RHP

RHP User

F67

What would you do

March 04 2013

if you met someone here who ticked all your boxes but you knew they were not interested in an exclusive relationship ....would you go there hoping that they would change their mind or would you run?

Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    If you mean non-monogamous that wouldn't bother me (provided he was respectful of my safety and reputation). If you mean as though he didn't want to commit to me, then I'd run a mile - life's way to short to waste it with someone who doesn't want to put you first.

  • xFunlovingx

    xFunlovingx

    12 years ago

    How you feel about it! For me I am not looking for anything exclusive and would bonk his brains out until he found someone that does want to be exclusive with him! I would then move onto the next one! I had to tell my FB that there was never going to be more than just sex with us and at first he took it hard...but now he is liking our arrangement! If they are the ones that want something exclusive...then I run a mile! xFunlovingx

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Do I want this person in my life?Is my life better for having them in it?Can I accept what they are willing to offer and be happy, truly happy?Answer the questions knowing how you feel today, for we know not what tomorrow may bring.Listen to your gut for the answer

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I would walk away and forget him. Not even go there to begin with. If a guy says he doesn't want anything exclusive then he means he doesn't want anything exclusive. No relationship of any kind at all. It would be foolish to compromise myself by trying to change his mind under the guise of being fwb's. Trying to change someone through manipulation does not work. If I still went down that track knowing full well and it didn't work out in my favour then it would be my fault not his. As he has been honest in the beginning. I value my life and I am not prepared to take a gamble like that at my age. Much rather invest in myself than in someone else.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    and in any case I would never expect someone to 'change their mind' just as much as I'd expect that someone wouldn't try to change my mind. Also, if someone ticked all my boxes, it's in my nature to share!!!

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I'm assuming you mean for a relationship?   I'm open to either a non monogomous or a monogomous relationship, depending on what makes us both happy.   For the right person i'd consider exclusivity, in fact it wouldn't worry me at all.   Much communication and honesty would need to happen either way before a decision could be made.

  • Mischeviouslad

    Mischeviouslad

    12 years ago

    If someone you meet didnt want a 'relationship'.... and you did.......... theres a significant box of yours that cant be ticked.So you'd have a decision to make as to the nature of your "friendship"... if any friendship at all.DG

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I would go there happily but I would never go there hoping to change there mind. If you knew this from the outset that means the person has had enough honesty to let you know where they stand. If you set out to change them from the beginning, it will more than likely end up messy and embarrasing. Yet again if you go there, accept the fact that it's not exclusive, then fall in love later, that's a tough one. It does happen.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Quoting 'paintme'and in any case I would never expect someone to 'change their mind' just as much as I'd expect that someone wouldn't try to change my mind. Also, if someone ticked all my boxes, it's in my nature to share!!! Already got one wife ;)

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Certainly an interesting situation to be in.. As a good friend of mine says to me "What will be, will be". Foxy - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    ... Being exclusive is not one of my boxes. I would be more than happy for my Lover to have other lovers. I don't want to tie anyone down or be tied down. If that was what developed then that's fine but it's not what I'm seeking. It's a doomed enterprise to try to change someone, only they can do that.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    We are talking about MALE/FEMALE OP?? Who is the male and which is the female role?I am going out on a limb here and go female is the one looking at male with boxes ticked and male one saying don't want exclusive relationship.This situation may be UNIQUE but's not really.I gather it happens all the time on this site, and with roles reversed...???I think ones Integrity, self-worth and honor is worth more than a few ticked boxes.I could never be manipulative and make someone change their mind just to be with me.Sorry that's just something that is not in my character..That's scraping the bottom of the barrel.It would Kinda looks like one would be taken advantage of, just so he can get his rocks off all in the name of the chase and a quick F*CK....sorry but I think a women is worth more than that.I would dislike this situation very much if this happened to me...would hurt me deep down, so I guess don't really know what to do except try and control all my emotions around them..BUT if there is a strong connection (A CONNECTION IS A CONNECTION) sometimes that just happens, I think I would take my time to get to know him as a "Friend"... definitely NO sex!!!!!!I think the whole KEY is communication...get that right and get the relationship right.I wish sometimes Men and Women really understood each other - but we don't and that's the reality.Foxy

  • inspirit

    inspirit

    12 years ago

    I would move on. As clearly if some one ticked all my boxes then I would be looking for a relationship.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    folks I did not say,CHANGE their mind by manipulating them,I said HOPING they would change their mind. I think many people hope for exclusivity when they find someone they really connect with.But some people as others have said,are happy to share. This is purely a hypothetical for me,I certainly haven't found anyone that I have such a strong connection with but on many profiles I read,that they are looking for NSA but if someone special came along they would consider a relationship. I was just curious to hear from others how they felt about a situation like this.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    i dont have any boxes to have ticked   Dam i need some boxes   Where does one get boxes   Cant run in boxes / tackle swings about too much   Tackle Box ... Perfect off to find a tackle box

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    ya need to find some BOXERS,not the pugilistic variety but those tighty whitey cotton ones .Then you need to post a pic of you in them here.We will definitely give ya a big TICK then.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Quoting 'Freya13' ya need to find some BOXERS,not the pugilistic variety but those tighty whitey cotton ones .Then you need to post a pic of you in them here.We will definitely give ya a big TICK then. Make sure they are "CLEAN with no stains", tightly whitey cotton boxer ones.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Our heart tends to dictate who we love not our heads   and we dont always love the ones that are good for us or to us     But in the end...sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith and believe   If this person is meant to be - they will......................   So in answer to your question Freya -I would go there but with a open mind and heart and never would I want that person to be anything but who they truly are, (to thine own self be true) which is surely what would have attracted me to them in first place...     - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    i shall pack it with my Lure

  • madotara69

    madotara69

    12 years ago

    Is this another one word that has an automatic meaning for a sense to feelings, to a story told. Just an observation,no pun intended.Hope and manipulation have nothing in common, unless they have met and spent time together. Then there is meaning to the thought. Maybe one would see hoping and read manipulation to it. It is their story, I feel they may wish to confine in you, when the time is right. Miss FreyaMado

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Have you been reading my mind?I have been thinking about the word hope.I am not sure if it is a positive word or a cruel word,maybe it depends on the context.Still thinking.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    I'm an all or nothing kind of girl. I've had my years of fuck and run. The joy and love and fun and excitement I have to offer someone will reveal itself slowly and beautifully over time. I want to unwrap them in the same way. No distractions. No hurry. Just a long, slow, sexy, meandering love and life together. There's a place for everything in this world, and I would respect his wish to have sex, or relationships with other women. But I would also respect my own desire not to have these things in my life and I'd leave him be to pursue his own path without me on it. Anything would just be a bastardisation of my heart and end up tearing us apart anyway.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    "Anything else"

  • RHP

    RHP User

    12 years ago

    Very simple

  • madotara69

    madotara69

    12 years ago

    Quoting 'Freya13' Have you been reading my mind?I have been thinking about the word hope.I am not sure if it is a positive word or a cruel word,maybe it depends on the context.Still thinking. It is what you did not say for the question, that has returned with reply. That is what I read within a person.It seems to be, some may feel you are a trusted ear. A place like this will be the ladder for some going through the mending process. You know that miss Freya, I'm saying I think I know you.Mado