M42

Of subject lines, drawing attention and talking about yourself

March 30 2013

OK, I'm going to admit that I'm a total amateur at this whole RHP thing so I'm looking for a little advice, When I've sent messages I've had a few people open them, even occasionally check out my profile but so far unlucky in scoring a reply, even a knockback. Now obviously I know that most of the women on this site are so swamped that sending a no message with all the whys and wherefores is expecting a bit much so I thouhg I might ask here:What should be in the opening message?Firstly what makes a good subject line? I admit that I have trouble with these and I feel that the ones that I have sent have either been deliberately lame puns (a risk giving that its text so people may not see the joke) or hopelessly generic. What do people think is the key to an effective subject line?Secondly comes the message itself. If it were me being messaged I would want something along the lines of the following,- Reference to the contents of my profile to show that it has been actually read- Showing how our interests as listed in our profiles align- Invitation to check out their profile and reply to check each other's availabilityNow that's pretty much how I set out each of my messages but as I think about reasons for non-response my theory has turned to maybe because I'm not giving enough information about myself, so on a site like RHP what sort of information do:A) Ladies like to see in an introductory message about a guy that encourages them to meet him andB) What sort of things have guys who have a pretty good success rate do to get that reply?Thanks for reading, and for hopefully replying!

Comments

RHP User

12 years ago

Is locked Face picture is a important even if its in your private gallery The men that get sex are the good looking guys the women that get laid are the...well every woman on here if they want it. Its a shot in the dark , just dont be a crass lame prick and have respect just like you would offline too many men to0 few women, write on the forums that seems to get attention but you already know that good luck with it all

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

Oops, was doing some fine tuning this morning, so yes am locked atm. But thanks for having a look tuscan. I guess my main focus wasn't what I can and can't control in terms of attractiveness (aside from running of some kilos or toning up, etc) but more in terms of getting through with that inital contact. Many people talk about 'standing out' or 'not being cliche so really I was wondering if people had examples or advice in terms of what successful people on here do to secure a reply? Or is it all pure eye candy? If so time to hit the gym again! :)

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

If you lived closer to me (which nobody does dammit) I'd do you Your profile and pics look good to me, and your messaging approach sounds fine as well, really I'm not sure there's that much more you can do in that respect. And you're posting on the forums which is sure to attract some extra attention. I'm sure if you keep plugging away you will find people, it can just take awhile to get your first bite. And if you're ever in Townsville, you have a willing volunteer here Good luck!!

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

But get someone to take the pictures and no blured if you can help it some of your face pics are good the others you look a little like your caught in the cross hairs I am sure you will do just fine but yes its eye candy for most and your eye candy and eye candy with a brain is even better have fun

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

You're doing all the right things. Clear face pics, a well written profile and (important to a fair few of us) good punctuation. I do agree with Tuscan that it might be good to have the pics taken by someone else, or with a timer. Personally I ask that men include something from my profile in their email heading. All messages titled "hi", are an immediate no. But it still comes down to the laws of attraction. And I don't care much about body shape (though I'm a self-admitted heightist), it's all about the face. Good luck!

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

Thanks ladies for the positive reinforcement, I was mucking around on some of my face pics, sometimes I forget that my face isn't quite as expressive as I like to think it is! Good to know that I'm not barking up the wrong tree, makes it easier to be persistent if your confident your doing it at least semi-right.So again, thanks again all for the feedback , was much appreciated.

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

OP, I hope it turns out well for you. I've been experimenting with different approaches, in a kind of vague, quasi-scientific way... no particular trends to share at this time, but I figure that old saying "nothing changes if nothing changes" is probably fair. Hell, I've even posted my arse against my better judgement, in response to advice / dare. - Posted from rhpmobile

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

Quoting 'Messolonghi' OP, I hope it turns out well for you. I've been experimenting with different approaches, in a kind of vague, quasi-scientific way... no particular trends to share at this time, but I figure that old saying "nothing changes if nothing changes" is probably fair. Hell, I've even posted my arse against my better judgement, in response to advice / dare. - Posted from rhpmobile

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

I think that I could take a better shot ...

reply

like
Mischeviouslad

12 years ago

Mr Outofnames.....Spend enough time in the forums and youll quickly see that women complain about how big a dumbarse soooo many guys in here can be.Attraction is NOT just about how you look...... something so many people still try to argue against.So to stand out, you simply need to write a profile and have general photos that are interesting.... intriguing..... the kind of person that others are drawn, or compelled to want to learn more about. And that holds true in THIS asylum, and outside of it in the real world where people still need to interact in an effective manner.When it comes to messaging, firstly, consider that a large number of female profiles in here, arent. So expect a high % of ignored messages if you send them without first evaluating the bona fide of the profile.Messages dont need to say a lot, but they should be interesting, creative, and prove that youve read their profile and shown some interest in what they have to say (and not just a "Hey, youre hot, wanna meet up?" like the majority of dumbarses send.)Just have fun with it and dont have pre-determined outcomes.D

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

with what has been said so far... I thought it was a tad long...I will say that I hate these messages & got about 12 of them on Thursday or Friday... Almost word for word.Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", how ya doing?Hi, I am "John Boring Doe".Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", liked your profile, can you tell me more about yourself?Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", liked your profile, check mine out & let me know if it sparks any interest.Come on guys! Are you serious???!!!

