F56
opinions please!!!!!
March 19 2014
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
He doesn't sound nice PrettyinPurple. Leave him immediately and find yourself a good respectful man who knows how to give you want you need.
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RHP User
11 years ago
So he can have his way but you can't? Things you say in you post he has said to you are not nice, and you deserve to be treated better, by him or someone else. Tell him he can kiss his FMF goodbye.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sounds a little one sided/ selfish to me. If you were going to concider venturing outside your relationship it should take into consideration both of your wishes not just his. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Smilingwithfun
11 years ago
Sounds like there needs to be some work done in the relationship. Is venturing outside the relationship a good idea when what's in the relationship isn't?
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RHP User
11 years ago
that most men I have encountered are very hypocritical when it comes to sex, they want you to take it up the arse but they won't, they want to have a threesome with another chick and want to watch you lick another girls snatch but wont have a threesome with another bloke and suck his cock. I don't get how they think they can ask that if they aren't prepared to do the same, then they treat you like you are a prude for not agreeing to do it!! I think you should steer well away from the subject for now if that is the response. Clearly your minds and relationship are not ready for such a thing.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Suggest a DP MMF that way you don't have to worry about sharing holes !! jokes aside find a couple then everyone is happy
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RHP User
11 years ago
OP, from what you describe your relationship needs a lot of work before a swinging adventure and then returning to a happy home life. Unless either or both of you see a polygamous adventure as testing the water to "trade up"What you may have overlooked is that someone has to swing with you and this will require the additional person/persons to be comfortable and at ease with you both. Sounds like any potential playmates might be getting into your marital wars. Fix things at home, one way or another, then try a sexual adventure, otherwise do not do anything.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Sounds like he's only interested in HIS fantasies... and that he views you as a possession instead of your pleasure as an "experience" in the context of your sexuality discussions. I think any exploration outside of your relationship are destined to see it fail. - Posted from rhpmobile
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madotara69
11 years ago
There is a difference. Mado Mado Tara xx
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Cheekyarses
11 years ago
Traum246 - Im in agreeance with you... It must be an even playing ground..
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RHP User
11 years ago
A snapshot of your marriage here OP,but from what you have said,and the fact that you are even here...BTW does he know that you are? .....indicates to me that perhaps you need some help in sorting out what appears to be some ,at the very least,inequities.xx Q
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RHP User
11 years ago
Watch more pornos go for anal ones they have more variety in them. As for swinging don't go there at this stage too much jealous ATM. Good luck just watch your movies get used to them first then join RHP as a couple and learn from here x
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Qefenta2' A snapshot of your marriage here OP,but from what you have said,and the fact that you are even here...BTW does he know that you are? .....indicates to me that perhaps you need some help in sorting out what appears to be some ,at the very least,inequities.xx Q Very little to go on here. To start with, take threesomes of any variety off the table, then sort out the rest of your relationship.
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sweetgem
11 years ago
If I were you, I would not seek anything extra sexually until I got my home situation sorted out. It doesn't matter whether you would venture alone or together with your hubby, problems must be sorted first and have your mind set clear before you start a new game! Perhaps ask yourself what you truly and ultimately want in a relationship, and see if you could pass up not having your curiosity or fantasy fulfilled. But whatever decision you make OP, please remember that professional helps are actually available for you out there if you ever needed any :-) Good luck and hope you would sort it out soon. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Tend to agree with virtually all of the above statements - its the fine line between fact and fantasy,once its been crossed could it or would it ever be the same (relationship wise ) after reading your post,me probably thinks not - but hey just my opinion,deep thoughts required me thinks. - Posted from rhpmobile
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Yesyoudo
11 years ago
Your man is a long way from any extra spice. Unless hey can be happy and entertain your desires as well you guys should just be vanilla. Otherwise big trouble awaits!!
