inspirit

inspirit

F50

That word!!!! "EXCLUSIVE"

May 08 2013

What does it mean to you when someone is in an exclusive relationship? Does "exclusive" mean you are "committed" then what is it you are committing to....Does it mean you are committed to each other and only have sex with each other? Does it mean you are committed to each other and have sex with others? So exclusive really means to you??Me... The only way I would be exclusive would be if my "friend" fulfilled all my sexual desires including fantasies. Though that would mean he would have to be very special and be comfortable with the free spirit that I am. Therefore being comfortable with playing with others has to be included.

Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    ..... RUN!!!!!!!!!

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Why is being exclusive important? I get that when you adore someone you don't want anyone else... But playing with others is a different kind of fun.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Exclusive is an interesting concept.   I've just recently entered into an "exclusive" relationship....for the first time in about 5 years. To me, it does mean i'm committed, committed to exploring a future together.   It doesn't mean i'll never have sex with another person, only that we will discuss play options together, that he has the right to be considered in my decisions, that i will give him absolute honesty and that he is my first priority.   His view is that he wants me to be happy and fulfilled in every way .....and if he can't facilitate that he won't stand in my way.   It's kinda refreshing to have that sexual honesty with someone who you really care about.

  • inspirit

    inspirit

    12 years ago

    This an off shoot to Karyn's topic on "Expectations" .....

  • Paradisepair

    Paradisepair

    12 years ago

    That's what I'm hearing in the term

  • jensta

    jensta

    12 years ago

    Wanting only each other is Exclusive ...

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I've always taken exclusive to mean monogamous.....only sexy time with each other.....goodbye playmates (sigh), hello the same person, all the time, only them, always, every day, and the day after that, still them.....nup not for me at the moment. karynb - I have a very similar arrangement and it works perfectly for us.....I wish you the same happiness & success with it <3

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    you can take the condom off

  • sweetgem

    sweetgem

    12 years ago

    Quoting 'karynb' Exclusive is an interesting concept.   I've just recently entered into an "exclusive" relationship....for the first time in about 5 years.d To me, it does mean i'm committed, committed to exploring a future together.   It doesn't mean i'll never have sex with another person, only that we will discuss play options together, that he has the right to be considered in my decisions, that i will give him absolute honesty and that he is my first priority.   His view is that he wants me to be happy and fulfilled in every way .....and if he can't facilitate that he won't stand in my way.   It's kinda refreshing to have that sexual honesty with someone who you really care about. I partially agree with karynb's defining of the word. But I admit that I cannot be as open minded as you are karynb, and admire your strength for being able to be so open minded To me, EXCLUSIVE means I am committed to him and him to me emotionally, mentally, physically and morally. But we must not be clingy or stick with each other 24/7 and 365 a year, and must give each other some personal space to breath and have some "me time" and "he time" from time to time! However, I cannot accept my partner to go out and sleep with other women freely in his "me time"! Call me old fashion, but I just can't be as open minded to that extend because I would not do that to him. That's why I am on RHP now to explore and fulfill my fantasies while I am still single, and I always like men who are 5-10 years older than me, because he would have had experiences and fulfilled most of his fantasies, if not all lol, by the time he meets me and enters into an exclusive relationship with me. Of course, if he develops new fantasy and wants me to explore with it him, I would be happy to swing along provided that we both discuss and make it clear to each other the purpose of wandering into the wildness prior to commencing the journey. And the rest is up to fate whether our relationship would break or bonds stronger.Well, these are just my thoughts anyway and I only speak for myself! Therefore, please nobody gets offended if they read my comment as I am not enforcing my thoughts onto anyone at all!

  • sweetgem

    sweetgem

    12 years ago

    Quoting 'tuscanred' you can take the condom off Love your definition LMAO

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I would love to hear the words exclusive from a 90 year old billionaire woman ........ Actually I'm not a prude a 90 year old man is cool as well yep would definitely run toward them if they wanted to be exclusive apart from that its not my cup of tea at this point of time in my life

  • Cheekyarses

    Cheekyarses

    12 years ago

    Exclusive isn't really a word that is mentioned much on a swingers site! To me 'exclusive' is the selected few... No one else, just them!

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I think exclusive means excluding all others, and committed a relationship means one that is based on absolute trust. So being exclusive equals monogamous in my book, but being in a committed relationship would not have to exclude swinging at all. 3 cts.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    and a committed relationship*

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    RUN!!!!!!!!

  • jensta

    jensta

    12 years ago

    Quoting 'tuscanred' you can take the condom off Absolutely No need for Condom ... And don't it feel good What a great reason to be Exclusive in a relationship Safe Sex is Important so unless Exclusive ... Keep using those Condoms

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I guess exclusive can be all encompassing or dismantled into its parts.For me, I'm emotionally exclusive with Mr IAT - we love nobody else and our commitment to our family is strong.But we're not exclusive sexually - though we play as a couple.I don't believe in sexual monogamy biologically; rather, I believe that is a choice we are all 'free' to make.. How we deal with that is a matter for personal discretion.So I guess I'm not convinced that 'exclusive' has to be all or nothing

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    by definition means to 'exclude', so to me it would mean excluding anyone else from the relationship, the antithesis of 'open', therefore monogomous. Committed is a whole different concept. You can have a committed open or monogomous relationship.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Means my awesome life would change...RUN FOREST RUN!! Foxy

  • inspirit

    inspirit

    12 years ago

    My relationship would be an exclusive commitment. Meaning my commitment to one is exclusive though we do play together. Make sense ? lol

  • Paradisepair

    Paradisepair

    12 years ago

    That you can't use the label if you're only talking about emotional exclusivity, you're either exclusive 100% across the various areas of commitment or not.

