M42
Please help me with some advice
July 26 2014
Comments
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RHP User
10 years ago
Harden the fuck up, loosen up :D
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OPNmarriagecpl
10 years ago
Your pictures are fine and profile reads well but your; "I'm quiet picky, no girls taller than 177 and heavier than 70" comment may not work for some. It seems to be quite specifically demanding and segregating. You surely don't need to have actually stated that in your profile to avoid such a terrible encounter. Maybe it's just me (Mrs), I am taller than and heavier than but wouldn't put, "No Balding middle aged Persian men" in my profile like I was so vehemently repulsed by those characteristics. We are picky also but Id wait until I received a message from set person with undesired attributes and respond very kindly with; thanks but no thanks. - Posted from rhpmobile
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OPNmarriagecpl
10 years ago
Sorry, wasn't trying to reiterate a point, damn mobile app. Sorry😊 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
Hi MattSem, Firstly, we would suggest that you maybe put a bit more information into your "about me" section. There are a seemingly endless supply of single males on RHP and a little bit of effort to stand out amongst the crowd can go a long way. Secondly, it might pay to not be so picky about the criteria that you are searching for, i.e. "im quiet picky, no girls taller than 177 and heavier than 70". Whilst we understand that you are obviously after a specific type, there are a lot of fantastic people on RHP and you never know what great experiences that you are missing out on by having such a limited scope. Lastly, we would suggest that you maybe smile in at least one of your photo's. Everyone here has at least one thing in common; we are all after a good time, and you come across as very serious in your pics. Some pics that show more of your personality and sense of humour certainly wouldn't hurt your chances. We hope that you will take our advice as the constructive criticism that we intend it to be, and we wish you all the best in your endeavours.
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TheLuckyOne
10 years ago
The women you are messaging don't meet your height and weight requirements?
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RHP User
10 years ago
As a woman on site, I would reject u too.(..Even if I did meet yr clinical requirements of being no more than 177 in height, and 70 p in weight). And no time for games and drama... U come across as a using, disrespectful, antagonistic, arrogant woman hater, who wants the perfect woman, hot sex, wam bam...Now Fuck Off..!!! I'm sorry to be blunt, but u asked for advice, so maybe change yr profile, yr judgmental criteria, and yr attitude....Good Luck..!!! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
You shouldn't look and dress like Jason Statham. Women think you're out of their league? ;) Or it's because women you approach are "picky" too? :P - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
Learn to be modest. Otherwise, this site will humiliate you. We love single guys and have lots of fun with select ones, but In our opinion , your profile reads a little pretentious and your images are a bit wanky. Smile for one, you look like you're a gang member! We'd say a lot of girls are not going to feel comfortable meeting you. Its our thoughts and obviously its not true in real life, but its how you market yourself on here. - Posted from rhpmobile
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usnow
10 years ago
They probably look at your profile and think " I don't think I could love this guy as much as he loves himself "
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RHP User
10 years ago
Put more of what you enjoy doing rather than what you don't want, it comes across as.... Get in line and I'll choose the best of the bunch.... Just remember, if your in a bar, how would you approach a girl (yeah, no sleazy pick up lines), you've actually got to work a little bit harder because you can't make eye contact!!! Good luck
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RHP User
10 years ago
You say in your profile that you're picky, so maybe others fear you might not like them once you start chatting to them or meet them and just not going somewhere they think they might be rejected at a certain point.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Try this. Pretend you are a woman, read your profile objectively, and ask yourself if you would be at all tempted to meet you based on what your profile says. Your profile is very boring, and negative. Basically, all you've done is point out that you're very busy (most of us are), that you're quite picky, and what you don't want in a woman. Where is the incentive for a woman to be interested in you, what sort of benefit is it going to be to her to meet you (even if she meets your picky standards)? Based on your profile (which like it or not is how people are initially judging you on here), not much at all.
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Balham
10 years ago
Smile in your pics and go to parties, be friendly and socialise, because that is the real world and this isn't!
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Balham
10 years ago
Great man advice there!!!! :))
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RHP User
10 years ago
It is a buyer's market and you have to sell yourself. I have gone through at least 4 versions of my profile before settling on something which I am comfortable presents me in the best light whilst still being honest. Each time I had a female friend of mine review the profile, including photos, to ask her opinion. She was great at giving constructive criticism (between snorts of laughter). Her advice was similar to what was said above, ie don't have any negativity, sound upbeat and only talk about your strengths. A recent survey of online dating sites suggested that the most successful profiles included a combination of references to physical fitness (but not OTT gym junkies which were a negative factor), empathy (to show emotional maturity) and enjoyment/happiness (the reward on offer for making the contact).
