F47
Tale as old as time....
September 28 2013
Comments
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On_Safari
11 years ago
....and it did "fuck the friendships" on more than one encounter, so no I grew out of shagging my mates a looooooong time ago!! Find developing friendships after "shag-status" works better for me. IF ANYONE can explain WHY your mates go all "weird" on you after sex "complicates" things for THEM and you suddenly enter the generic "girl pool" for yhem and why I'm equally keen to know. Pours a glass of wine and pulls up a bean bag at Dragon's feet.....Indy, girl on a mission.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Maybe men are programmed to run after bonking, and I honestly think a lot of men just don't believe that a woman can separate love and sex... Hence the wariness they display. But agree, if you meet and get the bonking out of the way then a good friendship can often develop.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Dear the roughly 3,500,000,000 other men on the planet, God has issued a recall on us and we must return to our maker due to programming faults. Now Meeka, please accept this apology on behalf of all men on this planet, I'm sure they agree with me as they all think like me and I believe I can speak for them all ;) Also to the individual women who run after sex and also CAN separate love from sex, please join the cue to be reprogrammed as you may have a hard drive that is infected with the M.A.N virus. Love, Gavin.. xoxo
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RHP User
11 years ago
To have sex with your friend. Get that out of the way, move on and build the actual friendship closer than before! How do I know this? Been there done that and on more than one occasion ! Yes it takes time, effort and determination to go this but if they were good enough to be friends first, good enough to fuck, surely they are good enough to go the distance? Unless... Having sex together somehow makes them morph into totally different creatures than the ones we got to know in the first instance - Posted from rhpmobile
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Cheekyarses
11 years ago
If it isn't broken - don't fix it!!
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sweetgem
11 years ago
So far, I have not yet bonked my real friends whom I met in the real world, but have had sexual intimacy with some men I met online, whom I thought could be a potential lover, but hell I learned my lessons!!! I am not those men, so I don't know what were their true reasons for changing from being a gentleman to devil out of the blue! But I guess those men had only one purpose in meeting me, i.e. pretended to be my friends and once they got what they sought from me, they disappeared! So in my opinion, don't start something you cannot maintain later on! There's plenty of fish in the ocean Lucky :-)- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Lame reason not to Fuck.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have shagged all my close friends and they are all still my friends. As I see it, its not the shag that is the problem it is falling in love and many people equate the two as one. Oh simplistic I know so lets put it this way.Boy meets girl. Boy and girl have lots of fun as friends, they met every now and then. One is in love the other is not. Drunken night, foolish night, lucky night puts them in rapturous intimacy. The one in love thinking that sex is only given to a lover has consummated and confirmed the notion that the other must love them. (oh the joy of love reciprocated). The other thinking, that was ok, maybe another time when no one else is available.So the love struck one fills out the duty of a lover and becomes clingy, devoted, needy. While in the past it was friendship (secretly in love) now its ok to express love. (Hopefully we all know what love is like. Minuets apart seem like hours.)Thus the love struck one changes the tone of communication, the rate of communication. In the past it was only on weekends, maybe months. "What you up to, want to go out with the mates?" now it is "Thinking of you, can I come over?" every bloody night.The enviable rejection will break the bond of friendship. Even tho the friend side likes hanging out with the other, the difficulty of saying NO all the time will turn friendship into awkward encounters. Not much fun in that at all. So goodbye. How sad.So if you enjoy the company of your friend and end up alone together and lust rages. Stop for a moment and think. If you are in love proclaim it before, if not in love announce it as well. It is not the fault of either, it is the fault of both and the inability to really communicate. And yes many men are terrible communicators, but allot of women are too.So if you are both friends and there is no hidden love then shag away. If you are both in love, well then shag away. BUT if one is and one is not and that is unknown. DON'T fuck.Just my view, what would I know.. Why can't people communicate. Your supposed to be adults for fuck sake, grow up.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I thought you "loved" all the people you sleep with? You are one scary dude I reckon.
