Ways to ask about pleasure

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Ive always found men prefer to asked rather than told. So maybe some thing along the lines of, "baby, my gfs and I were talking about this video one of them found and we were all debating whether it was accurate or not, do you want to watch it and see which of us you agree with?". Good luck!

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  him how you like to pleasure yourself,masturbate for him,most men love this particularly if they are anxious to please you.Don't make cumming a big deal,enjoy the journey,relaxation is the key here.He may be speeding up because he is anxious that you aren't getting what you need. As to the video it might just reinforce for him that he is not doing it right for you.Tease him,ask him what he likes and how he likes it,then tell him what he is doing RIGHT for you,say ''I love it when you do this,and I really love it when .......I am touched,licked sucked etc there''. It takes some time for new lovers to explore each others bodies,everyone is different. An instructional video may float his boat if you bring it up in the right context but it could also be a big turn off for him.

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Sympathies with your plight., But iif its important just come out with it. "I have something I want you to see" Bite the bullet and if he is into you as much as you are into him then there is no problem. If he is not then best you get it over with because it will not work in the long run. But that is easy for me to say from this side of the net. I have been in the same boat and found it hard to present a personal desire with someone I love and don't want to lose. I have learnt that if it is like that, its pointless to continue as it will happen again and again.So keep it as simple as you can, maybe blush a little, but do it now rather then let fear of desire not expressed lead to the enviable frustration that will chip away at something that may be wonderful. Communication, free and uninhibited is a must for any long term relationship. Oh and the wonder of total uninhibited communication is worth the few seconds it takes to utter the words.Plenty of fish in the sea.IMHO.

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  Mr_MrsAraps

  12 years ago

  OMG73, Have watched this video as well and think its is really good with Nina especially being really informative and gives lots of great tips, ideas and techniques that I have found have worked really well. Its is also as you say really good for telling guys to slow right down and work you way into things including arousing your partners mind first.From a guys perspective I watched the vid as I wanted to be better informed and better able to please my partner and very glad I did as is really informative and reckon any guy should watch it if he wants to learn a few things.As to how to bring it up, I reckon start while he is at work with some sexy text messages throughout the day saying you have got something hot planned for tonight etc to get him thinking and stewing. When he gets home let him stew some more and no touching as you want to watch the vid and not get straight into things. Maybe cook dinner in something sexy or nothing at all (unless you have kids lol). Have a glass of wine then just put the video on and say I want to watch this with you and (just take a little control) but no getting distracted. Then you have plenty of time and visuals at the end of the movie to try everything out like a kid in a candy store.Cheers, W.

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  I think approximately 60 - 70% of females don't ever actually orgasm at all, please don't quote me on that, but I do remember being very surprised at the high number. So most guys are very open to being told what works...   You point out that the video gets you very aroused, perhaps you could use this as a way to share it with him ( "I was googling porn the other day and this video popped up, I was curious and found that it gets me really horny"), and when you see a technique that you'd like to try - " Mmmm Wow, I love when he does that to her, Oh yeah baby I want what she's having, lets give that a shot!", I'm pretty sure he'll be fine about it, most guys are just rapped to have a woman who a) likes to share porn b) is adventurous, and c) can let him know what she wants.   Or you could take the reverse approach, tell him you want to be more adventurous in the blowjob department, find an instructional video about it and give him the whole 'new experience' and try out all the techniques you see, he will love it, then say "OMG that was fun, lets do me now!"   Good luck and as Freya said, just relax and have fun with it, enjoy the journey and the orgasm will take care of itself.

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  If this video aroused you . I would imagine it would arouse him also. If I was your guy and you suggested we sit down and watch the video together , I wouldnt mind at all... Unless selfish, I think most guys would think the same..Why dont you tell him how much you love oral and you're keen to explore some new ways together.. Some times you just gotta do the things that scares you to get to where your going...Jay

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Quoting 'Mischeviouslad'Even consider pausing the film and say.... "god, I want you to do that to me RIGHT FUCKING NOW".He will NOT take it badly.DG That is a very good call !

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  inspirit

  12 years ago

  are simply not mind readers....May I suggest you take another big breath and talk to him about how your body reacts to stimuli and his own.... is there any thing you can do to please him more...... he may ask the same and then you suggest this video. If you feel you do not have the confidence to do this.. how about a few wines. Other than that ... push his head into your pussy and tell him what you want

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Quoting 'Saskia72'   Or you could take the reverse approach, tell him you want to be more adventurous in the blowjob department, find an instructional video about it and give him the whole 'new experience' and try out all the techniques you see, he will love it, then say "OMG that was fun, lets do me now!"

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Can we suggest that you enjoy a night in with him, nice dinner and drinks and just bring the subject up if he likes to watch porn. If he does suggest he rings a DVD over next time he comes over, and you pop your one on as well, that way you both should be in the mood to watch and role play. Have fun!

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  He will want to please you and be willing to put his pride aside to learn how to better please his lady. I would personally be shitty if I found out I was not doing something right and my partner was either too shy or didn't want to hurt my feelings to tell me. Everyone is different. If you think he may be too sensitive I would make out like it is YOU that has the problem. You are the one that has trouble climaxing, it is not due to a lack of skills on his behalf. That may take the pressure off him. Good luck Micksecrets

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Quoting 'BiBrissieBabe' Ive always found men prefer to asked rather than told. So maybe some thing along the lines of, "baby, my gfs and I were talking about this video one of them found and we were all debating whether it was accurate or not, do you want to watch it and see which of us you agree with?". Good luck! Yep TOTALLY AGREE...the good "ol girlfriend techniques always works a treat!!

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  call me I do have my list of the hotest lil lickers on RHP   willing to share with ya   I have two who are exceptional and some of my other girlfriends can vouch for their skills   but like they all say here just approach him , whats the worst that can happen?   you move on down the line to a guy that does listen to your needs   ps girls coffee day will be comming up soon, and I will book a hotel again and update pictures for anyone that comes. may even get some naked men to serve us drinks and nibblies

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  Lifes_great

  12 years ago

  Quoting 'Jay_Me'If this video aroused you . I would imagine it would arouse him also. If I was your guy and you suggested we sit down and watch the video together , I wouldnt mind at all... Unless selfish, I think most guys would think the same..Why dont you tell him how much you love oral and you're keen to explore some new ways together.. Some times you just gotta do the things that scares you to get to where your going...JayI'm with Jay on this one. If it aroused you, then chances are he'd be good to go as well. From my point of view I have no issue with a partner telling me what they want/like. I think Inspirit got it right when she said 'Men are simply not mind readers'. I would personally prefer to have some guidance to make sure it is as pleasurable as possible for you.

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  RHP User

  12 years ago

  Men tend to be pretty solutions oriented so the fact that you have a possible solution to your dilemma is a good sign. Just come right out and say that you enjoy what you normally do but that you want to experiment and try different things out to see if it will get you there quicker. Tell him you have a video you'd like to watch with him that you think you'd both enjoy and that you'd like to try some of the techniques in the video as they turn you on. Sometimes men can have fragile egos with regard to their prowess in the bedroom but if you bring it up as a fun thing to try out I reckon he'd jump at the chance. My experience has always been that guys want to know how to push the right buttons and are generally eager for any instruction or guidance you can give them. Good luck and great orgasms!

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