F40
Real Names
June 20 2016
Comments
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AnnieWhichway
8 years ago
If im playing as Annie, no need, I'm Annie all night long.....and breakfast as well If playing as a male I will give out mine when they do. But never a surname. No need and mines too well known. Annie
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RHP User
8 years ago
I don't see any real harm in a first name, or maybe use your nick name if you are replying on the basis of perhaps exchanging another email. If for any reason you feel it would jeopardise your identity and you don't wish for that to happen then don't use it. Just play it cool as nobody knows your personal circumstances and therefore can't really judge or give concrete advice. Be a woman of mystery for awhile if in any doubt. For me personally I've always used the rule of thumb of what you would do in a bar or other social setting. If they said "Hi my name is Jim... what's yours" how would you respond - do the same here. You might politely say you're with friends and tell him to have a great night or you might say "Hi Jim ... Im ..." I do have an exception here and that's the "standard" email. You get to know them, there is nothing personal about them or they are too scripted. You just know they are sending volume hoping for a response not necessarily taken the time to see if they are attracted to you at all. Not worth your time or your name, other than polite no thanks, but just my opinion. Just go with your gut feeling on a case by case basis and if anything feels at all off then back off until you are sure. On the flip side if a guy doesn't give you his name how does that make you feel? Does that make you suspicious of him? I'm sure everyone's different on that point - just food for thought. Surnames definitely only at a comfort point, just as you would with any dating situation. If you are sending an outright "no" reply then definitely no name as it's just not necessary, but always try and remember your manners, doesn't cost a thing and can avoid a lot of unnecessary hurt feelings. Treat others as you'd like to be treated yourself.
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LeMerovingien
8 years ago
I'll usually sign my name in the first message. Sometimes I might abbreviate it if I'm not too sure about the people I'm messaging but I'll usually fix that quite quickly if the messaging goes on. I don't think I've given out my last name to anyone except someone I've met more than once. I don't think there's any need to either unlike a first name. If I'm comfortable with them and I've met a few times I don't see the harm though. I've found that most people I message will sign their name in return upon getting mine.
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aussian43
8 years ago
The first message I send anyone on here usually has my first name and location on the second line. I am not worried about giving it out. As for my surname, I don't offer it up. I can't remember anyone actually asking for it. They could see it when I forward a motel booking confirmation e-mail, or on my stuff when we meet. But I don't think it is a big deal. Out of curiosity I googled my name and profession which I freely give out. Two others working in the same field with the same first name as me show up on the first page of results. Add in the city and my linkedin profile jumps to the top of the search results. It doesn't have a photo on it, but there are not that many in my field.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I hate giving out my first name, until I know them better and trust them. Once it's out there, it's out there, and there are some creepo's out there. This is the internet after all. To be honest, I'm getting more worried about it all the time and don't like giving it out at all. I'd be much happier going ahead with meets calling each other by our allocated special names/user names shortened, whatever. Unless they turn into ongoing and I well trust them, very wary. So I got a message recently that I don't think I even read, can't remember but I saw the first line showing in my inbox which read something like this "Hi what's your name" Whatever he said after that was a waste of effort. Yeah like I'm going to give my name to a complete stranger straight up. A lot of trust has to be built and that trust has been broken so I'm getting more cautious the longer I'm on here
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RHP User
8 years ago
my surname, not on your sweet life. There was one exception, but he was kind of special, I miss him
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RHP User
8 years ago
I tell people straight away.It is the name I am known by but not my formal name,if I told you that I would have to kill you👿Q
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lovman8
8 years ago
I usually sign off with my real first name. I'm a little more circumspect with my surname and where I live.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Bond...Annie Bond. Haha
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On_Safari
8 years ago
But I still get called Indy or Safari......OR only the first letter of my first name ...... Sometimes I'm called other things but that's entirely dependent on your perspective 😈
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RHP User
8 years ago
gets signed off with our first names ... and yes they're our IRL ones. Surnames are usually after a meet, or play, or a few. Depends on whether they are wanting to share. Some people we only know by their first name, but admittedly not many.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Hi I'm Frank and I'm interested then I will give them my shortened first name which is what everyone calls me anyway. I'm the same as Summer - in so much as my first and last names stand out. And I am the only person on the www with my first and last name combination!!! A few RHP members know but that's through friendship. it's a safety issue for me. But if it was someone I was playing with on a regular basis I wouldn't have an issue. As long as I was given similar info.
