RHP

RHP User

M53

Sexual / fetish inerests

August 03 2014

I've noticed as my RHP travels have progressed that these areas of people's profiles have a particular effect on my response to the profile. Almost as much as what they write about themselves and what their looking for. In particular, if they're not filled in at all or they only have a couple of items ticked, I tend to move on. It doesn't necessarily matter what the items are, I think it just gives me a vibe of inhibition or lack of adventurousness that causes me to move on. I know this isn't strictly fair, that people have their own reasons for the way they feel about this stuff or choose to fill it in, but that's the way I tend to respond. Which led me to wonder how other people respond to these categories. Are they turned off/on by too little or too much? Are there particular ticked interests/fetishes that appeal to them or conversely repel them? And for anyone who decided not to fill these sections in at all, why not?

Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    tend to look at these things and will pay more attention to the ones that indicate they have the same interests as me, but in saying that I have found that even if they have not indicated certain things on there , upon meeting its a different story and there are things they haven't ticked but are definitely into!Nothing really would repel me but a completely blank canvas would not draw much interest from me.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    grammatical error in my post! "their" should be "they're". These things need an edit function! As you were...

  • Lovinit28andKC72

    Lovinit28andKC72

    10 years ago

    Yes..... They are usually the first things I look at, I'm looking for particular kinks, fetishes in someone. I used to have all but a few ticked in my own sexual interest, participation and fetishes list. But with the quality of messages I was getting, I ask for some advice from a couple of male friends on this site and came to the decision it was just easier to take them all out......💋 But am happy to be completely honest if asked about my kinks, fetishes, likes and dislikes, if asked by someone I'm communicating with......💋

  • Missb4u

    Missb4u

    10 years ago

    But I don't really take much notice of them. I have found if I'm not into something and say so guys either respect that or they move on. I'm happy to discuss all and any fetish and kinks with men I'm engaging with. I actually find a lot of men (not all) but certainly a lot seem to expect that every kink and fetish is on the table from the first meeting. I'm afraid that's not the case with me. I need to be comfortable and feel safe before any of that occurs. I do have some hard limits but I also have some things that I would consider with the right person but I don't have them ticked on my profile. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Yes I reduced a lot of my fetishes from my list as well because this lead to men making certain assumptions about me. As MissB says I am not going to go over and spit in your face, smack you around and treat you like a slave and piss in a wine glass and make you drink it on our first date. .... and yes that was an actual request.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    is sometimes a turn off for me, although I would say that I have too much listed on my own profile...go figure! I don't generally look too hard as often some people list their more usual kinks in their profile writing anyway.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    But find "ask me" all the way down with the generic template given as a description off putting. To me, that indicates they either haven't gotten around to filling out their profile information or haven't bothered.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Or in the middle of it. I find the list of fetish interests very restricted. You may as well be very specific in your profile with what you want to achieve. RHP will let you converse on a few topics within the forums but if it goes a bit too right then your best to leave it at that and have a chat with people who you think you have something in comman.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Just to see if certain fetishes are mentioned like...watersports

  • Smilingwithfun

    Smilingwithfun

    10 years ago

    True for me as well, OP. The "Ask Me " profiles do little for me. If one can take the time to write a profile then I will read it.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Do you ever send messages?......You must know by now ,that RHP women are very shy and retiring little wallflowers xQ

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    As a glance at...... My main focus is always the written word...... Doesn't matter how inarticulate you are, if you can portray yourself on the page then I'm willing to give it a go..... Mmmmmm, one exception would be if everything else was 'ask me'.

  • TheLuckyOne

    TheLuckyOne

    10 years ago

    Too many fetishes listed and it's a turn off for me. Obviously the overall profile is taken into account, but if the cons outweigh the pros, I move on. No point wasting each other's time.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'EuropianBliss' Or in the middle of it. I find the list of fetish interests very restricted. You may as well be very specific in your profile with what you want to achieve. RHP will let you converse on a few topics within the forums but if it goes a bit too right then your best to leave it at that and have a chat with people who you think you have something in comman. That is the key the secret to life HAVE A CHAT it might supprise you.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    But Meeka... That sounds so dam hot!! - Posted from rhpmobile

  • Seachange

    Seachange

    10 years ago

    I tend to assess the whole initial contact (flirt or message) on whether to proceed to communicate further. Whether his message indicates he read my profile, the details in his profile (template profiles a big NO), pictures, marital status and then their fetishes. I sometimes find that fetish list can be a big turnoff for me, depending on what they have. When I first joined the site, I listed down some of the fetishes without knowing what they really mean and when I received tons of messages from men wanting 'experiences' I did not really want to go into, I had to revisit my fetish list and decided to delete it all together so as not to invite unwanted attention. Lol. I prefer to discuss this with men personally.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I can certainly see that some might not like the prescriptive nature of the fetish list, and I feel a bit of that too. It pigeon-holes you in a way that isn't actually indicative of how you are. And also, as you indicate Lily and another thread proved some time back, everyone has different ideas about what a lot of these labels mean. It also makes sex seem a bit forced or premeditated. I'm turned on by my partner being turned on, which is true of a lot of people, so I will experiment with things that she digs even if the thing itself isn't my thing. The fact that it turns her on is enough. Anyhow, I reckon I'll start paying less attention to those categories, because when I look at what I've got listed I don't feel it's in any way an accurate indication of me.

  • Seachange

    Seachange

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'Rick_Blaine' I can certainly see that some might not like the prescriptive nature of the fetish list, and I feel a bit of that too. It pigeon-holes you in a way that isn't actually indicative of how you are. And also, as you indicate Lily and another thread proved some time back, everyone has different ideas about what a lot of these labels mean. It also makes sex seem a bit forced or premeditated. I'm turned on by my partner being turned on, which is true of a lot of people, so I will experiment with things that she digs even if the thing itself isn't my thing. The fact that it turns her on is enough. Anyhow, I reckon I'll start paying less attention to those categories, because when I look at what I've got listed I don't feel it's in any way an accurate indication of me. Dont delete your fetish list yet until I have a perve! Lol.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'lilyorchid' Dont delete your fetish list yet until I have a perve! Lol. Don't worry, I'm not doing any deleting. I'm just not going to give it the attention I have previously when looking at profiles.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'coops14' But Meeka... That sounds so dam hot!! - Posted from rhpmobile But Sweetheart.......... I don't do that with just anybody! Besides, I don't think that is really my style.