F37
What are the good things that happen after your break up?
October 19 2012
Comments
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RHP User
12 years ago
1) the ability to BREATH again 2) The singles game is pretty good.. even for an old fella 3) yes, the bills are lower 4) I CAN black snake it IF I want to.. I dont do it.. but, I can :) 5) the THINGS are eat, are ALWAYS in the cupboard when I want them 6) the excitement of a new adventure 7) no more nagging 8) no more walking on egg shells 9) etc etc etc NOW Nostalgic girl.... "Mouth to Mouth" may revive the life which has been sucked out of you... BUT.. "Mouth down South" should TOTALLY so do it for you So.. get amoungst it and get some GOOD therapy happening. . I have gone over every one of the major relationships in my life... that I can remember being sobre for... and decided that all the pain I felt was NOT pain at all.. It was always fear of the ego.. fear of rejection, fear of starting over, fear of what everyone will think. fear of what this is going to cost me.... etc etc Of course, once you have settled down and gone over this relationship you just left, you will probablyflick a couple of the above, and add a few others.. You may know what I mean.. Surely, the pain comes from the realization that the relationship is failing, OR that it has in fact failed. And even then.. IF you went through the "What did I do wrong.." part, the pain is the anger that you feel after putting so much into the relationship, and it has been a huge waste of time energy and money. Or the anger at not seeing how it was going.. the anger at seeing signs a long time ago.. but getting talked out of acting on those signs.. MORE SO if it was yourself who did the talking you out stuff :) Anyway.. good luck here kiddo... go have fun :) caveman
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RHP User
12 years ago
FREEDOM...x R
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RHP User
12 years ago
I have a list a mile long! Yes, the bills went way down which is a major plus! No more walking on eggshells, constantly worrying about what I should say and how I should say it. No more having to justify everything that I did or what I spent "his" money on. No more feeling depressed and trapped, or wondering what the hell was I thinking 10 years ago?Overall, I can breathe again! Best decision I ever made.
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RHP User
12 years ago
For the no nagging bit. The rest I could handle with Prozac. :p
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RHP User
12 years ago
I am single again ...not from choice but because my husband died suddenly so the things I enjoy about being single ....... The independence and not having to consider another persons feelings ( I know that sounds a tad selfish) ......... Choosing to do things when and where I feel like it without having to make a phone call ..... Yes !!! That Extra money to spend ....... But there are also things I miss....... But all in all life as a single is pretty enjoyable .....
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RHP User
12 years ago
SEX ! 6yr drought was broken within a fortnight (from Oasis no less !)Many things, but the biggies are no more walking on eggshells, Music ! What I like when and as loud as I want !Forming a deeper more personal relationship with my children.Being back in control of my money, and my life.Meeting amazing people in total freedomGoing for a yacht, with no bloody whinging !
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Smilingwithfun
12 years ago
Interesting thought. That which we missed by being in a relationship blossoms when we become single. After time that what we miss about being in a relationship causes us to start dating again. Being single, thinking about what could make the next relationship better.For now,enjoying my time.
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RHP User
12 years ago
freedom..the right to do what i want when i want .no nagging from partner when phone goes off,no being accused of of cheating on parntner each i day i would go off to work.id like to say the bills have gone down,but they actually gone up.once kids are born living life of single guy costs more then being in a family..and not having to put the toilet seat down lol
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RHP User
12 years ago
Being able to do what I want and who I want. Whenever I want.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'MsElle40'I have a list a mile long! Yes, the bills went way down which is a major plus! No more walking on eggshells, constantly worrying about what I should say and how I should say it. No more having to justify everything that I did or what I spent "his" money on. No more feeling depressed and trapped, or wondering what the hell was I thinking 10 years ago? Overall, I can breathe again! Best decision I ever made. Add to that you can fuck who you want when you want! But I agree with every point made by Ms Elle; I felt trapped, financially controlled, emotionally abused and wondering what the HELL I was thinking when I decided to marry a man who couldn't even ASK me to marry him?! (I had to tell him if he was attempting to ask me the answer was yes) Hingsight is wonderful, but breathing freely without answering to anyone... you just can't beat it! Added bonuses for me include: eating icecream from the tub without judgement. letting rip without judgement. walking around buck naked without judgement- do we see a pattern here? Letting my dishes pile up for a couple of days because I can't be bothered doing them... without judgement.Flirting with barstaff and getting given a number on a scrap of paper from a toy-boy who turned out to be barely legal... HA! Now that made my night. Have fun with it, singledom is proving to be fun and exciting as well as confusing and scary as hell.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Apart from my bills going down (which i mentioned initially) - I am letting my dishes pile up for a couple of days, just because I can, and no one will say absolutely nothing, yayyyyy. That's right up my list of goodies. But I am sure you've got a point there Smillingwithfun - I am sure the missing what "you" loathed will come back sooner or later.
