F52
To Porn or not to Porn...
April 12 2017
Comments
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DynamicCouple36
8 years ago
We receive and unsolicited message , we reply and if interested, we ask for a recent FACE photo, and instead get a penis photo!! Lol Makes us think of flashers, and the thrill that they get when exposing themselves to others. At that point in time we ignore and or block - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Was it accompanied by any comment as to 'this is what I like/want to do/into'? Strange regardless, you've made it to getting towards the hot and heavy with a real person, why would you unsolicited throw in strangers? 😯
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RHP User
8 years ago
I'd look at the porn as a way of possibly understanding what the person is into to :) I'd possibly even use it to titilate further if it interested me :) If it wasn't my cup of tea so to speak, I'd let the person know. If they continued sending explicit material after that, then I'd say they're inconsiderate and not worth any more of my time :) Porn is a sign of our times, so the porn itself would not be an issue, neither would the explicitness of it. More of a concern would be the subject matter and whether that was anathema to my values and interests. Again a conversation would ensue to ensure boundaries were established. I don't make any judgements on the porn people watch, if I find it too abhorrent, I'd say so or walk away from where the porn is playing. I did have a playmate who would detail our planned playsession by sending me links to porn (each a hint as to what I could expect). He also expected me to respond be sending links to porn as well (how I would counter or support his suggested material) ... along with explicit instructions to do certain things as I entered his home ... well it was hot :) Mary xx
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RHP User
8 years ago
...you've got the goods and a great profile to explain who/what you are looking for be it short or long term. I often wonder if the folks taking what they assure you are ''originals' even realize that there is a live, living, human and maybe even loving person on the other side of the screen? Sure, this site is about sex but jearzus I could have scored this morning at Woolie's just based on my accent and the time when she got off work? Naaa... the leather in my Saab is flawless and the back seat is where I sleep on long trips. Now then if you want to do a porn shoot, it should be as private as what you whisper in the ear of a lover. I've the cameras and studio gear however you'll never even catch me dead watching the replays of the Superbowl or Miss Universe contest. Every photo you take or film you record has an independent identification code. You rock and I have to roll outta here..... best, CM
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RHP User
8 years ago
I think the timing of it is key. If you throw some porn images or videos in when you are still in the innocent flirting stage it is a bit odd. Otherwise, who isn't into porn or explicit images (good ones that is)?? I support everyone's right to be into what ever they are into but my take on your question is that it is very prudish one.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I'm not easily shocked as I have a broad mind and understand people view porn differently. I don't care about dick pics or clit pics or bondage pics or sex acts in general- each to their own. I would normally send a message back saying that I prefer not to receive them. If they persist then blocked and finished. However, I have received one where the subject matter was not what I would normally expect any adult to enjoy. I even asked a friend to confirm I wasn't being over sensitive. Nope! I wasn't. I didn't show it to all and sundry as once seen you can't unsee. However, the point is that it was unsolicited porn and not agreed to in the first place. If I had an arrangement with someone that included links to porn or whatever, then fine. If my profile indicated I was into explicit then maybe. This was neither. So women - unsolicited porn? and men - why do some feel the need to send it? I'm truly curious. Again - play nice :) KH x
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RHP User
8 years ago
You think asking questions about porn is prudish? All sorts of porn? Look - as I've said I don't care about what people do in the privacy of their own homes, cars, spas etc .... as long as it does not exploit those who cannot stand up for themselves. It's just not my thing is all. I too am entitled to my own views. It doesn't do it for me. It's not prudish - it just doesn't appeal. By the way - do you think underage porn is acceptable? How about bestiality? Or incest? Or rape porn? Personally I find those to be upsetting - not the usual porn with terrible lighting, worse acting and questionable casting. I question anyone who would send those other types of images - which I did. You can choose which genre it happened to be.... This is about respect and ensuring the other party is ok with with receiving an image they have not solicited. If you had started chatting and flirting to someone in real life with an eye to meeting up again, would you flash an explicit image in their face out of the blue and hope they wouldn't be shocked? I'm talking about gentle flirtation and not hot and heavy and where you've basically just met and are getting to know each other.... I'm curious about motivation and what others think if they received it.... not whether I'm being prudish... KH
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RHP User
8 years ago
That's sounds quite judgmental Killerheelz, Who are you to say that all adults would not enjoy it?. What was the subject matter? I am very interested to know that.
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RHP User
8 years ago
This not an aspersion on anybody but my personal opinion that yes I find people that are anti porn can be quite prudish. Nothing wrong with that. It's a way to assess if I am compatible with others.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Is a quick and easy way to express what you are into. I have exchanged porn clips with men and women. My girlfriends will share especially hot clips quite a lot. Particularly if we have shared interested in certain subjects such as BDSM, public humiliation, "forced" sex, male Gay sex etc.
