M66
Why aren't Men getting Results...???
June 13 2014
Comments
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MsJonesy
11 years ago
It's the arse or is it the legs?
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RHP User
11 years ago
You have been very active on the forums, which does increase your audience, AND you can string a sentence together, which is a major plus. You have a face pic up. Always a bonus. And I assume your messages are as well constructed as your forums posts, and not just "Hey" or "I like your profile" or "Wanna fuck?". Plus, the women you are contacting are no doubt more mature with better manners than ones that other men may be contacting. Or maybe you're just lucky!
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RHP User
11 years ago
I would say that you are probably contacting ladies whose profiles you have read. You probably read their age preferences, stick to within a reasonable distance from yourself so that they actually do have a chance of meeting you. As MsElle said you probably also send respectful messages and not the usual drivel that makes up a big percentage of my messages. Keep up the good work ;)
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RHP User
11 years ago
It's not what you HAVE that makes the difference.... It's what the others DON'T HAVE that makes the difference... :) - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Kudos to you Openly1! Internet high five your way! I am one of the ones you're referring to as having little luck.As you say lookingforquality, I felt my messages showed that at least I:Read their profile, were in reasonable distance, as well as age range, and showed that I can string a sentence together. Perhaps I'm just not creative enough when breaking the ice :)Having said that, I had a lovely chat with a lady well into the night yesterday. Perhaps things have taken a turn for the better. Any advice would be most appreciated!
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Quoting 'looking4quality' I would say that you are probably contacting ladies whose profiles you have read. You probably read their age preferences, stick to within a reasonable distance from yourself so that they actually do have a chance of meeting you. As MsElle said you probably also send respectful messages and not the usual drivel that makes up a big percentage of my messages. Keep up the good work ;) Then you should try writing something a little more sensible
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RHP User
11 years ago
*a big percentage of the messages I receive* There, is that better? :-)
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have met some fantastic people on rhp, not always sexual, coffee, games as in the 80, s table top version's ☺ perseverance and above all honesty, is the key I'm not everybody's piece of cake but in time you really do meet up and find the click, it really is not a " fuck on demand " site , etiquette is a must - unless you really do find the " demand " all the best in your quest hang in there. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Thank you very much... I wouldn't have thought of any of those things mentioned especially Ms Kissk and her lovely 'Arse' comment... It doesn't really appeal to me, but then it doesn't have to... Does it, my dear? I don't have to look at it... LOL. A couple are from other Capitals, but I do get to visit the major cities from time to time and have said so... And yes I do stick to the age preferences and also read the profiles, so I know that I may be what they're looking for... Very enlightening... Thank you Again. I appreciate the comments.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I'm fat lol
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guykinkster
11 years ago
The other thing I've found in the past is that if you put a lot into your written profile sections about yourself and who you're looking for, you come across a lot better than the classic 'I'm not sure what to write but I'll come back later to fill it in'. If you're also honest and tell your potential sexual partners enough to be able to judge if they'll be interested in you, that also helps. I agree that you also need to be able to string a sentence together in both profile and messages, be polite, maybe a little cheeky and fun, but not crass or just plain offensive. I think you need to be kind of bold, confident and honest, be prepare to put yourself out there a bit and have some interesting ideas if the girl wants to chat or meet. Just my experience and suggestions. Have fun everyone!!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Yes I have been in contact with a few woman, chats last for a while then it just stops. I have not had 1 woman send me a message or a flirt. I am not a full paid member as I want to see how fake this site is. I have sent a few flirts out that only say nnice things not derogatory in any way. Well I will see what happens over next two weeks if no good im gone - Posted from rhpmobile
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gazpacho
11 years ago
You know how you see some blokes at social gatherings that always seem to get attention? Some of them may even seem to you to be real jerks, face like a smashed pie... or whatever, whereas other blokes getting all the attention, you can just appreciate why they're popular... anyway, point is, whatever it is they've got going for them, it makes them seem happy and confident and less needy than others, but most of all, I reckon smiling people get dates. Hugs Gazpacho - Posted from rhpmobile
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
It's all in the smile and positive attitude. At the end of the day...Like attracts like. Foxy
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Antzy
11 years ago
I think it has a lot to do with making an effort, reading a persons profile, what they are looking for and age criteria. If a person messages you and you're out of their age bracket or looking for something different to what they are looking for, well you will probably not get a response.
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have found most success in the 20 something age bracket. Having said that, I am not placing any more effort on any particular age group. It just seems to work. I would suggest OP, if what you have done so far hasnt worked, try a different approach. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
seem to me that you are respectful, sincere open and honest, and putting your words together that have some meaning and not being a total drop kick and asking for a fuck in the 1st three lines. You appear to also up front and honest and that is a nice change as well. Ticking the boxes - it would appear as well. Don't have to be "brad Pitt looks, 8 inch cock - it is behind the words and the person themselves that can be appealing. Good luck and hope you still get the messages by the bucket load. Get to meet and have fun.