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RHP User
10 years ago
Picky
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Twisted_Mister
10 years ago
Please, lighten up. I understand your concerns, but from your pics looking as hard as you can to be a model won't cut it. Tell the girls a bit about yourself - not just that you're picky. And please also spell correctly - you wouldn't believe how much bad grammar turns off some people. Say a) that you like to have fun, and b) what you do to have fun. Sorry, but your profile seems to say that if you're not a supermodel at the right height and weight, then you can piss off. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
The smoking thing puts people off as well. Not much you can so about that but give up. I agree that friendly smiling profiles are much more attractive. :-)
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RHP User
10 years ago
OP is too serious :|
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RHP User
10 years ago
And quite honestly I have no idea if you grew up here or what... However..... The forum whore that I am; a Pakistani guy asked why women in his own country liked him but not the girls out here... That answer for me lied in his cultural upbringing. The women in his own country were conditioned to be submissive to the men... Whereas out here; they're conditioned to be their own person.....and rightfully so too.... So it means you have to do more than just show up...... - Posted from rhpmobile
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guykinkster
10 years ago
Hi. Its all patience and practice. Same as going out on the town. You can't come on too strong, girls are usually the ones being chased so you need to ease into their good graces, (you can't just snap your fingers online or in a pub), you need to strike up some conversations and see where they go, be patient, understand they don't all want to just fall into bed with you (unbelievable but true my friend). Its like a reflection of the real world. Lets face it. If you were an irresistible stud out on the town you probably wouldn't be spending much time here. You've got to work your assets and earn it here too. All in all I think its just a method of putting yourself in front of more prospects probably with the same % of results. Granted you can look for girls who have specific likes if you think you need to but that just reduces your potential matches. No guarantees here, never were.
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Mischeviouslad
10 years ago
Quoting 'SimpleNeeds2' It is a buyer's market and you have to sell yourself. I have gone through at least 4 versions of my profile before settling on something which I am comfortable presents me in the best light whilst still being honest. .... A recent survey of online dating sites suggested that the most successful profiles included a combination of references to physical fitness (but not OTT gym junkies which were a negative factor), empathy (to show emotional maturity) and enjoyment/happiness (the reward on offer for making the contact). Thats where I disagree... then... agree.... then disagree again. Too many in here feel compelled, through either a sense of male competition, or, because they're quite simply totally enamoured with themselves...... that they sell themselves... waaaaayyy....tooo... hard.... If you saw a guy flexing up at the beach, or taking a naked selfie at the gym, or telling you all about how he loves to lick you all night long and how you simply won't regret it....... you'd think he was a bit of a wanker. Then,... you mentioned presentation, and honestly. And finally, the references to what is generically effective, and people asking what is effective, does cause me to think people will simply write what women want to read when its clearly not reflective of the person who wrote it. IE... advertising. I used to offer a considerable volume of advice. Now as a result of being abused by the very people who asked for that advice, because it didn't suit their ego to acknowledge their failings and change.... (even though THEY asked!) .......Im more inclined to let people use their own words as they will better reflect themselves. And if those word say... (paraphrase) " look at my dick, aren't I wonderful I will lick you all night, you won't be disappointed hehe"... then that is the kind of dude he is... and you can make an informed decision. DG
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PartyOrg
10 years ago
The only thing going for you is your 6pack. Apart from that your profile is very dull, lacks creativity and almost sounds as though you are making a business transaction. 1. Get verified, it takes only a few seconds and goes a long way in showing you are real. 2. Delete your about me and looking for section and rewrite it from scratch. Make it interesting instead of generic you have to stand out. 3. When you send messages to women or couples read their profile completely, your message should be engaging. If the messages you have been sending are anything like your about me and looking for section, your chances are very slim. Just a few helpful tips hope I didn't come off as rude.
