M55 F54
Is Monogamy Selfish? or Sexy?- Reasons Why Monogamy's Da Bomb
December 20 2012
Comments
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RHP User
12 years ago
Considering my track record, I need to try something new. monogamy obviously isn't working for me. But in theory, I'd prefer monogamy if I could find 1 woman to make me happy on all levels.
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RHP User
12 years ago
The trick is finding the rite person to "do it" with And so the search continues for the Elusive One
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RHP User
12 years ago
I have never been monogamous,have never found anyone that inspires me to embrace monogamy..er ,um so OP why are you here exactly, are you on a mission to convert the'' bonking as many as we can'' hoardes with a persuasive argument?
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RHP User
12 years ago
How could monogamy be selfish? In relationships I have always been completely mongamous. So thank god I'm not in one.
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Paradisepair
12 years ago
90% of the list can be achieved with your life partner, monogamous or not. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
We think its sexy, you can explore games together: eg watching porn movies....couples swapping....3somes...things that we can do with others. The to reality.....Hon I dont think I can do it with someone else in front of you... .....then to I love kissing you as another guy is inside me....can you lick my clit at the same time? Give it a miss for 6 months got too hard messed around too much....then back to swinging. Cant understand couples that play without ea other...not hot!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Funny Miss D I was almost scared to say thats me too so as i am not in a relationship i cant be defined that way...will it be the way of my future I had thought so....after being here....who knows???
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RHP User
12 years ago
what are you doing here on rhp ?
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RHP User
12 years ago
It's a choice.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'slinkey'what are you doing here on rhp ? Whoopsie!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Very good reasons and all...but....we just wanna fuck!! Not hard is it??
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Paradisepair' 90% of the list can be achieved with your life partner, monogamous or not. - Posted from rhpmobile I totally agree!I was reading this thinking "my hubby and i fulfill most of these!" and we have sex with others (both together and apart). Not sure what the point of the post is???!? Does this make me selfish or sexy?? Or neither LOL.
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Smilingwithfun
12 years ago
Why on here. Youve given 20 plus reason's to be faithfull yet you are posting & have a profile.Slinkey is right. You seem to be questioning yourself, a retorical question perhaps?
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JessicaRabbit
12 years ago
Or rather, hoping, that this is meant to be a little bit of a laugh, rather than a genuine attempt at convincing anyone, given the forum that he has chosen to post on... Dida xx
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RHP User
12 years ago
I thought that this was a light hearted bit of a joke and then there were a number of people saying they agreed, that when they are in a permanent relationship they prefer monogamy. Then there is the other school of reply that is "Why are you on here?" . The question is..... . Is monogamy sexy or selfish? . The OP is not about whether he wants to be monogamous, not trying to persuade others to become monogamous at all. Just is it sexy or selfish. For me it is not a choice at all. When in a relationship it is a given. . I DO NOT SHARE!!!!! . Yes monogamy is sexy.
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RHP User
12 years ago
We see the OP as a lovely couple, committed big time to each other. Being in a successfull long term married relationship. . They want to play, softly . ......Two couples same bed having sex with their own partners watching another couple having sex watching them, while they watch the other couple. Hey....that is swinging and would suggest a lot of couples are into that! . Its sexy and hot....read their profile ..very very genuine ......why suggest they dont belong here..........they do big time!
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RHP User
12 years ago
monogamy is sexy.....play together is sexy....... when couples do things openly and honestly, with each others full knowledge and blessing....thats sexy.......
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Cheekyarses
12 years ago
Mikenshell I agree with you! Well said xxx
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yes you nailed it DidacticTactics, purely tongue in cheek and evoking some fun candid banter if you didn’t get it by the topic or took the reasons given literally. And yes, thank you Futurenomads we wouldn’t be here if we were “cut and shut” in our beliefs. Not wanting to judge any ones choices or have ourselves judged either for reasons being here, or wanting to create a “shit storm”. But it is a topic that has been discussed both socially and medically in length. In the day and age of the Tiger Woods scandal and Arnold Schwarzenegger’s love child to name a few. There are arguments that the human being is hardwired with the desire for sexual variety from an evolutionary trait and to expect two people to conform to that notion is selfish and not natural. Where others argue that falling in love with someone, sharing everything with them, not just your body for the rest of your life is sexy. Yeah I know, for some people we just arrived at vomit central, but it's the truth. It’s a valid argument that been going on for quite a while.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Apologies for my poor formatting. I’m having a few issues with commitment.