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RHP User
11 years ago
You will continue to have good luck on RHP because you have a fabulous, no BS profile.You are articulate and always come across in your posts as being a decent, thoughtful human being which is the type of gentleman that most ladies on RHP would like to meet.Pity you don't live in Melb!Hugs to you.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'sir_stir' It's not what you HAVE that makes the difference.... It's what the others DON'T HAVE that makes the difference... :) - Posted from rhpmobile Exactly!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'MsElle72' You have been very active on the forums, which does increase your audience, AND you can string a sentence together, which is a major plus.... Or maybe you're just lucky! I've always been a firm believer that you make your own luck.... I was on RHP a few months with very little luck, when just through curiosity I found the forums, probably just a few weeks before you, Openly.Really – what a turn around! You can learn so much from the collective experience of the regular posters. It's golden advice AND IT'S FREE!Seriously though, it's all about attitude – confidence and pride in yourself and a friendly easy going outlook. Yes, you have to sell yourself a bit, but be honest – no bullshit and you'll continue do well. Good Work!Rocky
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'meistraviam' Yes I have been in contact with a few woman, chats last for a while then it just stops. I have not had 1 woman send me a message or a flirt. I am not a full paid member as I want to see how fake this site is. I have sent a few flirts out that only say nnice things not derogatory in any way. Well I will see what happens over next two weeks if no good im gone - Posted from rhpmobile Hi "Meistraviam". I assume being a non-member, you can't send messages, only Flirts. This is important, I think because a Flirt says nothing about you. I rarely use them because a prospective friend, meet or encounter partner wants to know who you are and see what you're about. If you can, I'd suggest that you invest in the ability to send messages and 'TALK' to people, so they know that you're serious, take them seriously and you're making an effort to make real contact rather than a quick pre-written "Business Card"... Thanks for all the all the comments, advice etc. I think I now have the answers to why some blokes just don't get much in the way of responses or initial contact. One thing... I noticed one or two posts, giving the impression that they thought I was asking how to get noticed... My post was about the opposite... I wanted to know why I WAS doing well... I suppose that's a good example of people not READING first... (Please, I am not pointing the bone or trying to show anyone up... Just confirming a point that was made earlier about reading people's profiles and taking in what they want and are looking for... Before you write.) Again, Ladies and Gents... Thanks for the insights. I have a much better understanding and now know why I am fortunate enough to have made many contacts and have (now 6) ladies who I'm speaking with and hoping to meet when the time is right and both are ready... Hi "wpbbwp"... That's very nice of you... I wish I was in Melbourne too, or you were on the Central Coast or in Sydney... It really is so very nice when people express even the slightest interest, for whatever reason. Not that one needs 'validation' or confidence. I do OK there. But we all need to be falttered now and then... So Thank you so much.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Also to "Meistraviam"... Hi mate, again... You mention your wanting to see how 'Fake' the site is... I know there are 'fake' profiles and people pretending to be what they're not. Beats me what their game is. Too much time on their hands and probably some sort of psychotic condition, I imagine... But I can tell you that I have spoken to a couple on the phone after talking online for a couple of weeks and I can assure you that there are genuine people on here wanting all sorts of friendship, company and relationships... Including the type I'm ultimately looking for. But I'm in no hurry and would love to meet some lovely people on the way there. And also, having been a long time between drinks... LOL, I wouldn't say no to a mutually enjoyable night together with someone who is into me and vice versa. I am sure that, as I said, if you invest in a Premium membership so you can send (5 messages a day), and write the sort of things that ladies want to know and hear... You'll get a result. It would be a shame for you to chuck it in without giving it a go as more than a 'Guest'... IMO Ladies can afford to be Guests, but men I think, have to be able to message them so they can reply. All the best, mate
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RHP User
11 years ago
I'm pretty sure RHP is a reflection of the way it's always been. The approach is largely a man's job, here and in the real world, and first impressions count for everything, whether representative or not. In both scenarios there's going to be the odd brush-off without any pleasantries, and if you're getting mostly brush-offs you need to look at what you're doing wrong. Unless you're just a dickhead who walks up to women in bars and says "wanna fuck" (although I've heard stories of that working too. A friend of mine went to the toilet at a party and the guy she'd been chatting to walked in on her with his pants around his ankles and his schlong saluting the ceiling fan. She reckons she was about to scream at him, then thought what the hell and went for it). I guess the difference in both cases is confidence, respect, humour, and maybe a face pic. I'm working on the three out of four ain't bad theory.