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rupamohan
10 years ago
Move your picky criteria to step 2 that is pvt messaging stage..when someone has contacted you. That way you still get what you want without upsetting many by reading a public profile, who think being picky is arrogance. Remember in the art of communication between a stupid person and an intelligent person...the intelligent person will have to bridge the gap..this is a general statement not mean to demean RHP members.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Don't try hide, the forumites will find you........ I am VERY surprised that you haven't even made an effort to change your profile............ G-d I really hope you didn't think that if you put your name on the forums, then more people would "see" you and think what have we been missing!!! Lol, that would be like a death wish, as a lot of us look at your More Actions and Activities section and see what you have been on the Forums about......... Gotcha
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RHP User
10 years ago
At least you're honest and know what you want, whether that gets you anywhere is a different matter. Be straight to the point and you get called picky, lie and you're called fake. You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't my friend. This site is full of judgmental people, you'll fit in just fine. As the Marquis de Sade said: "Either kill me or take me as I am, because I'll be damned if I ever change"
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RHP User
10 years ago
I really appreciate your comments. Thanks for the time you put into it
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RHP User
10 years ago
I wanted to thank you all for your inputs, some great tips and advices thereI wanted to reply and thank each an everyone of you individually but I didn't know how so here it goesI really appreciate the time you all put into writing the comments. Great people
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'PartyOrg' The only thing going for you is your 6pack. Apart from that your profile is very dull, lacks creativity and almost sounds as though you are making a business transaction. 1. Get verified, it takes only a few seconds and goes a long way in showing you are real. 2. Delete your about me and looking for section and rewrite it from scratch. Make it interesting instead of generic you have to stand out. 3. When you send messages to women or couples read their profile completely, your message should be engaging. If the messages you have been sending are anything like your about me and looking for section, your chances are very slim. Just a few helpful tips hope I didn't come off as rude. very helpful, not rude at all. I guess when i'm asking for everyones opinion i'm ready to hear anything about verification I've tried few times. never worked. Apparently they have to send me a message on my phone but they never did
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'MissDanger' At least you're honest and know what you want, whether that gets you anywhere is a different matter. Be straight to the point and you get called picky, lie and you're called fake. You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't my friend. This site is full of judgmental people, you'll fit in just fine. As the Marquis de Sade said: "Either kill me or take me as I am, because I'll be damned if I ever change" Great quote, really enjoyed it
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'woody_pusscat' Picky One emoticon worth a million words thanks, it was great. got your point
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Luckdragon23' Try this. Pretend you are a woman, read your profile objectively, and ask yourself if you would be at all tempted to meet you based on what your profile says. Your profile is very boring, and negative. Basically, all you've done is point out that you're very busy (most of us are), that you're quite picky, and what you don't want in a woman. Where is the incentive for a woman to be interested in you, what sort of benefit is it going to be to her to meet you (even if she meets your picky standards)? Based on your profile (which like it or not is how people are initially judging you on here), not much at all. That was immensely helpful, looking at it objectively, now i'm thinking i wouldn't want to meet that guy :)thanks for the advice
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OPNmarriagecpl
10 years ago
I think I can hear crickets 😂 Oh, by the way OP, if and when you do decide to scrap your profile and put some effort and heart into a new one........ Work on your spelling👍👍 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
its the site dont think anyfurther than that. sign of times . shallow people who think 18 and looks to die for at all ages. sex should be fiun. it is not an interview. if you manage to get a number talk to person... great sex is about more than looks. good luck hang in there and try othersites. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Mischeviouslad
10 years ago
Remember..... he DID ask. What happens next is up to him
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Mischeviouslad
10 years ago
Remember..... he DID ask. What happens next is up to him
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RUUBUN
10 years ago
Got the same problem, can somebody help me here too, - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'MissDanger' At least you're honest and know what you want, whether that gets you anywhere is a different matter. Be straight to the point and you get called picky, lie and you're called fake. You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't my friend. This site is full of judgmental people, you'll fit in just fine. As the Marquis de Sade said: "Either kill me or take me as I am, because I'll be damned if I ever change" "If your profile has a photo of your penis please don't contact me, I really won't have any respect for you." We all judge to some extent, and we all have our preferences. And there's no need to lie in a profile. The OP can be straight to the point and truthful about what he wants, but there are many ways to frame it so that it doesn't sound as harsh and negative as it did.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Matsen...U have 'chaned' your profile by deleting the physical attributes u require in a women, and yr ethnicity....Big deal..!! Make more of an effort in yr profile, and women might take u seriously....You say..'thanks for the advice, was helpful yada yada.... But it is soulless....Try again... - Posted from rhpmobile
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