F59
Mental health issues on play dates or amongst your FWB
March 23 2014
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
I would rather someone talk to me about their issues than struggle alone. Even if they are a play date...they are reaching out and that's the first step. So to everyone out there struggling I hope u r ok, and that today you have a human connection that gives you hope and solace. - Posted from rhpmobile
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
learnt about being a "rescuer" in relationships as I was caught up in a drama Triangle. I believe it has to do with my background and the field of work I am in. I have learnt I can not rescue, as it was enabling the other persons behavior. I haven't really come across anyone with mental Health issues however I would think in today's society it is quite common. I have been with an addict and when it ended I seeked the help/tools and knowledge to know it was not me. OHHHHHHHHHH I can totally understand where you are coming from beachlover. Foxy
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RHP User
11 years ago
It was along the lines of we're all damaged goods here, to one degree or another. I think it was in the context of emotional baggage rather than mental health issues.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I had a guy have an anxiety attack once things got started. I ushered him outside and spilled that he had Mental Health issues and lot's of issues in general and was off his meds. We talked and I suggested he go back on his meds and suggested steps towards recovery. He left, but kept texting, my empathy and knowledge had given him the impression that I was going to help him, whilst I am always happy to counsel positive lifestyle choices, I am not here to be someones personal mental health worker. It got a bit stalkerish in the end, definately not what I am looking for from here. 1:4 people will be affected by a Mental Health problem, pretty high odds that you will come across it. Anxiety and depression are very common and not always easy to identify without knowing the person, take your time communicating a bit before meeting, if you see desperation and negativity in the persons communication, pass them on.
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sweetgem
11 years ago
Although I have several scars on my arms, I do not have the same experience as yours, Beachlover. So I have nothing valuable to contribute on this topic. However, I have successfully helped a couple of people on my life path to fight mental illness. Mental health is one of the largest issues in our society, and many people are in need of help, whether it be a chance to talk or cry to get the pressure off their chests, or a guidance to seek further professional assistance. Hence, I have decided to move into that area and hopefully my knowledge and awareness of such problems could contribute to the prevention of further life lost! PS. Please pardon me for using the heavy terms above, but it was what these people went through at the time. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
I think Im quite good at screening out people with any mental health issues...... i dont blame them obviously, ... I just prefer to not invite drama into my life. DG
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Lovinit28andKC72
11 years ago
I'm doing an accredited mental health first aid course run over 3 days, in the hope that it can help me recognize, assist and maybe help people who struggle with mental health issues....it's close to my heart and if it can help one person than it would have been well worth it..... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' I think Im quite good at screening out people with any mental health issues...... i dont blame them obviously, ... I just prefer to not invite drama into my life. DG having mental health issues, does not always mean DRAMAI would bet every person on this site, has had some form of mental health issues at some stage in their life, including you DG. I think for women that's what brings us here, damaged goods in more way than one. I prefer to think of it as the cracked cup, and that's a beautiful thing sometimes. Yes I have had lovers with problems, usually relationship issues, and yes I listen to them, inside and out side of bed. I stay friends with them, unless their mental health issues lead to an obsession with me and that's has happened a few times, but that's with people I have not met. As I have worked with this kind of stuff for years and can work out risk management. But we cant always do that and one day we may just end up in a bedroom with a nut job and not told anyone where we were. the one guy who I thought was sane turned out to be a really nasty fucker. You would never know if you saw him or spoke to him, a real charmer. the nature of internet sex sites I have nice soft boobs and if a guy wants to put his head there after he has blown his load and then unload his troubles, then that's ok with me. and yes impotence can be a problem and I get that the single girls may want a little action and not to be the sounding board. I am that kind of woman, the comfort fuck LadyT
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RHP User
11 years ago
... by only having sex by myself ... but then again, I'd still be there.