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Mr_MrsJones
12 years ago
Both of us have thought for quite some time that many of the single people who hang around the adult dating / swing scene and who even engage in sex with couples or parts of couples regularly (especially the males) are really only marking time until they find 'the one' and then they will follow the monogamous path. Some of the answers on here have certainly confirmed this theory. Yes each to their own and all that stuff but really I feel this is a bit hypocritical. You want to fuck some guy's wife but if you had one you wouldn't allow her the same freedoms? And single guys wonder why they have such a hard time. Mrs Jones.
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RHP User
12 years ago
With the line..."Monogamy sounds like some type of wood"..~laughs~
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RHP User
12 years ago
some people are naturally monogamous,there is a monogamy gene according to a Swedish study, but only a few men have it.Interestingly no women.Monogamy is definitely a choice and if one person provides you with emotional,physical and intimate connection then that is indeed sexy.But for many people one person is not able to provide all of that.If you have found that your partner fulfils your sexual and emotional needs ,then OPs you are extremely fortunate. Perhaps monogamy is selfish when one half of a couple for some reason is not having their sexual needs met and their partner is unwilling to explore alternatives . Sometimes people are just not sexually compatible although they tick each other's boxes in every other way. I think that many people make compromises in their relationships because they want their partner to be happy,and want to maintain their families so they forgo sex. Some people want to maintain the primary relationship but seek to fulfil their sexual needs by having affairs,indulging in porn, or seeing a prostitute. Some couples explore their sexuality together by playing together or seperately,this perhaps keeps thier relationship vibrant and interesting but it seems that a lot of trust is involved and can be tricky for some. Yes monogamy is sexy and yes monogamy can be selfish,it just depends on individual circumstances.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Monogamy is BORING It was created to control us. We wernt meant to be with one partner...so why pretend you can be happy with one? Honesty starts with yourself :>
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xFunlovingx
12 years ago
I got the humour in it...funniest thing I have read in a while....thanks for the giggles! xFunlovingx
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mr_MrsJones'Both of us have thought for quite some time that many of the single people who hang around the adult dating / swing scene and who even engage in sex with couples or parts of couples regularly (especially the males) are really only marking time until they find 'the one' and then they will follow the monogamous path. Some of the answers on here have certainly confirmed this theory. Yes each to their own and all that stuff but really I feel this is a bit hypocritical. You want to fuck some guy's wife but if you had one you wouldn't allow her the same freedoms? And single guys wonder why they have such a hard time. Mrs Jones. we saw that ....but does it have to be a guy wanting to fuck anothers wife? what about the women who openly play with other womens partners, or indeed with other women..... but scorn the idea of their own partners playing ?..... isnt there a huge hypocrisy here as well? mike.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Most of the singles that attend our club and become couples, still live the lifestyle and still play actively together as couples.Leesa
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'couplesint'Most of the singles that attend our club and become couples, still live the lifestyle and still play actively together as couples. Leesathats great leesa..... i've always said that couples who are open and honest with each other.....especially about sex, have the happiest relationships.....beginning a relationship with such transparency must add to their time together.....it certainly has made ours a whole lot stronger........
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RHP User
12 years ago
If so why are we all here ?I believe we were not meant to be monogamous.....we all have sexual desires for many different people and why shouldn't we act upon it.Not all animals mate for life......we shouldn't either.The more the merrier.....bring it on.Life is way too short to just fuck one...lets fuck them all.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'SSexyElla' Not all animals mate for life......we shouldn't either. We would suggest monogamy means one partner for life and we play with others together, never apart on a causual basis...Lots of animals do mate for life.
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RHP User
12 years ago
people do understand that the opposite of monogamy is NOT promiscuity? its more like polygamy, or polyandry...and who here, really has the resources, time or energies, to set up and maintain multiple 'full time' relationships with others? relationships that may well entail or include full households...including children, and a damned dog? or that might entail bedtime being a group thing.....every single night of the week? we arent designed to run multiple side by side relationships....not seriously, and certainly not efficiently. guys...imagine being harangued by not one, but multiples of demanding dissatsified women....sound like fun? and girls....imagine being menstrual..or even menopausal....and having a multiple of males to deal with.....sounds like a picninc? no...i dont think so... we are designed...by nature, to be monogamous, and have been since caring for our young became a two person operation..... i like having the 'one' woman to go home to, the 'one' woman to share the mundane and unexciting with, and the 'one' woman to devote my time, my energy and my attention to........ i like having 'one' family....and i like knowing who their father is, and who their grandfather is...i find it to be satisying and just a tad 'defining'....this is 'my' family, and the only males i share that luxury with.....are my sons.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Futurenomads' Quoting 'SSexyElla' Not all animals mate for life......we shouldn't either. We would suggest monogamy means one partner for life and we play with others together, never apart on a causual basis...Lots of animals do mate for life. its about 'choice'........we can choose, animals cannot. for animals its a necessity bred into them since time began...sex for procreation...... we have volition and coscious choice, and have sex for 'fun'.....makes us unique........
