M53
Taboo Sex vs Wholesome Sex
November 29 2013
Comments
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Interesting topic, it will be interesting to see the responses. For me BDSM gives me an opportunity to release my evil side ;) sensual evil that is I think I'm a little too impatient for Tantra.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Also yantra requires hard work and effort to get rewards. Bdsm a trip to the sex shop.... Not that I know much about either....
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I meant Tantra
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Tried either, either... Do my nipple clamps count ? I don't think they do because it's the sensation rather than the clamps that do it for me... God I LURVE having my nipples chewed on 😈😈😈😈 Any volunteers ? Hp xo 💌 Because I am worth it...
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I don't know anything about tantra but my first thought is.... Boring. Not sure why. Besides it's the intense sexual connection between two people.. Yes? I would think you only do it with people you are in love with really. Not that I know. BDSM can be like that as well of course. But for most people it's naughty and fun, and adventurous and pushes your boundaries, gets your heart pumping, engages your senses in different ways, and is debaucherous.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Saying "wholesome" sex answers the question really. Who wants wholesome? Everyone knows doing things that are good for you is boring. :P
-
cbdlivin
11 years ago
A number of years ago I explored the Tantra side and while it was good at the start I found I was getting a little bored and in general dissatisfied at a certain level. BDSM play for me has an added component that is more satisfying and always makes me go back for more. The mind if a powerful tool. B
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I believe Tantra and BDSM have some things in common. Both require a certain level of trust to begin with, which can grow and become more intense with practise. Both can have, but not necessarily do have, defined roles. For example, giving or receiving in tantric massage or dominance and submission and sadism and masochism in BDSM. In each case one person takes a lead role at any one time, the other takes the role of being led. Where they differ, in the context of this discussion, in my opinion, is the BDSM relationship is primarily psychological, with each person choosing the role they'll take. Once these roles are chosen, the secondary, physical acts, sexual or otherwise, develop within the confines of what has previously been agreed by both. These acts may then lead to an altered state of consciousness, particularly for the sub. Tantra, on the other hand, once again in my opinion, is primarily experienced through feeling, be it tactilely, emotionally or both. This physical sensation may then also lead to an altered state of consciousness. BDSM and Tantra allow some people to reach physical, emotional and psychological highs they might not get with regular or vanilla sex. Back to the op's point, as was previously mentioned by Awesome, it's much easier to go to a sex shop and buy a toy, but is that all there is to it?
-
RHP User
11 years ago
about the difference between an orchid and a cactus. Both are incredibly beautiful in their own way but I'll take the cactus any day. I think recently that BSDM has had more press. It's fashionable. Tantra just isn't cool at the moment. But what would I know - I'm just a kinky country hick.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Subspace Comes in many forms. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Thank you all for your replies so far. If you take a step back, do you think society is still at an unease with feeling that sexuality is ok in general? We have a long long history of sexual repression. Has this led to a backlash that, to claim the power back, people embrace the concept that sex is naughty, and therefore seek some sort of edge to it? The concept that sex can be spiritual and enlightening is equally as challenging to the notion of sex as taboo and dangerous to ones soul purpose on earth, which has been to transcend/repress all earthly desires. I still find it hard to fathom that more people list spanking on their profiles as sexual interests than people who have actually experienced a 30min+ erotic massage of their genitals with warm oil. I have posted a website Hegre-art dot com on my other thread on Sexual Anatomy as having quality videos of sensual massage. I would think that the boundaries and challenges for deeper states of being lie in the realms of intimacy and surrender with Tantra, as much as BDSM challenges boundaries of control and submission for surrender to an altered/expansive state of consciousness and sexual experience. Would love to hear your perspectives.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
When these boobies have the marks your ass has in your pics, you'll know that I know the difference between an orchid and a cactus.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Can be appreciated for different reasons. Sexuality is a smorgasbord and I want to try a little of everything it has to offer. Ps......all consensual sex is wholesome as far as I'm concerned - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I have seen people orgasm just from spanking. Just because you don't understand it Doctor doesn't make it bad or sick. There is no real awareness of tantra anyway. I have asked people about it but have never received a satisfactory answer in what tantra is. Spirituality mumbo jumbo. What is it actually? What does it even mean?