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RHP User
8 years ago
...someone private messages me and they feel genuinely warm, then I'll share my first name straight away. I have nothing to hide, it's a common name and I'm not a criminal, so.... Just yesterday I shared the password to my computer with a stranger in Germany I was paying to service it remotely. That was a little scary to watch...but it made me appreciate I just trust most everyone on face value...the person at the bank, the locksmith or the one behind a counter that I give my credit card details too. Can't be scared of the boogyman all the time.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Many profile names are convoluted and it is often more personal to user first names. However other profile names shorten well to provide a good nick name which personifies better than a real name. Exchanging surnames is unnecessary, hazardous and I advise against it.
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inspirit
8 years ago
When I give it out.. No paranoia here. Facebook has flashed a few of your pretty faces across my feed, "people you may know". You being one of them Summer and Koko another. Nothing is private on the WWW. You're kidding yourself uf you think it is. 😊 Now I think the Winterfell chick is preggers. - Posted from rhpmobile
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neapolitan_guy
8 years ago
I'm very cautious for a few reasons, don't trust online, unique family name and protect my privacy. I've been burnt online and had my privacy stolen, I felt violated hence being so cautious. I've relaxed a little since this was last mentioned. I would only give my first name if I was to meet someone and at meet and greets, now I'll sign off on a message if they use their real name or abreviation suggesting some freindlyness or trust. For me there's a degree of trust required before mention surname. Having no secrets I feel it's important someone know's who I am just not straight away when were just saying hi sort of thing though if they offer their name I give my full name, seems only fair and the trust is equal. Cheers
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RHP User
8 years ago
You came up on my fb as people I may know too.But of course you can only see the connection if they have their face pic on here.
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Lovinit28andKC72
8 years ago
I give my first name straight away, it's my name, I like it and I don't mind if people know it. Surname is a little different, so a few trusted playmates and friends in here know it. I have a sick sense when it comes to people, so I think the people who have my full name, I can trust and I'm happy with that. 💋
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RHP User
8 years ago
I don't have a problem giving my first name in a first message if it's someone I've responded to positively (i.e. potential for ongoing communication and / or meeting). Don't give my last name until after I've met someone and as far as I can tell they're not dodgy, since I have an unusual last name. But Inspirit certainly has a point, and if someone was really that motivated to find out more about you for some reason then they probably could. I'm careful but I don't stress about every minute aspect of trying to protect my identity. I've also had people from RHP pop up on my FB and I've almost certainly popped up on theirs. Doesn't matter how careful you are you can't control everything in life.
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RHP User
8 years ago
A couple of men who have given me fake first names,it was only weeks after meeting them that I found out..I found it really weird 👿Q
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DynamicCouple36
8 years ago
We have very unusual first names & surname, and tend to rather use a shortened version ( nickname) of our first names with people from here and others, off this site. There is never any need, on here, to use ones surname and if asked for it (on here) we never would divulge. One just never knows when things may go pear shaped, with the wrong person, and we would not to end up with someone stalking and or harassing us.
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nattyocean
8 years ago
I'm known by my name on here IRL anyhow well the first part and so will sign off using my full name generally 2/3 messages in which generally coincides with opening pics etc. but last name hmmm not until I have met them in person and developed a rapport/relationship of kinds and always very selectively. Facebook I did find a little over 12 months ago though was mixing my private and public a bit too closely for my liking with people who I might have been texting with from rhp etc flashing up on my "people you might know". I found out it was a setting that was going through my contacts list and then matching with Facebook accounts. I found this a bit disconcerting and I found out how to switch it off as being on Facebook is another level again for me and only one person off rhp has made it there so far. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Tall74nHard9
8 years ago
general correspondence on site, I will usually sign off with my standard abbreviation of 'Tall'. As with Summer, I have a very unique first Christian name (which a few of you know), and will generally not disclose it unless I feel comfortable enough with the person I am corresponding with. If I am pressed for a name by someone with whom I do not feel that way, I will either let them know so, or will use one of my other Christian names. The subject of surname here has never come up, and again it would depend on the why's and wherefore's of the request, but generally it is something I would avoid. I have actually previously done a Google search of my name, simply out of curiousity, and I personally have not come up in it.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Nope. They can have my first name as it's a common name, she however uses a play name.Her real name is actually one of the most widely used Asian names in the world but to hard to pronounce and really not needed in situations we put ourselves in. Last names we never hand out.
