F59
Would you want to know if you are a lousy lay
February 14 2014
Comments
-
RHP User
11 years ago
That was ages ago!! If you don't hear from someone with in a few days after having sex. They ain't interested, so why would he expect a positive response from you? I reckon he was a dud root and he knows it but be is feeling very horny at the moment so he is trying his luck.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
If I was asked directly.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
If you tell me I'm a lousy lay does it lead to more practise? - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' That was ages ago!! If you don't hear from someone with in a few days after having sex. They ain't interested, so why would he expect a positive response from you? I reckon he was a dud root and he knows it but be is feeling very horny at the moment so he is trying his luck. If he knows he is a dud...does he not care? And yes it was ages ago lol so imagine my surprise at the email!!
-
gazpacho
11 years ago
Long Answer: Well, we all have our moments. :p Actually, I can tell you sometimes we're not on our best game or .. ahem... up for it. Happens to everyone. It's a busy life in the modern world. It's not like we are just sitting around with our doodles in the dirt eating fresh mango and waiting for the ladies to come on heat like a bull in a paddock... Sure some of us are probably just headed for the slaughter house.. but ffs give me a second chance! I didn't now it was an exam! You know what? Well bugger off. So you didn't like the way I leant on your long flowing hair when I fell against the pillow... it's not my fault.. I slipped... you know you could have moved. Oh bugger it. NEXT> HugsGazpacho Short answer... No.
-
Mr_MrsAraps
11 years ago
As a guy I would want to know if I was crap or could do something better. As for if they should be told ..... If you were considering a relationship with the person then by all means take charge of your own sexual enjoyment and tell him what he is doing wrong and how you like it. To a point though, if a guy cared about it being good for you then okay but if was totally up himself and only in it for his pleasure then ditch the MF. If its not a relationship I wouldn't go out of my way to say anything. Hey it works for ignoring the 'wan 2 root' messages !
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Be upfront, if they don't appreciate it in the moment they will down the track, Good year that 1 as well, go the Gen X
-
madotara69
11 years ago
You are talking of the meeting for a root with a random guy, so really there is nothing in common as you don't know each other. Chances for a root to be of any real shizam, slim at best. Fucking only really becomes great when there is communication between both involved, that way one or the other can comfortably guide the way, if the guy is going ahead full steam and you Eg, let it fly, he may think you are just fine, perhaps out of courtesy leading him to believe you are enjoying the sex, it happens. Got to say, and not for any offence to be taken please, but you need to place yourself as part to it all. Speak up or take him by the hand, or leave it where it is and look more to what the next guy speaks to you of when messaging. Ask him about the ways he enjoys sex, see if he speaks of patience and you. Mado Tara xx
-
RHP User
11 years ago
If it wasn't just a random ONS and you had seen each other a few times but not had sex, then once you do the woman voices her " dissatisfaction" very gently of course, would you just say "next " and move on or would you like to know and maybe make improvements? And Gaz, you darling, I cant imagine you having a bad day in your life
-
RHP User
11 years ago
... unless we're talking about a completely delusional individual, we blokes know when we've performed badly. Whether or not we actually care is another matter.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
JJ your current situation is the ideal for some gentle constructive criticism - nothing to lose. Get it all out in full detail in the first message ? I think most would like to know quietly and in a non derogatory manner - I certainly would (but I reserve the right sook OK ) ... Being outed on a forum or made fun of would only ever result in an ego defending response and probably degenerate quickly into spiteful discourse and anger? Why not take the opportunity to educate the man and offer to help make him a better lover if he accepts the feedback as constructively motivated ?
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Has different likes and dislikes... It takes a bit of time to understand what each woman likes/wants... My first gf after marriage was explosive and powerful... My second gf reacted totally different in every way to the same stimulus... But she saw enough in me to declare me "trainable" that is a quote folks... 😄 I read a forum early in my time here, it said..."when you are with me, forget everything that every other woman in your life liked, learn to please me..." This is my desire... I can figure some stuff out for myself, but nothing beats being "educated" Of course some people are immune to training... Hp xo 💌 Because you're worth it... - Posted from rhpmobile
-
madotara69
11 years ago
Jay Jay, I would want to know if you were enjoying it all from go to dot. For me sex is not even interesting unless Tara is enjoying it, any others that join us we both feel the same, so yes I would prefer to know if the playmate was having a good old time. It is just natural to hop on and bang like a dunny door, without good time experience, which again takes all involved to teach each other. Easy to read all the wonderful reflections from lonely guys, but realistically if they were as crash hot they proclaim then they would not be here so troubled to find sexual partners, they would be out there playing the game, as you know word of mouth travels faster than the speed of light amongst the ladies and their secret business. Dunno, you do, do you think the guy was caring enough to take your thoughts and work with you? Because you won't know if he does not hear you, but he may turn out to give you a bang out of life. In my honest opinion most men really do want you to enjoy the sex, it's what gives men the..... well fuck we can walk around with a smile on our face and feel king for the day. Without you ladies going off the deep end, not much more than what a bowl of porridge will bring for the day. Tara tells me what she does and doesn't like, never am I offended as I ask of it.
