F61
fuck buddies reappearing after long absence
November 11 2015
Comments
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Missb4u
9 years ago
1. Yes I have 2. I was polite but not inviting him over 3. No I didn't as it just didn't feel right. This one disappeared with no explanation and had already been given a couple of chances. So in typical Scorpio style, he was then dead to me and I moved on. However There is one guy that is not a fb that keeps appearing and then disappears with really no explanation. I'm completely at a loss as to what to do with him. He is such a sweet talker. Time will tell I guess as I'm a firm believer actions will always speak louder then words.
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RHP User
9 years ago
I had one particular FB that became a FWB and was long term. We totally rocked each others world for a while and then decided to move on as we both knew it could not become a real relationship. We couldnt stop being friends so decided to be there for each other through our various relationship attempts and fuck ups with other people haha I finally..(as in within the last month) got over any feelings or desires for this guy and he calls me up more flirty than usual and wants to fool around for a bit. He was not in a relationship any longer. As much as my body wanted to...cause we were amazing together, I could not do it! I knew it would just catapult me back in, and I am finally ok being out. Does that make sense? It has been over a year since we last fucked and I felt a year is long enough to not go back! I wanted to though...brain won over body this time!
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RHP User
9 years ago
Actions do indeed speak louder than words and i learnt not to waste my time again after a no show. Way back in the year i had a former buddy who i used to hook up with often, beg and plead for me to see him again, sent shit loads of messages, i eventually gave in, guess what, he didn't show lol 2nd time in a row haha but no shows are different, what i mean here are just the ones who you haven't heard from for a while and that while stretches out and gets longer and when you know the sex is always going to be amazing. These few i'm referring to, i'd be happy to let their actions do the talking lol - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
I just wrote regarding this but the post failed. It was 3.5yrs ago we met, it lasted a few months before I ended it as I just couldnt handle the casual relationship. He always kept in contact and we decided to see each other again a few months ago. Once again I ended it as I still had feelings for him and the casual arrangement just had a negative impact on my life. Ive had fb for long periods of time and it always worked well. As there were never any expectations or feelings for more on both sides. There are just people you meet and they end up meaning more to you than you expected. Im trying to move forward once again but I know he wont be able to refrain from contacting me again. Which makes it hard for me and frustrates me because he wants the connection on a sexual level but he is unable to make it into something real.
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RHP User
9 years ago
I hear you sista!!
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RHP User
9 years ago
Then no. Theres no point, he obviously wasnt that interested, and it just makes me think hes having a dry spell and thinks, Oh, Ill call up so and so. And what is with the guys who message you relentlessly til you give in and say , ok, lets meet. and then they dont show?
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RHP User
9 years ago
I've been guilty off disappearing before due to personal reasons. It really isn't the best way of leaving things especially being that we were friends for awhile and got along really well ........ Some time passed I sorted my crap out and made contact to fix what I messed up. but not to get in her pants... I took her out to dinner as a apology and now we are friends ! If your planning on stopping things take the time to explain why ... Saves so much tension and hate 👌 My 2c matt~ - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'Kokoflamingo' Then no. Theres no point, he obviously wasnt that interested, and it just makes me think hes having a dry spell and thinks, Oh, Ill call up so and so. And what is with the guys who message you relentlessly til you give in and say , ok, lets meet. and then they dont show? Exactly!! WTF is with guys who do that?!I've had 3 that have done that to me yet I have never done anything to mess them around.It's nothing more than a game to them.I've learned to just say thanks but no thanks as soon as they try to reconnect with me. It's just not worth the trouble.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'tangokittie' I had one particular FB that became a FWB and was long term. We totally rocked each others world for a while and then decided to move on as we both knew it could not become a real relationship. We couldnt stop being friends so decided to be there for each other through our various relationship attempts and fuck ups with other people haha I finally..(as in within the last month) got over any feelings or desires for this guy and he calls me up more flirty than usual and wants to fool around for a bit. He was not in a relationship any longer. As much as my body wanted to...cause we were amazing together, I could not do it! I knew it would just catapult me back in, and I am finally ok being out. Does that make sense? It has been over a year since we last fucked and I felt a year is long enough to not go back! I wanted to though...brain won over body this time! I'm always proud of myself too when my "brain wins over my body" and believe me you won't be sorry you did that because, as you say, when you're finally ok being out, you need to stay out. This is what I have experienced too so yes it all makes sense.
