chevtrek

chevtrek

M60

relationships beyond 2000

July 31 2013

All around me or in the media you hear of divorce plus stats show more and more divorce. So the question is do you think that people take the meaning of 2 working as 1 for granted. Do both male and female now prefer to take the easy way out when there is a problem. Also do we take less attention to pleasing our partners be it in the bedroom or out. Your view.

Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Most people I know are divorced, thinking about divorce, thinking about separating, separated, or just unhappily in their marriage. Forget the old days when couples hung in forever, they're gone.Its the sign of the times. These days where so many couples are splitting ' no one is any longer the odd person out . Its much easier and much more accepted that separations will happen. and so they do.Not saying all are like that. Im sure there are the survivors that tolerate anything and everything .. Good for them...

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    I think people settle for less.. like marry the person just because it's the thing to do.. I don't know many people that hold out for the right person through fear that they wont come along.. Thats were your problem starts.. Sonja Xxx - Posted from rhpmobile

  • Mischeviouslad

    Mischeviouslad

    11 years ago

    Divorce rates are actually in decline, from their peak in 1976 after the passing of the Family Law Act the year before. If you believe that divorce around you is on the increase, it's likely because divorce after 20 years or more has risen..... which puts those people into chevtreks general age class... ... or in the class of his dates' parents ;-) lol- Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Meet George Jetson. His Boy Elroy. Daughter Judy. Jane his wife. Still married to this day me thinks...FOXY

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Quoting 'Mischeviouslad'Divorce rates are actually in decline, from their peak in 1976 after the passing of the Family Law Act the year before. If you believe that divorce around you is on the increase, it's likely because divorce after 20 years or more has risen..... which puts those people into chevtreks general age class... ... or in the class of his dates' parents ;-) lol- Posted from rhpmobile Nothing more needs to be said, post of the year lol

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Statistics are just that, never tell your children that they shouldn't be with someone - they will as sure as hell marry them!

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    who gives a rats how many times someone has been married, just an extension from how many partners someone has had, either short or long term.Not a biggie in my books

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Quoting 'mooka' Quoting 'Mischeviouslad'Divorce rates are actually in decline, from their peak in 1976 after the passing of the Family Law Act the year before. If you believe that divorce around you is on the increase, it's likely because divorce after 20 years or more has risen..... which puts those people into chevtreks general age class... ... or in the class of his dates' parents ;-) lol- Posted from rhpmobile Nothing more needs to be said, post of the year lol Agree!!!

  • Cheekyarses

    Cheekyarses

    11 years ago

    Would there be less divorces if more married couples opened up their marriage?? Just a thought x

  • Mr_MrsAraps

    Mr_MrsAraps

    11 years ago

    Would much rather people not suited to each other split up than be back in the 50's and 60's and be forced to live together from some pre conceived notion of society peer pressure. If I am happier separated then the only person that matters is me (and kids) ... so no, not really bothered on the statistics of it all which are IMHO irrelivent in comparison to peoples happiness.- Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    So what do I do?? Married 25 years together 34. I have suggested open marriage - went down like a tone of bricks - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Women have more options as well, often make more money than men as well. So they don't have to put up with anything any more. Luckily.Our culture is very much built on instant gratification. And we are teaching our kids that things come easily too... will be interesting to see what Gen X are like when they are older.Stats: Also marriages have been decreasing as well and people are getting married a little older than they were say 20 years ago. Other possibilities why the divorce rate may be decreasing DG. You smart arse! lol

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Did a bit of a googling and found a few articles on the rising number of divorces in Australia.I don't understand it. I was 100% certain I wanted to marry Mr. P and have made it my focus to literally wish (picture wishing on a star etc) that we would still be together and happy... 4 eva lol. We've been at our best together when trials raised their heads over the years. Literally, "for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, from this day forward until death do us part." We've worked together to make the best of our life together, for ourselves and our family, no taking anything for granted including health or wealth. The easiest way out was to work through it together. We still please each other in and out of the bedroom. :-DThat's us though and we're proud to be part of a shrinking statistic (scuse the pun!)

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    1. Women don't have to put with crap anymore, and have so many more options than 30 years ago...2. I cant see how anyone can say divorce is an easy way out!!! It comes with angst, tears, decision making, family upheaval, dramas with friends and family, often court or Solicitor stresses and expense, and that's after you've managed to get through the initial separation period! There is a lot of process and emotional turmoil attached with deciding to divorce, to me the easy way out would be to stay put, not rock the boat and stay unhappy to keep the peace!3. Marriage involves a hell of a lot more than just pleasing your partner!!

