M41
It’s hard to find a lady
December 30 2019
Comments
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RHP User
5 years ago
What your fantasies are appeal to you but may not appeal to the ladies. If u want to show your genuine remove the hookups. Put in your profile that your looking for a date for events u have to attend. Your not getting what u said u want. Because your profile does not say it. But thats just one opinion from an old duck.
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RHP User
5 years ago
You’re available in “Ballarat, Geelong and Melbourne”?? Are you a Cabaret show or something?? Or is it you can’t quite make a decision about where to pop up next?? And you’re confused about why women tho k you’re a blow and go?? Mr dragon
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RHP User
5 years ago
Oh thanks for the advice. I’ll definitely take it on board. I live in Ballarat, ocean Grove and also Melbourne
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Kokoflamingo
5 years ago
Omit the "I want 5 women at once" and "hookup"s, I agree with Moan-a-lisa. First impressions mean a lot. Other stuff you can talk about once you establish a connection. Good luck!
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nightingale8
5 years ago
Many if not most single ladies don’t want to be treated as a ticket to sleeping with others, especially if you haven’t met and gotten to know them well first. Many couples don’t want opportunistic men sleeping with the wives and girlfriends. In some ways coming to a party with another girl is a validation at least one person finds you acceptable. If you’ve bypassed that unspoken check then it’s generally frowned upon. Slow it down and focus on her, relationship or not. Or join a gangbang group.
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RHP User
5 years ago
Love how you’ve taken all the feedback on board and have changed your profile to be much more to what you want.
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RHP User
5 years ago
Hi friends Well it's not hard to find goods ladies but responsible man is scares! We need good one out there ❤❤😍
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RHP User
5 years ago
Your profile is much more appealing and the other ladies gave some great advice too. Except Mr Dragon must not have had his coffee yet.😜
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SpicyKale
5 years ago
Chriscat, exactly! That's why we generally avoid profile tip threads... although you do run the risk of looking same same and blending in after taking advice on here.
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Sawadee
5 years ago
As honest and great a guy you may be. Truth remains you are still viewed as a single male out for a easy root . You can thank all the dickheads who proceeded you for this. Having a single profile myself , l know what the majority way of thinking is . So l dont bother.. If by chance I hit it off with someone ' i think Im lucky. Thankfully , i dont have this issue in the real world..
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non_such
5 years ago
As a guy looking at your profile photos i was reminded of the Seinfeld joke about people assuming you are gay because you are 'thin, single and neat.' Then i saw that you list your orientation as 'experimental' Maybe some ladies are jumping to the conclusion that you are a gentleman's gentleman.
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MsSuperFoxy
5 years ago
you are a crack up. 😄😅 Ms Foxy
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non_such
5 years ago
You are not necessarily a gentleman just because you describe yourself as one. it's like when women describe themselves as classy. It's not classy to call yourself classy. Similarly a gentleman is defined by his actions, not his words, and it is up to others to decide whether you are one. Maybe rather than saying you are a gentleman, describe the values that are important to you: manners, sincerity, authenticity, thoughtfulness, generosity.
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SpicyKale
5 years ago
Maybe someone that describes someone as a "gentlemans, gentleman" runs the risk as coming off a bit bigoted 🤷♂️ Always seems to be other guys that have issues with the experimental tag rather than the ladies on here from our experience. Always the exceptions with everything though....
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countrytouch82
5 years ago
Mr Dragon I am also happy to meet in Ballarat, Melbourne, Geelong, also Bendigo, and everywhere in between. I don't remember being a cabaret show although I could probably do with being an exhibit :p
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MsSuperFoxy
5 years ago
You think it's difficult finding someone to go to parties/clubs with.. Try being a woman wanting the same thing. The last guy I invited to a club, well....... Let's just say was a total elegant Dick, full of substance. 😉😂 Ms Foxy
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RHP User
5 years ago
Country... You don’t claim to live in all of them though... It just seems weird to me 🤷🏻♂️
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Home_Eric
5 years ago
Just heard from a woman who said she was struggling to find a date out to a swingers event - despite having an absolutely slamming bod. Why the shyness from guys do you think Foxxy? Fear of being seen by others?
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RHP User
5 years ago
Just because a guy is experimental doesn’t mean he’s gay and because a guy is neat and takes pride in his appearance doesn’t either. My point of the whole this is that I find it hard to show the ladies I’m a respectful and loving guy that still believes in chivalry. Most guys are not nice to ladies anymore.