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RHP User
8 years ago
You are absolutely right and any one (or company) producing that stuff should be looking out of a gray bar window a the exercise area in prison. Period, no jokes or subtle suggestions to the contrary. For those that can't or don't want to exist without a video fix, more power to them albeit there are international perpetrates that define ''porn'' from everything from child abuse to indentured slavery. Should you like a more formal opinion, drop me a note. I do hold PhD recognition on a couple of continents in the free world yet exercise them carefully in this format. You rock ....best always, CM
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On_Safari
8 years ago
Is it weird that I like the ones that start as girl on girl, oh and gang bangs. I also like a bit of a story line. I don't like the anal ones, that shit doesn't do it for me.... a finger maybe but not a dick ~ just sayin'
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RHP User
8 years ago
Who is being judgmental now? Did I say I was anti-porn? Nope. Just not my thing. I am into erotic not explicit and like to engage my imagination- I'm an avid reader and have a vivid imagination. I just don't find explicit visual images appealing. That's me but I don't judge others if they enjoy porn. That's them. However, I don't send anything to anyone if I haven't ascertained where their interests lie. No point in sending flowers to someone if they're allergic to pollen. At best they will be upset I had forgotten, at worst they could have an asthma attack! If you and your friends like porn then fine and dandy. Each to their own is my motto. I would hope that others would not judge either you or me for our likes and dislikes. But I bet you sorted that out between you and your friends before any images were exchanged... This post is about respecting other people and ensuring they are expecting the image(s). Not whether they are prudish. It's about boundaries and not overstepping them. I find it interesting this has turned into a discussion about prudishness. KH PS - I'm not going to describe the image. Let's just say as a mother of a young daughter I was shocked to see an extemporaneous image like that from someone. It was not a posed shot. I don't shock easily.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I don't watch porn. I used to collate images on a tumblr site, but haven't for years. The more I saw into the back-end of the industry the less sexy I found it. If someone sent me porn, they don't understand how my mind works, and I'd think they were pretty unimaginative. I'd be so freaking amused if anyone thought me a prude. I'd prefer to write scenes that I'd like to get involved in, and someone would need to be pretty good at sexting to get me going. Pic swapping isn't going to do it for me, either. A person's general banter skills is much more of an aphrodisiac, to me. Otherwise I'll settle on my own imagination, or the hot breath and touch of a lover in my personal vicinity.
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MsJonesy
8 years ago
I would be a little taken aback. There is a long stretch from some chit chat and flirting to having a porn pic land in my message tray. Context is everything. It would also indicate to me the person wasn't particularly interested in much more than an end game of sex, and as my profile makes abundantly clear, my end game is something a little more than that. Porn has its place, but I rarely (never is probably closer to the mark) use it as part of a build up to a meet. With an established friendship it has other uses....but once again rare. That has nothing to do with being prudish (and that word could never be used to describe either of the lovely Hotwives!), but everything to do with personal interests and what turns me on, so I'm parking my bag next to PepperRose. She described it perfectly.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I wouldn't appreciate it if someone I'd only just begun communicating with sent me porn. I like some porn and watch and share it with people, but only once I know them quite well and we've established our sexual likes and preferences. Actually, before I've met someone I barely even engage in any flirting with them, as I really don't know whether I'll be into someone until I meet them in the flesh.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Acually after reading your hints about what was sent that would be a hell no. I have friends who move from say RHP to something like Kik for that ease of messaging. If they get sent a dick pic without being asked - they automatically block the guy. To me its like having a flyer shoved in your face when you're walking through the mall as opposed to being asked if I would like it first. If I get a dick pic without being asked the first time, I usually ask what made them decide this was the point in time to show me their cock? In the rare event I've been sent random porn without a friendship, established rapport etc they get a WTAF and a bye Felipe. I'm with Pepper and MsJonesy on this one.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I have to say I am with Pepper , Ms Jonsey and Softy if it's not requested , don't send. I don't believe people who don't want to receive it are prudes either. I personally prefer the real deal instead of a picture. I personally believe that anything like child pornography are crime scene photos as they can't consent! Because of some work I have done I can tell people it is actually a crime to distribute that style of porn which holds a jail sentence usually of 2+ years and a honoured membership on the child protection register. Which means if you are into uniforms there will be a lot hanging around your house. The other consequence is that the person then would normally have to do sex offender counselling.....and lots of other fallout anyhow just saying....... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
I like your selection
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RHP User
8 years ago
Some experiment once watching porn they otherwise don't famcy
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RHP User
8 years ago
A finger or dick it's still anal, some are into it some are not, some even become obsessed once experienced
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RHP User
8 years ago
but what is an 'extemporaneous' image, what was the image? Why not just say what it was. Because you have children? Comments are now being posted about child pornography, and I seriously doubt that is what was sent to you? My opinion, I think it does sound a bit prudish, had you owned/disclosed, the image in question you were referring to, you're asking a question but not willing to say what the image was, my opinion might have been different. I like people to be straight up, honest, no need to be playing a guessing game, seems like a mountain out of a molehill thing to me. Easy fixed, tell us what was in the picture, or we can carry on with the game of charades 😀 I think you have a responsibility here to make sure the child pornography thing doesn't gather it's own momentum, purely because because of your vague op. You need to clarify IMO
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RHP User
8 years ago