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RHP User
12 years ago
Lol polyamory is what I am....some of you have no idea how things work..is all I have to say. Lol Leesa
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RHP User
12 years ago
And. It gets better, I have 2 relationships and I am monogamous to both guys . Figure that one out..lol
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RHP User
12 years ago
have sex for fun and comfort,the females are also bi-sexual and very noisy lovemakers
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RHP User
12 years ago
Leesa, You are very lucky having a permenant relationship with two guys and the guys are happy sharing the same lady between them....enjoy
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RHP User
12 years ago
Leesa, You are very lucky having a permenant relationship with two guys and the guys are happy sharing the same lady between them....enjoy
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'couplesint'And. It gets better, I have 2 relationships and I am monogamous to both guys . Figure that one out..lol we applaud you for being a success....hats of to all three of you!
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RHP User
12 years ago
I figured this was meant to be a joke, it just failed and wasn't funny. The 'sexy' version of a dad joke
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'couplesint'And. It gets better, I have 2 relationships and I am monogamous to both guys . Figure that one out..lol Not really possible considering that the definaition of monogamy is... Having only one husband or wife... Not putting you down for your choices at all...after all it is your life. Polyamory I can accept and maybe your partners are in a monogamous relationship but you Leesa...are not!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Butt Handmaiden, Just saying, we see so many conventional meanings changed here eg, swingers ...now include singles Straight ..now means it includes sex with males. To be Bi you must be in love with the opposite sex and want to live with them... So why not broaden the term monogamous ...Leesa is commited to two guys in a permenant relationship, seems to meet the meaning to me.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Butt Handmaiden, Just saying, we see so many conventional meanings changed here eg, swingers ...now include singles Straight ..now means it includes male / male sex. To be Bi you must be in love with the same sex and want to live with them... So why not broaden the term monogamous ...Leesa is commited to two guys in a permenant relationship, seems to meet the meaning to me.
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RHP User
12 years ago
While you have a list of the benefits you fail to list the negatives, therefore I think your question is agenda based & as such pointless
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yes I am, I don't need to explain myself as no one ever understands unless you are in our position, you could never understand what I mean. But I am monogamous to each of my relationships.just because there are 2 of them doesn't mean Enough said. Leesa
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'couplesint'Yes I am, I don't need to explain myself as no one ever understands unless you are in our position, you could never understand what I mean. But I am monogamous to each of my relationships.just because there are 2 of them doesn't mean Enough said. Leesa Doesnt matter how you qualify what you have Leesa, or even what you call it..... from our point of view......its sexy.....not for us, but sexy anyway, and what makes it even sexier is that its out in the open and honest...the two men you are intimate with.....are your men, not someone elses....how sexy is that? lol.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Classic..Bloody funny
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'couplesint' Lol polyamory is what I am....some of you have no idea how things work..is all I have to say. Lol Leesa I ll start with you couplesint....I know exactly what is the meaning of polyamory and with out google it. However i think you misunderstood the meaning of monogamy... And literally "monogamy" means one spouse at time....never in the same time...which means you have to get merried this spouse.. So are you merried those two guys???.... I think not... You can say faithful or in love or any other imaginary word from any english vocabulary...your call :) (I do not underestimate your knowledge or you. Just playing with what you re saying :) )As for the rest....monogamy does not mean one spouse for your rest of your life....At least not in the vocabulary that originally came from :) Monogamy means one spouse at time and if we choose to have multiple sex parteners while we re in a marriage, then we commit adultery unfortunally according to religion. Otherwise out of marriage status it's a big big party :) but not even polygamy it's polyamory or vice versa. And for the animal kingdom there re some spices that they do sex only for fun. If it is not just a game of words, I have no words to say because i have never been a monogamus... Faithful yes. Not being shared or sharing my partener while in a relationship. :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
Thanks mike, it seems you understand, and it is just as you say. :) So some of you have one partner and you are monogamous to him or her, Well I have 2 that I am monogamous to and they to me.. No difference. Christos: Unless you walk in my shoes for a week, you cannot understand what I mean. You can go to the dictionary and look it up and you would still not understand so don't pretend to. Leesa xxx
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RHP User
12 years ago
I value honesty over monogamy...;)- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
"Selfish" is a very generic term. Anything someone wants for themselves can be construed as an example of selfish behaviour. Wanting an exclusive relationship is neither right nor wrong. The same is true of wanting a non-monogamous relationship. The primary consideration should be whether or not that type of relationship is mutually acceptable. If all people involved want a monogamous relationship then there is not a problem. If there is a difference in opinion then there are choices that have to be made. The same could be said for someone who does want monogamy. If they have, or are considering having, a non monogamous partner then that person needs to decide whether or not he or she can be comfortable with non-monogamy. If not, that person should preserve his/her sanity and leave or avoid that relationship. Sometimes we get stuck on what's normal, what's right, what's wrong, Well, maybe what's right to you is wrong to me. Some people probably can't even begin to imagine the kind of stuff that goes on in certain type of relationships. So who are we to judge? What counts at the end of the day is everybody being happy without compromising our and others integrity. Neither monogamy nor non monogamy is selfish in an unreasonable sense. Breach of mutually agreed upon boundaries is unreasonably selfish. So there is no judgement here, it’s a matter of you own personal choice/opinion and what suits you best.
