats done and dusted. after some guy cleaned my pipes for me after three years of no sex I thought best to keep theold girl cranking over in case it closes up again.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Ms_Devious' "If you expect nothing from anybody, you're never disappointed." Enter this world like you would any other: with an open heart, a positive attitude and plenty of self-esteem. If you arrive feeling closed off, jaded, or unworthy RHP will become your self-fulfilling prophecy. I have been very successful so far. Great dates, even better lovers and even some real friends. Drop dead georgous, and sexy as hell your not the average women here honey, if you were not such a looker with your open outgoing personality and smarts. then you would not have the same experience as some old fat chick who cant string two words together and lives in a house full of cats , and only big day out is to centrelink shit I just wrote my own profile...the real one
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RHP User
12 years ago
I get your point. However, I will post my comment from a different thread here: My favourite mantra: You teach people how to treat you. I've read too many posts by members (just using women as an example) on here saying things like "The first message wasn't great, but I thought maybe that was just me. His second message was a bit rude, but I thought I'd give him a chance. He refused to talk on the phone but I accepted that, as perhaps he was a bit shy. And then the bastard stood me up! How dare he, all guys on here are the same!!" Yes ladies, maybe he is an arsehole, but if you let him treat you like one from the start then aren't you at least partly responsible for the outcome? I really wish more people realised their own issues dictate a lot of their experiences here.
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RHP User
12 years ago
We all make mistakes when we first join RHP or start dating. Maybe put up with behaviour we shouldn't. Hindsight is a wonderful thing... So as long as we all learn from that, that's the main thing. I will admit that joining RHP and meeting the people that I have has changed my life. I had never really had the opportunity to talk to people who were on my wavelength when it came to sex and relationships. I have learnt so much and the half baked ideas I used to have in my head have developed into something more solid thanks to some wonderful people that I have met and spoken to. :) My sex life and experiences are unrecognizable from three years ago when I first joined Red Hot Pie. I think you meet people for a reason and everyone can teach you something. Even if that is to show how you don't want to be!!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'We all make mistakes when we first join RHP or start dating. Maybe put up with behaviour we shouldn't. I'm not even talking about newbies. That's maybe what bugs me most.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yes I know what you mean. :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
my horizons have been expanded just by the discussions let alone actually meeting anyone just goes to show.. old dog
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RHP User
12 years ago
to success here is to be female.
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RHP User
12 years ago
For me success is meeting a new friend, where there is laughter regardless of anything else. That's why we are here isn't it? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Does that mean people expect nothing from me or that I don't dissappoint them....maybe I need to change my name 😝 Any
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sweetgem
12 years ago
In my case, I have made some real good friends, had awesomely memorable dates, become wiser from reading the Forums because there are so many wisdoms in here to learn from :-) I think first up one needs to have a clear head/mind, meaning there's no emotional baggage, before signing up to any sites, especially on RHP. Secondly, be a real grown up person and carry the right concept and attitude towards sites like RHP. Thirdly, make sure you know what you want out of it, be respectful and be genuine. I personally against anyone who has double standards, is a time waster, and the Forums all time favourite topic........CHEATING!!!- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'anybodyjustnow'Does that mean people expect nothing from me or that I don't dissappoint them....maybe I need to change my name 😝 Any I meant do not enter with a set plan of who you want and what you want, nor that other members will throw themselves at you. Remember the "I've been here two weeks, paid for a membership and still haven't had sex!" forums? And maybe the username (based on your previous one which was much better) makes it sound anyone will do. Let's come up with another?
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RHP User
12 years ago
Ms_D, thank you for lovely guidance and for the new name :-)
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RHP User
12 years ago
Though I still like the Miscellany one too.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Do guys really think they'll be successful with names like "suckmeoffbaby"? *Goes off to do a search* Ok, and there we have it. I did a username search to make sure any names I used here were not actual members, and typed in some pretty nasty suggestions. Guess what? They all existed. Go figure.
