F51

Loneliness

May 13 2014

I am just wondering how many single guys out there will admit to getting lonely and are looking for a bit of good company from the opposite sex. I read so many profiles out there looking for 'no strings attached', 'don't want the headfuck', 'not looking for anything serious', etc. But what you say and what you do are very different. There are so many guys online and in my job that are just good to chat with and I can tell they enjoy the interaction. I may not have met them, some I will have, some I never will and others in the real world are just people who pop into the shop for a chat when they see my car. I even have old fuck buddies just contact me out of the blue for a chat. I can tell these guys are lonely, they just want to have a normal easy going chat with someone who is not one of the boys but I feel after I start getting too personal they drop off the radar. I get on the verge of getting to know someone and then they just wont let me in. It is like a fear of dropping their guard and being vulnerable to feelings again. So my question is, do you do this? and why not go with it?

Comments

RHP User

11 years ago

Sounds to me that you Ralf may want to take the chats or friendship to another level when a man may not . I knew a girl who was an aquaintance that then turned into a friend that then turned into a house mate . Now the entire time i never wanted anything more than that just house mates and friends . But this girl wanted more , i resisted time after time when seriously i would arrive home and she would say when will you fuck me ? Why dont you fuck me ? Are you going to fuck me tonight ? Come on !! Please fuck me why not fuck me ?? Everyday seriously . My answer my feelings i dont want to fuck you i live with you i am not fucking you because im not . Well persistance pays off four months of absolute nagging and i mean until it was easier for me to just fuck her . And i did . A empty fuck with no emotions for her or with her or from me. And it did not turn out well . And never again . - Posted from rhpmobile

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

It is guys that keep a dialogue with me and I love a good chat and I am not afraid to admit that I am lonely. Some I may have a sexual interest in, others definitely not but I know they are nice guys and great to chat with. It usually starts out with contact of a sexual nature then it settles more into chit chat and just continues from there but only to a point. Kept an arms length away, close but not too close.

reply

like
Dryphuz

11 years ago

a guy will feel himself getting too close when he doesn't want to and will bail out before he gets entangled in something he's not really up for. A man can make a conscious decision to stay single for whatever reason. Its possible that you're a great conversationalist, but they are sticking to their convictions despite how well you're getting along. I do get that kind of lonely. I used to have a large circle of friends, but marriage and children amongst the majority has reduced things to basically 3 or 4. One of those has all the communicative intellect of a goldfish, and another is happy going to work, coming home, drinking until he falls asleep in front of the TV. Of the other 2 only one ever wants to talk about anything deep. And he's got a girlfriend and i see him less than once a fortnight, so yeah... I know whats its like to be lonely and just feel like some human contact.

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

I think that chatting either by online or even in person is a lost art and too many people these days want to say hi how about a fuck such mental stimulation is just mind boggling I love chatting and it is said that I was vaccinated with a gramaphone . Although I am now a guess member I was a full member here for almost two years but had to stop this due to needing that money elsewhere but if anyone be they a Lady/Couple/TvTs want to message me I am only too happy to answer and obviously if I answer you I would expect to be answered as you can see I have a real problem with small messages but at least you know that I talk I chat I am real and pick a subject and I will hold my own. So ralf74 let's talk. Regards Neil

reply

like
Twisted_Mister

11 years ago

Sometimes I get lonely and long for waking up in the morning, feeling a woman's naked body against mine. The intimacy and mental connection particularly. And sometimes I relish the ability to sit on the couch watching Sopranos reruns in my jocks, scratching my nuts and drinking milk from the box. Not having to explain why i got home at 4 am full of bourbon, smelling of perfume and with an empty wallet. Wouldn't be dead for quids. Depends on the day, I think. Sometimes you get both in one day! - Posted from rhpmobile

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

But you are assuming that guys are too scared to let go or to get to know you hence their disappearing. What is probably happening is that they are getting their needs met by having a bit of a chat. They don't need more than that .... It seems like it is you who is wanting more intimacy. Not them. :)

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

Quoting 'Meeka100' But you are assuming that guys are too scared to let go or to get to know you hence their disappearing. What is probably happening is that they are getting their needs met by having a bit of a chat. They don't need more than that .... It seems like it is you who is wanting more intimacy. Not them. :) from these guys, I am addressing loneliness not intimacy but revealing intimate details often comes along with getting to know someone. I am referring to communication, nothing more, nothing less.