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Women did not have a support system. If there was a major problem in their marriage they could not just up and leave unless they had strong family members to take them in and assist. Or, were well off enough to support themselves. A women's refuge may have been the only place available for a battered/ abused wife to go to if her family could not help. Deserted wives pension schemes did not exist, or were not enough for her to support herself and young children. If the man left the family home, she would have been mostly without financial support. In this day and age, women are far more independent, financially better off and more resourceful in ways to help support themselves and their kids. Maybe the fact that divorce is so easy to get these days, should make marriage more difficult to enter.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    in the 18th century most people were dead by the age of forty.If you marry in your twenties,die in your 80s that means you could be together for sixty years.....I often wonder just who makes the compromises in long term marriages...... Why would one person ever be enough is probably the question to ask.People change,people grow ,some just stagnate....and why are there so many married people here looking for more?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    There seems to be quite a negative attitude towards long lasting marriages on this thread. Two examples being that 'there are the survivors that tolerate anything and everything' and 'I often wonder just who had to make the compromises in long term marriages?'. I just have to say that I wouldn't change my experience, I wanted to provide a stable home for me and mine and that's what I have. I don't imagine every marriage should or could survive to be long term but that's because I understand everyone's experience is different, something I expect the average RHPer would recognise considering the amount of different opinions offered in the forums on any topic under the sun. It occurs to me Cheekyarses and Freya that your questions would make for a great topic!

  • chevtrek

    chevtrek

    11 years ago

    As for good with the bad hell I don't expect anyone to put up with say a boozer, violent, gambler or a bludger. But I have heard some silly reasons for divorce and wounder why did you get married to start with. I feel divorce and marriage have become to easy but at the same time couples should not stay together because of the kids if the relationship is real bad.

  • madotara69

    madotara69

    11 years ago

    Quoting 'Jay_Me' Most people I know are divorced, thinking about divorce, thinking about separating, separated, or just unhappily in their marriage. Forget the old days when couples hung in forever, they're gone.Its the sign of the times. These days where so many couples are splitting ' no one is any longer the odd person out . Its much easier and much more accepted that separations will happen. and so they do.Not saying all are like that. Im sure there are the survivors that tolerate anything and everything .. Good for them...Today will be old tomorrowMado, Tara xx

  • ruby_blossum

    ruby_blossum

    11 years ago

    They want a divorce.The lawyer is amazed...he says to them both "but why now ? You have been together for 65 years?The elderly couple reply..."We had to wait for the kids to die".

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    The definition of happily married is she's happy and your married, lol. I am sure our marriage has survived the ravages of time, 32 years, mostly because we have had an "open" relationship since 1985.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    I would say sex plays a huge role in the increase of divorce rates in developed countries. -Failing marriages generally have failing sex lives -Viagra, marriage counselling, porn, prostitution - are all on the rise. So evidently we are treating the problem ourselves without fixing the underlying reasons.You also have to take into other factors - such as, -How easy it is to get divorced -Social acceptance of getting a divorce -People becoming more independent (in particular women) -etc

  • Mr_MrsAraps

    Mr_MrsAraps

    11 years ago

    That's assuming both parties want to actively duscuss, improve and keep working at aspects of the marriage and I am glad you have that. When it is not two sided .... That's when either self compromises or hard choices have to be made as everyone has their own tipping point eventually.- Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Divorce rates are actually in decline, from their peak in 1976 after the passing of the Family Law Act the year before. If you believe that divorce around you is on the increase, it's likely because divorce after 20 years or more has risen..... which puts those people into chevtreks general age class... I would still say 40% is something of concern. ... or in the class of his dates' parents ;-) lol- Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Quoting 'Cheekyarses' Would there be less divorces if more married couples opened up their marriage?? Just a thought x Not sure about that... my stat will go to the negative for the idea... ask at the next meet and greet and I'll tell you how

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    That is just what you think, Right? Quoting 'Jay_Me' Most people I know are divorced, thinking about divorce, thinking about separating, separated, or just unhappily in their marriage. Forget the old days when couples hung in forever, they're gone.Its the sign of the times. These days where so many couples are splitting ' no one is any longer the odd person out . Its much easier and much more accepted that separations will happen. and so they do.Not saying all are like that. Im sure there are the survivors that tolerate anything and everything .. Good for them...Today will be old tomorrowMado, Tara xxSo true, today will be old tomorrow. I wish I was wrong with what I posted and yes' thats just what I think because of what I'm witnessing.. does'nt mean Im right , like I said, I wish I was wrong.. Cheers Jay xx

  • RHP

    RHP User

    11 years ago

    Quoting 'Araps' That's assuming both parties want to actively duscuss, improve and keep working at aspects of the marriage and I am glad you have that. When it is not two sided .... That's when either self compromises or hard choices have to be made as everyone has their own tipping point eventually.- Posted from rhpmobile After a busy day, my mind is a bit tired right now Araps and I'm not sure exactly which part of which post you're replying to. :-) I do recognise and agree with what you have to say here anyhow.