  • On_Safari

    On_Safari

    12 years ago

    I just said that our time is nearing it's end date so please forgive me for simply wanting to enjoy the arse off you before I must give you up.  If that's ok with you.  Just don't go interviewing my replacement until I'm gone.  You know, atleast allow my corpse to cool a little. 😏 I think that's fair enough.- Posted from rhpmobile

  • Cassy_74

    Cassy_74

    12 years ago

    To me being exclusive is like almost signing a contract with sub-clauses that has too many deal breaking restrictions................UNLESS you are fortunate to have met someone that can let you have that little bit of freedom or free pass when its needed.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    It doesn't matter how often they see each other, how far along in the commitment they are, or how their spaces' interact, exclusive implies those two people are only seeing each other and only having sex with each other.Looking for people's opinion on this: If I come across a profile and they've put in the seeking section "ages x to y and unattached" does the unattached addendum imply that the person wants an exclusive relationship, or that they're looking for something potentially serious? Everyone's different but what's your thought on the matter

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Just means to me that there are no other sexual partners, usually implemented to minimise the health risks and relax the condom rules. For me it means no emotional commitment or other strings, just one lover.And I'm neither for or against it, whatever works for you at the time.

  • Playmates55

    Playmates55

    12 years ago

    I agree, the sex with other people apart from your life partner is so exciting and "different"

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Quoting 'karynb' Exclusive is an interesting concept.   I've just recently entered into an "exclusive" relationship....for the first time in about 5 years. To me, it does mean i'm committed, committed to exploring a future together.   It doesn't mean i'll never have sex with another person, only that we will discuss play options together, that he has the right to be considered in my decisions, that i will give him absolute honesty and that he is my first priority.   His view is that he wants me to be happy and fulfilled in every way .....and if he can't facilitate that he won't stand in my way.   It's kinda refreshing to have that sexual honesty with someone who you really care about. I think this is "committed". Exclusive by definition is "shutting out all others from a part or share" (taken from dictionary.com"), whereas committed is "to pledge (oneself) to a position on an issue or question; express (one's intention, feeling, etc.)" and "to give in trust or charge; consign."Perhaps people often get the terms confused?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    It sounds like being married without the paperwork!!! Gypsy!- Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I guess our version of "exclusive" could be seen as confusing for sure! And some would see it as leaving the door open, but it suits us right now. Who knows, it might not 6 months down the line, but it's early days yet Quoting 'MyLifeToLive' Quoting 'karynb' Exclusive is an interesting concept.   I've just recently entered into an "exclusive" relationship....for the first time in about 5 years. To me, it does mean i'm committed, committed to exploring a future together.   It doesn't mean i'll never have sex with another person, only that we will discuss play options together, that he has the right to be considered in my decisions, that i will give him absolute honesty and that he is my first priority.   His view is that he wants me to be happy and fulfilled in every way .....and if he can't facilitate that he won't stand in my way.   It's kinda refreshing to have that sexual honesty with someone who you really care about. I think this is "committed". Exclusive by definition is "shutting out all others from a part or share" (taken from dictionary.com"), whereas committed is "to pledge (oneself) to a position on an issue or question; express (one's intention, feeling, etc.)" and "to give in trust or charge; consign." Perhaps people often get the terms confused?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I'm not at all confused. I was married til last year. I did NOT have an exclusive relationship with him, it was, however, committed. This new relationship, is both "exclusive" and Committed...at this point in time. Whilst we are not playing with anyone else right now, we both have certain desires that require participation from other parties. 3 somes, moresomes etc. If we participate in those things its not a traditional "exclusive" relationship. I think you will find many swingers consider themselves "exclusive" outside of the occasional playdate. That's where the term monogamish is used. Quoting 'MyLifeToLive' Quoting 'karynb' Exclusive is an interesting concept.   I've just recently entered into an "exclusive" relationship....for the first time in about 5 years. To me, it does mean i'm committed, committed to exploring a future together.......   I think this is "committed". Exclusive by definition is "shutting out all others from a part or share" (taken from dictionary.com"), whereas committed is "to pledge (oneself) to a position on an issue or question; express (one's intention, feeling, etc.)" and "to give in trust or charge; consign." Perhaps people often get the terms confused?

  • Paradisepair

    Paradisepair

    12 years ago

    Quoting 'karynb' I think you will find many swingers consider themselves "exclusive" outside of the occasional playdate. That's where the term monogamish is used. That's part-time exclusivity though - you either are - in the context of the relationship as a whole or you're not.It's like saying someone's only bi some of the time...