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

You start chatting. It's all going well and you start to reveal more personal details and then, suddenly, nothing! Lol - Posted from rhpmobile

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

This topic is an interesting one, as i have done the lock jaw myself. I think that yes we really would like to go further but we males do have a paint brush attitude. Self defence i suppose. I have too many times been treated like a walking atm. Now i slpit my money three ways into my account and my son and daughters. Trust and time will be the only answer hopefully the woman of my ideals will dump into me. But why do we need to feel wanted. Insecurity in our own direction of our lives or the fear of old age.

reply

like
MsSuperFoxy

11 years ago

I call them Sadly, It's true...I have to admit, there's plenty out there in real life and cyber space - male and female. Foxy

reply

like
MsSuperFoxy

11 years ago

*shit! I'm onto it before the spelling nazi's get to it!!* LOL! Should read... Mr and Mrs Emotionally Unavailable Foxy

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

when you come from a 20 year relationship you think wow I can go out with my mates more often, but pretty soon you realise that its not their company you seek. It's the female companionship you seek there is something soothing about talking to a woman don't know why but I find it soothing.

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

The past few years as work has gone through various intense patches I've found myself at times cut off from my regular social network, and certainly not available for 'vanilla' dating. I've had the occasional lover who I've just enjoyed spending time with chatting and feeling like a human; other friends I've made who I've really gotten to know through writing to each other online, rather than spending physical time together. Sometimes I actually find I reveal more to people I write to than to those I regularly see in person. Some of my closest, most intimate friendships I've had were as a high school teenager chatting to a select group of people nightly around the country on MSN. We were brought together via mutual interests on an internet forum. It can be quite nice having separate worlds to 'debrief' to, where, because they don't know each other and aren't wrapped up in the realities of your day-to-day relationships, you can discuss other aspects of your life in a more honest, abstract sense. I imagine that's the appeal of these forums for a lot of us!

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

Quoting 'nigel435' This topic is an interesting one, as i have done the lock jaw myself. I think that yes we really would like to go further but we males do have a paint brush attitude. Self defence i suppose. I have too many times been treated like a walking atm. Now i slpit my money three ways into my account and my son and daughters. Trust and time will be the only answer hopefully the woman of my ideals will dump into me. But why do we need to feel wanted. Insecurity in our own direction of our lives or the fear of old age. I figured it was a self defense thing and I get why people do it, would just be nice to know rather than the withdrawal that feels like I have somehow offended someone. Thanks for your response and good luck being able to find that trust with someone.

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

Quoting 'perthmasterdv8' I think that chatting either by online or even in person is a lost art and too many people these days want to say hi how about a fuck such mental stimulation is just mind boggling I love chatting and it is said that I was vaccinated with a gramaphone . Although I am now a guess member I was a full member here for almost two years but had to stop this due to needing that money elsewhere but if anyone be they a Lady/Couple/TvTs want to message me I am only too happy to answer and obviously if I answer you I would expect to be answered as you can see I have a real problem with small messages but at least you know that I talk I chat I am real and pick a subject and I will hold my own. So ralf74 let's talk. Regards Neil you are right that good communication is a lost art. Seducing the mind is so sexy, if only some people knew the power they hold but have no idea how to use it.

reply

like
RHP User

11 years ago

Ralf74 and Tulips4u - I agree with what you've said as this has happened over and over.Guys initiate everything, the contact, the messaging.......and chat with you......some even reveal way more than they need to.......but as always I'm a good listener and I enjoy the banter.In most cases I wouldn't mind maintaining the acquaintanceship or friendship.However in many cases, the "brick wall" goes up and they disappear, never to be heard of again.People and mateship seem to be so dispensable to many people.Sometimes I don't understand people.And yes I think the art of conversation and communication is already lost as many are too busy hiding behind computers and phones and not getting out living life and meeting new people face to face.

reply

like

Loneliness

Comments

Tags

Boards

Forum help