And your subsequent posts have shed some light on the content of the pornnclip ... that may have been better included when you established the context of your original post, Killer .... I think people have responded according to their views and values on porn and as I clearly stated, subject matter is the key concern for me ... Jonesy, the gentleman I was seeing and playing with was a dominant and it was part of the dynamics of our play :) sex was always the end result lol 😂 and the clips were clearly a degree of foreplay :) He knew me well enough to know what I liked, how and I liked it and delivered ... very delicious :) Mary xx
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'Hotwives_Inc' And your subsequent posts have shed some light on the content of the pornnclip ... that may have been better included when you established the context of your original post, Killer .... I think people have responded according to their views and values on porn and as I clearly stated, subject matter is the key concern for me ... Jonesy, the gentleman I was seeing and playing with was a dominant and it was part of the dynamics of our play :) sex was always the end result lol 😂 and the clips were clearly a degree of foreplay :) He knew me well enough to know what I liked, how and I liked it and delivered ... very delicious :) Mary xxThe picture I am talking about was the catalyst for this post but not the reason. The subject matter was not important so I did not include it first up. My post is about boundaries as I have reiterated. The question being why send when you haven't ascertained if it's ok with the other party to send pornography? You had boundaries in your relationship with the dom and you both knew that you were involved in that particular dynamic. You knew what to expect - generally - and that was part of your agreed play. You had parameters and expectations. I've had dick pics and all sorts sent to me. If it's a dick pic from a guy I've played with then I tend to say thanks for thinking of me :) If not, I usually giggle, go 'oh boy!' and block. Occasionally I give them an opportunity to explain why... it depends on the situation. I am curious about the motivation behind this apparent disregard for the other party's (possible) sensibilities by ending pornographic images or text that is not in context and may be seen as offensive or confronting. And how the ladies of RHP feel when they receive unsolicited porn from someone they have just started chatting to and/or completely out of context. Boundaries... People have boundaries in real life and they also exist on line. Although some people seem to feel they don't. In real life, a guy I meet for a coffee is unlikely to flash his bits or hold up a pornographic image in a cafe while we are chatting about the weather, what we do for work or where we are going on holidays. Why is it different on line? What is the motivation? How do the ladies feel when a guy ignores their boundaries? That sort of thing. I have a curious open mind and I'm interested. KH xxx PS I feel another profile update may be in order.... :)
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'I_touch_myself2' but what is an 'extemporaneous' image, what was the image? Why not just say what it was. Because you have children? Comments are now being posted about child pornography, and I seriously doubt that is what was sent to you? My opinion, I think it does sound a bit prudish, had you owned/disclosed, the image in question you were referring to, you're asking a question but not willing to say what the image was, my opinion might have been different. I like people to be straight up, honest, no need to be playing a guessing game, seems like a mountain out of a molehill thing to me. Easy fixed, tell us what was in the picture, or we can carry on with the game of charades 😀 I think you have a responsibility here to make sure the child pornography thing doesn't gather it's own momentum, purely because because of your vague op. You need to clarify IMO ITMSThere are plenty of online dictionaries. I suggest you try looking for 'extemporaneous' there and try it work it out for yourself. It's what I was taught to do. And as I have said more than once this post is about boundaries. If other people want to hijack the conversation then that is up to them. There are reasons I will not describe the picture any further and, as it is not the subject matter of the pic I am posting about, will not do so. I am trying to keep this post on track and would appreciate if you accepted that and made an appropriate comment rather than indulge your curiosity about what the image may or may not be. Just saying KH
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RHP User
8 years ago
Sorry 😉
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Sherlock_H
8 years ago
For the life of me, I cannot understand how sending someone an unsolicited pornographic image could be considered a reasonable thing to do. To firstly clarify, I'm not making an anti-porn argument here. Secondly, consider a possible parallel situation. You find yourself talking to a man at an adult night club, perhaps one of the singles meetups, or those nights where single men are allowed in (something I am interested in checking out, if they'll have me). The guy seems nice enough, he respects you in that he doesn't just up an propose sex right there on the couch. You might even be developing a rapport with him. Suddenly, when he feels enough time has passed, he suddenly whips out his phone and starts showing you his favourite porn movie. Or, perhaps more graphically, he suddenly drops his trousers and begins masturbating in front of you. Either of these scenarios would be a serious breach of etiquette, I am certain. Both would likely see the guy ejected from the club and banned from ever returning. Why? Because it was a sudden and unconfirmed escalation of intimacy and sexuality. Perhaps if these two already knew each other, and this was part of their routine, nobody would bat an eye. I suggest that the reason people might find it acceptable here in the digital realms is because of the feeling of anonymity afforded by sitting behind a keyboard. Without having to look the other person in the eye, and without having to deal with any consequences for your actions worse than perhaps being blocked, it suddenly does not seem like such a gross breach of behaviour anymore.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Righto, leave you to it. I have some swatting up on big words to do anyway 👍
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madotara69
8 years ago
You have posted a topic about porn on a porn site, you loaded the thread progressively with a creepy spin to elicit a prescribed response and if the porn that was sent to you was of people of legal age and consenting to fuck or whatever, then I think you are being prudish, disrespectful to one or two of about five hundred billion thousand million people who seek porn on internet porn sites, and RHP is a porn site with webcam live sex chat rooms for extemporaneous pornography broadcasting. Tidying up the topic by tossing away the creepy bit 'picture' pornographic sending 'person' and pushing boundaries on them to be judged. Storm in a teacup and playing for sheep in a cattle station. Mado Mado Tara xx
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RHP User
8 years ago
