RHP

RHP User

M41 F41

Polyamory relationships

April 22 2013

So I have recently discovered that I am more interested in a poly triad relationship rather than just one night stands with another girl and hubby. What I'm stuck on though is that as soon as you put the Poly label on to a relationship it's taboo. I'm surprised its still such an in the closet idea for most. I also haven't seen many identify as poly here, so my question is, are there any openly poly relationships here? Also are there really single (or poly) girls who are interested in these relationships here? I have joined a couple of other groups but am finding hard to chat to people about this. I/we would love to meet "the one" and have a relationship but in the meantime I'm curious and excited to learn more about the lifestyle. - Posted from rhpmobile

Comments

  • inspirit

    inspirit

    12 years ago

    I recently posted a topic called the "Third wheel" as I am interested on how this works. "The dynamics"... It is ismethng I am considering though do not want to jump in blind folded.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I can't seem to see your post inspirit? What category did you post it under? For us, I (Mrs) am not a jealous person so I actually want Mr to have an additional relationship to ours that I can occasionally join in with. I hope to have a nice friendship with the partner though. I guess the dynamics would be different in every relationship depending on personality traits but I don't know. I would love to find the right person to find out haha but I would rather wait to find the perfect partner than settle for anything less- Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    At last an interesting topic....pity not many posters. There are several good books on this including "The Ethical Slut". I think that it sounds like the ideal ( I think my wife should have 2 husbands if she wants) but difficult to learn to cope with the jealousy and get the balance. There are several websites to cater for poly's but this is probably not the one. My best wishes in your travels.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Great Topic Caffyangel, glad you brought it up, because I was just about to post on same!I (female counterpart) would love to meet a couple or single through this site who would be interested in more than just sex and just one meeting, I guess it feels awkward to ask because all those old misgivings come up 'maybe they don't want that', 'maybe they don't like us enough'....etc...But I would LOVE to meet a young couple in Syd who were open to more of a relationship between everyone than just sex...shame you are so far away :-(xx

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Poly people are few and far between on the site, most people I meet through socials use OKC to get in touch with others. A lot of Poly people don't want the "swinger" stigma attached to their lifestyle, and to be fair the with the amount of people who think Poly is all about screwing around I don't blame them. I'm still learning and exploring, and the forums here are pretty good for discussions and interactions.This site is primarily caters to monogamous relationships (or affairs) and partner swapping. I have no problems with people cheating, but I don't want to be in the same box - The fact that I can't select "Open" or "Polyamorous" in the Relationship field annoys me more than it should,.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Phew so it's not just me finding it hard to meet people I'm the lifestyle? What is OSK? I'm off to google lol I guess it's weird as I find there seems to be a social stigma on poly yet swinging is now seen as acceptable. Poly is just less about sexual encounters and more about a whole relationship with another. They can be so similar yet so different too. I have found Fetlife to be interesting and have a larger poly community but there is no dating area and their forums are very slow. Oh and I'm off to get a copy of the ethical slut, I have seen that mentioned before so I think I need to read it!- Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    How would you distinguish between a polyamorous relationship and simply putting it as 'friends with benefits'? Like many others that posted in Inspirit's 'third wheel' post, I think that in the case of two established couples/an established couple and a single meeting regularly there is always a certain level of imbalance in that the primary relationship/s will always prevail. I think that a true polyamorous relationship is when three plus people get together without any prior establishment of relationships and all of the relationships which are then formed between all of them are equal... it's difficult to derive a completely equal connection with two people though - you wouldn't be able to say that in the case of two couples having a polyamorous relationship, that your attention is equally divided between the three other individuals. Just my perspective...

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Why does the couple have to have a relationship with the same single person? What if they have different tastes? Needs and wants? Kinks? You have only described one scenario there.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    A very good book you should read if you are interested in the lifestyle is The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy. Also why can't some have a primary relationship and FWBs? I think you are trying to limit the lifestyle to only one form of relationships. It doesn't have to be that way.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    For 6 months I was in a V-relationship, my Primary (I hate the "rankings" and don't adhere to it, but it fits in this scenario) was seeing a woman I had no contact with. I knew of her, knew that I was also in the picture, and knew that we didn't plan on meeting each other to form any kind of relationship. I was totally cool with this, as my Primary wanted a female relationship, and we're both non-monogamous and communicate freely and openly.Pick up Opening Up by Tristan Taormino after reading Ethical Slut, it's really good