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RHP User
12 years ago
My name, I thought it was inspired, it says everything I need it to. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Mischeviouslad
12 years ago
How many guys use words in their chosen name to describe their penis, being athletic or fit, 4u, or things all-night. Maybe I should search to see if "fit6foot3cock&lickallnight4u"..is taken lol DG
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RHP User
12 years ago
I reveived a message from a couple calling me "pussy in boots" asking if I was interested. I wrote them a nice "thanks, but no thank you", only to receive a reply saying "so try with us and u .ll enjoying u .ll forget even ur name if u try trust me ??? " I replied: No is no I'm afraid. Then I got this: "baby why u afraid i like to meet u for drink or any think u like outside any place u choses i like to play with u women to women take a chance to have fun babe" Charming, but... what happened to "we"? Certainly an interesting change from the dozens of eloquent emails I receive everyday.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I must admit that my idea of 'success' on here has changed since I first joined about eight months ago. Living in a smaller city which is thousands of kilometres away from the nearest capital, I do find it difficult to find people that I actually want to meet, and I haven't met many people at all since joining. This is particularly the case when it comes to some of the less conventional things that I want to experience, and I think that a lot of those things will have to wait until the rare occasions these days that I can travel to the larger cities. I did - and still do - find this pretty frustrating, as I'm not a very patient person by nature and for awhile there I was ready to give the whole thing the flick. But then in the meantime I started posting more regularly on the forums, and began to meet some great people that way, and I discovered how much I enjoy being able to discuss and learn about all manner of sexual topics with other like-minded people, as I don't get to do that much in my 'real life'. So I would say that my time here has still been a success, but just not in the way that I originally hoped. I'm sure though, that one day I will get to experience all those other things, and that all the knowledge I've gained from other people on here will be very helpful in my future adventures.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting '50zkool'My name, I thought it was inspired, it says everything I need it to. - Posted from rhpmobile Why would you want to go back to skool when you're 50?
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad'Maybe I should search to see if "fit6foot3cock&lickallnight4u"..is taken lol DG You have 3 of them?
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Mischeviouslad
12 years ago
Man needs SOME sleep.... Miss MDG
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Ms_Devious' Quoting '50zkool'My name, I thought it was inspired, it says everything I need it to. - Posted from rhpmobile Why would you want to go back to skool when you're 50? Skool girls !
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Cheekyarses
12 years ago
I agree with the first few comments from MsD Success is measured in many forms - it's not the amount of notches on a belt - it's about how you can touch another persons life with positive energy, enjoy meeting new people n experiencing new n exciting opportunities! They say we only live once, but we live everyday - we only die once - success is what you make it!
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RHP User
12 years ago
With three cocks? You must be simply exhausted. Hehe ;-)
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Mr_MrsAraps
12 years ago
LD you put into words a lot of what I was going to say in terms of changed perspectives over time as to what I class as success. For me these days as a forum addict I have learned so much from everyone and have put all those devious ideas to very good use on MsAraps. So if I measure success on that level then yes it has been very successful.- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
learning to let people go to find their own way.
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RHP User
12 years ago
"Success is counted sweetest by those who ne'er succeed." Emily Dickinson.
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J_Rad22
12 years ago
Quoting 'Luckdragon23' I must admit that my idea of 'success' on here has changed since I first joined about eight months ago. Living in a smaller city which is thousands of kilometres away from the nearest capital, I do find it difficult to find people that I actually want to meet, and I haven't met many people at all since joining. This is particularly the case when it comes to some of the less conventional things that I want to experience, and I think that a lot of those things will have to wait until the rare occasions these days that I can travel to the larger cities. I did - and still do - find this pretty frustrating, as I'm not a very patient person by nature and for awhile there I was ready to give the whole thing the flick. But then in the meantime I started posting more regularly on the forums, and began to meet some great people that way, and I discovered how much I enjoy being able to discuss and learn about all manner of sexual topics with other like-minded people, as I don't get to do that much in my 'real life'. So I would say that my time here has still been a success, but just not in the way that I originally hoped. I'm sure though, that one day I will get to experience all those other things, and that all the knowledge I've gained from other people on here will be very helpful in my future adventures. Definatley if and most do (for some amount of time), rate the level of success on "getting some" then well...... depending on the circumstances most would rate their experience unsuccessful. My hometown lacks the variety available 600Km south haha.Since joining all those years ago, I've met like 1 person who had the same ambitions as myself and wasn't hung up on anything - we didn't get physical but it was more than enough to have someone to share ideas with. It's nice to connect with people and share ideas/thoughts/experience and expectations. For myself, having reasonable expectations goes hand in hand with "being successful"
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RHP User
12 years ago
Change your sex to female for a while and see how you go. :P
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RHP User
12 years ago
Think you have to have an open mindset and not take it too seriously. There is going to be hit and misses on here. Just take each experience for what it is whether good or bad, learn from it and move on.
