Meetings

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  I have experienced exactly what you have described and all that self doubt has cursed through me as well "What's wrong with me", "What did I/ didn't say " Äm I not pretty enough"?", every conceivable self doubting thought has flowed through this little brain, but then it dawned on me, penny dropped and it was also blatantly pointed out to me by wiser women And then, after some confrontational messages, confirmed, that they are partnered, and this is their thrill to ease their boredom. Cheating but not in the physical sense Its not you, its not me, its them Disclaimer: At no time am I suggesting this is male specific, I'm sure it is a two way street

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  It’s not just guys that do this but couples as well. Although from my experience when it is a couple it’s mainly the male driving it and ultimately it falls apart because she is not into it. We have given second chances to people who have turned out not to deserve them as their true colours just keep shining through... Sad to say though that it begins to tarnish the fun and put doubts in your head for future conversations and meets. - Posted from rhpmobile

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  Quoting 'pipsqueak' I have experienced exactly what you have described and all that self doubt has cursed through me as well "What's wrong with me", "What did I/ didn't say " Äm I not pretty enough"?", every conceivable self doubting thought has flowed through this little brain, but then it dawned on me, penny dropped and it was also blatantly pointed out to me by wiser women And then, after some confrontational messages, confirmed, that they are partnered, and this is their thrill to ease their boredom. Cheating but not in the physical sense Its not you, its not me, its them Disclaimer: At no time am I suggesting this is male specific, I'm sure it is a two way street ______________________________________________________________________Exactly. And hi Oncewastame,This has happened to everyone on every dating/sex site at one time or another.These people are liars who never intend to meet anyone in the first place.Their egos are so fragile that they couldn't cope with meeting face to face anyway and all they wish to know is that there is someone out there who is willing to meet them. That then makes them feel good about themselves for a short while until they start the game all over again with someone else.That's all it is. Game playing.Don't take it personally because they don't know you personally therefore it's absolutely no reflection on you or anything you did or did not do.

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  Mischeviouslad

  7 years ago

  It is all too easy in here for people to NOT be what they claim. They will lie about themselves to seek to convince others they are more than they are. And when they can get away with that, they will hold a very low level of respect for others and treat them as disposable options. Filtering through the muck is an important step in making a connection - Posted from rhpmobile

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  DynamicCouple36

  7 years ago

  Either they were not whom they said they were, or for them it was all fun and games, the thrill of the chase , all just a fantasy with no intention of actually following through with a real face to face meeting. Most are not as single as they professed to be. Such are the pitfalls of this cyber dating world. It’s easy to walk away and or ghost someone. Far to many fakes and wannabes on here. Best to rather meet real people at a party or a club. - Posted from rhpmobile

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  LuxurySlut

  7 years ago

  I had single females and couples bail on me. Either on first date or even follow ups which is very odd after knowing each other and messaging/playing for sometime. I’ve heard from lovers that males do that too. Probably an anxiety thing, lack of communication or the spark is gone. It sucks, but what can you do other than move on and hang out with people that commit to plans. - Posted from rhpmobile

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  noeleena

  7 years ago

  Hi. I quess for myself I,d expect it and have been let down or turned down and got an email a month later I was too busy to meet you. in this case I covered myself as I had other things to do , so if I say I,ll meet some one at a time both agree to then I,ll be there, unless there is a very good reason I cant be there then I let the other person know a week or more before . The let down,s I have had were because of and even though we had emailed each other for a while - over a month , was because of they hearing me on the phone , I had told them I am a female and because of my intersexed detail my voice is not the same as many females so I was told I,m a lier I,m a male and was a dresser or trans , plus from a few who have met me don't belive I am a female . yet they know about my background , strange , as I have been seen by 3 Million people in NZ per TVNZ and had interviews for papers as well, so its not as though I,m not known., So you could say for some my voice is not what ...they … expect, even though they were told, So I think it comes down to they are playing games and on top of that they demanded I show nude photos to them,, I wont be doing that, and did not you can quess what they wont, so I have had to learn quite a lot , just not what I expected I,d have to do. And tomorrow ?.... I,m meant to be meeting some one so we will see, how that goes, I,ll be there at the time appointed, lunch time. ...noeleena...

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  noeleena

  7 years ago

  Hi, Just in answer to my thinking yesterday, was meant to be meeting some one …. did not happen he never showed up I was waiting for 3/4.s of an hour where I said I,d wait so I had my lunch and he never came. or more like the first time I said I,d meet him and that time, oh he said I was to busy ...doing nothing and could not be bothered,, so there you have it ...end of … ...noeleena...

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  massageking17

  7 years ago

  I think this happens to everyone, treat it as what most people already expect, that some people will not show when they say and some will cut conversations short when everything seems to be going so well. Every once in a while though you will connect with a genuine person, go on to meet and that is when you put maximum effort in to make sure you both or all enjoy the experience weather that is one off or ongoing. I have had many conversations with people on here and have so far managed to meet and enjoy spending time with 2 wonderful ladies and 1 couple.

