RHP

RHP User

F72

the barter

March 20 2015

fun

So lets see what we can do for each other in a barter system. No sex Males for womenWomen for men or what ever floats you boat I would barter a photo shoot, and profile write up for A guy giving me a full body massage and I mean a qualified one with no sex, and the happy ending is me getting out the door, without the other happy ending. So what is it that you would like and what can you give in exchange? I am sure there are a few handy men that would like a home cooked meal , or those pants taken up at the hem? Just have some fun with it.

Comments

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I would be happy to do someones garden for a meal and pleasant company

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    .... I'd kill for a shoulder neck massage ... tight as .... trade a tantric massage .... or plumbing ?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Of a handy person....don't know what I could barter....maybe some meditation sessions,relaxation techniques etc..Or I could take you shopping if you are in need of a new wardrobe..or interior decorating..if your house is boring xxFreya

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    $&%*^(^$ Ikea bookcase together or servicing my car I would offer a: Home cooked meal or twoA massage ( I too am a qualified masseuse) without the happy ending (or maybe)Guitar lessonsDance lessonsTarot reading.. or a heavily discounted funeral (yup, there's a story there)

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Yes I'm offering if you live close enough. I'd settle for food

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I would take that deal if you lived closer, but based on the amount of work my front and back gardens need, I'd be feeding you for a month 😉 - Posted from rhpmobile

  • Single_Guy4U

    Single_Guy4U

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'Twinkes' $&%*^(^$ Ikea bookcase together or servicing my car I would offer a: Home cooked meal or twoA massage ( I too am a qualified masseuse) without the happy ending (or maybe)Guitar lessonsDance lessonsTarot reading.. or a heavily discounted funeral (yup, there's a story there) Ahh, I am reasonable at putting Ikea together. Unfortunately you are too far away otherwise would be happy to swap for a dinner or massage (haven't had one for years), also not bad at home maintenance and repairs, not a bad listener either and would swap for a meal and drink.

  • eviltwin

    eviltwin

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'Twinkes' $&%*^(^$ Ikea bookcase together Happy to help out NSA... looks like you have plenty of offers though. E.

  • Missb4u

    Missb4u

    10 years ago

    Barter an afternoon of beer and footy (I have foxtell) and my amazing company, can throw in a roast dinner if that sweetens the deal in trade for someone to mow my lawn every two weeks (it's a big yard) would also be interested in bartering for housework and dog grooming.

  • Single_Guy4U

    Single_Guy4U

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'Missb72' Barter an afternoon of beer and footy (I have foxtell) and my amazing company, can throw in a roast dinner if that sweetens the deal in trade for someone to mow my lawn every two weeks (it's a big yard) would also be interested in bartering for housework and dog grooming. If you were closer I would love to barter. I am sure you should get plenty of takers, what an offer

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'Twinkes' $&%*^(^$ Ikea bookcase together or servicing my car I would offer a: Home cooked meal or twoA massage ( I too am a qualified masseuse) without the happy ending (or maybe)Guitar lessonsDance lessonsTarot reading.. or a heavily discounted funeral (yup, there's a story there) I'm an A-grade master at assembling Ikea furniture, just don't try and help or I will stab you with the allen key. I would definitely swap that for the massage.

  • Single_Guy4U

    Single_Guy4U

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'Twinkes' or a heavily discounted funeral (yup, there's a story there) Are you planning on working them to death

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Ikea ..... a great barter commodity ..... its like Twister with more swear words ... yep I can help with this

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Area, totally handy type, yard, repair, maintenance, building, trade for qualified massage, waxing, book keeping and high school maths, science tutoring.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'Twinkes' $&%*^(^$ Ikea bookcase together or servicing my car I would offer a: Home cooked meal or twoA massage ( I too am a qualified masseuse) without the happy ending (or maybe)Guitar lessonsDance lessonsTarot reading.. or a heavily discounted funeral (yup, there's a story there) so it might be worth getting in quick ;-) As long as the bookcase wasn't bigger than one of those Ikea 5x5 Expedits, I'd knock that and the car service over in exchange for a home-cooked meal, if it included a dessert (that's not a metaphor - I really like dessert).

