F35
Messages from Dominants when you are not submissive
July 29 2013
Comments
-
chevtrek
11 years ago
Firstly a true Dom respects his sub and that helps the sub to be more willing knowing he will stop at her limits. There are many forms of doms and subs anyway to your dilemma these guys cant read as you don't say BDSM hard. Lots of couples try BDSM as to spice there sex life and to do that you don't need a Dom or a Sub just kinky fun. Let them send dumb messages at least when you get the right message you will know he has a brain..
-
RHP User
11 years ago
But you've only mentioned bdsm. Soft.....this to me is handcuffs and feathers....hardly warrants a message for total submission in my view....- Posted from rhpmobile
-
Cheekyarses
11 years ago
Personal choice I'm not into dominating a man. I couldnt tie up a man n whip him or I do not think I could use a strap on on a man - my personal opinion... I could be dominated to an extent by a male or female - but I would not be submitted to any whipping or full on spanking where I am black n blue. I would not make a good sex slave or submissive partner! I do like a good strong man to take control n throw me around so to speak... But this may all change if I really got into role play of being a submissive female or dominate female. Ppl will send messages asking many things n being honest with them is the best thing
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Most likely getting those messages because they see BDSM is listed in your interests.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
People read your profile and take from it from what they will. No harm in removing something like that and only mentioning it to a play partner when they time arises.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
You can still be a submissive if you want BDSM soft. Jesus... It's all about the mind and control and not always about the physical. Think some people miss the whole point. I agree with you OP. there are some real dickheads out there, and they are usually vanilla men in their 40's & 50's I reckon. Some are just abusers in my mind wanting to "increase their stable of bitches".
-
jensta
11 years ago
First of all what is Vanilla Women in your Opinion ? to me Vanilla means in bed kiss touch & Intercourse ... BORING BDSM Soft can be the sub/dom I get many MSG'S that don't match up with my Profile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Great profile, pity most of the guys can't read it.Luckily you've included a simple acronym in capitals that will stand out. That should be all they need to know.Think of it as a filter, should save you hours of background reading.Mr C
-
RHP User
11 years ago
BDSM soft is still sub/Dom....so if you have that listed along with whips and bondage etc...it does suggest an interest in the sub/Dom lifestyle, so either change your profile, or put up with the messages
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I would've assumed that given this woman has BDSM-Soft listed and not medium or hard, that a practicing Dom would get, that's this woman only dabbles in parts of that play, not the lifestyle. That's how I interpret it. So in my view, IF I was a Dom. Why would I bother even messaging if its just a dabble here and there for playtime?? - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I am interested in BDSM. But I'm interested in learning to Domme, and am not interested in being submissive. So that's why I have those interests listed on my profile.@jensta: by vanilla I mean not interested in BDSM. So that still includes people interested non-kinky sex which includes multiple partners at once, oral sex, ect... I guess you could say these things are kinky to some people. But that was what I was trying to get at.@Meeka: I get some messages that come across as creepy, and are clearly from abusers, but what I find more interesting are the men, usually in their 30's or 40's who put in their messages to me that they have a dominant personality type without mentioning any kink. It's almost like its expected that I like dominant men because I'm a woman.I get that we all get messages that don't match our wants. I'm just interested whether anyone else on here has been assumed to be submissive who isn't. This is purely out of interest because I seem to have these types of messages more frequently than other types which don't match my wants.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Come on ladies, read the whole profile. Turn offs include dominant men, but she's interested in exploring dom/sub with women.Try not to focus just on the pretty pictures
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Don't I say I'd like to Domme men as well? Is my profile that cryptic? ;p
-
inspirit
11 years ago
Mainstream right??
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Inspirit, I don't think whipping is main stream. ;-)
-
RHP User
11 years ago
depends what stream you're swimming in....:P lol
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I thought I could switch between D & S roles - I never really considered being a sub or a Dom as a "lifestyle"....more as maybe a role play (?). Then I met 'him'. I wanted to submit in everyway. He made my knees buckle....It was his personality - he is not someone I would have matched myself up with - but when I'm with him, the harder the better, and when he tells me I've pleased him - I'm all smiles for days. Meanwhile - I've played the Dom - maybe I've done ok - been called back for more - but meh! Just role playing eh? Same with being dominated by other men - it's just a one nighter - just playing light hearted games. But. When He calls - I'm there. All his. Black n blue. No idea why - I'm his sub, and he's def my Dom. Get msg a related to our "interests" almost daily - and no, I don't take offence. But I do know now - there's so much difference between a one nighter and (either the man or woman taking control in he bedroom and playing with fluffy handcuffs) role-playing a Dom/sub role - and the real thing. P.S. if you're reading this - my bruises are healing nicely :-P ill send you a pic tomorrow. Hahaha! Have a good Monday night y'all! Mrs B- Posted from rhpmobile
-
Cheekyarses
11 years ago
Maybe I might try be a sub and let myself be completely taken in - just a thought... Mrs C
-
RHP User
11 years ago
For the vanilla girls to respond to this post........ I'll let you know when/if I find them.... Perhaps try aisle 3 at Coles? - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Hey Venus_Surprise My guess would be that you have this line in your profile - " I find sexuality fascinating, both experientially and intellectually, in its many forms, including swinging, poly, BDSM, and even sometimes the plain old vanilla hook up" While you do go on to say you are NOT turned on by "Men who are primarily dominant (nothing personal, it just doesn't turn me on)" my guess the people sending you these messages are reading the prior line and have not read further down to what you have written further along on your profile. Anyhow just my thoughts (and no I was not one of the message senders lol)
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I am a vanilla girl!!! Surlurk, soft or hard has nothing to do with the life style to me. Hard core BDSM to me is the more out there activities, maybe lots more pain, blood play, knife play, hard spanking abd whipping, etc. Where soft can be all the same things but downscaled. So for example, a 24/7 slave who is totally into the life style can still prefer it soft to hard. Same for a Dom as well I assume. That I think, is the most common interpretation I think.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
When I googled it, must of the sites refer to soft and hard limits. So you could view this in a few ways. Just read this..... Soft limit: A limit which is not necessarily set in stone. It may be flexible, may be pushed or may change over time and/or with experience or knowledge of that type of play. Hard limit: What someone absolutely will not do, usually non-negotiable (may or may not be subject to change over time).