Exactly Mado. I suspect the increasing change in tone was designed to make me out to be an evil twisted pervert. Haha. I find it very difficult to believe that someone would send a video with such extreme adult themes first up and just because it was shocking to some that doesn't mean that we all would view the same clip in the same way. I don't believe that the clip was what KH is insinuating later in the thread either. Most people with hardcore kinks know that they can't introduce extreme adult themes early in the relationship. KillerHeels I for one know that one of your "examples" is actually a fantasy of someone writing on this thread and I certainly feel the judgement in your tone. As my very first sentence stated the timing is key. Obvoiusly sending something like that so early is weird, socially awkward and shows that some people miss social cues. Why do people send porn to each other - To speed up the flirtation process To build rapport with the other person To display what they are looking for, or what turns them on To have a bit of fun Perhaps as a way of screening the other person Because they move fast Because they are impatient Because they have their hand on it BEcause they spend too much time online with other kinksters and have forgotten that not everyone is into it Numerous other reasons
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RHP User
8 years ago
In response to your questions KH, in real life when I met up with a person from an adult dating site from the very first meeting the discussion is usually around sex, kinks ,what they are into, etc. I am not interested in their boring every day life usually to be honest. I don't want to hear about their ex or their kids. Perhaps I have things backwards - I want to know you sexually first before I get into the day to day stuff. I have met regular guys in upmarket bars and have been shown dick pics within 30 minutes of meeting. Okay, they were younger, in their early 20's. Was I shocked. No. Was I offended. No. Did I laugh. Yes. Has it even worked on me? Well yes, it has once but he was a charming and funny and totally narcissistic charmer! And no, I am not an obvious slut if that was what you were thinking. I dress well and present myself as a professional woman, but I can't help myself if I notice a certain glint in gentlemans or even a lady's eye I can't help but want to shock them. So I absolutely appreciated the same quality in others.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I don't place boundaries on myself. In fact I sincerely can't even remember using that word except when talking about land boundaries or something.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'madotara69' You have posted a topic about porn on a porn site, you loaded the thread progressively with a creepy spin to elicit a prescribed response and if the porn that was sent to you was of people of legal age and consenting to fuck or whatever, then I think you are being prudish, disrespectful to one or two of about five hundred billion thousand million people who seek porn on internet porn sites, and RHP is a porn site with webcam live sex chat rooms for extemporaneous pornography broadcasting. Tidying up the topic by tossing away the creepy bit 'picture' pornographic sending 'person' and pushing boundaries on them to be judged. Storm in a teacup and playing for sheep in a cattle station. Mado Mado Tara xx Hey Mado Tara Have you actually read the post? It's about boundaries. I've explained my motivations and I'm trying to keep this on track. If I choose to go in the chatrooms - my choice... If I choose not to - again my choice. If I choose to cross that boundary, it is my decision to do so. I don't give a flying fig about what people like to watch - porn or documentaries on train spotting - I don't care. Although neither appeal to me by the way ;) - one because I have a vivid imagination and don't need a visual image, the other... well I'm not into trains. As I said before I am not going to describe the content in detail to satisfy anyone's curiosity. It was the catalyst behind this post as I was curious as to why some one would send a pornographic image out of the blue when just getting to know me over messages. It is the motivation I am trying to understand and the way people (especially women because I am one) feel about receiving unsolicited images/material. You choose to believe what you like about me - your choice. I know I'm not a prude nor am I being disrespectful. You choose to believe what you like - your boundary and I won't ask you to cross it. Just saying KH
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RHP User
8 years ago
this has been very enlightening 😯
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RHP User
8 years ago
I and quite a few others agreed with OP, before the subject matter of the photo was revealed. And the topic is about sending unsolicited porn during the getting to know you, not porn itself. So I disagree with whatever point you're trying to make there.
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RHP User
8 years ago
The pornographic image was a dick pic right? Was it a good one, wanna send it to me? 😛
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RHP User
8 years ago
I don't believe this picture was anything more than a dick picture, and your actions, planting child pornography in the minds of respondents here, referring to it as 'porn', is just plain wrong 👎 Your profile was a tough read but I hung in there, it has the same negative, stale, prudish bossy remarks in there. You even refer to their cock as their 'appendage' and if I recall, tell them not to extract it from their pants, like ever 😂😂😂 loosen up, we're here for sex, yes ladies, sorry to say, that is the reason we are here and the nature of this website, it's not CWA lol and I, like Candy said, start with sex, sexting etc. I'm actually shocked it's different for other people. What do you talk about, the weather? Your job? I talk about what I'm going to do to him, and that's in RL as well. We're not all prudes 😏 actually I don't stop at talking about it, RL I mean, usually finish them off lol judge me if you will but I'm not here for tea and scones. It appears plenty are though
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'CandyDelicious' I don't place boundaries on myself. In fact I sincerely can't even remember using that word except when talking about land boundaries or something. I find it very difficult to believe that you have absolutely no boundaries. You may think you'd be up for anything but I'm pretty sure there would be a line, even if you don't exactly know what it is yet. Mado - wasn't aware RHP had suddenly turned into a porn site, how interesting. Seems some people have twisted the OP's topic into an anti-porn rant in their heads, rather than read it and her subsequent replies properly. Also, calling people who don't like or don't watch porn prudes is pretty judgmental from people who claim to be so open minded.
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madotara69
8 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Since when is this a porn site? Good morning to you too Meander, what a lovely day it is.Rather than answer your question, I'de be more interested if you could ?
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RHP User
8 years ago
Sexy thread with all these dictionaries on hand. Someone want to look up the word 'unsolicited'. Was the key word I noticed in the OP.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I didn't think this was about liking porn or not either. For a starters - yes there are options on the site to watch people doing all sorts of sexual things, talking about it etc. And there's pics on profiles of vulvas, cocks, stretched arseholes etc. Again though you can choose to be guest and not have to worry about getting poked in the eye with a cock shot every two seconds. I watch hard core porn sometimes. Doesn't mean I want or appreciate something being sent to me without a heads up first. Don't you have anything better to impress or seduxe me with?