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madotara69
12 years ago
Finally found someone interested with lawnmowers, well said. It is a real tease when she says "wait until i have finished mowing the lawns lover boy". It is then,without doubt in the relationship, a matter of responsibility to upgrade the mower for the fastest type you can afford. ohhh and chocolate. pfft diamonds and pearls.
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Zsuza69
12 years ago
Very true all that you have listed also what you havent said about monogamous relationships are:1: Yes you can fart in bed without upsetting the other person but better to make someone fanny fart when you first meet them.2: Gets boring after a while and you dont mean too. 3: Becomes expected on a friday/ Saturday night and not wanted / expected on a say Monday night or Lunchtime4: non spontanious5: Becomes routine therefore boring6: Yes you tried every position and found the one just right for you both but that aint necessary the right position for everyone, better to try a few people and find WOW it can be fun in a different position.7: The wet spot. You only worry about it when you are in a monogamous relationship when your not who cares where the wet spot is as long as there is one lol8: when tired you go to sleep. When tired and someone new wants you well sleep can wait lol9: Whats with all those cushions?10: Cushions get used for pillow fights when inbetween sex sessions when 3 or more in bed11: You cant have two cocks at once (unless you live on a farm)12: Four boobs are better than 213: Need i go on??????14: Ends in DivorceNeed i say more
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madotara69
12 years ago
Quoting 'Zsuza69' Very true all that you have listed also what you havent said about monogamous relationships are:1: Yes you can fart in bed without upsetting the other person but better to make someone fanny fart when you first meet them.2: Gets boring after a while and you dont mean too. 3: Becomes expected on a friday/ Saturday night and not wanted / expected on a say Monday night or Lunchtime4: non spontanious5: Becomes routine therefore boring6: Yes you tried every position and found the one just right for you both but that aint necessary the right position for everyone, better to try a few people and find WOW it can be fun in a different position.7: The wet spot. You only worry about it when you are in a monogamous relationship when your not who cares where the wet spot is as long as there is one lol8: when tired you go to sleep. When tired and someone new wants you well sleep can wait lol9: Whats with all those cushions?10: Cushions get used for pillow fights when inbetween sex sessions when 3 or more in bed11: You cant have two cocks at once (unless you live on a farm)12: Four boobs are better than 213: Need i go on??????14: Ends in DivorceNeed i say more sorry we can't be bothered getting divorced, spiced things up getting the ride on mower.isn't mahogany a type of timber used for steering wheels? Do it together and do it well please go on, this is getting raunchy
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RHP User
12 years ago
LOL! You lot are hilarious! But really, how can any of us sit in judgement on anyone? Unless you've walked in the shoes of others then I don't believe you're in a position to judge. I say stop putting labels and names to everything we say and do in life. If you're happy in your monogamous marriage then toddle along and be happy in it. What's it matter to you if other people have one or more relationships at a time? Does it affect you or how you sleep at night? And who said that we all have to have a monogamous relationship to "fit in" with what society deems to be acceptable? Just another way to force opinions on to others. Why can't we all just share the love and accept people for who/what they are? Why does one way have to be better than the other? It's so strange to think that just because you're happy to be in a monogamous relationship that everyone else should be too? Heather xox
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RHP User
12 years ago
Hello Lisa,First I d like to point that I am not judging you or even criticise what you ve choose in your life... I have my own shoes to walk with them and I really really like them. I am never never pretending something that I can't be or in this case pretend to understand the way you choose to live. All I was saying was what realy means monogamous and what re the requiments. However i ll use Moliere's expression of tolerance.. "I disagree with what you re saying but i would give my life for you to got the right to say whatever you think".... how is that....?Happy new year and all the best to you and to your life
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RHP User
12 years ago
I ve sould be more carefull
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