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Seachange
8 years ago
i give my nickname, which is Lily , when I receive a first message. and succeeding messages. Only after I have met and made connections with people outside the realms of the rhp virtual walls, will I actually give my real name. I have met some fantastic friends here, non-sexual, and they know my name but guess what... they still call me Lily and I am ok with that. Hard to shake old habits. I respond to both my real name and Lily, But I never give my surname. Too close to home and you never know. I never ask people their surname, a bit presumptuous of me to assume they want me permanently in their lives and it can make you look like a 'future stalker' . "Hi. My name is Lily X. What is your name? And your last name? What? OMG, how bizarre! My bunny here has the same name and surname! Shut up! How weird is that? I think I love you." '
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'nattyocean' Facebook I did find a little over 12 months ago though was mixing my private and public a bit too closely for my liking with people who I might have been texting with from rhp etc flashing up on my "people you might know". I found out it was a setting that was going through my contacts list and then matching with Facebook accounts. I found this a bit disconcerting and I found out how to switch it off as being on Facebook is another level again for me and only one person off rhp has made it there so far. - Posted from rhpmobile would love to know how to turn that setting off if you dont mind sharing?
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RHP User
8 years ago
We give our names out striaght off the bat. Don't really care if people know we're on here or not. We understand and respect others identities though. And yes, uite a few RHP faces have popped across my FB friends lists lol.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Is your Facebook settings on Public or friends only ? Check that 😀 I have many nicknames childhood , teenage years lol . Some people still don't know my real name even now . I don't give out details to people that I meet willy nilly if I have met them a few times and I know and trust them they have my number , Facebook and know where I live . Once I had this shithead of a guy that I met twice and when I told him no future mets the prick then showed people pics of me , they new my face , he found out everything about me . I get a nasty message I have heard of your ex husband and with his up standing in the community he really wouldn't like it knowing what your up too . I told him to grow up . It's sometimes scary knowing people know everything..
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RHP User
8 years ago
that this isn't RL, this is my life as much as any other part so I use my name freely. What's going to happen? They might talk to me on the street? God forbid I humanize my potential lover! 🙀 This isn't an attack on you OP, AT ALL. Sometimes I go off on rants when asked a question. 😅It's defiantly a reference to anyone thinking there's RL and ID. That's highly insulting to anyone who formed a real relationship or marriage here. Your relationships can only be as deep as you give them room to be. You've got to judge each one. Yes, occasionally in RL I let someone pick me up and don't bother with a name. That's a good indication of that deep connection. I had to delete my validations as they referred to a name but it was a shortening of my old username, not mine. It would have looked ridiculous if I was presenting three names (incl. UN). I've been told fake names before. I can only laugh. That's so childish and a bit elitist IMO. More funny when they use a full name email address linked to their iMessages. 😂 People of the world! I think I got a bit lost.. I introduce myself within three messages. I only hold off that long if they are. Then, I ask. 😉 Good question OP 😊 -Longest. Xx - Posted from rhpmobile
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DynamicCouple36
8 years ago
Our previous "handle" was an Australianised variation / version of our real names. So don't feel "robbed" as sarcasm does not look good on you 💋 - Posted from rhpmobile
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upforthefunxxx
8 years ago
When I contact someone I always give my first name. Same as in life, I won't have a username to meet people in the street
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RHP User
8 years ago
... nice to meet you. How many times do I have to tell you the same thing.
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RHP User
8 years ago
good to see everyone's take on it :) Pink_Sprinckles i had a similar experience where it all went wrong once he knew my identity sorry to hear that happened to you but sounds like you handled it well - my facebook is private but i have had other members pop up as suggested friends so I'm sure its happened in reverse.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'Summersolstice' is my "roll-eyes"/sarcasm face is my "I'm only kidding" face x Really..For me... is my "nudge-nudge-wink-wink"/sarcasm faceis my "I-thought-that-was-funny-but-I'm-too-cool-to-laugh-at-my-own-jokes" faceis my "that-was-definitely-a-joke-and-it-was-fuckin'-funny-hey?" face ..and just means "I'm-in-good-humour-so-please-dont-read-too-much-into-it" ....KoolDave
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sweetgem
8 years ago
How quickly do you give someone you are chatting to your first name? * It depends on whether I initiate the contact or the other party does. It also depends on what base do I contact the person for if I was the one initiating the first contact. I usually sign off with my first name in my messages to people whom I have high interest in meeting up for some company, or to those who I have lots of respect for and just wanted to send a friendly hello/regards without any intention of meeting them for anything more than a simple friendship :) Hence, if anyone receives a message from me with my profile initials sign off, then it is clear that I don't intend to meet them in real life :) I might only be sending them a courteous message to thank them for checking out my profile numerous times, or to give compliment on their well written profiles. However, I am reluctant to give out my real name in my turn down-reply to messages received from the interested men, unless they have given their names first, then I feel it's only polite to return the manners and respect. Do you prefer to be referred to by your username until you get to know the person? * I am not fussy about which names (that is, my profile name or real name) the person I'm chatting addresses me by. So, he can either call me sweetgem or my first name. However, some men are really sweet and often call me gem :)........I do think that I have a good profile name lol (get my joke? 