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RHP User
11 years ago
it all depends on the situation and your relationship..... A lover I was seeing for over three years....not often,about every six weeks.......confided in me and told me things so incredibly personal that I became a surrogate counsellor of sorts......he is a lovely man but had no friends outside of his family.....men are often so isolated and sometimes confiding in a stranger is not just therapeutic but easier than telling your nearest and dearest......on the other hand,it is sometimes overwhelming when you are confronted with a strangers pain.......sometimes the only thing to do is to just listen.......anxiety is probably the most common and growing health issue.... almost an epidemic....xx Q
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RHP User
11 years ago
How beautiful is crackle glaze,and the raku fired pot...beauty tempered by the fire...people are tempered by their life experiences.which can seem to break us,but can also be what eventually makes us,cracks and all xx Q
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RHP User
11 years ago
Well I agree its not always a drama, there are so many of us that have or are suffering from mental health issues of some sort. A lot due to having to support others with there ill health. I am not afraid to say that I have been one of those. My oldest son had adhd and a anxiety disorder and recently helped nurse my father through asbestos lung cancer and finally his death in Oct 2013. Of course there are others that need more help and its not best to get involved. Until such time as they have recovered. So this is not a huge issue for me, just makes a person worth knowing. Because they have enriched lives from having to deal with a difficult life. They also appreciate relationships, friendships and family so much more.
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RHP User
11 years ago
like to know more of the connection of being a "rescuer" to "enabler" please elaborate am interested
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have had a complete breakdown, where I got anxiety and hardly left the house for six months. I lived alone and was turning into a hermit. But my bloody dog kept taking me for walks and soon I got to meet people in the park and had to talk to them or they would think me a rude cow. I have been diagnosed with Post Traumatic stress disorder, any one that knows about the current situation with the Royal commission into child abuse in institutions, well that's where I got mine, along with a few other nasty events in my girlie life. a doctor once thought I had depression( he was wrong) I was just a bit blue at the time, as we all can getanyway he gave me anti depressants and I ended up in emergency with serotonin syndrome, google it so we may all look like we have our shit together but some days we can unravel like a old jumper. I am a bit like jensman, when I have a wank I am fucking a lunatic
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RHP User
11 years ago
Performance anxiety, social anxiety... for someone with good going anxiety, getting laid is a huge step for them, if you've managed to be a part of that (...erm, you're banging them ...), sooner or later it's not surprising that they'll 'fess up as to how much you're helping them.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Exhibit A - Me. PTSD- Yep Anxiety - Oh yeah... Depression - Tick. Long have I known the Black Dog. Medicated - Yes thank fuck, I'd be gone without it. So this is probably the key reason I hangout on RHP. My baggage is such that anyone I connect with in a relationship is likely to the head for the hills when they get the full picture. I don't blame them, and I don't hide it if they ask, but ultimately that's actually not what I'm after. I honestly prefer they don't ask to be frank. I pay a professional handsomely to help me through all this. I wont take it to bed with someone. It's not why I'm there. I have no doubt the experiences detailed above are repeated thousands of times over. Whether you invite that or accept it is your choice. Like anything, if it makes you feel good, go for it. But be aware it can come at a cost. If you get a buzz out of helping someone deal with their stuff, and you can handle that and stay healthy yourself, that's a good thing. Just be careful to keep the boundaries in place, and don't own it that much it has an adverse affect on you too. Cheers.
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RHP User
11 years ago
An earlier post would be an accurate statement that most people on here are suffering a mental health issue. As most people associate sex with pleasure and pleasure with good feelings, the search for a place to feel good is a search for a safe haven. Also ms_silk says a lot of people suffer mental health issues from caring for someone with MH issues. I think the issues have always been there, its now you have the experience of recognising the symptoms and struggles of the other person you can see it in yourself more easily. My exwife is bi- polar and had intimacy issues and after being in that relationship and being there for her I can recognise my minor struggles of depression are more than a bad day. I think women on here will experience the MH issue more with play dates because even though it is a play date/ casual sex, most women still need a connection to their partner/s even if it is for a few hrs, and men think that once they have shared something this personal and not been hurt from it that this can be a safe haven therefore will seek that out again. Shit I got deep there. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
it normal and really we are all making to much fuzz about mental health?I see it in this way tooo. because everything has to be so perfect in our world we cant admit anymore it is quite normal to feel "blue" as Lady T said, we need to pop a pill.Instead of talking to others, get a hug, curl up and cry we pop a pill.After my husbands death.....yes traumatic in front of me like you cut a tree down.....i had two breakdowns I was frightened with two children alone and not a proper job.And yes the DOC said take this pills...and I think I would... when not my rational mind would have taken over and my deal was ,NO first I take counselling and then when I not get better I take the pills.Isn't it normal to break down and feel angst....isn't it normal to go through all this. We don't have the big family structure any more to support us we are all alone.....and that's maybe why we breaking down. Everybody is out for the " ME" everybody is frightened of the other, no trust any more, and quite frankly no love any more. We all have become lone islands....no wonder we feel angst. We are like wolfs, we need the herd but we think or get told we don't need the herd any more.I am frightened sometimes, shit scared of tomorrow, sad sometime and I cry, lonely sometimes, ugly sometimes, quite nasty sometimes.....still that's all "NORMAL" to feel this way.So my question? Is mental health really getting a bigger problem, or is it just that we like to pop more pills?
