M63
How to improve my profile
January 03 2012
Comments
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RHP User
13 years ago
Open up a single girls profile...use the profile builder auto heading "very horny and in need of attention now"...include anal sex in your sexual interests, maybe gangbangs as well...in your main profile state you only want nsa sex, no names, no exchange of numbers etc. then watch the flirts and messages fill up your inbox...you don't need a pic..just the promise of no holes barred sex... If you do decide to exchange pics and they don't respond, well, at least you have satisfied the craving for attention...
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RHP User
13 years ago
You know, the 'right kind of woman' you are trying to attract, these don't grow on trees Stalkers !! For instance..... 1. She would ideally be built like a sweaty builder 2. Her armpits are not the norm for a delicate lady 3. Foreskin is optional on her........ 4. She would have to like frocking up occasionally even if she hasn't had a chance to shave those hairy legs (think this comes under the humiliation thing) 5. She would ideally have terrible narcolepsy....so that she falls forward every 5 minutes thus exposing her arse 6. Be into mangoes and other such supple fruits 7. She does not necessarily even have to be female for all of the above . See.......very small niche market, broaden your horizons, stop being so damn fussy
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RHP User
13 years ago
Point out the obvious....but nowhere in your profile name do you have the word 'stud' Cos that ALWAYS works !!!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Stalky, you make my cheeks ache! And you, DGT. Maybe we should get you a collar like Meeks'. "Studbait"
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'd like it too much
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'D_G_T' Point out the obvious....but nowhere in your profile name do you have the word 'stud' Cos that ALWAYS works !!! Just changed my handle tonight, and now my inbox is full!
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RHP User
13 years ago
It's working already
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RHP User
13 years ago
whaddya no?
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ruby_blossum
13 years ago
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RHP User
13 years ago
a little bit of wee just came out oohhhhh I have tears
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RHP User
13 years ago
to be stuuu-uuuds Yeah babe we gunna make ya studly lol
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RHP User
13 years ago
Erm, I mean Stalky!Bestest thread in ages, thanks love!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Have you tried the chloroform yet? That stuff isn't cheap you know, and it was the last of my stash.....I mean how am I supposed to pick up studs anymore? and I do mean that quite literally....one good whiff and down they go.....it's no easy pick up----and drag LOL
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RHP User
13 years ago
for informing the customer that keeps flirting with me that I know security personally and will use this to my advantage if they do not either put out or back off...?
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RHP User
13 years ago
You sound like a very decisive stud to my ears
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RHP User
13 years ago
Everyone knows ribbed is better
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RHP User
13 years ago
Try going out with a cockbait that might help you Stalkers :p You know since you are trying to be a good boy and all. ❤ Meeks ❤
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hang out in public toilets offering people lollies. That's not seedy. Some people would genuinely like a strawberries & cream while they do thie business and then they will know that you are a considerate person too! How could it fail?
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RHP User
13 years ago
Why are you trying to be a good boy and spoil all our fun?! Say it isn't so.....I have diddling fantasies to maintain here!...mmmmm....diddle, diddle, diddle
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RHP User
13 years ago
Everytime I see a pic of that tongue I just want to suck it while I bounce on that cock. Fill me up. Now sorry, what was the question ? :p----
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RHP User
13 years ago
Ok, cock later. Tongue first. That's too good a tongue to waste, it's gotta warm me up first
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RHP User
13 years ago
So glad to see the tongue back You seem to have got everyones attention and I made the mistake of peeking at your profile to see what assistance I could offer but alas all I could think about all day was you being spanked into pleasure Damm You I want to know more.But I think maybe you could offer up a little more in that profile of yours it seems a bit too much about you and your wants except from a bit of flirting I think the peeps wanna know whats in it for them Stalks.Will you be doing any riding and spitting and moaning.I think we need the COCK SHOT
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RHP User
13 years ago
Or is it studfest
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RHP User
13 years ago