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madotara69
8 years ago
Quoting 'PepperRose' Sexy thread with all these dictionaries on hand. Someone want to look up the word 'unsolicited'. Was the key word I noticed in the OP. Scrolling through this thread alone, all these sexy pics are certainly a distraction, Tara told me this was a mower site and she is the only enthusiast I can find in here on one. Guess unsolicited is open for interpretation by being here in RHP ?
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RHP User
8 years ago
Ban the aeroplane ! Close The Airport ! I demand noise compensation !
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RHP User
8 years ago
Mado would you really send porn to someone you didn't know well, without checking in first? Guess I can manage my ability to converse and ask questions, whilst flitting about in smutty places, amongt so much hot tits and ass. Didn't think it was such a special skill.
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Minx99
8 years ago
I must admit it takes a lot to offend me, but I once received a very up close and personal video from a guy I'd started chatting to. It was exactly the opposite of what I'm into and so explicit I was completely turned off him. I actually didn't know what to say as I didn't want him to feel freakish. So I said I wasn't into that and that we wouldn't match. I couldn't move past that. Cannot unsee. I do like a lot of visual stimulation and I am open to most things and those I chat to and meet know that, so generally nothing is unsolicited! Re the OP s genre No-Nos, I did once have someone ask for an underage fantasy to be fulfilled, and they are a school principal. Shocked and immediately blocked. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Nicotine withdrawals, hair trigger. Worst drug ever perpetuated on humanity, thank goodness we don't have access to firearms GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
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RHP User
8 years ago
that this has largely turned into a thread full of personal attacks on the OP, and by extension on others on here who choose to use this site in a different way. The hypocritical 'you need to respect all my preferences but I'll have a go at you and call you names for yours' is alive and well for some. Really poor form.
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RHP User
8 years ago
No way am I up for anything. Like everyone I have my likes and dislikes. Things that turn me on and things that don't. I just find it odd that people would use the word boundaries when discussing sex. I know, it's only a word but it immediately brings to my mind rules, regulations, no flexibility, being ridgid. It's the associations in my head anyway. As for the question. For me there is a huge difference from someone sending some generic porn to someone sending extreme kinky porn. But I guess that is subjective.
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kinkcat1
8 years ago
I'm the first to put a porno on to set the mood for a kinky night! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'Luck_Dragon' that this has largely turned into a thread full of personal attacks on the OP, and by extension on others on here who choose to use this site in a different way. The hypocritical 'you need to respect all my preferences but I'll have a go at you and call you names for yours' is alive and well for some. Really poor form. Thank you Ms Dragon - I feel that this is why people tend not to post here - for fear of verbal attacks. I have tried to put forward a case about boundaries and overstepping them. I had hoped for an intelligent discussion and to learn more about motivation and the human condition. Instead it turned into a discussion about porn and prudishness and people all but begging me to disclose more about the pic I received. If I did that then it would miss the point. Curiosity is fine and dandy - it is why I am asking a question after all. However, it is not the point of the post. Oh and ITM - if I sent it to you I would be promoting something most would find distasteful. If you can't take my word for it then I'm sorry you feel that way. If anyone had bothered to read my original and subsequent posts, they would hopefully have seen that I really don't care about dick pics and clit pics nor the various sex acts that I see when I browse the profiles on this site. As a platinum member I don't have the same filters (or boundaries) imposed on me to protect my delicate sensibilities or prevent me from seeing cocks, clits and various sex acts that RHP allow the paying members to see. I am an open-minded woman - I wouldn't be here if I wasn't - and people here have no idea of what I do in my life, my experiences and choices.They don't know about my health - mental or physical - my upbringing - whether good bad or indifferent - or what I do in my day job. They don't know anything but what they choose to imagine about me from my profile. My profile is a reflection on what I have experienced here and on other on-line sites. I don't care if people reading it think I am demanding or prudish or judgmental, a dried up old prune. Their perception their reality. I know who I am. I also don't know the motivation behind those who profess to be open minded attacking me for my possible likes, dislikes or boundaries. Or why they feel they have no boundaries or that boundaries do not exist - online or in real life. It is why we have laws - some good and some ridiculous. I am not attacking anyone - just asking a question or two around motivation, likes/dislikes and people's thoughts. I have boundaries I will not cross and boundaries I will push a little or a lot. However, I do not wish to overstep another person's sensibilities or boundaries intentionally. I am no hypocrite.Again - I am looking for intelligent insight into a question around online behaviour and boundaries. Thank you one and allKH
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madotara69
8 years ago
Quoting 'PepperRose' Mado would you really send porn to someone you didn't know well, without checking in first? Guess I can manage my ability to converse and ask questions, whilst flitting about in smutty places, amongt so much hot tits and ass. Didn't think it was such a special skill. because it's easier than sending flowers :) We send our private gallery open with our messages, never have we had a negative telling off, or reply with concerns where we have offended anyone, quite the contrary actually. Cavort: Apply oneself enthusiastically to sexual or disreputable pursuits.‘he spent his nights cavorting with the glitterati’ :)
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RHP User
8 years ago
If you like porn there is nothing wrong with it as long as you enjoy it to your self. I don't agree with sending someone porn just out of the blue bang PORN. Obviously the two parties would be building the conversation to that point using it as a tool to entice one another . In short i love porn and watch it all the time is there something wrong with that ? Who are you to say? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Not necessary and perhaps a little selfish as unsolicited posts are really about the poster getting of on the inappropriate nature of the post. The postee just sees a dick. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
I didn't ask you to send it to me, simply tell us what it was. I call bs. So this person just off the cuff, randomly sent you some pornographic material, something none of us would approve of, apparently, but you aren't prepared to say what the said unacceptable material was? Righto 😏
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RHP User
8 years ago
Let me be perfectly clear, as it seems you don't seem to be able to grasp why it is difficult to answer your op. How can we give an objective opinion when we don't know what was sent to you? My opinion would be very different based on what kind of pornographic material you're talking about, and I'm pretty sure others would see it differently depending on the content, but it sure as hell won't offend every single person. So we're all adults, what's the big secret?