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RHP User
11 years ago
In DG's defense it isn't always easy being with someone you love with mental health issues, so I suppose when looking for casual friendships you do prefer something uncomplicated.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Maybe we are just recognizing different illness that doctors didn't acknowledge before, such as the range of aspergers. Although I do agree that we seem to be pill popping happy. How come every second person has an ADD child these days?
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
This obsession over me is becoming unhealthy ;-)...... My comment put more simply so that you can follow it is..... if you could choose to be involved with someone with an existing mental condition, versus someone without.... I know who I'll choose. And I'm CERTAIN there are people with behavioural compulsions you try to avoid. DG - Posted from rhpmobile
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Beachlover1999
11 years ago
I can feel the love, empathy for others and care we have, it's great to see we do stop listen and support and ask 'Are you OK?'. One of the FWB was very grateful and although frustrating at the time and now he has gathered himself due to our chats has taken a different path, being the listener did help (he told me so).
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Beachlover1999
11 years ago
For slapping DG, geeez lad you need to get your head in on occasion!
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Beachlover1999
11 years ago
If a girl had a crisis on a play date would the guys be so empathic??? (Yep the answers probably is predictable....) Thanks for sharing experiences, has helped me to reflect and realise that we are here for much more than just sex and some have a greater purpose in the care and support of others. Not just here on RHP but the wider community.......
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Beachlover1999
11 years ago
For listening.......xxx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'Maybe we are just recognizing different illness that doctors didn't acknowledge before, such as the range of aspergers. Although I do agree that we seem to be pill popping happy. How come every second person has an ADD child these days? Meeka100 before I start (your smoking hot girl) always wanted to say that. Your right about the Asperger’s so many forms of it and lot of children are missed diagnosed and just labelled ADD\ADHD. My son was diagnosed in pre-primary and it is done basically with a questionnaire. Fortunately my GP gave me a book to read first and I identified my son’s problems. There are some kids who just can have something simpler like a food allergy or even a learning problem. Sad that our children can be giving medication without ruling out so many other possibilities. Regarding pill popping I believe depending on the severity of your depression or anxiety. It can be of great assistance as long as you take on some counselling as well. I know we are getting a little off topic traffic but it’s all relevant really.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I suffer from depression and so far I haven't roped anyone in on my dramas. I have been battling depression for over 8 years now. Once I met a guy, he promised me the world, promised to be different to all others. I told him about my depression and how I'd been managing it for years now. What did he do, he offered me what he thought I wanted so I could sleep with him and milk me if my little finances when I did he did the Houdini on me. That brought back all my issues and it got so bad I wasn't able to cope anymore but I went and got some random person to check me into hospital and I stayed there for a while. Only one friend I met on rhp is aware of this, everyone who sees me would be shocked and surprised to know I have mental health issues It's funny how some of you think mental health issues =dramas for you. Where's the empathy? What if it were you with the mental health issue how would you feel when people talk about 'it' and you as if you had the plague? And have you even considered how you might also contribute to someone else's mental we'll being whether it be negative or positive? I listen to everyone now, I don't screen for 'crazies' because I know that it's not by choice and I know that I might even change someone's life just by being there or change my own at that. - Posted from rhpmobile
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sweetgem
11 years ago
I'm not sure if you can see these flower icons on your screen (as I'm posting via the app on my phone), but here they are for your bravery, courage and willingness to fight the "demon" in you! 💐🌸🌷🌻🌺 hugs and may the strengths of the Universe be with you forever! 🙏 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' This obsession over me is becoming unhealthy ;-)...... My comment put more simply so that you can follow it is..... if you could choose to be involved with someone with an existing mental condition, versus someone without.... I know who I'll choose. And I'm CERTAIN there are people with behavioural compulsions you try to avoid. DG - Posted from rhpmobile Lady T with the horrible sex addiction and compulsive bj giver. can you type a little slower? I am finding it hard to keep up and , my monitor is full of ink marks , cause I have to underline the important words from DG.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Interesting question . Would you be empathic if a guy on a meet had a turn, and you were publicly embarrassed, or god forbid.... your safety was compromised? If you thought that 'may' happen before you meet.... would you meet him? DG - Posted from rhpmobile