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RHP User
11 years ago
If you're a man and you don't have a paid membership you're not going to get anywhere. Most women aren't paid members so can't contact even if they wanted to, and those that are, even if by some miracle they come across your profile in the haystack, are just going to think you're a cheapskate.
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RHP User
11 years ago
+1 for being a paid member, it's certainly made the RHP experience better.You can't really communicate a cheeky sense of humour through flirts :) My apologies Openly1 I feel I have misinterpreted your post & intentions.Best of luck with your new lady friends :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Rick_Blaine' If you're a man and you don't have a paid membership you're not going to get anywhere. Most women aren't paid members so can't contact even if they wanted to, and those that are, even if by some miracle they come across your profile in the haystack, are just going to think you're a cheapskate. My advice, exactly to a young fella who is going to chuck it in if things don't improve... But he's not a member and is using Flirts... How can the Ladies respond if they aren't members and also, if they are, a Flirt is not a very intimate or imaginative way to introduce yourself... Respect!!! Gentlemen... We're dealing with a group of humans who don't think the way we do... They are VERY CEREBRAL and you must be too (even if you're just after, fanny)... Respect and putting yourself in a Ladies shoes (not a reference to transvestitism). It's a reference to EMPATHY... But maybe this knowledge comes with experience... or maybe age????
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Seachange
11 years ago
Quoting 'meistraviam' Yes I have been in contact with a few woman, chats last for a while then it just stops. I have not had 1 woman send me a message or a flirt. I am not a full paid member as I want to see how fake this site is. I have sent a few flirts out that only say nnice things not derogatory in any way. Well I will see what happens over next two weeks if no good im gone - Posted from rhpmobile Not many women respond to flirts. messaging is more effective as it just shows that men are more serious in making a connection rather than the flippant flirts. Good luck.
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Circe
11 years ago
You get out what you put in. If you invest time and energy and some level of intelligence then you'll do pretty well. Most of the guys who I have met are having a ball on here. Most don't do the forums but send polite, personal, targeted messages to women whose criteria they fit. One guy I met said half of the women who had opened messages from him responded and struck up a conversation. So say you send 20 in a week, 10 are opened, five of them respond, one or two will meet up- I think that's not too bad generally- one date per week?
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RHP User
11 years ago
I hadn't intended on replying to this thread and my response is broad not designed to man bash but an observed opinion from someone who has been here a little while been a paid member including being proactive in seeking friends. Unrealistic Expectations **I paid for membership so that entitles me to free sex doesn't it? Some men here I think treat their approach how they must have treated their former partners and therefore it shows in their singledom and why they stay that way. I can offer as many women here can examples of conversations from men who seem to think that a free intimate hook up in their favor and time restraints is all that matters. The fifo guy who sends you pics of his most treasured bodily part without any prompting or intimate chat in the hope you will see it and fall in love with it as he does. Who advises you that when he returns to town his priority will be his children and you are the one he wants to catch up with on his terms with no offer of a tempting experience at all! The man that speaks to you as if you were an iliterate fool ask me wat ya wanna know? Seriously I want to know why you think I would want to know? The man who does approach you in a well mannered way and all seems good then wants to meet only day times..........hmmmm?.......and then says what about Sunday morning which I cant do and he says oh well Cya. I love the one lets meets today I am at Blah Blah, I actually think a few guys do share one paid profile and when they travel try to organise hook ups as their location doesnt match nor do the private details. ** Another thing guys do is look for women outside of what they could seriously attain, the 40+ guy who figures I want that sexy model type 30 yr old ....that guy usually hasn't looked in the mirror realistically. ** Confidence (as Gazza says) some men exude a certain confidence control approach and will do well. Approach is good as is patience I have had some respectful responses mainly from men in their early thirties the younger are too brash the older so bitter and seeking self satisfaction. The one thing I detest is a man who within moments of meeting the conversation turns to putting down his ex and groups all women as #*#* it shows me his true self. I am not talking about listening and sharing on lifes woes just out and out bitterness. I myself if am interested actually prefer to meet soon as possible, I think many people can get caught up in the false persona of emails and txts. Once I received on a vanilla site the most interesting txt messages and response from a man, we spoke on the phone and the conversation was halted but the same we met and it was not for me. People can surprise you and its lovely to take a chance meet someone and as Lady T taught me if it isn't so in the first 10 minutes let them know and go. Oh and Openly 4-6 women chatting to no no playing there. Have fun is what it should be and above all respect. Treat people how you would like to be treated. Of course the narcicists and sociopaths can't. Signing off waiting for the paddle Cest La Vie