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RHP User
11 years ago
great post and so true...there is a huge difference between loving someone and being in love....of course we love our friends, but the danger to us and them as you say is when one is in love and the other is not x laB
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RHP User
11 years ago
makes a big difference. Blindman is right - you have to ask whether the friend or you have more than friendship in mind. You have said you are both attracted to each other so is it a friendship masquerading as an unspoken relationship for one or both of you or is it a friendship that could accommodate another level. In the club scene, I shag around with friends and it makes no difference because everyone seems to know the score. But for a one-on-one meet I have often said choose between conversation or sex because of attachment issues when the two mix. (I always recommend the conversation - I am far better at it than anything else)
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RHP User
11 years ago
I think it's men that often get this confused. Love and being in love. A lot of women are very warm and caring people. We may even love our friends. It's men who get this confused and can not make the distinction between the two. They panic and start to pull away under the false assumption that to want him is to fall instantly in love with him. Lol. 😋
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RHP User
11 years ago
I think saying why don't people communicate is bollocks really. Sex can often change things, regardless of your best intentions. You can not foresee everything, you can not know how you will feel or react. Sometimes the most unexpected happens. Yes, okay for some people sex seems to be something you just do, just another activity you do with all your friends... But not everyone is like that. Sometimes sex actually means something.
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RHP User
11 years ago
there was actually some good advice contained within your post, until the last line anyway when you resorted to condescension as you often do ;-) How do you know what communication has or hasn't taken place? And really, I think you can talk about something until you're blue in the face, and swear up and down that things won't change; it's not until the deed is done that you know what feelings it will stir up.But, you summed up the main issue with these interactions. In MANY cases (note I didn't say all cases before someone jumps on me), someone ends up wanting more than the other. I don't agree, however, that it only happens if one of the parties was 'in love' before sex happened (which is not an issue in this particular case). I think it can still happen anyway, even if it's just a function of one party confusing the sex with love. And in the case when you were already friends beforehand, that is even more likely because there is already a base of mutual respect, shared connection, and shared experiences, even if it's been purely friendship on all levels up until then.Indi - I tend to agree. I've had better luck with friendships developing after the shagging has already taken place. I think in my case that may also be a function of some of my insecurities though.... (yes I have some insecurities OMG!!! And I'm admitting that on the RHP forums!!! I'm not the perfect, self-accepting, totally balanced, perfectly unbiased creature I'm supposed to be to post on here!! ).
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RHP User
11 years ago
Now, lets say that men may be confused, hardly surprising seeing ALL women are indecisive and their emotions change within the flap of a hummingbirds wing. Whoops, did I make a stereotype? How dare I generalise a group of people based on their gender? And to all my gay brothers out there, I feel for you boys as it must be a pretty sad world where none of you can differentiate between love and being in love.....
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RHP User
11 years ago
I honestly think it only will affect things as much as you let it. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Got your knickers in a twist Gavin? My comment is that a man can confuse what the woman is feeling ... They think she is involved or falling for him and in any case they are too wary to risk it. But true I am generalizing, not all men are like that of course. But there are lots that are. If that pisses you off. Well tough titties really. 😎
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RHP User
11 years ago
(yes I have some insecurities OMG!!! And I'm admitting that on the RHP forums!!! I'm not the perfect, self-accepting, totally balanced, perfectly unbiased creature I'm supposed to be to post on here!! ). Membership is only open to people who are honest with themselves and who are prepared to acknowledge their perfect imperfections. You are incognito no more!
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RHP User
11 years ago
The fact there are men (and women) out there with no sense of ethics or moral integrity, yes, that does piss me off. Because in 2013 to have narrow minded people make chauvinistic statements is ridiculous and childish. Maybe you should pay more attention to how you word your comments Meeka as you contradicted yourself....
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madotara69
11 years ago
I think that when a lady is building up to and during an orgasm, she for a moment is in love. She can quickly recover from the emotion and gather her self with a proper composure. And move on with attending all the other tasks at hand.I think a man witnessing a woman during a true orgasm sees the love within it for a much longer time.It is communication differences with no words to explain the emotion. It is difficult to experience the woman's orgasm without feeling there is love.And a woman can't see quite what she is projecting when she cums, she can't see what the man sees.I could imagine that is what could become between a friendship.Mado, Tara xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
I maybe I didn't write it clearly but I always meant the same thing. In a causal sex thing with friends, as per the question and scenario we have been given, men often seem to think that women are falling for them or don't want to risk hanging around too long because I personally feel that lots of men don't believe women can have an ongoing sex thing with out their emotions become involved. Probably due to past experiences. And yes, I personally think that Men confuse women's love for ring in love. Never contradicted myself that was always what I meant.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Ring should read being
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'GavinMcSparkles' Now, lets say that men may be confused, hardly surprising seeing ALL women are indecisive and their emotions change within the flap of a hummingbirds wing. Whoops, did I make a stereotype? How dare I generalise a group of people based on their gender? And to all my gay brothers out there, I feel for you boys as it must be a pretty sad world where none of you can differentiate between love and being in love..... Sorry Gavin...you seem to have a bee in your bonnet. Are you referring to my posts? Because I really don't see where I was stereotyping or generalising based on gender? I didn't mention a particular gender as being more or less prone to anything....whether that's more likely to confuse love and sex, or more likely to confuse love and being in love, or more likely to run away after sex, or whatever other endless complexities - both real and imaginary - we can run into in this crazy world .If you're referring to what Meeka has said...well, I think you're reading too much into it to be honest (and isn't that just typical of a man!! ).