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SpicyKale
5 years ago
OP, couldn't agree more with the first part of your last post Don't know you or how you're messaging to comment on the last bit. I don't think there's any magic elixir we can give you. After time you'll work out what people respond to. Don't try and be someone else online, it will fail miserably on you when you meet in person. Get along to meet and greets and observe how people interact in the scene. You might find you do better face to face anyway. Good luck!
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MsSuperFoxy
5 years ago
I'm not sure if it is shyness. Ms Foxy
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non_such
5 years ago
I wasn't suggesting you were gay or being bigoted. Just playing devil's advocate. You say that you are looking for a woman to accompany you to parties. You describe yourself as experimental. I interpret your profile as wanting a woman to accompany you to parties to get you through the door as a couple to then allow you to play with others. That seems rather mercenary and at odds with ideas of old-school chivalry.
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SpicyKale
5 years ago
Not sure I follow🤷♂️ This is RHP, not ok Cupid. We go to parties with other couples, I'm not sure if I see a huge difference. If you get off playing in groups, what's wrong with looking for fwb swinging partner on here? I don't think the OPs profile comes across like he's looking for an entry ticket. If you can't look for something like that on here, where can you? We've come across quite a number that have met on here, or one of the other sites that have done exactly what the OP is looking for. While a lot of us see this place as more than a sex site, I don't think many are on here looking for a future marital partner either. You might not have meant to come across as bigoted, but you did a mighty fine job of it
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non_such
5 years ago
I road tested the OP's profile with some friends: two gay male friends and two straight female. I wanted to see if I was barking up the wrong tree.both gay friends thought that if this guy wasn't bi or gay, he was only three drinks away from it. Both said they wouldn't mind having a crack at turning him.one gf described the profile as 'metrosexual', which is a word I haven't heard in a long time and hoped never to have heard again. She said she wouldn't date a guy who spends longer in front of the mirror than her.The other gf said the profile sounded like Nice Guy Syndrome: describes himself as a gentleman; devoted to your pleasure; nobody will love you like he loves you; old school values etc. He is a nice guy up until he is rejected, then you discover he's not such a nice guy after all. She said she sees a lot of profiles like that and skips over them because they sound insincere. Plus she's been on the end of snarly abuse in the past.
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SpicyKale
5 years ago
Keep digging😉 Might be time to let this one lie
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Mischeviouslad
5 years ago
@non such You almost made that sound like you actually know all those people and it wasnt just your own opinions just to have a stab at someone Almost 😎
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SpicyKale
5 years ago
ML, don't you know it's ok to put homophobic comments online if you're just quoting your gay mate and a girlfriend 😂 It's bad enough on here for the single guys without other single blokes tearing into them too 😐
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Kokoflamingo
5 years ago
I had to read that twice. He is 3 drinks away from being gay? Far too nice so he must be a secret psycho. What a load of nonsense. Ive met a few " nice" guys off here who are now good friends. You have some very cynical friends there. If, indeed, it actually happened.
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SSExplorer
5 years ago
I knew a gentleman once, had it all going for him, deep baritone voice, very handsome, very well educated and hung like a donkey. He was very smooth and by all accounts a nice guy to talk to. He would pop up and couples parties and would throw a lot himself, always had a willing, young, hot “girlfriend”. Was soon apparent - as the gf changed so regularly - that this guy would smooze lovely girls into the scene as he just loved fucking other men’s wives. I guess that’s ok for him but using his charms in a rather deceitful way just wasn’t right. When a couple goes to a couple party they are choosing to play with other real couples only, if they wanted to play with singles then they’d invite them. So if you’re partnering up just to get into couple parties then you are being deceitful to the whole group
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RHP User
5 years ago
it's like when women describe themselves as classy. It's not classy to call yourself classy. Similarly a gentleman is defined by his actions, not his words, and it is up to others to decide whether you are one.
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Forus1234
5 years ago
You can always go with a couple! Just think of how much fun you would have! 😈
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RHP User
5 years ago
Behave like a gentleman and not your average arsehole. Just be aware that gentleman does not equal doormat/wallet/gullible.Trust is a two way street and has to be earned and developed which takes time, be earnest, patient and forthright and above all think with the large brain.