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Beachlover1999
11 years ago
There is significant difference in having a FWB (guys I have either met previously or communicated with for weeks) with depression/anxiety and a schizophrenic psychopath! My ex publicly embarrassed (emotionally and financially $150k debt prior to meeting!!!!), socially isolated us, lied, belittled, unfaithful, verbally abused etc etc me, yep sucked in for 10 yrs......that's what abuse is......seems ridiculous now and will NEVER happen again. To answer your Q, I think my original post was suggesting 'a turn' had occurred, more denial of sexual needs on play date than safety but many other people could have made me feel unsafe ie someone who drank to much, took drugs unbeknown to me, invited unwanted persons to the room etc etc. NO I would NOT meet anyone that my radar sent bad vibes, never. This topic is about so much more than black and white assumptions ie If I may use this example, Lady T has a history of MH/PTSD (previous disclosure) but I bet you wouldn't be 'scared' to meet her because of her history because so much more has been provided in conversation.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
:-) I'm not scared to meet anyone. Those who know me will vouch for who I am. But the topic and my comments are not just about social meetings....the context is about getting more involved.... and within RHP, that may well infer sexually involved.... and that's a little more than just a meet, don't you think! Your comment and example confirms..... You now are prepared to agree with me. I'm not the big bad wolf after all lol ;-)..... PS some can try to slap me...... but don't expect me to go easy in them just because they're a girl. I bite. lol
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RHP User
11 years ago
Shazza I understand what you are saying. But I think sometimes people that are involved with people that have mental illnesses are sometimes forgotten or some how their suffering is considered minor. It can be very difficult being with someone who suffers some form of mental illness.... hate that term by the way. You are often put last and your needs are not met. It can take over your whole life and then you spend every minute terrified and worried about somebody else. It may not be a drama..... but it is a heart ache.
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Beachlover1999
11 years ago
That was very much my story as I described previously. Sucks the soul of you when you give for sooooo long and get nothing back (he is emotionally dead, my ex). It has created anxiety issues for me. I also think it would take an amazing person to convince me to do a live in/marriage scenario ever again, date defo. I am happy again and found my strength and tenacity again.... However this digresses from the play date/FWB scenario, which should be fun!! Great that people can trust and talk of course in particular men who typically don't express their fears/feelings like us chicks do!
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Beachlover1999
11 years ago
I bite to...
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RHP User
11 years ago
It has taken me some time to post on this topic as it is rather personal. I was once at a funeral with my daughter and noticed her friends mother had a bizarre tattoo on her foot....I started a conversation and she told me she had no idea where she got it as she was bi-polar and often had bouts where she losts days and didnt know where she had been. I being the most responsible of people and parents was utterly surprised and thought wow what her childrens life was like. I had the most hard working boss at one stage who had a breakdown and ended up rehabilitating for a while and I took care of his business until he was ready to return...the only discussion we ever had on the subject was after one of my sons friends hung himself and I told him (my boss) that he may never be a milionaire and to not fret over this industry when he had such treasures at home after this sadness I had seen that he was to always choose his family. An ex sister in law is so demented....she said her daughter was possessed by the devil....has compulsive grooming ocd i.e. like brushing the childrens teeth for an hour...the list goes on. After being strong for ever when I went through my divorce avos etc people would tell me not to stress...I saw others going through their divorces amicably and they were on the floor in the fetal position with new partners and anti depressants and I had to cope by myself. I told myself not to stress but soon learnt that my body wasnt listening .....stress was out of my hands and I developed reflux and battled on. ATM every day has its battles of being happy or finding happiness....one too many things has put me past my breaking point ...weighing up what I have going for me against whats not in my life doesnt balance. So now I feel I am on the other side of the sane fence......all those messages that come into my facebook page saying depressions is just a strong person who has had enough or something like that..starts to make sense now. I am also empathetic and listen to others woes and I think Beachloover we find people just need some one to pour their hearts out to...someone unbiased someone they may never see again. So DG your only a day away from crazy as I see.