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' I maybe I didn't write it clearly but I always meant the same thing. In a causal sex thing with friends, as per the question and scenario we have been given, men often seem to think that women are falling for them or don't want to risk hanging around too long because I personally feel that lots of men don't believe women can have an ongoing sex thing with out their emotions become involved. Probably due to past experiences. And yes, I personally think that Men confuse women's love for ring in love. Never contradicted myself that was always what I meant. I would agree with this.
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RHP User
11 years ago
The point is, there is a difference between a man, and men. You mentioned MEN doing whatever then went back on it saying A MAN. In the first instance you're implying all men have this behaviour, but then when called out on it you change your mind. I don't disagree that SOME men do what you are saying but don't throw everyone in the same boat. Just like I won't throw all women in the same boat in regards to my friend who has possibly ruined our friendship by not communicating her emotions with me. Yep, I was confused as hell when she was telling me one thing and meaning another because she developed feelings and didn't want to look stupid.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Gayely' makes a big difference. Blindman is right - you have to ask whether the friend or you have more than friendship in mind. You have said you are both attracted to each other so is it a friendship masquerading as an unspoken relationship for one or both of you or is it a friendship that could accommodate another level. In the club scene, I shag around with friends and it makes no difference because everyone seems to know the score. But for a one-on-one meet I have often said choose between conversation or sex because of attachment issues when the two mix. (I always recommend the conversation - I am far better at it than anything else) is definitely something to think about...thanks Gayely
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'WildSong' (yes I have some insecurities OMG!!! And I'm admitting that on the RHP forums!!! I'm not the perfect, self-accepting, totally balanced, perfectly unbiased creature I'm supposed to be to post on here!! ). Membership is only open to people who are honest with themselves and who are prepared to acknowledge their perfect imperfections. You are incognito no more! Woohoo!!!
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RHP User
11 years ago
I can see your point about not being in love beforehand and still it makes a difference. Sometimes it is far more complex than that. I can see now it was an oversimplification. But there are pointers I think because I can work out beforehand for a close friend if it is going to be a problem for either them or I in terms of emotions running wild. I don't really care about anyone reading me wrong and staying clear but am mainly concerned with actually hurting or being hurt. The wildcards are those I don't know so well. For a friend, I probably look at how free they are with their sexuality. If they are very free then it probably won't mean anything other than a nice time. If they are the type that doesn't play a lot then it might mean more to them than to you.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Oh poor Meeka. The forums judge, jury and executioner. Well not that good at the execution, rather messy really. Or the partiality of the jury, you are a little one eyed, and as the judge, well... don't you need the authority to be one. But that's ok I do love you. Those lovely curves mmmmmm oh and your as crazy as a loon, that's so sexy in my eyes. double mmmmA word of advice dear Meeka. You are not a man, you can not from your limited experience make a call on all men. I am not sure if you noticed but I rarely genderize my posts. I do so with great care as I hate the inequality of stereo types. This is the last time I will ask, but why do you hate men so much? We are human like you, equal in emotions and soul, frail delicate human beings. Stop making us monsters your words are close to criminal.A good judge does not use the actions of one, or two, or even a dozen to condemn all.So I do hope you stop hating as carrying a frown too long will leave the corners of you mouth down turned. Do try to avoid cynical old age dear. It can be be very lonely if you do not know how to forgive. Forgiveness is such a powerful tool to have, not only does it heal others, but it heals your own soul, the only one you have. Take care of it please.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'laBoheme2'great post and so true...there is a huge difference between loving someone and being in love....of course we love our friends, but the danger to us and them as you say is when one is in love and the other is not x laB Yes we are hamstrung all with the word, the great umbrella word that covers so much. Love oh poor poor love, from the warmth of the morning sun to the tragic ending of Romeo and Juliet. Is it degrees of love? Is it selfish or selfless? oh love is such a sad word as it carries so much burden.Love you dear wife, and do like the gender change, you are turning me on. Would have thought leBoheme2 more appropriate a name on the hand of your husband l'aveugle.