Polyamory / Monogymy....

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  I have thought about what a polyamorous lifestyle would be like for me for somewhere near 20years.   From the time I was having sex on a regular basis I began to realise that I was losing interest in the sex side of the relationship even when the joys of being with the person were still strong. This could be as soon as 3 months but usually seems to be around 12 months.   For me to keep interest in the physical relationship I knew I needed to introduce others to the playfield. This I tried on occassion when I thought my partners may be amenable to the idea. This lead to some horrific outcomes and the occassional win although for each of my partners this was an experiment for them and a lifestyle for me.   Mostly I didn't try and the relationships slowly died an (un)natural death. I can say that not once did I play around on my partners simply because I believe in trust and because by definition I obviously needed my partner involved. As time went on I found that the more I liked a girl the less likely I was to ask them out because I would possibly hurt them.   I fell in love three times throughout my life and finally got married at 38 with the certainty borne of discussion and participation that my wife was comfortable with me being bisexual and us being swingers. We couldn't have children which we had come to terms with and work became 'our thing'. Shortly after the marriage I was expected to 'straighten up' and 'narrow down' my sexual preferences. I tried and the marriage failed.   Lived through and survived all that and we are both still happy etc etc. So when I think about it now I wonder what it would have been like to have given my trust and love to 3, 4, 5? others of a like mind.   I haven't heard of anyone else that has such a short term sexual interest span as me. Maybe there are many males and females who think the same. Love to see if there are more people like this.   Maybe polaymoury would have helped.

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  For me, it depends on who I'm with.With regards to my ex, I was not willing to share. I thought that I was a polyamorous girl, but not once I fall in love. My brain can't handle having that many relationships - I get emotional. hehCurrently, I'm in multiple relationships. Some are just for sex, some are more deep than that. However, I still regard myself as single.I think polyamory is a serious decision to make and not a "start of the relationship" thing, but something that needs to be discussed and probably maintained from the very beginning.Having said that though, I think at some point, someone might end up being more attached to a particular person than the others and some pain might be involved.If you're aware of what may occur and with your normal partner agree that if something goes awry, you will stand by each other, then it just might work out.Good luck!

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  It has come up to think about in the sense of it sounded like something would like. I don't think humans, generally, were designed to be with one person only. Of course, you have a main or first love etc but why can't you bring in a mutually liked/loved person IF both in the already formed relationship want it and a "potential" is found. I can see it could work..all supportive, loving etc.Jealously could be an issue...

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  inspirit

  12 years ago

  I was approached by this a while ago and now has me thinking as I quite an independent person and don't want to be in a "relationship"

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  well i have been in 3, 3 way relationships and 4 play with whom ever you wish relationships , i prefered the 3 way relationships as the trust and honesty issues werent as much an issue and we shared everythin as you would in a one on one but yet with all relationships i have been let down by the others dishonesty me personally i could love 2 or more ladies but i think id stop at 3 but i think 2 would be more then enough i have been in 2 relationships with it being mmf which was great but eh better relationship that lasted the longest and it was the ladies who faught with each other in the end was the better and more trusting and i never looed at another lady out side of my 2 ladies i mean why would you. id like to have another 3 way relationship in fact i think i could marry 2 ladies and have a family with them and live quite happily ever after like that its just the chance of that happening isnt that great ... hense why im here to atleast what fun and naughtyness i can get up to whilst im still on this planet

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Are you willing to try a polyamorous relationship?

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  zoe69r

  12 years ago

  mm this sounds like a very good life style , i would certianly like to try this at some stage and yes with a normal male / female couple just as long both wer bi

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Quoting 'dotmelie'Are you willing to try a polyamorous relationship?

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  oops , try again the answer to that is yes of course

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Currently J and I ARE in a polyamorous relationship yes. With me (ember - F) finding another person to have a relationship with as well as J. Ideally I want nothing more than for J to find someone who he has a connection with and for him to be able to explore this as well.Yes there are issues, jealousy, insecurities, lack of time. But we are fortunate that we have a very open relationship and can communicate with each other. Everyone involved is aware that if they feel anything or need to vent something that is bothering them, that they can and will not be attacked for it. That is key... in my opinion anyways lol

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