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

Quoting 'OneEmerald'Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", how ya doing?Come on guys! Are you serious???!!! Hey, it works for Joey in Friends. Oh wait, it is not real.OP. I've had comments that my messages can be a bit long winded and that puts the ladies off. So much for using the Rudd method. Your introductory messages should be short and sweet, shows that you have read the lady's profile as well as comes across as someone who meets their criteria. The comments provided by the other users are very helpful, especially from Mischievous Lad and Tuscan. You will do fine.

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

Quoting 'OneEmerald'Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", how ya doing?Hi, I am "John Boring Doe".Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", liked your profile, can you tell me more about yourself?Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", liked your profile, check mine out & let me know if it sparks any interest. But while I think that most guys reading this would agree the first two examples are not acceptable, a lot may think there is nothing wrong with the last one. It is polite, enciting and shows you've read our profile, right? Wrong. It looks like template you wrote and sent out to 50 of us at once. It makes such a difference if you include my name in your message, and mention at least one specific thing you read in my profile. If not, I may just not believe you when you say you "recognised" yourself "completely" in what I wrote.

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

I just got one of those. Of course with "Hi" as the subject: "How r u? I'll be in Townsville on Tuesday, wanna catch up? Matt xx"Um, no I don't wanna catch up.Quoting 'OneEmerald' with what has been said so far... I thought it was a tad long...I will say that I hate these messages & got about 12 of them on Thursday or Friday... Almost word for word.Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", how ya doing?Hi, I am "John Boring Doe".Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", liked your profile, can you tell me more about yourself?Hi, I am "John Boring Doe", liked your profile, check mine out & let me know if it sparks any interest.Come on guys! Are you serious???!!!

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

My I suggest some better photos? Not blurry ones and please smile! Smiling pictures are good. I also like pictures of people where they are doing something interesting like travel shots, or sports, or playing chess, whatever. Not sure if men just like to look at women's pictures as body parts but women like to see the whole person and they want to know. Are you interesting? Will we have anything in common? And are you really interested in me or have you sent the same message to 50 girls... in other words if they sense your interest isn't real it will be a NEXT!

reply

like
sweetgem

12 years ago

1) I look for the content of the email;2) I check to see if he's seeking MAN, GROUP, and TV/TS...........if he did, then I would simply close his profile without reading further; if not, then comes the below bullet points lol3) I look for the quality of profile pic or pics in the PG, and I don't just mean whether the pics are clear or not, I do mean whether I see a clearly shot face pic or just man's genital or pics of him with other women pumping before, during and after;4) I check his relationship status, drinking and smoking habit;5) I check his sexual interest to see whether he's into anal sex or not, especially if he was on the receiving end of anal sex or not.The list would go on if I was to list them all out, but I don't think my fellows would be interested to read them lol so all I can say is each to their own liking and like the real time dating, you just need to be patient and wait for the compatible one to surface :-)

reply

like
Mischeviouslad

12 years ago

Sweetgem... while I agree about the body of your message... I disagree about the subject line.A female friend is on this profile, and one night she showed me her email inbox.In one day there were more than 120 flirts and messages, and most of the emails had the subject line along the lines of...HiHey (hey sexy)Wanna hook upYoure hotetcIf the subject didnt inspire or compel her to open the email, she would simply delete it.... her reasoning being that those messages with if the guy didnt The three things we see first when someone contacts us are the subject line, the profile photo.... and the name they chose to represent themselves...... And because she received so many messages she had limited time to go through them all.... she had to sort through and filter them quicky.So if those three factors failed to intrigue, interest or compel her to want to know more... she deleted the message.And she made this decision on the basis of all of the messages she had received in the past... where the subject was a solid indicator of the message attached.DG

reply

like
RHP User

12 years ago

Quoting 'sweetgem'I check to see if he's seeking MAN, GROUP, and TV/TS...........if he did, then I would simply close his profile without reading further; if not, then comes the below bullet points lolLive a little!!

reply

like

Of subject lines, drawing attention and talking about yourself

Comments

Tags

Boards

Forum help