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Thanks Meeka. It's true that I don't 'get' BSDM, but I am worldly enough to realize that it appeals to a lot of people. There is no shortage of people here offering their rear ends to your purple strap on each time it is mentioned, nor offers to let you stand on their penis in your stilettos. I get that. Not bad, not sick, just kinky as fuck, and good on you for embracing something that really appeals to you. That's what it's all about. In response to your questions on Tantra, that is exactly the point I am trying to make. Why are there more people practicing BDSM than people who even know what Tantra is? What does that say about sexual perspectives in our society? Is 20 minutes of eye gazing and increasing levels of intimacy that terrifying for us that we would prefer a good flogging? What about sex in modern cinema? It's rare to find a sexy love story, but sexy thrillers with gratituous violence and murder victims are common fare. Are we really that uncomfortable with the notion of positively portrayed sex and sexuality? That's my enquiry. Food for discussion.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I'm going to have a go at explaining Tantra.......please keep in mind I'm at the beginning of this journey, that may be to your advantage or disadvantage! Firstly, Tantra is not a purely sexual thing but a spiritual awakening or journey. It's about being in touch with your higher self, it's about awareness, control, energy transfer and connection, between self, others and universally. Controlled breathing and focus allows someone trained in Tantra to move energy to anywhere within their body, or indeed someone else's, that they wish. From a sexual perspective, Techniques practiced in Tantra allow you to extend orgasm (hours long!), experience multiple orgasms, experience orgasm without ejeculation, experience orgasm/ecstasy with no touch, experience deeper connection with your partner, and others. I've recently had a few experiences that are leading me down this path. 1. I've experienced sex with my lover that I can only describe as "out of body" or spiritual. The connection was such that I was incredibly moved....as was he. (I've not ever believed in the "soul mates" concept and I've never experienced that level of connection previously.( including 23 years of marriage) 2. I've recently felt energy transfer from a complete stranger. I literally grew hot and sweaty from standing within her energy, hands held up and about 1cm apart but not actually touching. She had the same reaction. It was not a hot day, I did not react to anyone else in the group in that way although I certainly felt tingling in my hands when doing the same thing with the Tantra instructor. Imagine, Meeka, being able to intensify and direct energy into your sexual chakra and the experience that would bring.......that is why I'm learning about Tantra. Yes it's slow sex, controlled, connected and deeply moving, but hell I'm at a stage of my life where I've experienced a fair bit of the other kinds and I'm enjoying the journey. I still love variety and BDSM and other forms of play will always be a part of my diet 😉 - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
We are desensitised, everyone is after bigger and better and more outrageous in everything. Kale, Just reminds me of yoga. As for out of body experience with your lover.... You have finally allowed yourself to totally let go. Isn't that it?
-
RHP User
11 years ago
But thanks for the info! So like yoga and breathing techniques you are taught to concentrate your mind on certain parts of the body? To be totally aware & focused on each and every part of your body and your surroundings? Visualise the breath flowing through you body? Something like that?
-
him_and_me
11 years ago
Thanks to you for that explanation. It sounds like an incredible exploration and journey you're on. Was it you some weeks ago that said you've got a spot on a tantra workshop? As for the original question... I don't know a lot about either 'world' but I do feel like there has been a shift in representations of sex in society generally (films, advertising, porn, music, fashion) that has made it more 'ok' to be more violent, more shocking, more in-your-face. Boundaries get pushed all the time - years ago it was scandalous for a woman to reveal her ankles in polite society - but where does it take us in the long run? I am not suggesting that people shouldn't be able to practice any kind of consentual sex they like, just that there is more of the BDSM type imagery around in mainstream society today and perhaps that is why more people are interested in it. And perhaps it is also because, to the uninitiated, visually it is more interesting to look at than people making eye contact with each other or standing close together. If I had to choose one over the other... I'd probably go for Tantra. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
It's not that I've just let go. Letting go isn't a problem with this man 😊 This is a totally different experience. I'm not even really able to adequately articulate what it is. Yes, There are some basic similarities with yoga - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Hi meeka I have experienced tantric sex with a couple of partners..... Both very different in technique and style but the energy is similar. It's a combination of breath, focus, touch and relaxation. One of them was incredibly oral, the other was all body touch but also (after a number of visits) sometimes able to make me come without any genital stimulation at all. Tantric lovers are generous and caring and seemingly get more pleasure giving than receiving. Neither of them were soulmates or involved although the latter is one I truly call a friend now. My profile is closed as I am in relationship now.....I think I can still accept messages if any one wants more information.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
however, isn't bdsm at the fundamental level, all about control? Tantra is the exact opposite. the answer is simple, the control freaks outnumber the hippies in this world Mr S
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Whoareu10... No we cannot send you messages when your profile is blocked... 😢😢 How do I know this... 😎 😉😘 Hp xo 💌 Because you're worth it...
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Opened high..... For a day or so....... Haven't time to be polite ......and don't have a sexatary to reply to messages....for those that can't read. Note: I have lots of friends but don't accept friend requests even from people I HAVE been intimate with. That's for Facebook or linked in
-
twowithnolimits
11 years ago
Re "sometimes able to make me come without any genital stimulation at all. ".. we are a D/s couple and nadi can come multiple times at anytime on command without any preparation...............
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Please do tell, how was this accomplished, and what attracted you to BDSM in the first instance?
-
RHP User
11 years ago
prolonged sensual touching, intimate and intense energy exchange are used in BDSM. Does Tantra incorporate BDSM?
Boards
-
Hot Topics
Topics: 14361 Comments: 120840
-
Girls Ask
Topics: 1355 Comments: 14709
-
Guys Ask
Topics: 2425 Comments: 17234
-
Couples' Corner
Topics: 2405 Comments: 12737
-
Swingers Lifestyle
Topics: 794 Comments: 5154
-
Fetish & Fantasy
Topics: 1148 Comments: 6957
-
Hot Travel
Topics: 622 Comments: 2145
-
LGBT
Topics: 156 Comments: 1150
Forum help
-
Something related with that
-
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
-
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
-
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
-
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
Share