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RHP User
9 years ago
1) Have you had a call or contact from a previous buddy who mattered to you after a long delay? Yes, quite a few woman that I have been interested in come back at some point, might be months, or years even sometimes 5 or 6 years. We date for a few months and one of us ends it. Then somehow it usually rekindles, typically after they have had a few relationships, and see that I'm not a clingy guy. They are happy to return. 2) How did you feel about hearing from them again and what was your response? Depends on how it ended, if it was just gradual I don't mind but if I had feelings and she ended it, I would see her but I wouldn't invest in it emotionally. Always happy to see an old flame though. 3)How did it play out, meaning did you meet them again, and how was it? Further to that, was it then just a once of on that occasion or did you then continue to see them? It usually plays out exactly the same as it did the first time around. I find when a woman comes back, she has re-considered me as "boyfriend material" and is searching for someone, you can tell by a bit of social media research to see she probably just broke up with someone. If she left me, I won't invest emotionally but I will see her happily, if I left her, I will consider it emotionally. I recently dated a girl I was seriously dating last year who I thought I ended it with. This time around she left me and it left a bitter taste in my mouth, I fell for her this time when I didn't fall for her last year. I think people return to fuck buddies because they know what to expect, it's comfort and we as humans are creatures of comfort and familiarity so I don't understand people who date someone for a few weeks and if it doesn't work out never see them again and cut them out completely. Then there is the other extreme...the people who only return to a few different exs.
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MsJonesy
9 years ago
Quoting 'vampavibe' Quoting 'Kokoflamingo' Then no. Theres no point, he obviously wasnt that interested, and it just makes me think hes having a dry spell and thinks, Oh, Ill call up so and so. And what is with the guys who message you relentlessly til you give in and say , ok, lets meet. and then they dont show? Exactly!! WTF is with guys who do that?!I've had 3 that have done that to me yet I have never done anything to mess them around.It's nothing more than a game to them.I've learned to just say thanks but no thanks as soon as they try to reconnect with me. It's just not worth the trouble. They in all likelihood have no intention of ever meeting. You have just met some members of the sub species named Thrillus of Chaseus. Meeting is never their end game. Winning you over is. Did you indulge in some sexy chat? Exchange pics...which may have gotten a more risque as the contact continued? Got a bit squirmy in your seat? So did they; and completed their end game - getting off without a meet and greet.