-
RHP User
11 years ago
If you are Vanilla......i'm the Pope!
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Perhaps it has something to do with being so god damn sexy and wishful thinking
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'karynb' If you are Vanilla......i'm the Pope! True. Ha! When it comes to BDSM I would say I am vanilla... well, kinda. I think I am starting realise that I prefer the dominant role over all, than to the submissive one. For a long time I just though I wasn't into this kink stuff... but I was looking at it from the wrong angle.I am a work in progress when it comes to this.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
did the empowering strap on give you a clue as to your persuasion?? lol
-
RHP User
11 years ago
..................wouldn't the catholic church have a conniption! But i agree....we are all a work in progress and our likes are often revealed as we get further into exploring who we are. Quoting 'Meeka100' Quoting 'karynb' If you are Vanilla......i'm the Pope! True. Ha! When it comes to BDSM I would say I am vanilla... well, kinda. I think I am starting realise that I prefer the dominant role over all, than to the submissive one. For a long time I just though I wasn't into this kink stuff... but I was looking at it from the wrong angle.I am a work in progress when it comes to this.
-
inspirit
11 years ago
Nawwwww.... It is so much fun though :)
-
inspirit
11 years ago
Maybe some get it mixed up with a few kinks/fetishes. Me ..NOT TELLING :P
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I definitely have a few kinks and fetishes. For sure! I have never really said I was into BDSM myself. But I don't think you have to be in the life style of dominance or submission to really say you are into BDSM right. That should be a question... is it a kink or lifestyle. lolWell I like B&D, not so much on the D&S although is there much separating the two? And I am definitely not S&M. I don't think. I mean what is S&M really? It isn't just about the pain right? Someone did explain it to me but I still get it mixed up in my head. I am confused!!! I always said I don't like submissive guys..... so how come I like to dominate the boys huh??
-
beachgirl11
11 years ago
Great thread , can't believe how many pretenders out there , just want to be tied and spanked in a erotic sort of way then taken , just wish I could find one or a decent club ... u get theses pretenders that are all BS u get all ready and they stand there and say "what do u want me to do" lol ...like derrr u idiot or they turn up with a feather duster and elastic bands from the newsagent WTF .... Hey bomchikawahwah do u lend your man out ? x sounds like u got a keeper there As they say " hit me , hit me , hit me , but don't shit me " lol Stay bound n sexy
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' I definitely have a few kinks and fetishes. For sure! I have never really said I was into BDSM myself. But I don't think you have to be in the life style of dominance or submission to really say you are into BDSM right. That should be a question... is it a kink or lifestyle. lolWell I like B&D, not so much on the D&S although is there much separating the two? And I am definitely not S&M. I don't think. I mean what is S&M really? It isn't just about the pain right? Someone did explain it to me but I still get it mixed up in my head. I am confused!!! I always said I don't like submissive guys..... so how come I like to dominate the boys huh?? Exactly my above point lovely!!! hahaha
-
Mr_Invisible
11 years ago
Some of us have dominant personalitiesAnd we like to assert ourselves in the bedroom and play with toys etcHowever there are many of us that don't expect to turn every girl sub and actually enjoy abit of fire and spark and those that make us work for it abitI'm not a fan of subby girls that are all "yes sir no sir"Not my styleGive me a girl I can experiment with and have fun with as we discover what suits US bestAs long as she doesn't try to tie me up, or try to TOP me... I'm just not into that... lol
-
kinky_master
11 years ago
Hi Venus If someone takes the time to read your profile - one gets the gist that you are not really after dominant ment - but that you are open to the idea - or at least that's what it seemed to me after reading it. One spelling mistake especially made it hard to fully understand. But then I have learned that I am a minority of guys here and read profiles - many others just check points and glance over them - and then believe the more messages they send the more answers they get. So maybe a profile rewrite will help you - but when I had a couples profile with my last wench we still got many messages from guys who never bothered reading the profile. So ignore them and get on with your fun.
Boards
-
Hot Topics
Topics: 14361 Comments: 120840
-
Girls Ask
Topics: 1355 Comments: 14709
-
Guys Ask
Topics: 2425 Comments: 17234
-
Couples' Corner
Topics: 2405 Comments: 12737
-
Swingers Lifestyle
Topics: 794 Comments: 5154
-
Fetish & Fantasy
Topics: 1148 Comments: 6957
-
Hot Travel
Topics: 622 Comments: 2145
-
LGBT
Topics: 156 Comments: 1150
Forum help
-
Something related with that
-
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
-
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
-
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
-
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
Share