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Luckdragon23' there was actually some good advice contained within your post, until the last line anyway when you resorted to condescension as you often do ;-) How do you know what communication has or hasn't taken place? And really, I think you can talk about something until you're blue in the face, and swear up and down that things won't change; it's not until the deed is done that you know what feelings it will stir up.But, you summed up the main issue with these interactions. In MANY cases (note I didn't say all cases before someone jumps on me), someone ends up wanting more than the other. I don't agree, however, that it only happens if one of the parties was 'in love' before sex happened (which is not an issue in this particular case). I think it can still happen anyway, even if it's just a function of one party confusing the sex with love. And in the case when you were already friends beforehand, that is even more likely because there is already a base of mutual respect, shared connection, and shared experiences, even if it's been purely friendship on all levels up until then.Indi - I tend to agree. I've had better luck with friendships developing after the shagging has already taken place. I think in my case that may also be a function of some of my insecurities though.... (yes I have some insecurities OMG!!! And I'm admitting that on the RHP forums!!! I'm not the perfect, self-accepting, totally balanced, perfectly unbiased creature I'm supposed to be to post on here!! ). The last line I thought was a cleverly miss directed shot to blow my own horn, a shot in the air. Perfection is but the impossible dream, yet there is no harm living in a dream world, look at Meeka, I think I might have hit her flying above as I took that random shot in the air, her dream may need a pinch.In my dreams i am a very bad boy, and sorry lovely young dragon girl if I use you for my own ends. Feel free to return the favor any time. xThat post was but one example, I think a common one. All lovers are friends, it must be so. Why friendship breaks is an endless lament of us all., But dont worry if friendship is lost for there are 7 billion more options for you to explore. Its the ones you hate that make life a chore. guess what you end up fucking them as well.
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RHP User
11 years ago
And who said men don't get their periods! Oops or do I mean man? FFS! Blindman I am speaking from a woman's perspective. I think I am allowed to do that no?
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RHP User
11 years ago
No, I wasn't referring to your posts or comments at all. And yes, I do have a bee in my bonnet about sexist attitudes, especially if they are referring to me and the person making the claim knows nothing about me. It just seems that its ok to generalise men but don't dare do it to women. Seems also a lot of double standards in society these days. Granted, women were oppressed since the dawn of time, but don't put down those who want to stand beside you as an equal human animal. And Meeka, to say men also have periods, I guess it's something to be ashamed of? I'm physically incapable of menstruating so I'm not going to assume what the experience is like.....
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RHP User
11 years ago
What is sad is that I believe it is better to start as friends and build from there if you want a "More than a FWB" relationship.I have a friend. Lets call her Lady S.Lady S is awesome. Funny, Intelligent, independent, strong willed, hard worker etc etc (see my list on the "What men want" thread)So I am making very very good friends with Lady S and she seems interested in return... "seems" being the operative word.Then she goes a little cold and distant so I back off (men have it hard today with AVO's and sexual harassment etc etc... please consider that before launching into the "you should have chased" spiel).Now Lady S is pissed with me for not chasing because my interests have wandered elsewhere (sort of).So... where is the manual?How the hell are we Mere Simple Males supposed to guess when to move and when to not?(Feel free to substitute the MSM with the female equivalent)Since separating from my ex-wife this is the first lady I've truly come to like in a way of wanting more than a FB/FWB relationship with and now I'm left feeling a little hollow and sad.The above probably doesn't help you OP but at least it shows that the confusion comes from both directions no matter how surefooted the chaser and/or chase'e may feel.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'I_N_D_A_G_I_N_E' ....and it did "fuck the friendships" on more than one encounter, so no I grew out of shagging my mates a looooooong time ago!! Find developing friendships after "shag-status" works better for me. IF ANYONE can explain WHY your mates go all "weird" on you after sex "complicates" things for THEM and you suddenly enter the generic "girl pool" for yhem and why I'm equally keen to know. Pours a glass of wine and pulls up a bean bag at Dragon's feet.....Indy, girl on a mission. Can I say lacking in the strength of personality and self assurance or is that too harsh?I have boinked friends, some very close friends, some are still friends and some faded into obscurity. As long as it is understood that it is just harmless sex for shits and giggles or to relieve frustration on both persons behalf then it should all work out fine.However... like a few others have said, if the person (male OR female) are scared that either party can't keep it light (i.e. just "making love" not "being in love") then only fear and fleeing comes after the climax.One would also think that there is that "what did they really think" factor which could cause tension if the person is not self assured enough to feel comfortable with their performance.Additional... and I'd hate to think this of anyone in any situation but maybe they didn't like the experience and just couldn't face up to how they felt in the end.