M51 F39

Words or melodies?

February 12 2021

Just pontificating about how difficult it is, for me at least, to communicate effectively in the one dimension that is the web of all things. My comprehension of the English language is likely above average although I know it was much better when I was younger. But conveying meaning and feeling by just the written word is stupendously difficult, this is why great writers are held in such esteem. I am pathetically hopeless at other languages even though I’ve spent a number of years in places with little to no English. My finesse in English has waned due to spending more and more time with people who don’t have English as their first language and also those that were not afforded the education I was. This brings me to what I sense most strongly in conversations. It is not the words said but how they are said. I listen more to the tones, the emphasis, I’d even say the musicality of what is said. I adore music and I can play out the parts of different instruments to songs I love in my head but could not give you more than 30% of the lyrics to my favourite tunes. If a song is re-recorded slightly differently I will either wince in pain or get all shivery at how inspiring the change is. In personal conversations I seem to understand exactly what the conversation meant without really remembering what was said. I spend 12 months on an island where only around 10 people spoke English, I didn’t learn much of the local language but got by exceedingly well. Interestingly enough the elders of the island soon worked out what any newcomer to the island was about, they didn’t need to know what was said, they could judge on how the person held themselves. I guess I’m one of those Meyer-Briggs touchy feely types which is quite funny as my occupation is highly analytical. In forums (here and in other areas) I will often butt heads with people who I essentially share the same belief systems with and I wonder if it’s just the meaning of interaction is lost with only words to communicate with. Sexually I love to fantasise and Mrs S and I will often get all hot and bothered talking about our desires but when I’m making love I am very quiet, I’m focused on the touch, the smells, the sounds oh and of course the vision. Most often I will orgasm in quiet bliss as well but sometimes when the intensity is next level I will let out a euphony of incomprehensible sounds to the delight of my love. Right, so if I haven’t bored you shitless and you’re still reading I would love to hear what is the main components of communication that others focus on? Do you know all the words to songs or are you too busy focusing on the sound of fingers sliding upon a fretboard? Also would be interesting to see how you find online communication and if there’s any distinct differences between camps? Gee I’m sounding like a University of Sydney researcher now 😂

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RHP User

4 years ago

This combined with the many MANY comments you have made on these forums that regularly offend, suggest you are more than a little conceited. Maybe take a break for awhile ✌🏻

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SpicyKale

4 years ago

Sounds like the context of a book you’re researching? One of my uni lectures used to tell me to take a deep breath, walk away and come back to it with less emotion and fresh eyes at a later date 🤷🏻‍♂️

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RHP User

4 years ago

I feel asleep somewhere in the middle of the second paragraph. Came back for another try but am left wondering why someone who claims to have better than average literacy skills, would end a sentence with a preposition. More than one sentence.

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RHP User

4 years ago

Scholarly sources and studies on communication since the 1960 ties state and 70 to 93 % of all communication is non verbal. Which is why online communication is a rife source of misunderstandings

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The_Antichrist

4 years ago

I just dump my words out there....sometimes it’s like a wrecking ball because there’s truth in it, sometimes it’s because I’ve misinterpreted what the other was saying and I didn’t bother asking questions to seek clarity... Then there are times when it’s funny ... which is mostly what I like to focus on. I enjoy making people smile or laugh and if I can extract that out of someone, I’m a happy little vegemite. I also found your comment about the Sydney uni thing rather amusing by the way. Much like the dig at that disclaimer thing I have in my profile, I don’t see it as a statement of a conceited prick.

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Phoenix_Rising

4 years ago

I listen to the words and the melody, something you can’t do when you only have the written word to go by. There’s plenty of other cues you can take from one’s writings but nothing quite so helpful as the visual display someone puts on during a face to face conversation. Overuse of language and or grammatical skills often seems to appear quite condescending, much like when someone is physically overbearing I just don’t want to be around it, I love love love a good conversation but the moment I sense someone’s using language to showboat or manipulate it becomes a massive turn off for me. Language has the potential to be so very powerful but it can be quite hard to use only one part of a language (the written word) to communicate efficiently sometimes.

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MsSuperFoxy

4 years ago

When I'm face to face communicationing, I have started look at the whites (sclera) of people's eyes. They are very readable! More readable than we think. You can see a lot of things like, social cues, a person's emotional state, sicknesses, feelings, if they are lying/being honest, etc. It's so interesting! I've been reading up about how lawyers use the whites of eyes when a person gives evidence. Unlike written communication and on line, the readers eyes just focus on the written form infront if them and that's it. There is no cues from the person who wrote it. Unless emjoi's are used So therefore the reader just goes on what is in front of them. Not sure if I have answered your post questions tho. 🤷‍♀️ Ms Foxy

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FIFOFappucino

4 years ago

this could get long and complicated, but the short of it being, i love language, hte subtleties of accents, music and rhymes, i often think and speak in melodic tones, it just depends what kind of mood im in. but i also enjoy the quiet too, hearing heartbeats, white noise, humming of equipment, a cats purr... online i can tend to rhyme a lot and spit out a lot of one liners, maybe my mind thinks differently ont he keyboard as opposed to being in person where youa re constantly reading facial and social queues and adjusting yourself to suit anyway, definitely a very interesting topic for discussion and yes, good smells are lovely...just please, no 'fragrance' cologne etc...douse yourself in essential oils instead ;)

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