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RHP User
11 years ago
You might open Pandora's box. I ask my husband if he wanted to come on here as a couple with me. He said yeah that sounds good so I saidwhat if you see me getting off with another guy, getting turned on and loving it more than I do with you? he saidforget it. He said he could not handle that. I know my husband would hand two women, I have arranged it for him but I found it uncomfortable to tell the truth. I have great MMF and FFM but never with my husband. he knows I am on RHP but we just keep this over in a small compartment of our lives.he is not on RHP as it does not interest him at all. so I guess if you want to do this, then lots of talk and sometimes what you wish for turns out that it does not work at all. what ever you do, you have to know the risk of stuffing up a relationship for your fantasy or his. I have seen it at swingers clubs where things unravel like an old jumper when people are all of a sudden confronted with something that was just a fantasy. think long and hard, this guy is not an arsehole he is just a guy saying how he feels. most men are very reluctant to have another guy in their wives pussy, it takes a very understanding male to deal with that. as for the bi sexual part, well you have to remember if your a male someone is sticking a cock in your mouth and arse if your with a guy and that's not an easy adjustment to a straight male. women can be a little bi flavoured just the kissing and touching, not to far out side the things we do normally in life. we are used to kissing other women and being tactile so its not a great leap to doing a little play time naked. its a huge leap for a straight male and something he would be very uncomfortable with. I would not say a guy is selfish if he cant make that leap. Or a woman for that matter. what ever you decide, just keep on talking and play little games like same room sex with a couple, soft options are just as effective.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Actually Mado has made a very important distinction. The hubby here didn't bring it up, so sorry I may have been a little hasty in the leave him advice. Sorry. So He isn't actually asking for a threesome. So I suppose he is saying he couldn't handle a MMF. Fair enough. Although saying he would "never root you again" Lordy he is a romantic isn't he. Lol. Rereading your question, it sounds like hubby isn't interested in perusing a threesomes and seems like you aren't really interested either. So what gives here? Why are you asking about swinging or threesomes??
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RHP User
11 years ago
Prettyinpurple needs some advice on spicing up the love life...but you need to maybe pop into swb or open up a little more. I have read your other forum and from what you say here your sex life at home isnt good. Maybe going to a couples club and watcing others have sex might be exciting....I sense someting is missing in your life/marraige.
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prettyinpurple45
11 years ago
Thank you all for your input...!!! ... most of you have hit the nail on the head... and no.. he doesn't know I am on here cheers
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sounds like Hubby is a Control Freak with a jealous streak . Even before any mention of 3-somes he would regularly tell you how he would like to fuck other Women . As DG said , he sees you as his Possession . I reckon , even in FFM , he would get jealous if he saw you cumming with another person(Woman). I think you guys need to sort out your Internal issues before entertaining any thought of bringing in other people & bringing in other people won't fix your Internal issues . There are many Women , your age , who have recently come out of long-term Marriages for the same reasons . He has you under his thumb and your Sex life is stale . I wonder how much he controls you in other aspects of your life ... GG♒️ - Posted from rhpmobile
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
To be honest I believe each and every one of us have a little vanilla inside of us. This is how I read your post... You brought up a MMF threesome...he replied - that he didn't like watching you with some one else and that you don't like doing it with him and he asked why with some other guy...What answer did you give? How did that make you feel when he said that??? Also from a mans' point of view when he is out and sees another woman and says "I could do her"..to me that's pretty normal for a man to SAY that...actioning it is another thing all together. How I see it is, men look all the time, just like we women do. There is nothing wrong with "looking". To say tho "he could never 'root me again' if anyone else ever went inside me", to me that says a lot about him, not you. So my question is...Is this just fantasies between the both of you or just you?? When I say fantasies, I mean just the talking/discussing fantasizing about a MMF. I believe there is a difference. Is this what YOU want to do with two others or with him and another man???? Foxy
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RHP User
11 years ago
"....you don't like doing it with me..." That does NOT sound good for your sex life, and it appears that maybe you are feeling a little horny because (maybe) you aren't getting any, or enough, at home... However, it is great that you have open lines of communication and can discuss your sex and your husband sounds like a guy who is open (albeit a little selfish in his thoughts)... Maybe you both need to play separately, but openly...?? S'nP
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RHP User
11 years ago
Your relationship isnt ready to add a 3rd party just yet. Sounds to me like your in the early stages of dipping your toe in the water. Allowing a 3rd person into your life can take some time. To do that you need to both be on the same page and be prepared to roll with whatever happens. It is only a big deal if either of you cant come to terms with it for what it is.. The idea of allowing a 3rd party into your life is for the excitement and something new. Look at it as giving.. giving your partner the ultimate gift.. Ive had the pleasure to be the invited on a few occassions with mixed reactions.. Some men love to see their lady getting pleasured and others dont. For the ones that dont, I sense it and wont proceed. For the ones that do.. life is great... but mentally they have it right... Cheers Jay
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RHP User
11 years ago
I think you should get sexy and fuck each other now and hard stoke the flames again he wants to fuck you not other girls only other girls when your not fucking him ! So fuck him you vanilla soft serve dont have to add another freezer to get get another flavour !! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Oh that's such a shame, he's clearly not appreciative of what he has... Perhaps a little jealousy would do him some good and remind him how desirable you are and how lucky he is; and that although you're a couple, you are still individuals who should be appreciated and supported to experience life to the fullest, in what ever way that may be!