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RHP User
11 years ago
...even if it is to someone you will never see. You deserve a sympathetic ear. you've certainly been hear often enough sharing sympathy, confidences and advice with others.
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Dryphuz
11 years ago
And thats a shame, but what else can you do. I know you said your time is limited, but if you truly enjoy their company perhaps be prepared to simply put the benefits part of the night on hold and try again another time. They may get better or you can hope to catch them on a good day. In my opinion it comes down to whether you're after casual sex or friends with benefits. You say they are FWB and from your posts i think that's exactly what you're doing, but the operative word there is "Friends". I've always considered that the friends part comes first and then the benefits if its convenient. Otherwise it'd be called sex with occasional conversation. Take advantage yourself. After talking about thier problems air some of your own dirty laundry. I've had my balanced tipped by a mentally unstable partner. She was manic bi-polar. I helped her get diagnosed and was with her during the period that her medication was not working yet, to when it started to. I found i had to tread so lightly not to set her off it stressed me out badly and i ended up coming across as cold and emotionless. Eventually she left me for one of my friends. It was hard on me, but in the end I'd do it all again, because given the choice of helping someone i care for through their pain or not, I don't even consider that a choice. But I'm like that. having said all that, its not like you're on RHP to be a shoulder to cry on. Sadly i think that means mischeviouslad is right and all you can do is screen more harshly if its ruining your experience. Best of luck.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I get both sides of the topic, like meeka said those living with the night mare of mental health feel trapped. men or women who live with those with depression, and there is often no sex for years. they end up on here and feeling as guilty as hell about it. They cant just leave that person, as some have said to me , what kind of an arse hole would I be to leave a sick wife/husband and kids? So they seek a kind of solace here. Both my grandparents and an two aunts killed themselves. And as beach lover said I have been to hell and back and into the land of crazy a few times. I think that's what makes me a whole and empathetic person. Life is like that, dark and light up and down, that's the natural way with the stress of our world. going crazy is how we stay sane. And DG , you can be in a relationship and having sex with a person with mental health issues and never know it. again you can be a day away from a breakdown yourself. I admire your posts, and other times I see you miss the dart board in some important issues. but sometimes you have a "Shun them mentality" as if there is some yard stick that people must measure themselves against your wisdom. I would think being in a relationship with you would be like, sleeping with the enemy, your way or the highway.Lets us all know when you find your Miss Pretty in Pink who comes with her own set of batteries LadyT wearing her long sleeved jacket with the pretty wrap around arms.
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RHP User
11 years ago
You tell me someone who hasn't had an issue at some stage in their lives. FFS it's what makes us human. What happened to 'Are you ok day?' There are so many ppl out there with mental health issues.... depression.bipolar. n plan nutters. I classify myself as a fruity nut. Fark how else would we all cope in this warped world we call home. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Thanks for offering your personal experiences ladies. They add further weight to my earlier comment about preferring to NOT get involved with someone I can see has an issue of mental health. Developing an issue during a relationship is a different situation.. there is already a level if commitment. And should I develop issues as a result of stress or other circumstances..... I would preferably not wish to impose those issues on others to have to deal with as well as whatever else they have going on in their lives... especially complete strangers or new FWB meets. To me, it's very simple..... If I can see an issue on meeting someone, and know that getting to know that person further will invite significant drama into my life..... sometimes.... it's just better to walk away..... even if it means walking away from sex. DG
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RHP User
11 years ago
A lot of crazy isnt always apparent. People dont show it till they have to. Like abusive men their friends would never know. No one I know knows I am unhappy.