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mango69er
5 years ago
Dont know about this. Asking advise, and putting in what others tell you. Are we getting the real you. Or a manufactured you. Just put in what you want in your profile. If your ture to yourself your ture to others
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nqbeaches
5 years ago
Get neat and tidy and try the supermarket isles when all the kids back at school. Always a hot Milf looking forward to a nice lunch and intimate relaxing afternoon to break the monotony
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non_such
5 years ago
Koko: I wasn't talking about nice guys. I was talking about Nice Guys. Not the same thing.
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Mischeviouslad
5 years ago
Kirt..... please do not make sweeping statements about “most guys” to try to elevate yourself above others You cannot speak to the actions of the collective. Thanks
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RHP User
5 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Kirt..... please do not make sweeping statements about “most guys” to try to elevate yourself above others You cannot speak to the actions of the collective. Thanks The sites champion cock blocker.That's fucking hilarious.
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Mischeviouslad
5 years ago
Point of Order, your worship I dont cock block anyone I merely point out how some cock block themselves through their own self sabotage, so that thry may learn from the error of their own failure 😎
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RHP User
5 years ago
Hi everyone yes I'm a newbie can you help me with my profile I find it hard describing myself standard tradie lol
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flimac
5 years ago
Having exchanged messages with you I can probably provide some insight, but please take it in the way it's meant which is to assist in your search and not a criticism. Reply regularly, dont leave it too long, women tend to have options here so we move on if the chat is slow in speed and content. Engage in conversation in your messages it's how we filter out the genuine and the creeps. And maybe rein in the "nice guy" responses, it's very easy to blame women cause you're a "nice guy" and women allegedly don't want that, it's a red flag behavior
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RHP User
5 years ago
Would love an opinion from some ladies about how I can improve my profile.
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MissRedFox
5 years ago
Go to events that allow single guys and socialise with people. There are many men who want a lady to go with but the harsh reality is women can go on their own or once they've been on the scene have a network of male friends they can take Take a plunge and get out there - you'll have much better luck on the scene XX
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GoodKarma
5 years ago
Just be yourself.. develop kindness towards others.. generosity.. don't be bothered by thoughts of others.. be grateful for what you have.. do fun things in your every day life.. find out what you like to do.. don't be ashamed .. don't expect others to give you anything.. treat others like you wanna be treated.. yeah that's about it! In the end you'll be happier and won't need the ladies but they'll come swarming anyway. :)
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Curvesnextdoor
5 years ago
Your profile is fine but it’s a flag for me to see when guys are looking for a partner to get entry to clubs.
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RHP User
5 years ago
You are not alone here as a male on RHP. First thing to remember is that women are out numbered by lots of guys so competition is tough. Generally I feel that not all women want a physical encounter and spend a lot of time flirting without any real intention of meeting. Call it flattery or ego building but Im sure many guys would agree with me here. So dont feel so bad, its really a numbers game. Probably better off in a club or bar at night.
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kle58
5 years ago
I like your profile and your photos have an aesthetic edge to them. Did you revise your profile after others made their comments? Don't try to please everyone, be true to your own self. Be honest. It's not uncommon for a guy to ask ladies to be their partner or date for a party or special event. I have been asked this several times. Good luck with it all. Kaz
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melbcpl01
5 years ago
First off single women don't need to have a guy to get into a swingers club and in most cases they get in free or a very minimal cost . Single guys often try to use a female as a door ticket to get into couple only nights and you can spot them a mile away . Our advise is go to nights that have single guys don't try using a female as a door ticket to get a cheaper entry cost
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Mischeviouslad
5 years ago
Adelaidesteve...... Im going to agree, yet disagree Sure, there would be those in here who really have no intention if meeting. Or, those whose life circumstances mean they are incapable of it as theyd wish... iE, the large number of married/attached people who dont disclose their relationship and pose as a single in here But..... if someone is suitably curious, intrigued and then inspired sufficiently..... the desire to meet becomes somewhat inevitable. My view is that guys tend to think differently, especially in here. They see a photo, want to fuck it, and that defines a very linear mindset and approach. Communication is issued solely around that as an agenda and expect it to be successful “because this is s sex site” And the self described nice-guys dont understand this either. They hide their sexual being but in here its still implied. And thats the thing. Its implied. So i believe that guys need to learn how to hold an empathic view of how women think, rather than how they themselves think and expect his thoughts to work like hers and for her to respond the same way he does Heard the phrase “know thy enemy”? Well women are certainly not my enemy, but understanding is knowledge, and application of knowledge is key in all things The point in all this ramble is to learn about communication, EFFECTIVE communication, and know how to create curiosity, interest, inspiration and desire.... Life holds too much fun to worry about those people who arent available to your world
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Hightimeforlove
5 years ago
Of course we all think of ourselves as gentlemen. But it reminds me of something Margaret Thatcher said. "Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't!" Lol.