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prettyinpurple45
11 years ago
food for thought! We are having a weekend away in the city for our wedding anniversary... Who knows.. might be able to spice it up a bit... but.. I am soo used to him saying stuff like "ohh she's hot, or 'ohhh I could do her" it's a male thing... I perve on cute guys if they pass me but I don't say stuff like he does... I have always told him to go get a girlfriend (to take the pressure off me).. but I think he is all talk and no action... would love to see if he actually goes ahead with it one day if a girl approached him.. IF one ever approached him... I just thought maybe a change would be good.. guess not huh??
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madotara69
11 years ago
To express their preferences to finding another woman to swing with (the elusive unicorn) generally to the idea, the lady of the couple is bi curious. I don't think men see their women getting off to another woman as a threat, more fantasy and thoughts of fucking them both is quite appealing, would be for any bloke fair enough. Women are passionate with sex, more so than men generally to the eye anyway I believe, in hindsight it's easy to say the guy is possessive and needs to experience some jealousy, needs to treat the woman better to her fantasy, get counselling, trouble with the relationship, all that jazz. There is a lot of trust for a man to share his wife/partner with another man, I don't believe there is anything wrong for the guy to feel uncomfortable, especially when he expresses that his woman is not showing him the sexual desire she may show while suggesting bringing another guy in to fuck her. We seem to be the minority in here, to the forums and through the profiles of couples we have had messages or flirts, to have preference to a man joining us for a threesome, though I could not be part to it if Tara was looking for something I was not giving her, I would be jealous and uncomfortable if she expressed it that way. She doesn't she does express the desire for us getting off together and we have spent years earning trust for each other, to not have possession issues, nor jealousy to less of each other to any competition or dissatisfaction, we are completely a team to this and best friends and that takes absolute trust and care. OP your guy is telling you he does not have that trust, why? only you know. Another woman he can see the safety to it, I believe. If you wish to experiment with swinging and mfm, with hubby, then you need to show him to be the man for the moment at all times, build that trust to not hurt him over an experimental idea, if he was to see you give yourself to another man with passion and something you had not given with him, it would bring problems that you may regret the whole experience, possibly haunt your relationship for time to come. Again only you know to the relationship between yourself and hubby, can you risk breaking his heart? You have to ask yourself do you love him, to care? Would you use his trust or insecurities to seek something apart from him to the experience? Could you trust yourself to not leave his connection with you during the fun? Fantasy is one thing, doing it is nothing the same for unsure reasons, with lack of communication to some feelings that will arise, it's risky business. It could become a fantastic experience for you both. Just care to it all, care to each other for a while. Let feelings speak and listen to them. You both have different emotions to those feelings and they need to be understood to the differences. Good luck, maybe something here helps a little. Mado Mado Tara xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'prettyinpurple45' I just thought maybe a change would be good.. guess not huh?? A change is fantastic, but only when you have something really stable to go home to. Otherwise, change the lot.Or, keep it unstable and stop searching.
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prettyinpurple45
11 years ago
thanks all :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
"and besides you don't like doing it with me so why would you want to do it with some other guy" This feeling hurts a man very deeply. If he feels this way and hasn't left you then he must love you very much. I suggest you reconnect with your sexuality and take that journey with him. Build an amazing sex life by trying everything outside the box you can think of together. When your sexual and non sexual relationships are in good health then think about introducing another party.
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RHP User
11 years ago
its a 2 way thing..has to be, or there will always be unanswered questions.... if he wants an ffm, then she should absolutely be able to ask for an mmf 3........ of course tho..only set off on one course or the other if you are 100% you both want to go there....and can handle it.
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