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luvsilver
12 years ago
Question for Cavey What is Blacksnake??? Mr Luvsilver
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goldcoastcple69
12 years ago
yes i do miss life without someone nagging at me all the time lol theres alot of good to look forward to now that your single.. some things ull miss about being a relationship , but i really think when were single again, after a while , we forget the annoying stuff like nagging , arguments ,having to clean up after the other half all the time etc etc.. man just enjoy it while its there lol
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inspirit
12 years ago
i black snaked it the other week....to much wine lol
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RHP User
12 years ago
black snaking - I'm curious now too
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avidmale
12 years ago
That you wouldnt make the same mistake twice.A lot of the responses seem to be materialistic. But i think the one thing i got out of a break was the above. (although this may be something that takes longer to realise than the bills :) )Just thought of another. No worrying about the insecurities of the partner.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Other than that, the way the relationship ended, left me a broken shell of what I was. Now I'm still rebuilding and being damn fussy about it. The downside is she wasn't a drinker so I always had a designated driv lol. Other than that it's good so far, as long as I'm not single/or dating for too long
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RHP User
12 years ago
The freedom to be myself, by myself
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RHP User
12 years ago
music festivalsno cricket on the tv all summerno rugby league on the tv all winterno tvbuying new instruments without being questioned about how I spend my moneygoing to pubs, clubs and partiesnot having to put up with someone who argues because they are borednot having to put up with someone who sulks and gives me the silent treatmentnot having to put up with someone who is more fragile than spun glasstravel interstate and o/sliberation from expectation and judgementHave fun being single, and have fun when you're not. . . .
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RHP User
12 years ago
blacksnaking it, is when you come home from work... get into whatever you are into.. and crash out in bed.. still dirty from work.. and generally (but not necessarily) still in your work clothes. It is an original Aussie outback term. So, nothing terrible.. andit is generally ok for women, but us men stink :) We do get it a lot on construction and mining camps.. where the lads get "On the Piss" and crash out on their beds.. :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'cavey50' blacksnaking it, is when you come home from work... get into whatever you are into.. and crash out in bed.. still dirty from work.. and generally (but not necessarily) still in your work clothes. It is an original Aussie outback term. So, nothing terrible.. andit is generally ok for women, but us men stink :) We do get it a lot on construction and mining camps.. where the lads get "On the Piss" and crash out on their beds.. :) Googled it There are more explanations for the phrase it appears. But those are for another forum...
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RHP User
12 years ago
*chuckles* yeeeeesss .. there are a few... However... the one I listed was what i was referring to :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
And having the power to abuse it. Which I shall do shortly. Be fore warned RHP
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inspirit
12 years ago
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RHP User
12 years ago
Hey Hun:) My Sincere best wishes that your New Beginning is one where you can Embrace your Journey where ever it takes you ..Learn Pos Lessons overcome grow from your Previous Relationship.Know there's no failed Relationships .. The Only Failure is if you learn nothing and repeat the same Emotional Outcome .. I lost all My Money and My Possessions from My 2 Marriages ending 1st 28yrs other 7yrs .However I gained a sense of Myself I did Grow from My Experiences ..Having very Little Funds I appreciate the little things most People take for granted .The little Kindnesses others share with me. Not everything is about Money, material things.. I know what My Priorities are in this part of My Life..I'm true to myself.I'm blessed as a result of this. My Spiritual Abilities have grown. I'm able to help others..I can Embrace My Passion in anyway I wish, be it to ease Pain or with a Lover in a Sexual Encounter.. I Love the freedom to be who I am not need to Compromise...I can do what I want when I want to a degree.. I Adore the Choices In Lovers on Offer.Each Connection is unique .Infact this has spoilt me.. I doubt I'll ever be a 1 Man Woman again.Even if I form a Special Relationship, there will always be a Lover or 2 who comes along with the dealmmmmmYUM! he!he!.. In the Main I agree with the Women who replied too..Cheers Lu :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
well I get the freedom, Im out of the golden cage, I can catch up with my passion and interest.I can surf when I feel like, I dont get judge when I talked about other girls, I can nurture my soul again
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