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have had this work for me once, primarily because in bed we just did not hit it off, dare I say my round peg in her square hole ! We both just shrugged it off and carried on the friendship, about 4yrs now.The second was a disaster though 180 degrees, the sex was pretty damn good hence the problem, she wanted more, not so much of a problem but it was within a few days, then came the avalanche of questions, then came the vitriol. BOOM friendship over.Only you know the situation and your feelings, do you want more than a screw ? Talk to the man.And good luck.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'Blindman I am speaking from a woman's perspective. I think I am allowed to do that no?Yes you are. But whats with all the bigotry.Would be fun to do the "Meeka's list of insults to men." thread. would be a long long listQuoting you Meeka from only this thread:"I think it's men that often get this confused. Love and being in love.""And yes, I personally think that Men confuse women's love for ring in love. " "I personally feel that lots of men don't believe women can have an ongoing sex thing with out their emotions become involved. " "My comment is that a man can confuse what the woman is feeling ... They think she is involved or falling for him and in any case they are too wary to risk it. ""I honestly think a lot of men just don't believe that a woman can separate love and sex... "So you say you have the right to speak for women. But then where do you get the right to write such presumptuous and bigoted anti male hate? Assumptions that you know what it is like to be male? You are worse then any misogynistic male I have ever had the displeasure to encounter.We are people we are not sexes. Men you will find are very much the same as women in how they think and deal with life Till you understand that people like you make true equality impossible. Stop being a bigot. You can not class peoples via their sex., You are deliberately spreading hate, re enforcing negative stereo types, and looking like a bitter aging cynic. On last quote from Meeka"I thought you "loved" all the people you sleep with? You are one scary dude I reckon."I do and that is where you can not understand what is going on can you. I communicate.Meeka, I am one to never personalize a debate unless that debate is first taken to that level by another in a direct and unambiguous personal insult. You did and it was out of the blue, defaming and consciously vilifying (is it because I am male?). If you wish to debate please learn how to and really, Meeka... "Grow the F Up"Meeka do not take me as a fool. I see the dark core that drives your hate. If you wish to continue to insult me I will put a stop to it. Your ongoing attack on me stops now, please.
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RHP User
11 years ago
There is a kernel of truth when the generalisation is made that women can't separate sex from deeper feelings. Like all generalisations, it starts somewhere. A lot of women can't separate the two, but a lot can. Depends which woman you are with
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madotara69
11 years ago
snap! kernel if soguess it could be said that the average of the two could be classed as cuntstable. he heMado
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RHP User
11 years ago
evidence to suggest that when a woman has an orgasm with a man the chemical rush is the cause of her feeling bonded....a rush to the brain....but it doesn't ,always happen,it depends on the man of course
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RHP User
11 years ago
Yes it's a generalization. But lots of my everyday vanilla friends will say that if they have sex with a guy for awhile they do become involved and they start to have feelings. In fact I think a lot of my girlfriends see me as a outside the norm. That is I can have a FWB without "falling in love". I say to them you can have feelings and love a man, it's your expectations of where it's supposed to lead which is the problem. Of course that links into the generalization I made about men confusing a woman who cares for them or loves them as a friend with thinking she is falling for them. Probably based on their past histories lots don't seem to hang around to distinguish the two. I reckon there are lots of guys who deep down don't believe that women can have a sexual relationship with someone without being attached or wanting more.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I can see you have referenced me in your headings but just to let you know I don't read your comments. So I don't know if you are writing those essays for me but thought I would save you some time. :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Point is it's very often true. Not always, but often. Depends on a whole lot of things but particularly communication from both parties. Sometimes I feel a little behind the eight ball not being psychic with this issue.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Well Justforfun, I am sure I will be shot down for generalizing, BUT I think men and women view intimacy differently. Women view the cuddling, the kissing, sharing of secrets, any romantic gestures as deepening feelings and that things are getting serious. Regardless that the guy is still saying they want casual. Men see growing intimacy as another aspect of sex I think?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Often a man's actions don't match his words as women perceive it. Why is he saying he only wants casual when he wants to cuddle all night, when he is sharing his inner self, etc etc. Well until you get burned and realize that you have to listen to the man's words and disregard his actions. That is my experience anyway.