😛) Does it make you uncomfortable if someone asks your name in a first message? * No, I won't feel uncomfortable to be asked for my first name in their first message because, it is only an act of politeness and respect that the person wants to know my name, so perhaps he can address me by my real name. However, I will never give out my surname to people so lightly as it is not necessary in my book! Nor will I ask for people's last name either as it is not important to me. And there is only one person from RHP that knows my real full name as we are also connected off RHP :) Do you ever reveal your surname to play mates? * No, not yet to date anyway, and have no intention to change that safeguard any time soon either :) it is not necessary and irrelevant to what the man and I are connected for anyway. So, my answer is no :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Is a shortened version of what is on my birth certificate, I use it everywhere except work (and I hate that I can't use it there, official paperwork and all ). Mary is the 'affectionate' name my dad used to call me, I like it and it's what I'm called IRL. Yes, some of you appear on my FB feed, either through your contact number or through friends of friends, lol! I wouldn't invade your privacy, I won't even initiate contact! It is interesting that a guy I saw once (and apparently single) has a FB profile with his wife, go figure 😝 Last year at a Melbourne meet and greet, I hired a house and nearly 20 RHPers stayed in the house for nearly 3 days. For security, the owners needed the names of all the guests. I felt terrible asking but everyone was wonderfully gracious giving those details. I haven't, nor will I ever divulge others personal details! Mary xx
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RHP User
8 years ago
My answer is simple was always told manners so if I msg then I'll end it with Tim. But I too am not to tech savvy was speaking to someone via kik and they made the comment about my full name I swear I nearly shit, I asked how they knew turns out I'd stuffed up and put my full name on it. Quickly changed that I did!! - Posted from rhpmobile
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rupamohan
8 years ago
OP I'm curious to know your reason behind the post. Are you just being curious or want to learn from others or faced a situation where sharing or not sharing real name caused issues or something else.... But anyway it is your choice to share your reasons...lol - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
I might use LG instead of my real name to sign off until I decide if i want further contact with someone. If they introduce themselves to me in their first message (not a template message) and I like what they have written then I will reply with my first name also. I don't think I've ever been asked for, or given my surname to a new acquaintance and I don't ask others for theirs either. Surnames have eventually been mentioned and shared in passing with long term friends. One of my pet peeves and why I don't use FB is the auto linking of names and email addresses. Fake names - I had been chatting to someone for a length of time and addressed him by his first name only to find out during our first face to face meeting that he had used a bogus name. Really! My first reaction was "Why? - Are you being stalked by an ex? Are you an international spy? Are you someone famous I should have recognised?" LOL Made me wonder what else was a lie. I continued using his fake name because that is what I associated with him. For me it created distrust and we didn't meet again. LG
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beachgal20
8 years ago
Ok....initial messages are always sned offs as my persona....will only divulge first name after decent conversation...if I feel right.
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Grouse33
8 years ago
Fauntleroy is just too uncommon a name to give me any anonymity - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Then I may do if I'm keen for further contact. One thing i have stopped doing is giving out my number until after i have met them due to the fb thing. I just got a new phone and when installing messenger it requires access to contact list, photos and text messages! - Posted from rhpmobile
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soretongue
8 years ago
Sorry but dad joker in me has to ask- u've got Hotwives Incorporated on your birth certificate? 😝 how very unique/original... carry on ppls
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RHP User
8 years ago
I will use a person's name as think that is polite. But it can be difficult if all you have to go on is their username, e.g. "theamazingsexpiston91" or "hotgrltoohottohandle69er". - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'rupamohan' OP I'm curious to know your reason behind the post. Are you just being curious or want to learn from others or faced a situation where sharing or not sharing real name caused issues or something else.... But anyway it is your choice to share your reasons...lol - Posted from rhpmobile A bit of both, curious about others. I'm not one to give my name out quickly because I have had issues before with someone who wouldn't leave me alone tracking me down on social media whist only knowing my first name -not though messenger syncing - just though typing in my first name and looking for someone by that name in Brisbane as my name is not too common it wasn't too hard to find me - he got all crazy stalker-ish, so I'm pretty wary these days. I also like the anonymity of a username and would like to use that until i feel comfortable with someone - likely sounds crazy to some but I am by nature , a very private person .
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RHP User
8 years ago
I don't use my first name straight away, but it also depends on how I feel the chat is going with to other person.... I always say go with your gut feelings . I won't give out my last name for obvious reasons( being married) but again it will depend on how I feel with a particular play mate and they are not a " bunny boiler"... Crazy stalker ECT - Posted from rhpmobile
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