Awwwhh thanks for the helpful suggestions (chloroform lmfao) ... and the naughty suggestive helpfuls! What a bunch of wicked women! Alas, still no offers in my inbox from straight guys. :(.... (I said at the outset I was desperate brizzyguy62, I never received my ticket to the Tropical Fruits Festival). I think Cockbait is onto something. I've tried dangling a carrot... what I need is a wing woman to lure in the straight guys then plaster 'em up with four beers and a discrete opportunity while my wing woman has them occupied. Has anyone seen that done? Always entertaining on a night out at Aarows when the desperados call in. It's ok though. I mean who hasn't woken up the next day thinking wtf? Why did I do that? Again? Damn. Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
Willing stunt bum / cockbait at your service Sir! So when they come and ask you "can I pork your wife/GF/slut buddy" you can say "of course, but she wants to watch me do you first." Now I have seen that being done :p
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RHP User
13 years ago
Lol! I never know whether to be offended or flattered but it is always very awkward when a dude asks "can I root your gf/wife/fuck buddy". I mean, its never up to me to say yes... it's just not my choice.... so I have a nasty self serving habit of automatically responding, "She likes to watch and if she likes the look of it she might join in...so would you like me to do you in the arse or the face?"..... I've chased off some very handsome young horny fuckable straight guys with that line damn it!! My moral compass is my own worst enemy! Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
LOL, wonder what would happen if you said "yep go ahead". But my vote is for both, in the face then the arse. You are too funny Stalkers. Oh and Brissydude, I have see his gaydar and it's a beauty!!! (ˆڡˆ) Meeka
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RHP User
13 years ago
Brizzyguy where's your sense of yoomar? Can you bend forward a little......I can't quite see your cubicle
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RHP User
13 years ago
lolz.. Brizzyguy62 (wait... does that make you 49 this year?) It's obviously a concern for you but my gaydar is working just fine mate. You're simply not my type. You know? As for Meeka, I doubt she has been anywhere near a men's toilet cubicle.... besides, everyone knows all the good action happens at the urinals. Each to their own, you know?HugsStalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
They all squeeze their ass cheeks in and scream de-nile de-nile de-nile everytime a juicy fat cock threatens their temple of poon
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RHP User
13 years ago
Brissydude, I am exactly what you see, what are you insinuating exactly? That I am a man? Well only on Saturday afternoons when I attached my bumdar, Now bend over while I tear you a new one :p
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RHP User
13 years ago
'toilet' sex is a fetish and along with many others I prefer to say each to their own, without judgement on their preference. I mean, have we judged you for being so vanilla? Toilet blocks seem the logical place for hosting watersports events too, great fun on a hot day . then again, I could just be taking the piss
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RHP User
13 years ago
George Michael and Allan Jones. Now that's funny! Plus you've only got to spend a couple of minutes on the squirt website to see just how frequent and prolific this activity is. Just saying... it isn't for everyone... but it's not news breaking. As for water sports.... how high can you piss chasing_box? On more than one occasion I've seen ladies trying to piss on those scent bricks! Hehe. Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
Awh.. My Friday night date cancelled on me. Do you think if I put my strapon on and go to the local dunnies anyone would notice? I am starting to see the disadvantages of a purple dong. Looked so cute in the shop. :((
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RHP User
13 years ago
That's because they want to move them without having to pick them up.......piss trough lollies are never in the right spot
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ruby_blossum
13 years ago
Those public toilets can be dark at night....
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RHP User
13 years ago
the nozzle on my douche is a lil glow in the dark number.........yeah beats the shit outa me too literally in fact
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ruby_blossum
13 years ago
those little boxes can be a dark place as well......
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RHP User
13 years ago
you're correct, public toilet sex is not funny......unless you are doing it with a clown. in which case it's hilarious.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Some one needs a nice soothing prostate massage and a nice hard cock up the arse to loosen up a little. Honey, you could have a stroke with that kind of stress in your system. Act now!!! Get fucked! ....erm....I mean..layed xx goodgrlz <
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RHP User
13 years ago
Damn stop it!! All this talky of moonbeams and latex gloves is making my balls roll with anticipation! You know I am attempting to control my urges... and these visual prescriptions are not helping me one lil bit! I'm going to have to double my quota for the evening. Better get another tub of man and beast! Hugs Stalky
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RHP User
13 years ago
What is funnier than clown sex though......is how people take being called vanilla an insult these days now THAT does tickle my fancy that....pass me some Rawleighs Stud_plug, this is gunna take a while.