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RHP User
12 years ago
along the the lines of Meeka's first post.If you know what you want and find someone (or couples, groups etc) that also want the same thing and want to do it with you that that's success. For me a success would be finding someone with whom I would be happy.
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RHP User
12 years ago
It's a sex site, so success for guys is getting laid, sounds like common sense to me. If laughing ang giggling is your goal, there are appropriate sites.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Ms D quoted something from another thread saying that the first message wasnt that great. I approach RHP similar to RL in that I wont walk up to a stranger in a shopping centre/club/pub etc & start rattling off a list of sexual statistic's or desirable attributes etc .......... I will say a simple" Hi, how are ya" & based on their responce add more & build a whole conversation. So I will & do send a simple Hi, how are you type thing as a first message on here, However I have found that most people (women) on here have lost (or never had) the ability to build a conversation. As to success that is as varied as each of us & our individual tastes/ needs/ desires.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Ms_Devious' "If you expect nothing from anybody, you're never disappointed." Enter this world like you would any other: with an open heart, a positive attitude and plenty of self-esteem. If you arrive feeling closed off, jaded, or unworthy RHP will become your self-fulfilling prophecy. I have been very successful so far. Great dates, even better lovers and even some real friends. What she said... Well put. Totally our philosophy! You rock!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Ms_Devious' Quoting 'Paradisepair' What is your KPI (Key Performance Indicator) for success here? The fact that I'm here every day with a smile on my face, looking forward to my next devious adventure. What she said again. U still rock...
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Darwin_Bread' Ms D quoted something from another thread saying that the first message wasnt that great. (...) I will say a simple" Hi, how are ya" & based on their responce add more & build a whole conversation. So I will & do send a simple Hi, how are you type thing as a first message on here, What I said then is that the "Hi, how are u" messages really don't do it for me and are usually an instant no. When contacting someone I write a relatively long and eloquent first message, relating to something I read in their profile. Getting a one-liner is not bad, it just tells me that the writer and I won't have much in common.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Ms_Devious' Quoting 'Darwin_Bread' Ms D quoted something from another thread saying that the first message wasnt that great. (...) I will say a simple" Hi, how are ya" & based on their responce add more & build a whole conversation. So I will & do send a simple Hi, how are you type thing as a first message on here, What I said then is that the "Hi, how are u" messages really don't do it for me and are usually an instant no. When contacting someone I write a relatively long and eloquent first message, relating to something I read in their profile. Getting a one-liner is not bad, it just tells me that the writer and I won't have much in common. I do see the point you make, but from a blokes perspective when about 80-90% of messages go unanswered or unreplied after awhile it seems a bit pointless to write a long elequant post as previous experience has taught us that fore mentioned 80-90% of messages are ignored, So I reverted back to how I approach someone in RL. It really does seem that we are damned if we pen a well structured message & damned if we dont. (And no it wasnt having a go at you Ms D but a comment in general)
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RHP User
12 years ago
I do receive some lovely emails (most around the 10 line mark) from members saying they liked my profile and telling me about them, their likes and experiences that would have been great... Except for the fact they never mention anything specific from my profile, nor my username. Nothing wrong with having a template for an initial message. Just personalise it a little for each person you send it to. And use their name!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Ms_Devious' I do receive some lovely emails (most around the 10 line mark) from members saying they liked my profile and telling me about them, their likes and experiences that would have been great... Except for the fact they never mention anything specific from my profile, nor my username. Nothing wrong with having a template for an initial message. Just personalise it a little for each person you send it to. And use their name! I hadn't thought of a template so a good idea, thank you
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RHP User
12 years ago