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RHP User
11 years ago
In aggregate mine have been that many women send very contradictory signals and communications. Not enough plain speech a lot of the time I reckon.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'justforfunisall' In aggregate mine have been that many women send very contradictory signals and communications. Not enough plain speech a lot of the time I reckon. Nope...I think sometimes women still don't "hear" what men are saying regardless of how blunt you say it. You just have to listen to young women or a group of women discussing men. They analysis what a guy REALLY means when he says X, Y or Z. In what way are women contradictory?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Ever hear a woman say "fine" and mean anything but...Or the old "but you were supposed to chase me" chestnut? If you seriously don't think quite a few women like playing head games and that women have cornered the market on clear communication, then what's the point?Honestly? Forget the analysis...if a man says "let's keep it casual". He very likely means.."let's keep it casual".....no analysis required.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Yes I agree, but sometimes I sit with my single friends and spend time discussing is there a hidden message behind why he waited three hours to answer a text message. What does this mean? Blah blah. I listen to young women on the bus discussing things along the same lines. It is hard for us to get around the fact that men are so ............. simple.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Usually if I don't answer a text message it's because I am asleep (the shift work) or I messed my phone settings up or I am tied up at a job at work and can't spare even 5 seconds to text back because of the nature of the job. If I say "I'm tired" it just means I'm tired, same for hungry, horny, angry or just about anything else. Plain speech from both parties, where what they say is what they mean would probably prevent a lot of misunderstandings.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Oh I gave up talking about men like that in my 20's....... I prefer to to talk about sex now. But I still actually have friends, okay younger than me, but that still discuss things like that. About the texting!!! Bores me stupid.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Things to discuss.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'It is hard for us to get around the fact that men are so ............. simple. A lesson more women should learn... My friend is always complaining his wife doesn't understand him because she is always looking for the hidden meaning.He says "I'm hungry", give him a sandwich.He says "I'm bored", put the V8's on.He says "I'm horny", bonk him.See... we are simple mere males
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madotara69
11 years ago
Just a thought. If you are friends with merit, then not just about sex, but any conversation that does not become awkward is a good sign for getting things out into the open and intentions well understood. If it does become awkward then the friendship needs to be worked on with a clear understanding.Iether way, the friendship should not become Misunderstood.Mado
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'I can see you have referenced me in your headings but just to let you know I don't read your comments. So I don't know if you are writing those essays for me but thought I would save you some time. :)That's ok I am sure you would not have liked what I said, so lucky you are able to ignore. LOLBut then you went a spoilt it all by saying"It is hard for us to get around the fact that men are so ............. simple. "Maybe Meeka you are way too bright and are picking the wrong men. Batting out side you league maybe. Lucky I am BI and that gives me much more insight then the hetro that ends up blaming the opposite sex.
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RHP User
11 years ago
We may indeed be a complex organism on a biological scale, but our lives aren't complex. They are MADE complex. Usually by people who are bored with their life or need to give it more meaning. Just have to look at Facebook for proof! In regards to the forum topic, I was very close friends with a woman. We knew we couldn't have a romantic relationship (proven now) but we thought if we ever were to have sex, it would be just sex. This was the AGREED understanding.....but when it did happen she began to get very clingy and even jealous when I mentioned another woman. This wasn't the agreement. She over complicated the situation to the point of Home and away type drama. Now, I really don't see her the same as I did. Simplicity over complexity, I'll take the simple any day.
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RHP User
11 years ago
sometimes men say one thing and women hear something else....and she probably already had an attraction to you....when it comes to sex,there is no predictor of how it can change things between friends...no matter what is said initially,there is no contract for the heart.
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