Mismatched Couples

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  teamaj2

  3 years ago

  On meeting we definitely had sexual attraction and a desire to get to know each other . Aside from that we had no common ground, we had many points of difference -upbringing , culture , what we sought in a partner , our age , he was a smoker ( no longer ) , I’m much taller than he , location - the list was endless . My Husband was very young and just out of a long term relationship.He sought fun , exploration and no commitments. He was 20 years younger than me , lived two hours away , he sought someone to experience exploration with ( I 100% did not ), he wanted more children etc We were two extremely different people . I had no desire to get remarried or live with anyone . We went with it though and we both do not regret the past 16 years . Our friends and family were astounded . Many friends were lost along the way , in hindsight , no great loss . Life is short . We are glad we went with our instincts . We have it all - love , respect , laughter , a wonderful family unit , fun in our everyday, a wonderful sex life and pre covid - exploration . From our perspective, differences when dealt with in a respectful manner , tolerance and the ability to adapt to each other’s lives can see you not missing out on the best time in your life . Ax

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  oppositesattract

  3 years ago

  Our profile name is because we are opposites. We lived about 2 hours away from each other and there is an age gap. We had very different lives. One of the definite factors for us meeting was we were both real and prepared to engage despite differences. We were not here to waste anyone's time. We did not pretend we were anything other than we were. I messaged her and she responded. We were both real and prepared to flirt and have some fun even if it was no more than that. When we finally met we were holding hands after 30 minutes and never looked back. Our biggest difference is she is extroverted, loud and funny when drunk, knows so many people and can tell you their grandchildren names and what coffee they drink ! I am more reserved and abstract in thought. We both appreciate the other for what they bring to the relationship now 6 years on.

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  Cucknshells

  3 years ago

  When I met my husband we clicked straight away and become good friends. I wasn't sexually attracted to him but loved him as a friend. He had only just turned 20 (much to my surprise) and I was 26 still recovering from having my heart broken and getting used to living in a country town. Getting married and having children wasn't really on my radar. He wanted more but I was reluctant. I didn't want to lose him so we eventually became a couple. That was 28 years ago and still going strong. We have always been on the same page. There was nothing we couldn't talk to each other about. Being with each other is easy. Even though we like different things sexually we meet in the middle. We complimented each other. Very much looking forward to growing old together. Shells xx

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  RHP User

  3 years ago

  You can be mismatched in some ways to compliment others but there is always a pay-off. I never had sexual attraction to my ex husband, but he was so perfect in other ways.

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  countrytouch82

  3 years ago

  Wow thank you above for some wonderful replies. Obviously the long term era that has passed for you, means that it was likely pre-internet dating when you first met and had to figure each other out in person. These days it seems people would have already "screened them out" based on preferences and certainly never met or talked. Which I guess is why there will still always be a market for people wishing to meet strangers in the flesh first.

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  FeistyFatty

  3 years ago

  My husband and I are total opposites and have been since we started going out at 13 years old. Started off as best mates accompanying each other to a school social and now been married 24 years with a bunch of kidlets. He is sporty, cheeky, loud, extroverted, over confident, cocky, arrogant, highly successful. I am slothy, reserved, quiet, sarcastic, introverted, confidently unassuming, opinionated. Don't think many couples are the exact same, it wouldn't work in the long-term.

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  2EssesExploring

  3 years ago

  We met online and bucked the trend of photos first, more like pen pals. We found each other’s minds intriguing and attractive m. We both hate taking photos of ourselves so didn’t really swap many but moved to FaceTime chat. Still over the airways between countries this was pretty poor definition but the attraction grew. We were opposites in so many areas of personality, upbringing, outlook, experiences, sexuality, religious beliefs…the list is long. When I flew in to meet this person I was intrigued with I couldn’t find her, I was looking everywhere but down, eventually I met the eye of this tiny little person and realised that video gives you no perception of size. If we hadn’t met in this way I would never have started a conversation with her as I would have judged she was too short but more I would have thought she was way younger than she was and just too young. We sat in the back of the cab gently holding hands with her drawing little nervous circles on my palm with her tiny fingers, the feeling was electric!!! Two weeks together and we both knew the deal was sealed although we both had no Idea how we were going to climb the mountains of complexities to make it work, but we did. It was hard work, having to deal with the issues of immigration just to be together. We jumped and we landed on solid ground. What has been most amazing is how we have grown together, many of our polar opposites have found a middle ground or some just a deep understanding of why each of us thinks differently about some things. Sexually we were polar opposites as well and at the start this was likely our most awkward adjustment but as our bond deepened it was like we both went through a sexual awakening which brought us into alignment and minds were blown and continue to be. When I was younger I’d judge relationships harshly with the lists I perceived as necessary but I have learned that there really is no list to happiness, it comes from a bond which may start from as bland a place as can be or be cosmic fireworks. No two relationships are the same and we can likely revel or self destruct in many of them depending on our self awareness and awareness of others. I take this thinking to our time on here, I don’t look for people just like us but for different strokes, to explore others. Now sure there has to be some physical attraction but without that extra, intangible spark it wouldn’t matter how hot someone was we wouldn’t enjoy the escape as much

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