  • 6exxy

    6exxy

    10 years ago

    I'll come 1)vacuum, dust, clean 2) set up up your surround system/stereo 3) organise your outdoor area... For WHY ?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Keeps these forums moving along. IT services. clean up the PC, virus checks etc. got that weird thing that keeps popping up (pun intended!) on the screen? Will even check all those nasty photos you have on there.. that may be payment enough Thats all i have to offer apart from my sparkling repartee :-) Offer me something - let see what interesting things are on offer. Mr PJ

  • AnnieWhichway

    AnnieWhichway

    10 years ago

    Handyman stuff For 1 day. Nice meal and a few yarns In the evening. Next day we go shopping for some wardrobe items.perhaps a few wines and some heart to hearts. Perfect weekend.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    You are on ..deal xxFreya

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Lovinit's dungeon is just around the corner..how handy is that😝xxFreya

  • AnnieWhichway

    AnnieWhichway

    10 years ago

    I'll just slip over to your place quietly. Our secret. If she finds me at your place........

  • Lovinit28andKC72

    Lovinit28andKC72

    10 years ago

    You'll be in my dungeon.... I have nothing to barter..... Oh ok I am pretty handy with rope, so is there anyone that needs someone oops I mean something tied up, I'm your girl....and apparently I'm a funny fucker, so I will make you smile too, now that is priceless....💋

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    the "Allen Key" is NOT an Allen key!It maybe a sidchrome key, or a kingcraft key. or any other manufacturer's key.The "Allen Manufacturing Company" of Hartford Connecticut registered the name "Allen" around 1910.They did a pure act of genius inventing the Hexagonal socket head fastener. (Screws bolts etc)There were ALREADY square socket head fasteners around, but were deemed unsatisfactory.. POSSIBLY due to patents pending.The Tapered head Haxagonal socket screws were almost an immediate hit with machine shops etc, who had had many industrial accidents with workers clothing and hair getting pulled into the equipment. Having no protruding bolt head meant less chance of entanglement."Allen" obviously ALSO made the associated tooling to use ON the fasteners, but, to THIS day, even though Allen is owned by another named company, they have NEVER wanted their "Hex wrench" "Hex key" or "Hex tools" to be refered to as "Allen Keys"This is as incorrect as calling --EVERY lawn mower, a "Victor"Every vacuum cleaner a "Hoover"Every sewing machine a "Singer".Just saying you know.... AND Lady T.... I didn't even change anyone a "Barter" for that...

  • AnnieWhichway

    AnnieWhichway

    10 years ago

    Words smiling & Lovint's basement in the one sentence. Doesnt have a ring to it. Although i am tipping my ring might be under a bit duress. Invite your mate Willowtree over and we could have a strappathon .....

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'cavey50'They did a pure act of genius inventing the Hexagonal socket head fastener. (Screws bolts etc)There were ALREADY square socket head fasteners around, but were deemed unsatisfactory.. POSSIBLY due to patents pending. the Robertson head is far superior to the hex, but Robertson got screwed over (oh so punny) when he started production and then refused to licence the design to other manufacturers so supply was poor. Pity, they're much nicer to use - no rounding and a better lock from tool to socket/head. They're pretty common in Canada

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I keep on thinking how much more interesting would the Alien key be...But first we would need to identify the portal 😉xxFreya

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I really like a clean car but just can't find the time to devote to it. Automatic car washes are so impersonal, so I'd like someone to wash my car. I'm not interested in collecting notches on my garage-post, so I'm looking for a bit more of an ongoing regular arrangement, however if you are part of a cheerleader squad, netball or basketball team you are welcome to bring them all along..As the barter, I am happy to supply a suitable outfit(s) to wear.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    .... yes you do ... Dungeon hire .... where the meal comes to you!