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RHP User
8 years ago
I think I just saw one 😉 missed that
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RHP User
8 years ago
ITM Your issue not mine... How many times do I have to say this? No! I'm not going to indulge your curiosity just because you think it is BS. It is not the subject matter of the pic - just that the pic was sent in the 'getting to know you' stage - and out of the blue. If you don't understand what I'm getting at then I can't help that..... I have no issue with who likes what - just why people think its ok to send unsolicited porn electronically when I am pretty sure they wouldn't do it in person. I don't care what consenting adults do to spice up their sex life or what they do when messaging. The point is they are consenting to that method of play and foreplay. They have agreed to it. I did not consent to receiving porn pics - I am clear in my profile about dick pics and the like. Personally I prefer the real thing. I ask for my edification.... KH
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RHP User
8 years ago
I've never thought of dick pics or sex pics as porn, never referred to them that way and am rarely offended by them, quite the opposite usually, interesting how different women are 😃
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PurePeony
8 years ago
Sorry that a perfectly good thread has become rather angstful. Please never stop posting because of that. ;) I think because of the more "open" sexual nature of RHP, some people do forget that certain things, eg sending unsolicited porn of a controversial nature, might not be met with approval. I agree it can be disturbing when it is unsolicited. Enjoying porn clips in one's privacy and as a choice is different from receiving unsolicited porn. It is not about being prudish but more about being respectful and appropriate. It's akin to one acting all slutty in a role play with a trusted FWB...very different from being called "slut!" when one walks past a group of men in a pub. It's all about the comfort level between the parties involved sometimes. OP, in your case, it sounds like the other party has taken liberties too soon and without establishing boundaries. Plus the content seems rather upsetting due to the category of porn, as you have suggested. Little wonder that it would leave you somewhat disturbed.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I'm not offended by porn. I wouldn't consider someone's PG porn either. Considering what I have been up to myself, seen at fet events and in fetlife, there is not much that bothers me. Anyone in my inner circle can send me anything they like and I wouldn't be bothered, because we know each other and what is cool. But the issue in this thread for me is the 'unsolicited'. And if someone I didn't know sent me something that was non sequitur, and unasked for, I'd be unimpressed. "Want to see ...?" Is all that is required. In all my years of dating, only 3 people overstepped that line.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'PurePeony' Sorry that a perfectly good thread has become rather angstful. Please never stop posting because of that. ;) I think because of the more "open" sexual nature of RHP, some people do forget that certain things, eg sending unsolicited porn of a controversial nature, might not be met with approval. I agree it can be disturbing when it is unsolicited. Enjoying porn clips in one's privacy and as a choice is different from receiving unsolicited porn. It is not about being prudish but more about being respectful and appropriate. It's akin to one acting all slutty in a role play with a trusted FWB...very different from being called "slut!" when one walks past a group of men in a pub. It's all about the comfort level between the parties involved sometimes. OP, in your case, it sounds like the other party has taken liberties too soon and without establishing boundaries. Plus the content seems rather upsetting due to the category of porn, as you have suggested. Little wonder that it would leave you somewhat disturbed. Thank you Peony. It is about context and boundaries. As per the Cambridge dictionary, a boundary is a real or imagined line that marks the edge or limit of something. Some people enjoy pushing their boundaries - all of them or just the one or two. A boundary is not necessarily a rigid thing. I enjoy pushing my own boundaries, doing things I might never have experienced. However, I do not wish to overstep the boundaries others have/require nor do I wish for others to overstep mine. If they know me and we decide together to push a boundary or two it can be fun for both, one or none. But it was agreed. The context of our messaging was getting to know you. Hi how are you? what are you doing this weekend? A couple of double entendres, light flirting, chit chat. I think most of us get the idea. A wish goodnight and then wham! a porn pic. I'm clear about boundaries in my profile. I say what I say about dick pics not because they offend me - just that they are unimaginative and I like to discover a man's body for myself. When it comes to a penis - I'm not into size or shape, cut or uncut. However, my profile says I prefer not to receive or see dick pics I like to leave it up to my imagination and see if my guess was right. :) . My profile has other hints and tips ;) My post has been about motivations - is it to shock? To exert control? Because they have no idea about women? Unimaginative? Then how do women truly feel when someone oversteps their boundaries? Do they like porn out of the blue? Out of context. I watched an ABC documentary on S & M - Questions people have always wanted to ask. Boundaries exist in their world and are important. They mentioned how they felt when their clearly defined boundaries were crossed. If people cross boundaries electronically, what would they do in person? Would they do in person what they do online? I am truly curious. And yet I have been verbally attacked for being judgemental and a prude. Snide comments about using dictionaries - oh boy! I received a private message from one man who was polite and supportive. Now I know why. If he had openly supported me, he ran the risk of being attacked in the post. I will post again - not sure when or the subject. However, I just wish people would read the thread of the post before they put their 2 cents in. It's sad that so many so called 'open minded' people made assumptions then verbally attacked someone they don't know just for asking a couple of questions. I wish all well and I think I will watch from the wings for a while. And play with my friends :) KH
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RHP User
8 years ago
That's a no, thank you very much. Very poor form and likely the end of that interaction if it were to happen to me. Peachy
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RHP User
