RHP

RHP User

M47

Length of profile and first contact

May 25 2014

I recently received a response to a message that made me think that my profile was putting some women off as it could be construed as being too long and so they aren't even reading it. I have also noticed a couple of recent forum posts about the length of messages too. My question to you all is - Do you skip overly long profiles or messages and if so, what classifies as too long?

Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Is not the length of your profile, it's the fact that you are married...emotionally unavailable.... Perhaps a woman in a similar situation as you,might be more interested xxQ

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    The longer the better! (Rockercouple80, still adore yours!)

  • Circe

    Circe

    11 years ago

    Yours is fine... I think the married bit might be the kicker... Oh well, good on You for being honest. Also your location, I can't imagine that there'd be too many Rhp-ers in Sunbury.

  • MsSuperFoxy

    MsSuperFoxy

    11 years ago

    Totally agree with others...It's not the length of your profile it's the fact you are married and in an open relationship. There's no mention of your partner as in....is she on this site?? If so why isn't there no mention of her profile and if you are both on here, do you have a couple profile? Maybe as well redirect readers to the couple profile as well on your profile?? Is she's not on here or has no idea you are on here...you are in a pickle then aren't you?? Most women want a man who is emotionally available and can invest in some sort emotional attraction not just physical. I give you credit tho...saying you are married - not many do. Good Luck and all the best. Ms.Foxy

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    I don't like long profiles but yours isn't too bad, I agree with the others it is probably the married thing.

  • Missb4u

    Missb4u

    11 years ago

    Yep I agree. I detest long profiles and I do skim them but I didn't find yours to be to long. I actually think it's very well written and I enjoyed it. For me it's about the relationship status. But I do applaud you for being upfront about it. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • Paradisepair

    Paradisepair

    11 years ago

    If it puts anyone off they're not the people we want to meet up with...

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    As with everything, there are different opinions about this... Even in this thread, it's a mixed bag. Some saying the profile length doesn't matter and some saying to them it does...! My opinion is, if it's INTERESTING and not just a load of unnecessary drivel (or worse, talking ones self up), most people would take the time if they were interested in what they saw and then read in the initial sentences of the profile. Once you have someone's interest, you have them, and they will read. I mean, after all... Many people read whole books... LOL Can I ask what it was in the message that made you 'feel' as though it was too long? From the way you put it, it seems they didn't just 'come out and say it'... I recently touched on this very issue a couple of weeks ago and was very kindle helped by a nice lady on here that made a couple of 'obviously' good suggestions, as I'm getting more ladies saying 'Hello' . Mine was quite long and I trimmed the bits that she said were 'unnecessary at the 'Profile Stage' of proceedings. It is still a bit longer than most and all the things I say are, IMO, need to be known at the 'reading of profile' stage. At least that's what I've figured by the change in numbers of ladies contacting me since I 'trimmed' it.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    for all the feedback. My original intent wasn't really to get my profile analysed so much, it was just meant as a general query to assist others too. I wasn't 'complaining' about my lack of responses either, as I understand that married (and honest) men aren't that popular here and I have actually had some success, I was just a bit surprised when one lady responded to me and said that when she opened up my profile after receiving my message, she almost skipped it as it 'looked like a novel'. It was only because I had read her profile and written a personal message to her that she read mine (and admitted that it was a great read). I prefer longer profiles as it gives you more to go on when writing a message and it's easier to personalise it instead of sending a general, template style message. As for a first contact with someone, if you have a short profile and receive a long message (more than a couple of paragraphs), would you read it or skip it?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Yes some people definitely like to bang on about themselves (cuse the pun) and there plenty of lame cut n pastes... Meander you're the money ! - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    When reading a profile I look more at what it doesn't say. Then again I tend to over analyse everything .........

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Welcome to the forums!

  • Mischeviouslad

    Mischeviouslad

    11 years ago

    If a long profile is offputting....... Im rooted

  • On_Safari

    On_Safari

    11 years ago

    You can't amuse me.

  • MsSuperFoxy

    MsSuperFoxy

    11 years ago

    I read your profile.. May I suggest seeing you did ask and put it out there. To put your last sentence in "About Me" first as a woman who reads that will read that line first cause, it is how you would treat a woman. I really liked that sentence. I would also put as profile pic one of you smiling - if you want to show your face that is. It gives the reader more of a choice to go with your profile and they can see what they are getting. Seeing a grey ghost does tend to make people skip profiles...I know I do - sometimes. Other than that....to me it's not a bad written profile. Maybe even write a forum up seeking feedback under Hot Topics called "Profile Clinic, Tips & Advice" :) Best of Luck and hope you find what you are looking for. :) OOPS Sorry OP....this is your forum and feedback about yours....after all. Please forgive me. Ms.Foxy

  • rc_80

    rc_80

    11 years ago

    We had to remove stuff from our profile because RHP wouldnt let it save... was too long. Certainly dont have an issue getting replies though.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Quoting 'SuperFoxxxy' OOPS Sorry OP....this is your forum and feedback about yours....after all. Please forgive me. Ms.Foxy No worries, as I said earlier, I didn't intend this to be just about me, but as a general guide for everybody.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Than a two sentence one or one that has the standard answers in it.... like let my photo be the judge or I'll get back to my profile later.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Hello once I had good advice once in a previous life. and it was read the first sentence and then the last paragraph and the you will get 90% of the message. having said that please do not look at my profile i would hate to see what was the general interpretation.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Just happened upon this post. Your profile isn't too long in my opinion. Infact, I keep mine deliberately long. Weeds out people with short attention spans and attracts the intellectually curious now and then.. No, I definitely think it's your marital status. I mean, there can't be too many people in open relationships on this site. Or women sexually or emotionally evolved enough to accept you're "emotionally unavailable" because you have a primary relationship. Your location is merely the final nail in the coffin. RHPers in NW Melbourne?? They're like rockinghorse shit! Unicorns even! You're doomed. We all are. *eyeroll* Flirty x

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    This one I just saw has me baffled: About MeHey there. I can't guarantee you that we already have a lot in common - but if you read on and find out we do - you should message me! I want someone who will be upfront, honest, and I will do the same.I am Looking ForI'm looking for no-strings attached fun with people who seek the same.

  • OPNmarriagecpl

    OPNmarriagecpl

    10 years ago

    Length is fine. We prefer a lengthy and descriptive profile to ascertain whether or not they're a fit for us. Ours is also lengthy but you can Definetely tell that some people don't bother to read it. Our response is usually; Thanks but no thanks. The fact that you are married is very off putting and we would have discontinued reading at that point as would many people. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I have been wondering about my profile lately as well. Judging from the responses I'm getting(or lack of) from people out there I'm starting to think that I am doing something wrong. My profile is perhaps poorly written/not attractive or I myself am not that attractive to the opposite sex. Or, perhaps I am just contacting the wrong sorts of people, the time wasters and fence sitters. While we are on the topic, I would love some constructive criticism on my profile Thanks in advance :)

  • OPNmarriagecpl

    OPNmarriagecpl

    10 years ago

    Your profile is quite short and doesn't say much about you at all nor about what your looking for in a woman? Get creative. Sell yourself. Make your profile stand out from the multitude of single Adonis-esq wordsmiths available. Good luck. - Posted from rhpmobile