I don't think it matters how you define success - whether it is just getting laid or simply generating a stream of interactions with others that may or may not lead to more than a few emails exchanged .... the simple reality is as 50zkool stated - any meaningful measure of success requires that you simply be female (or ride the coat-tails of their gender as part of a couple)Sifting through piles of unsolicited emails on a daily basis "choosing" which one or two you will dignify with a response is not the experience many men enjoy while I suspect close to 100% of women do. Based on my experience so far and the comments of other men here, the generally experience is one of sifting through profiles, finding those that appeal, composing a thoughtful, relevant introductory email and then waiting in vain for even a cursory reply - most don't even get read. If we do get "chosen" and receive a 3 word reply I doubt many pick the semantics, tone, grammar or even content of the reply to pieces ... we just engage and pass those judgements later once a proper understanding of the other is gleaned.Note that 90% of the comments on this post are by women and couples who have little or no idea of the common experience of the vast majority of users on this (or any other similar) site.... of course more fool us for facilitating it. I console myself with the knowledge that nothing of any value ever comes easily.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I have only been here for a day and already three lovely men want to have sex with me.So wonderful to know there are some men who like much,much,much older women.One even invited me to his dungeon for a photo shoot....unfortunately I had to say no as the excitement would surely finish me off but I did give him Flo's contact details....she's a few years younger.
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RHP User
12 years ago
You crack me up, your profile is great, just love it that your here, tickles me rigid. And bodes well for the future, you go girl. x- Posted from rhpmobile
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sydney_tradie
12 years ago
IS BEING YOURSELF AND EXPECTING KNOCK BACKS NO MATTER WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE PEOPLE WILL BE ATTRACTED TO YOU AND FIND YOU NOT ATTRACTIVE ITS A BALANCE COS WITH MANY COUPLE A MAN MAY FEEL THREATEN AT TIMES SHARING HIS WIFE WITH A YOUNGER ATHLETIC LOOKING GUY BUT THEN THERES GUYS OUT THERE THAT TRUST THERE WIFE AND JUST WANT THEM TO ENJOY
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RHP User
12 years ago
Success is a completely subjective concept - my definition of success could be another's definition of failure it all depends what you are looking to get out of being on here.- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Getting your Caps Lock key unstuck.
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Mischeviouslad
12 years ago
A template? Miss M?! surely not! ;-) lol DGI
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad'A template? Miss M?! surely not! ;-) lol DGI Keep the part aimed at the lady original, always. But the part where you describe the things you like, the experiences you've enjoyed and things you'd like to try can be re-used, even if it needs a bit of altering for every person you send it. I've never done it myself, as I have contacted less than a handful of men on here.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I have instant posting privileges.
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Mischeviouslad
12 years ago
Quoting 'Ms_Devious' Keep the part aimed at the lady original, always. But the part where you describe the things you like, the experiences you've enjoyed and things you'd like to try can be re-used, even if it needs a bit of altering for every person you send it. And to think.... I was criticised for suggesting just such a method.DG
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RHP User
12 years ago
Well, I certainly don't have to sift through a hundred messages a day...but that's because I'm fussier these days. In the beginning (4 years ago now) I was more adventurous and had a lot more 'oomph' and confidence. Then I got knocked back by soooo many fellas who were arrogant, who thought they were sex on legs, who were not being honest, who turned out to have serious issues with treating women like crud. I can count my 'successes' on the fingers of one hand still, because a guy has to persevere if he wants to meet me. That being said, I met some nice men, made some happy memories and am still friends with the select few. If I took my measure of success as getting laid, I'd be a lot less successful than most men here, I reckon. But to be honest, I'd rather just meet someone nice, friendly and honest these days. It would make a seriously nice change. And if they were up for some sex too, that might round the evening off pretty well! :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Simple....am I experiencing pleasure and do I bring pleasure to other people.- Posted from rhpmobile
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