8 years ago
Sending unsolicited porn to someone you barely know is not cool... Nor does it make that person a prude for not liking or appreciating it. I don't judge others for being into stuff I'm not (as long as it ONLY involves consenting adults), but not judging is very different from being subjected to anything without thought/consideration for your personal preferences. Not sending inappropriate or potentially offensive material to others is easy, even my 13yo gets it To the usual suspects who used this as an opportunity to point out how cool and edgy they are, while putting others down and suggesting that being offended by a basic lack of respect is prudish - so many eye rolls for you
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RHP User
8 years ago
You asked two questions, and I'm going to try and answer both without going off topic."What are your first thoughts?" In the scenario that you describe, where the messaging has been flirting and general chit chat (with no overt sexual overtones), my first thought would be WTF? What did I say/do that might indicate that I'd be receptive to that?"What do you think of the person that sent it to you without checking to see if you were into porn?" I would think that the person isn't on the same page as me, and is probably not someone I'd continue to engage with. I wouldn't think anything less of them necessarily - they may have misread my cues. But it indicates someone moving faster than I'm comfortable with, similar to when someone asks me straight up for access to my PG's in a first message.I'm by no means a prude (and I don't think you are either)... I enjoy porn and I use it like both CandyDelicious and Mary described early on. But the key is that any porn I send or receive is 'solicited' . Either early on in the communication or some way down the track, both of us have expressed an interest and indicated that its ok to send/receive.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Quoting 'Betty7216' Sending unsolicited porn to someone you barely know is not cool... Nor does it make that person a prude for not liking or appreciating it. I don't judge others for being into stuff I'm not (as long as it ONLY involves consenting adults), but not judging is very different from being subjected to anything without thought/consideration for your personal preferences. I don't care for it when people send me unsolicited kid pics either, that doesn't mean children offend me. Or maybe it does... I'm pretty sure I saw some evidence of 'kid' love from you this morning More likely to get plant porn from me
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting KillerHeels "My post has been about motivations - is it to shock? To exert control? Because they have no idea about women? Unimaginative?" Of course that is exactly right. You know this may shock some of you and I don't want to offend you all because I know this is a "social networking site" (cough cough, eye roll ) but I would suggest that most men contacting you are contacting you with the hope that you will have a sexual relationship of some sort. Of course, a social fuck perhaps. LMAO So the guy misread some cues online. It is pretty easy to do you know. I am going too ingnore the comments about the extreme porn you made in subsequent posts KH because that was not your question plus I don't believe it happened anyway. But a person is sending you those pictures or porn because it is a turn on for them and they are hoping to turn you on as well. It really is as simple as that. I think that you are totally over thinking it and quite simply are not accepting any person's response if it is not agreeable with your own view point. That is how I see it. Move on! I think that you are going to have to accept that this will happen on occasion when you are on a adult site. If you don't like it, why did you open the link and watch it? Why would you do that? Loved Mado's response to the porn site comment. Definition of porn.... is RHP. Totally. Love it!!
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'CandyDelicious' quite simply are not accepting any person's response if it is not agreeable with your own view point. the irony
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'CandyDelicious' Move on! I think that you are going to have to accept that this will happen on occasion when you are on a adult site. If you don't like it, why did you open the link and watch it? Why would you do that? It's actually KH's thread, so I'm thinking she doesn't need to move on
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RHP User
8 years ago
It was a link? This is what I mean about not reading posts... It was a picture on kik... not a link, not a video but a picture. An 'in your face' picture. I don't click on links for e-security reasons. You believe what you like Candy.... it happened. I'm not going to tell you what it was as that is not the point! I'm here to meet tall intelligent men (and women who are a little more difficult to find) for an ongoing FWB dynamic. Those people to build trust and push boundaries together - not to overstep them in the getting to know you stage. Or the men that believe RHP is pimping women because it's a sex site... yes I had a guy say that to me... I'm here to meet likeminded sexual people and to enjoy our play times. Look at yourself before attacking others for their sensibilities... open minds works both ways ... Just saying KH
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'KillerHeelz' This is what I mean about not reading posts... on here. Many people seem to very briefly skim the topic - if they even do that as some seem to read the title only - and many also don't seem to read follow up replies properly or at all. Probably partly because of the common opinion here that anything over three lines is too demanding of their attention.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I didn't skim the topic and neither did anyone else. Nice try 😉 We're talking about a dick pic just in case you missed that, read the rest of my last post, save me repeating myself, thanks 😀 No-one skimmed over anything except the op
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RHP User
8 years ago
I will cope that. It is true that I only briefly skim some of the comments.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I don't remember an oral thread, although I plead the 5th if I have contributed to that thread. I don't remember it. Lol