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Dryphuz
11 years ago
Quoting 'Leanne6825' I classify myself as a fruity nut. You mean like a cashew?
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RHP User
11 years ago
...one of the accepted recommendations professionals give to people suffering from depression is to force yourself to go out and do fun things even when you don't feel like it. If you pretend to be enjoying yourself for long enough, sooner or later, it will surprise you to find that you're enjoying yourself for real.Live long and prosper.
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RHP User
11 years ago
We are all crazy (for want of a better word) to some degree. Some of us are "lucky" in that our particular craziness falls into the realm of "normal". Others are not so "lucky". Medication can help some and not others. Then there are those for whom medication makes it worse. For the record, our partnership consists of one with long term sleep deprivation (20+ years with virtually no sleep - severe sleep apnoea) and strong reclusive tendancies, and the other with some level of PTSD from sexual abuse as a child. Surprised we are still functional TBH.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I'm partial towards mischievouslad, not all the way, just partial...... In my family circle I have two depressants.... However, whilst I always have an open door to others, I myself 'don't' want to discuss this, not with my play dates, FBs or FWBs, I look at RHP as my sanity hook, where I can let of steam in a physical way, where I can escape the stress and talk about outside interests........ Please don't get me wrong, I will go out of my way to help anyone who shows the need, I will be protective of those in need, however it is not my need...... Some of you know I have my down moments, where I post things about my family and what issues are currently going on..... However, I've been through the shitty childhood, tough marriage bits, problems with the teenagers and I still like to think that I always look on the bright side........ We all have to crack sometimes, it's just how we choose to repair ourselves.
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RHP User
11 years ago
theres a lot of it going around indeed, a recent FWB recently went through some sort of metamorphosis from a sane,intelligent nurse to somebody i cant even relate to anymore..Sometimes you cant help no matter what i should know, my PTSD flares up at times and my only way out is to close the doors pull the shades and listen to a lot of loud music on the headphones...but at least i go to work and can concentrate now after therapy....thats the important part people if you have a problem seek help....
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RHP User
11 years ago
There's plenty on here with mental issues full stop lol
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RHP User
11 years ago
I had a conversation with my housemate.He suffers with depression and has just been through a difficult time involving his ex who he still cares about and supports but her mental health issues and her drinking mean that for him to spend time with her,his problems become significantly exacerbated..... This is what I said to him......you cannot afford to be her friend,you need to be a friend to yourself first......she is not your friend,she does not have the capacity .....for three years I have witnessed their very dysfunctional relationship .....I also said that I could usually tell when he was not in a good space and rather than trying to cope alone he could come and talk to me if he wanted to.....but....I couldn't talk to him for hours,I would just spend a half hour because sometimes I get overwhelmed with other peoples pain too....xx Q
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RHP User
11 years ago
Michevious lad you sound spectacularly insensetive....not allental jealth issues involve drama..most people I have met have had a quiet battle with depression .anxiety..your attitude just doesnt sound nice .. Ok to have boundaries...I have had personal experience of a family member with terrible mental health and it has been a very difficult time ..I had to cut her of completely for my own wellbeing which was hard to do as I naturally wanted to help and see her get well but unfortunately the destructive nature of her illness just became too destructive and it involved family violence. I will always say that I have compassion and understanding but I developed boundaries to protect myself also...shefixated on me and nearly took everything from me and the behaviour detetiorated.. These mental health issues are now spoken about in the media and there is help outthere.... I guess I feel education and taking responsibility are important
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RHP User
11 years ago
There are some people here who really care.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I haven't had a chance to read this thread yet, I will later on, but I'll add my 10c now. I too have noticed a lot of mental issues with my dates and fwb's... Now it's either ME... Or it's the fact that IF they had no issues, they'd probably be "off market". I believe it's essentially making them "harder work" than someone who doesn't have rhese issues... One FWB has severe rheumatoid arthritis and aspbergers syndrome. Her 3 daughters also have aspbergers, and the youngest 16, also has a psychosis that includes self harm... As much as I'm a caring and nurturing type, this is way out of my league... She does a superb job managing herself and her kids, but it's above what I could take on. Her on her own, sure, but the three kids...? She is one example of many. I'll be back tonight to read more... And see if I can add anything else. Hp xo💋 Because you're worth it - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