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RHP User
5 years ago
To be honest I would not believe anybody on this website was here for something other than a hook up. It is targeted as a swingers and hook up dating app not a serious relationship dating app. So I guess I would try and assess what you really are wanting. Meaning no disrespect to members!
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MsSuperFoxy
5 years ago
I know quite a few singles who did became "coupled profiles", who have met through this site. IMO, A few of those "couples" are now married, and have had children. If that's not serious then I don't know what is. Lol! Yes, there are some who want "hook ups" and meaningless sex and will root who ever. That's OK, if they don't take people or relationships seriously. The advertisement if this site has nothing to do with they way people treat each other. At the end of the day, it is a business and marketing adults who enjoy sex. Don't we all. It is quite addictive. Lol! Ms Foxy
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cat_n_the_hatter
5 years ago
ML - “So i believe that guys need to learn how to hold an empathic view of how women think, rather than how they themselves think and expect his thoughts to work like hers and for her to respond the same way he does. Heard the phrase “know thy enemy”?… learn about EFFECTIVE communication, and know how to create curiosity, interest, inspiration and desire.” This is exactly why I don't give advice. Making mistakes and discovering them for yourself should be of great value. To have someone else to point out your "mistakes" is a shortcut of the process…. and we are all different. I agree Foxxxy- This place is what you want it to be. Life presents innumerable possibilities for love or friendship, but we must be willing to give in order to receive. (Ms)
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RHP User
5 years ago
Unfortunately Kirt, most women on here are only wanting to flirt without any intention of meeting. Maybe its their ego or they just get their rocks off by the attention.
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SpicyKale
5 years ago
Steve, what do you base that bit of wisdom on? As everyone keeps saying on here, there's a huge numbers inbalance for the guys on here. A quick look at our message history tells me we've played with less than 0.5% of the people we've exchanged messages with. That could have meant they're not interested, we're not interested, or schedules could never be lined up. We might only do something once every couple of months... lives are busy. It doesn't make us any less a swinger though! Also doesn't mean we're just here to flirt, guessing a lot including single women are probably the same🤷♂️
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MsSuperFoxy
5 years ago
It just might have something to do with your rocks hanging out. I just love that ego boost. 😍 😝😜 Ms Foxy
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RHP User
5 years ago
Steve, I do agree with you as far as experience goes. In the past as a couple with my ex partner, have met wonderful people yet as a single guy ladies a too quick to say no without finding out the gentleman I am. My whole question was not about my profile, but about why is it hard for a guy that still believes in chivalry and respect for woman. Find it hard to find a lady to enjoy an evening out at a swing event without being stood up or judged as a guy that’s an arsehole. It’s hard to woo a lady by message rather than in person but most wont give you that chance. I am always 100% honest and would only ask ladies I think I may have a connection with but people are too quick to judge a book by its cover. I love pleasing ladies but if I am with a lady that wants to play with myself and other men then I’m experimental. Does that answer everyone’s questions. Thank you all for the honest feedback.
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RHP User
5 years ago
I'm looking for a wild women to meet catch go to swingers party's with but instrest if I go alone they'll think I'm desperate
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RHP User
5 years ago
It’s hard enough finding hung good looking guys locally let alone trying to find a woman lol
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RHP User
5 years ago
I've taken guys to parties before, only to be embarassed by them. They behave like predators and don't have my back when some other guy is inappropriate.
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partylikeits2020
5 years ago
Hey Kirt, I luv going out live music etc and generally finding new and interesting places and people, I think if you maintain ur genuine reasons to go out as freinds and practise what a lot of guyz dont do when they go out with ladies with alterior motive, geting laid etc which most ladies have to deal with on the net for starters then have to see if a guy is a genuine and sincere person and has morals is is "a gentlemen" first and for-most and lives up to it without and proves he is worthy.....I think chivalry, showing respect and maybe striking a friendship not relationship is the key....you already are doing mate I so your friends list proves that and your way ahead of most...awesome stuff :) good luk post corona dude ...:))Rob
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gazpacho
5 years ago
The best you can hope for is being an above average arsehole. Women standards are on a whole different plain. Think gay guy... easy to get as a backer of chips... then think lady.... some kind of hideously expensive rarity upon which there is a six month waiting list, deposit paid
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