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RHP User
13 years ago
i think the loo's at the local park see a bit of trade....did u want me to reserve a stall? stalky? brzzy? dgt? anyone ?? ... theres even a sharps bin for those annoying....'pricks'...... theres even an icecream dude...he'll have some 'nilla.......
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'caitsidhe' Open up a single girls profile...use the profile builder auto heading "very horny and in need of attention now"...include anal sex in your sexual interests, maybe gangbangs as well...in your main profile state you only want nsa sex, no names, no exchange of numbers etc. then watch the flirts and messages fill up your inbox...you don't need a pic..just the promise of no holes barred sex... If you do decide to exchange pics and they don't respond, well, at least you have satisfied the craving for attention... Dont most legit women who have these profiles dangle the carrot like this? LOL
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RHP User
13 years ago
They want us to book a-Head now Mike? what's the world coming to?
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RHP User
13 years ago
theres a turnstile now, and a ticket window..... lol..... and a little guy with a limp to see you to your booth.... its a real high class affair.... they even hose the floor once a month......i think...
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RHP User
13 years ago
I don't think booking ahead is unrealistic. Clowns have a lot of birthday parties to perform at too.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Feckin mungbeans never made sense to me. Moonbeams goes much better with peace and love in a puddle
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RHP User
13 years ago
2. Moonbeam 59 up, 57 down Slang for a woman's genitalia. Eddie: We were at the beach and this chick flashed he moonbeam at us. 2. Moonbeam 59 up, 57 down Slang for a woman's genitalia. Eddie: We were at the beach and this chick flashed he moonbeam at us. the "Urban Dictionary" is to blame for this, but........ MOONBEAM slang for a woman's genitalia Eddie:we were at the beach and this chick flashed her moonbeam at us. sounds good to me...wanna run with this one then??
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RHP User
13 years ago
THat's the cutest name for girlie pink bits i've ever heard!!!!!!! Apart from minnie mouse....but moonbeam is adorable!!! I love it! Right, that's it. I'm changing her name. Cunny, cunt, pussy, hole, slit, slash, gash etc. etc.. etc...the list goes on.......passe!!!!!!!!! passe!!! MOONBEAM it is! Except in a more "dark" setting where moonbeam isn't going to quit sound nasty enough.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Sounds like a date to me Chilli Willy! Oooh a Willi and a Moonbeam! Sounds Promising And boys who don't like anchovies?!? Gasp! Perish the thought!!! We'll just leave them munching on their mungbeans.......gawd......such a waste of flexibility if they can reach their mungbeans!!!! bahahahahaha!!!! My neck! Sticky willy on my neck...or chilli? hmmmmmm....ok go ahead... curiosity killed the moonbeam but i don't care
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RHP User
13 years ago
OMG the dick with the shining halo has come out. Yum!! Such a dirty boy :p Uploading Sexiness ... █████████110% Uploading Your HAWT.... █████████110% Meeka ♥♥
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RHP User
13 years ago
Well its very nice to see but I cant stop smiling and giggling with the deviat way you have chosen to expose yourself which suits very well with your characte.I am sure many straight men are also perving because its so meaty. lol
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Studly_McStud' Quoting 'D_G_T' Point out the obvious....but nowhere in your profile name do you have the word 'stud' Cos that ALWAYS works !!! Just changed my handle tonight, and now my inbox is full! If things drop off Stud, just wack a '69' in your profile name. That must yield results, because heaps of guys do it and everyone loves a mathematician!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Count! I meant count!!!! Well, stalkers, the only thing I see wrong with your profile, is, it's missing all the important lines. "my friends say I'm good looking but I'll let you be the judge of that" "just want a fuck is it so hard you frigid bitches" "NSA. Call me my number is listed" "no idea who I am or how to root or what I want but I'll get to this later even though it is obvious I've had the profile for years and I just can't be fucked". C'mon stalkers. Get real, man, you are waaaaay behind the cocktrain.
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