To quote the OP: "It is also very frustrating, sexually, to have an experience on a play date ie It's supposed to be fun and my free time is limited!!!!" and then asks "What filters you use and am I just on a 'bad run'" I read that to be looking to avoid these situations on a play date in future ... which is OK. It's a personal choice and /or preference is it not? Making that choice does not suggest that that person is without empathy.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Part of the OP's experience of having several men in a row talk about it could be two of the following reasons: 1) It's at plague proportions in our culture. There are many reasons for that and a lot of them aren't necessarily known, or easily identifiable. But conservative estimates suggest that 1 in 4 Australians experience depression and 1 in 5 experience anxiety to an extent that would qualify as a medically-recognised disorder (at some point during their lives). 2) Never before in human history has so much been known about mental illness, nor has it been so 'open' for people (especially males) to admit they are struggling. In times gone by I'm sure some people were just as unhappy as today, it just wasn't spoken about very often in the way the men the OP mentioned have done. I can really recommend the course Lovinit28 mentioned: it's called Mental Health First Aid and it was created by Aussies, for Aussies. :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Thanks for offering your personal experiences ladies. They add further weight to my earlier comment about preferring to NOT get involved with someone I can see has an issue of mental health. Developing an issue during a relationship is a different situation.. there is already a level if commitment. And should I develop issues as a result of stress or other circumstances..... I would preferably not wish to impose those issues on others to have to deal with as well as whatever else they have going on in their lives... especially complete strangers or new FWB meets. To me, it's very simple..... If I can see an issue on meeting someone, and know that getting to know that person further will invite significant drama into my life..... sometimes.... it's just better to walk away..... even if it means walking away from sex. DG made in heavenall you have to do is sleep with one eye open and lock away anything sharp and pointy LadyT and can you play misty for me?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Hi all one bit I'd like to add to this was and still is my own experience I myself became nasty and horrible to the most gorgeous girl I ever met I know I have ruined every chance of even being friends witch devastates me I really wish I could give her a big hug and apologise so much but that'll be something I'll have to live with I actually went overseas working and holiday and became sick on return I'd get all emotional upset about well not allot and I scared and upset her allot in saying witch it's taken over a year to get on the right path with treatment all I can eat is great veggies bit of chicken and fish and that's it I caught a parasite or more it has been a hell of a roller coaster for everyone I know or have known and finally been told by doctor I've been waiting six months to see there's not a test in Australia that will diagnose what's in me it sounds insane I have a recording from the doctor stating this - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
This is all after being put on antidepressants sedatives being told cancer umm nearly being placed into an institution on more than one occasion it's been sickening I still sit in disbelief When what ever happened I would feel intense hurt pain continues or I'd be horrible angry and say things I'd never thought would come out of my mouth and then come back normal and cry continuing sly because of what I had said or done until they have found my liver wasn't keeping up with the level of toxins in my body and it was pretty much dumping it inside me the phsycalogical meds made everything worse cause it was more toxins They have found now that I've been turning pain into an emotion and my body had been shutting down it all sounds full on and is unbelievable belive me I'm stunned but am still sorting out what to do I don't flip out or go silly unless I have any sugar milk or bread products then that's it four five days of hell I will post up what happens next still might be flying overseas for treatment All I ask of people if you know someone that claims it's not in there head there's something wrong try listen to them cause there's a good chance it might not be And please I want absolutely no one to feel upset in any way I know my actions and how I was and do not or will ever be upset with what you had to do for yourself I just really hope one day I could hug you it's shocking and horrible for everyone there's not a day I don't think about it all it's not right and no one should ever have to go through this but as I've found I'm not the first and sadly won't be the last but I can honestly say I won't leave it at this I'll do everything I can to bring it all to light and hopefully it can help others cheers for reading just sometimes things aren't what they seem try remember the person - Posted from rhpmobile
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