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Openly1' Thanks for all the all the comments, advice etc. I think I now have the answers to why some blokes just don't get much in the way of responses or initial contact. One thing... I noticed one or two posts, giving the impression that they thought I was asking how to get noticed... My post was about the opposite... I wanted to know why I WAS doing well... I suppose that's a good example of people not READING first... (Please, I am not pointing the bone or trying to show anyone up... Just confirming a point that was made earlier about reading people's profiles and taking in what they want and are looking for... Before you write.) I noticed this and I see it all the time in the messages I receive (and on the forums....to me it's just good forum etiquette to read a topic properly before jumping in with your opinion). It's an important thing that too many overlook, and after all if I can tell that somebody hasn't bothered to read my profile before messaging me then why would I be bothered to reply to them
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'modest84' +1 for being a paid member, it's certainly made the RHP experience better.You can't really communicate a cheeky sense of humour through flirts :) My apologies Openly1 I feel I have misinterpreted your post & intentions.Best of luck with your new lady friends :) Not a problem mate... I, of all people, am not perfect and don't profess to be... Think nothing of it... Hi Cest_La_Vie... You'll get no paddle from me... LOL. I DO 'respect' as much, if not more than I expect to be. If on any occasion I may have seemed to lack in that way... It would certainly have been unintentional and regretted. Not perfect, but I am, like all, a work in progress... Interesting comments, ALL... Thank you. I do have a greater insight now.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Luckdragon23' if I can tell that somebody hasn't bothered to read my profile before messaging me then why would I be bothered to reply to them The standard question I get is "what are you looking for?". Well if you had read my profile, you would know exactly what I am looking for!! And another thing that baffles me. Today alone I have received two flirts saying "I think you are hot, what do you think of me?". Both profiles only had photos in the private gallery. Therefore, obviously I think you are an idiot.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Cest_la_viebaby' The one thing I detest is a man who within moments of meeting the conversation turns to putting down his ex and groups all women as #*#* it shows me his true self. do the anti-woman rant in their profile, and I just can't understand it. Do they think that the women reading it will want to meet them and sleep with them just to prove them wrong? And yes I know there are women who have anti-male rants in their profiles and it applies to them as well. If you're that bitter and jaded then take a break; people aren't going to contact or respond to you when they can clearly see that they will probably be subjected to a bitch and moan fest about all women being selfish bitches, or all men being lying assholes.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Luckdragon23'some men do the anti-woman rant in their profile, and I just can't understand it. Do they think that the women reading it will want to meet them and sleep with them just to prove them wrong? Just saw this on a current poster's profile: "I'm looking for no-strings attached fun with people who seek the same. SIDEBAR: For all those ladies who are barking out orders and demands in your profiles........pull your heads in, please. It makes you even more unattractive." I'm just dying to meet someone with such a positive attitude!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Quoting 'Luckdragon23'some men do the anti-woman rant in their profile, and I just can't understand it. Do they think that the women reading it will want to meet them and sleep with them just to prove them wrong? Just saw this on a current poster's profile: "I'm looking for no-strings attached fun with people who seek the same. SIDEBAR: For all those ladies who are barking out orders and demands in your profiles........pull your heads in, please. It makes you even more unattractive." I'm just dying to meet someone with such a positive attitude! This so funny. How in the of all that's wonderful, is a man expecting to get a meeting, let alone 'some beautiful loving' if he starts his spiel off with the very thing he is 'miffed' about... 'Barking orders' and 'Demanding certain behaviors'...??? Beat the shit outa me... LOL
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RHP User
10 years ago
Thank you all for the advice here, reading the comments has opened my eyes too from others experiences as what to expect here and what to do for the future. :) I also believe it's a numbers game when it comes courting. Guess us single males have to persevere and also be active on the forums. P.S. I've always loved the sense of humour the maturer crowd have!
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RHP User
10 years ago
I think some men have just to understand it is not easy to chose........yes we want sex and no we dont want a relationship as such.....still we want a bit of flirting and courting....that just the fun of it......our makeup and my desire to feel wanted....and not just used. The cold approach lets fuck sounds they need a hooker but don't want to pay for it.......and most women detest it. I take weeks or month to say yes sometimes....its not I am not horny its just I want a man in my bed who I think will give me pleasure in sex and person......so I rather wait and see how it turns out. Oh I can totally fuck it up in the time I chat. Just the other week....oh god I was on a high with this one.....and then I totally totally fucked it up.....can happen.:(, so I will never meet him in person. I am not really interested in a one night stand I would like a bit more say weeks?????? when possible.....it just turns me on to see this person again.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Litonya' Oh I can totally fuck it up in the time I chat. Just the other week....oh god I was on a high with this one.....and then I totally totally fucked it up.....can happen.:(, so I will never meet him in person. Litonya I know what you mean and how you feel I too have fucked it up, it hurts but we can only blame ourselves. I think it's important not to give up. It's funny how sometimes people just appear when you least expect them. I mean it's easy to try too hard and by doing so cut your chances down. At least you have the women to men ratio in your favour
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