  • compressor

    compressor

    10 years ago

    I would be happy to give a lady an all over massage and nothing in return

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I too can offer the motorbike tour, the intelligent dinner conversation and witty repartee( but I do that last bit best after2 or 3 drinks ). And I can cook. BUT, I can do it professionally....including dinner parties and the like.After all, it's my job.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    The Mind BOGGLES at the thought eh?? *smiles*

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    yep.. that was the name of it.. the square socket head makes much more sense to me... like old sump plugs and stuff.. AND taper head screws

  • Lovinit28andKC72

    Lovinit28andKC72

    10 years ago

    Dungeon dinner party? 😈

  • Lovinit28andKC72

    Lovinit28andKC72

    10 years ago

    Dungeon dinner party? 😈

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    ..... Lovinit's dessert! ....

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'Lovinit28' Dungeon dinner party? 😈 ...It has potential ,but I don't cook well when I'm tied up. Unless I was chained to the kitchen by the ankle, I suppose...but that sounds a lot like Work

  • Rob_Ally

    Rob_Ally

    10 years ago

    to sharpen the mower blades....

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'pjrl2014' Keeps these forums moving along. IT services. clean up the PC, virus checks etc. got that weird thing that keeps popping up (pun intended!) on the screen? Will even check all those nasty photos you have on there.. that may be payment enough Thats all i have to offer apart from my sparkling repartee :-) Offer me something - let see what interesting things are on offer. Mr PJ my girlfriend is having no end of problems we could dress up for you while you did the repairs she has a nurses uniform and check your pulse if something pops up as for me, well I can bring my carrot cake

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'compressor' I would be happy to give a lady an all over massage and nothing in return to far from me ...sigh

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Funny you should say that, as i gave my girlfriend the number of my lawn mowing guy he is very cute but I keep my respectable house wife thing around him so he goes to do the lawn at her house, and she says fuck that is hot I wanted to bonk him I then said to him next time he came over, my friend thought you were very hot and had um some thoughts about you I said , she is a very naughty girl she likes all the dress up stuff he looks me in the face and goes...shit yeah I will do her then as he is leaving he turns and looks at me, and says how do you know she is a bad girl? I just smiled. Lawn mowing guys and tradie guys, must get hit on a lot.

  • De0cypher

    De0cypher

    10 years ago

    Someone to give me encouragement, tips and inspiration to paint (canvasses not houses/furniture/cars etc), perhaps a few hours a week. Willing to:- Instruct about anything Indian (cooking/language/culture/dancing etc)- Help with writing (articles, blogs, short stories)- Lifestyle management (organising travel/holidays, events, functions, calendar management, reservations, ticket bookings, archiving, data entry, word processing, filing, scanning, cataloguing, creating flyers/brochures, uploading/editing of documents/photographs/graphics, basic website creation/management, itinerary management, research) For the same amount of hours.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    i would be you sexy toy if would be my teacher

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Any beauty therapy services (qualified) including waxing (XXX trained), electrolysis (permanant hair removal), nails (including acrylic and shellac), facials (yeah, not that kind), eyelash/brow tinting, massage and lash extensions or event make-up (yes, I can airbrush). Will trade for mechanic skills, car servicing, guitar lessons, seamtress skills or for a good cause or great person. ~KK x

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Well I could offer many trade/handyman skills for mmmmmmm? Not sure what I would like. Need to do some thinking. I did help a female friend our just recently. I installed her tv as she was dressed in a sexy little skirt and low cut top. I had my nail bag on in a singlet. Then we had a few drinks and I left. I got her to plug the dvd player and the view was amazing lol. It was a blast. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I am happy to offer a session of breakthrough for your best personal/business growth, or a hypnosis session for smoking cessation. which will propel you to your next level.Offers gladly accepted.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I would swap plumbing work for anything! Well almost anything. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    i can service all cars/save you a fortune on car parts. e.g a $1300 subaru major 100,000km service i can do for about $300 worth of parts. a standard $200 basic service can be done for about $50 worth of fluids. ignore my location, i'm in melbourne and sydney at the moment. i am willing to trade this for... i have no idea. what's on offer?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    just a side track i wonder how many people that claim to be "massage therapists" here, lol. I am also a ex massage therapist that gives a mean full body massage, but my exchange is a smile and dazed look on a womens face after a massage, with or without the extras. I like to know i have done a good job.