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sweetgem
9 years ago
1) Have you had a call or contact from a previous buddy who mattered to you after a long delay? * Yes I had one and once. He was one of the three amazing gentlemen I met in my early days on RHP. He went overseas and I didn't hear from him for almost a year and then one day, I received a text message from him on my phone. 2) How did you feel about hearing from them again and what was your response? * I was surprised to have heard from this man again after nearly a year gone and I thought I would not hear from him again. So, my response was "oh wow, he still keeps my number?" Lol but I didn't tell him my real thought when I replied to his text and when we caught up for a dinner. 3) How did it play out, meaning did you meet them again, and how was it? Further to that, was it then just a once of on that occasion or did you then continue to see them? * Yes, he came to pick me up after work one evening and we went to have dinner together. We had a good chat just about anything, but nothing intimate happened that night. So we made plans to meet again, but the timing was not aligning for us and we didn't meet again after that night. We have lost contact again since! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
Some great posts, thanks and certainly agree with the wtf reaction when they beg and plead and then don't show. I'm not actually referring to buddies where feelings or thoughts of a relationship have come into it, nor a dating scenario purely hook up sex. Granted for all of us i'm sure, there are feelings to some degree. The guys i was referring to are all a lot younger so never any thought of a relationship, all in their 20's actually, sorry no one in his 30's, but i miss the sex. It's so good when you get a call from someone you've already been with, especially when they fall into your top 6 lol there are others who i would never go back for, even though the sex was good, i don't feel i would want to see them again. But these few, i swear i wouldn't hesitate because i know they know how to work me and how to satisfy me. I just get tired of trying to line up the planets with new guys sigh - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
that these things are more complicated when feelings are potentially growing and a few of you commented about making the decision not to go back, I think in that situation, you made the right decision because going back like you say, just drags you back into the same situation. So I should have clarified in my initial post that I meant sex. Have you had sex that was so good, and the guy really did it for you (but without feeling like you were 'too' into them), so much so that time just wouldn't matter, you know the sex would be amazing. Koko it's interesting you say after 2 weeks, my experience has been different in the sense that they're kind of random, fast, off quickly in the car somewhere, you know, not bragging but not a pre-arranged night together, if you know what I mean, and some of these guys would call me randomly about once a month, which was fine with me, I loved it because I had a few on the go, and 2 of them would have me drop what I was doing and run, usually into the shower, one would say he'd be there in 15 minutes, but that was bizarre. He turned me on so much, and he knew it, even if I was with another guy (thank god that never played out) but I would have made an excuse and gone to meet the other guy, he's so bloody hot and full on horny. And another the same, amazing with his tongue, and so tender, really different but an awesome lover, he worked me in a different way but pressed all the right buttons, I'd be driving get a call and it would be when? Nothing else needed to be said, are you horny, do you wanna meet, usually just what time haha so I miss those guys, one lives close here and It's hard because you know, going through all the time involved with new guys, I'd take time with my former buddies like I said, in a hot second, no questions asked. It'd be the same, when?
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RHP User
9 years ago
Only one man that I would want to come back...he was an amazing lover and we saw each other on a casual basis for nearly three years but I ended it for good reasons and I doubt that things have changed xxFreya
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RHP User
9 years ago
Great album and lead track some would say a self titled one. Never go back!!
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RHP User
9 years ago
Very apt song by The cruel sea. Love it.Great album.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Hi there, nice topic, i thinks it's up to your better judgement whether or not you go back and question your needs/wants/morals etc, I love to be spontaneous all the time, but I wouldn't re-visit an old FB, even if they were really good, there was an obvious reason you or they moved on!
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RHP User
9 years ago
You can't make love to me, This ain't gonna be your gig no more Ain't the way it's gonna be ... Fave verse that 1 . First verse good 2 though...
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RHP User
9 years ago
I found mine here. I bumped into a old lover/fuck buddy here.i was blown away. Distance of my move slowed down our hot times and we moved on i guess. Slowed on meets first then eventually contact too. But this is all over ten or more years. So this catch up was omfg. - Posted from rhpmobile
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nibblemebi
9 years ago
But it was me that contacted. Happened upon his email address after 15 years. Amazingly he still kept it. Not much has changed, still delicious :)
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'nibblemebi' But it was me that contacted. Happened upon his email address after 15 years. Amazingly he still kept it. Not much has changed, still delicious :) and good for you for doing the contacting. Funny, I don't consider myself old fashioned but when it comes to contact, I wait for the guy to contact me, fear of rejection I suppose. I have been known to send out an SOS from the beach though, with a happy ending lol Well, I'm with you though, some guys just don't have an off day, they're always great, sounds like your guy after 15 years is still just as good, and for me, when it's just sex, I wouldn't hesitate. No relationship or feelings beyond just liking them and loving hot encounters with them, but for me and with these particular individuals, it's the hard and fast encounters, in the car, over the bonnet lol whatever, but not dating. Thanks for sharing
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