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'I_touch_myself2' I didn't skim the topic and neither did anyone else. Nice try 😉 We're talking about a dick pic just in case you missed that, read the rest of my last post, save me repeating myself, thanks 😀 No-one skimmed over anything except the op Read the posts.... not a dick pic. I haven't skimmed over anything - only those who have not read the full post are skimming. Whether they are being deliberately obtuse or not, I have no idea. I am tired of continuously repeating myself and trying to keep this on topic.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I'll try again. Betty, this part of your comment "To the usual suspects who used this as an opportunity to point out how cool and edgy they are, while putting others down and suggesting that being offended by a basic lack of respect is prudish - so many eye rolls for you". Please reread the first page or two of posts, few porkie pies in there, op wasn't clear about the topic and refused to clarify it, worse, led some to believe the content was of a vile/sick nature? I don't eyeroll much. I can't be bothered, I'm too busy. But your dig here is unjustified. I also agree with Candy, most men are on here with the intention of finding sex, sending a dick pic and getting that reaction, shocking yes, not that he sent it, that he got that reaction. Maybe before you judge, maybe save you a few eyerolls, consider how this evolved and who had control over that 😃
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RHP User
8 years ago
Re the prude comments, there are sites that are more suited for less sexual people, I'm not suggesting they leave, but why would they even want to be here, if the pornographic nature of the site offends them. I simply don't understand, why they make that choice, then get offended and complain. Up to the individual to choose an appropriate site surely? Well, least I know I'm in the right place 😎
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'I_touch_myself2' I didn't skim the topic and neither did anyone else. Nice try 😉 We're talking about a dick pic just in case you missed that, read the rest of my last post, save me repeating myself, thanks 😀 No-one skimmed over anything except the op CD just admitted she skims comments. It's never good to make statements on behalf of everyone because you have no idea what they do or don't do. Also, how do you know we're talking about a dick pic? The OP has told you numerous times that she's not going to tell you what the pic was of. Again, seems to me that you're the one not reading her comments properly.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Not interested in getting into an exchange with you, you but these two pieces of text and the change of tone about the apparent disgusting nature of the 'porn', tell the story IMO if you don't share my opinion, that's absolutely fine, I don't care, but I'm entitled to my opinion. Extract quote from comment op posted on page 1 of this topic - "I'm not easily shocked as I have a broad mind and understand people view porn differently. I don't care about dick pics or clit pics or bondage pics or sex acts in general- each to their own. I would normally send a message back saying that I prefer not to receive them. If they persist then blocked and finished. However, I have received one where the subject matter was not what I would normally expect any adult to enjoy. I even asked a friend to confirm I wasn't being over sensitive. Nope! I wasn't. I didn't show it to all and sundry as once seen you can't unsee." Extract quote from comment op posted on page 4 - "I did not consent to receiving porn pics - I am clear in my profile about dick pics and the like. Personally I prefer the real thing." Bit of a downturn or downtone there? Mado summed it up perfectly, it was given a creepy tone to get a prescribed response, and as I have made very clear, I would react differently depending on the subject matter of the pornographic material hence my request for that small but important detail?? Who did you say was skimming over things? Not me certainly, I'm very thorough 😀 as for Candy, she can speak for herself yes, but that's just a diversion from the main point of my post now isn't it? I would give examples of material that I wouldn't approve of, but it seems someone is dusting 😉 so won't do that. You're entitled to your opinion, I respect that, but we'll have to agree to disagree. I'm out, enjoy the topic 👍 moving on now
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RHP User
8 years ago
If there's been a bit of flirting, I don't see how people could get offended by it. I send photos of porn, things I like to experience when I'm with a guy so they get an idea of what type of sex I like, even though I do mention it in my profile doesn't mean the guy will give it to me unless they like to please my needs, some guys just want a hole or two to stick it in, that's when you know their amateurs lol porn can help and I think you got to have an open mind to even be on this sight 😜 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
To all my fellow skimmers out there, I said that I found the question prudish and that I sometimes find people who are anti porn to be prudish. I have never stated that I found KH to be a prude. Did I? Or maybe I did... someone who skimmed my responses did I say that? I don't remember and CBF going back. Thanks in advance. CD xx :P
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RHP User
8 years ago
I do often skim certain people's comments, or ignore them altogether
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RHP User
8 years ago
Don't get offended by the inevitable dick pics, bizarrely we actually don't see them as ugly... Think of the pics like the dead bird your pet cat left in your slippers as a gift to show you that he loves you.... Its disgusting, you don't want it but we are proud of it and we want to give it to you.... As much as we can... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Quoting 'Sailbadthesinner' Ban the aeroplane ! Close The Airport ! I demand noise compensation ! for resumption of air operations. The jet wash is so far overhead I'm confident many will not have a hair out of place! I have just opened (for the first time) and read this thread (in it's entirety). It stands as clear example of the failure of some to properly read and comprehend the written word, or to know and understand the definition of words. KH's original and subsequent posts are crystal clear. The only flaw I detect is one I too am guilty of (as a friend once suggested to me): "You're engaged in a battle of wits against an unarmed man!"
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RHP User
8 years ago
(as there has already been so much confusion in this thread): @Sailbad, I'm joking with you, not at you. Just drawing on the theme you'd introduced.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Sorry, that's just my profile photo. I should read more then the line, I shall try to remember that.
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RHP User
8 years ago
=D - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Hi there bonbon
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RHP User
8 years ago
Hi bonbon
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