  • Funafterfifty

    Funafterfifty

    10 years ago

    By qualified painter, for pc tech help. Desperately require someone who knows computers to get rid of the bugs and slugs and generally tidy up and re configure my shitbox desktop.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    would exchange car servicing car cleaning and detailing lawm mowing for home cooked meal massage with or with out happy ending

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I suffer from severe LOCS(lack of computer skills), my laptop won't download off the net plus other minor issues. Will bring beer/wine and charm you with my endless wit and hilarity, or swap for a NON SEXUAL massage.

  • Markov77

    Markov77

    10 years ago

    I have been renowned for my IKEA fabrications in my circle of friends for many years.... One New Years eve a friend gave me their house keys so I could put together all their furniture before new years eve party began lol. Hmm trade.... A massage - well that would never go astray, Tarot reading- never done one but interested, Guitar lessons - have been dabbling for years and looks like I will continue to dabble hahah. - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Quoting 'unicorn99' I suffer from severe LOCS(lack of computer skills), my laptop won't download off the net plus other minor issues. Will bring beer/wine and charm you with my endless wit and hilarity, or swap for a NON SEXUAL massage. I'm not tooo bad on the computer...might be able to help out in exchange for a lift home from the airport....see what I did there ;) Next time you're about bring it over and let me have a look at it.

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    some basic bookkeeping training (experienced in not-for-profit, hospitality, retail, trades, corporate) - help you to help yourself and save some money. Would be more than happy to swap for a non-sexual massage from a qualified therapist (or Osteopath) - issues with my shoulders and neck - spend too long on computers each day!! Shaz

  • HappyCbrCouple

    HappyCbrCouple

    10 years ago

    We just purchased a house in need of some major renovations... Looking for... Tiler, Plasterer, Plumber, Electrician Willing to barter... Dinner for you and your partner, computer training, tactical firearms training (actually, better not), Umm... Language lessons (7 to choose from), or a cup of tea and a biscuit :)

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Love this forum, but it got me thinking about what non sexual item I have to offer. Apart from a home cooked meal I'm stumped. As for what I need.....Apart from servicing my car I pretty much do things myself. Damn........not much to offer. Lol - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Lol just realised personal training sessions are what I need. Get fit and lose some......not all of my curves. In exchange for? ...........still no idea - Posted from rhpmobile

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Shame you live so far away I would have taken your offer (I would be happy to do someones garden for a meal and pleasant company) Cheers L

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    I'm basically a handy man with many talents for building or fixing. In return a simple coffee and honest chat :))

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Just wondering if anyone has actually used this post to make use of the said swap

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Nope, not even a "like" ! I think people have trouble negotiating or trusting barter. Cash is king because everybody understands the value. Lots of barter systems have been tried, anyone remember "LETS" (local exchange trading system) ?

  • RHP

    RHP User

    10 years ago

    Yeah I remember LETS was tempted to get involved when I was in my early teens, it had only just begun and there were so few listed that it didn't even fill an A4 sheet in my town. True the dollar has certainly quelled the old systems and the idea of trust in a persons word or coming through with said swap is almost gone except in many rural communities..

  • 69kinetic

    69kinetic

    8 years ago

    I would love to many of your ideas and many more? And I believe we met a week ago today at a Certain place 😋

  • seaadventure

    seaadventure

    8 years ago

    I would take you snorkelling and beach walking being rewarded with giving to another