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  Bazingal

  7 years ago

  I don't view a change to a meet as reflection on me. There is life outside RHP. People have other commitments outside this site and sometimes unexpected things crop up. But being a no show with no message is not cool. I always plan meets in a public place, cafe/pub, as safety is paramount. I won't give my address to someone I haven't met. If they don't want to meet up in public, I am not interested.

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  RHP User

  7 years ago

  I struggle with meets due to family commitments (no I'm not married) but I always communicate prior to meets and have the common courtesy to let them know if I can't make it, not that I always get the same in return. - Posted from rhpmobile

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  patricf69

  6 years ago

  I have never stood anyone up, it is rude. But we have to look at the site we are in, it is what one could consider a 'deviant' website so expectations need to be set low (not fair for a few people in here I'm sure). This is a website where one comes to explore their fantasies. Ideally we'd love to meet a hot partner to be who is ready to go when we are (yes, I am moving away from the 'dating' aspect of this site to the 'mating' aspect). We are looking for a connection to open our eyes show us another side to life that we have not explored as yet. I suspect that a fair few people would get cold feet upon the realisation that they were going to meet up with someone they had been 'courting' for awhile. It was all about to get real. It is a real shame as the in person experience would add more meaning to the relationship that had been struck up (maybe it would have been a fizzler but hey something to talk about (or not) down the line). So, after all my babbling, you can't blame yourself. You have not met them so they can't be judging you. When planning a date with someone in here, make it somewhere you wouldn't mind being by yourself anyway. If they don't show, they don't show, it is nothing personal, it just shows you that they are lacking respect and decency for others and are not worthy of any further thought. Very important in here to find out whom you are dealing with, at the least you'd want to see them on a webcam or something. So many people who aren't who/what they say they are (sad but true). Anyway, interesting question and something that occurs in real life too (although, on a less frequent basis i'd imagine). Good luck on your next date.

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  RHP User

  6 years ago

  Hi oncewastame I must say that if we have got to the stage where we have arranged things by text then if I needed to change the plan I would hope that it would be by speaking to you rather than text. Things do happen at short notice but these extreme events seem to happen to people on sites more often than others. I have had a few ladies pull the plug at the last minute Which is very annoying as you are either already there or very close abd have made an effort to clear the time and get yourself prepared. All I can say is that whilst these things do happen I prefer people to be straight with me and just say you are not for me but at least give me the opportunity to meet you if we have hit it off online to the extent that you are thinking of meeting. I would say that you are more likely for it not to happen to you if you are brave enough to speak on the phone as part of the build up to the meeting. You will get a better sense of the other person that way. Hope you have more success but keep smiling as it is their loss.

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  MrOakenbear

  6 years ago

  I'm honestly surprised that this is something females experience too, as over my time here I've become quite the proficient ghostee I really think it has a lot to with the nature of online behaviour. If someone said hi to you out in public that you weren't interested in, would you just ignore them? Probably not. Someone contacts you through rhp that you aren't keen on.... Deadly silence. Sometimes they will respond with varying levels of interest, for varying amounts of time, but eventually they disappear without so much as a goodbye. Unfortunately I think this is something that has become acceptable. All I can say is don't give up hope. Keep trying. There are genuine people who do want to meet up out there.

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  RHP User

  6 years ago

  Sorry to hear about the problems you have had I am a single male and please don't think all men are like that I just want to say this is a problem shared by females and males I have been into the Swinging side of things too many years now and I will admit I have come across a lot of women is stained you up all the time that is why now I mainly play with couples as I find it is only about one in 10 couples that actually stand you up compared to single women my experience as a male is that you get stood up 90% of the time with single women on average I find it's between 25 to 30 women stand you up before you find 1 women how actually shows up its really bad for us all The worst part is most of the time when a women gives you her address you find out she has giving you a fake address and you rock up at a stranger's house who has no idea you are coming around and it makes for a very uncomfortable and awkward situation so why do women keep doing that to men I have no idea as I am not the only one that this is happened to that I know of So anyway I know it causes doubts and you start thinking that things are wrong with yourself but all I can say is not every man is like this as I know not every woman is like this too if I was down in Sydney I would take you out for a great night and hopefully lots of fun involved to show you that not every man is a complete arsehole but believe you me I know plenty of those assholes lol

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  justforthefun44

  6 years ago

  This has happened to use a few times. Message tex arrange a meeting. Then it's a no show without any reason. It has happened to use from males, females, and couples. There is a lot of fake profiles on here I believe that the ounces that don't answer or at least reply no thanks are fake. Or there is some rude people around. Saying all that we have meet a. Opulent of nice females and males were we had on going fun.

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