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
I have told someone the sex was shit, when I was pissed off with them. Why not? I had to tell them the truth one way or another. Oh well the next person they are with, might think they are the best root ever! *coughs* *POUND POUND POUND is all I can say* Maybe Jay Jay he thought he was a "Tom Kat"?? Pass the bucket... Foxy
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
MEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW! Love the new profile Pic! Did you take that Mado?? Foxy
-
RHP User
11 years ago
He be well aware he wasn't satisfying you? Surely the way you responded to his jack hammering rooting style would have sent a clear message. Of course if there is no communication between you he won't know at all. If you think men are mind readers you are kidding yourself. We are simply creatures of habit. If his last two partners liked a good hard jack hammering, chances are he probably thinks everyone likes it. Simple really, tell him while he is doing you & if that doesn't work he is indeed a dud! Not a dud root, just a dud! If you dont tell him at the time......don't bother telling him at all! - Posted from rhpmobile
-
madotara69
11 years ago
Foxy, snuck up and caught her peaking at Blindmans arse pic, he he
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Good on you for asking foxxy... I thought that was mados arse... I was going to send him a message asking what he was doing on Saturday night... 😈😈😄😎 Hp xo 💌 Because you're worth it...
-
sweetgem
11 years ago
Since he has come back asking you for sex again, I say do tell! It's the best time for you to voice how you feel after the last time, and why you're not interested anymore. It's simply the truth of your rejection to him, and whether he can take it or not, not your problem! :-) - Posted from rhpmobile
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
You look beautiful....stunning new Pic! It's gorgeous. Foxy xx
-
madotara69
11 years ago
Bahahahahaha Hunting deer, well taking a photo is as good to pulling a trigger.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I've learnt through many experiences.
-
madotara69
11 years ago
Is talking of seasoned players Fun, but probably best you made an appearance just the same, better off for all in the long run.
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
I thought that was Mado's arss first up too..LOL Had to look twice! I thought what the heck!! Did he loose his marbles or somefink and trying to find them? Foxy PS- Mado you knows I lub ya. xxx
-
Mr_MrsAraps
11 years ago
Quoting 'Highpriority' Good on you for asking foxxy... I thought that was mados arse... I was going to send him a message asking what he was doing on Saturday night... 😈😈😄😎 Hp xo 💌 Because you're worth it... Very funny :-). Did you get a date at all.....?? lol
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Oh dear, send the poor little bunny my way and I will give him some tips on the art of the slap and tickle, and send him home with a few carrots. But seriously the problem with bad sex is always entirely two peoples fault, yours and his. The reason is so simply a lack of communication. If a women did not tell me if I was not doing something right, well then I would be asking. If I feel that the woman was not on fire for me then I never hesitate to say so. If you are at the stage of merging and becoming one then you should be at the stage where the ability to communicate is free and effortless. If a lady would tell me later that I was no good in bed, well IF I was not in a coma, I would have to roll my eyes and look back to say "Guess that makes two of us." oh well at least we wont have to do that again. I have to wonder JayJay while the bunny was racing full speed on you, what pray tell were you doing to let him run his race to the end. Did you consider tapping him on the shoulder and ask him maybe to slow down a bit or was it the race between the rabbit and the star fish. Sorry dont mean to insult you as I was not there but I mean WTF it just does not make sense? I for one would put a stop to a lousy root way before the pants came off. People can't read minds you know.
-
sweetgem
11 years ago
For your compliment, really appreciate it :-) This pic was taken in December 2013 when I attended a fine dining at The Rocks. It was my attempted Christmas theme, hence the multiple colours worn :-) - Posted from rhpmobile
-
Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
If someone thought I needed improvement.... .... Id have far more respect for them (and desire) if they showed me.... than whinged about me needing improvement. Its called empathy. IF someone was giving me oral and I prefer them to do ABC versus the XYZ they were doing.... I'll tell them.THis makes BOTH of us better... for eachother.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Okay. Not all men are like you.... LOTS OF MEN DON'T FUCKING LISTEN TO THE WORDS!!!!!! And sometimes it gets tiresome and I resent that I have to get to a point where I feel I have to be aggressive or rude. So I have also in the past let them carry on and then shoved them out the door hopefully never to be hear from them again. And they know it was shit sex because they were being selfish pricks and because they don't contact you for a few weeks or in JayJay's case a few months. I just ignore them. They are only trying their luck because they are horny and there is no one else around. Tough shit mate... you decided it was going to be a one night stand and made no effort in the bedroom so you can just fuck right off now. JayJay, maybe we should start telling men that their selfish behaviour in the bedroom is not good enough. Tell him how you tried to slow him down, that you asked him to slow down, take it easy, etc, etc and he just ignored you so you did not have a good time, and you never want to repeat it again. Unfortunately, you may get the response, and all women have had it, "well you just think yourself lucky because you are a fat slut and who would want you anyway" type of response. And then men wonder why sometimes you just don't have the strength or can't be bothered saying anything. GRRRRR...........
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' If someone thought I needed improvement.... .... Id have far more respect for them (and desire) if they showed me.... than whinged about me needing improvement. Its called empathy. IF someone was giving me oral and I prefer them to do ABC versus the XYZ they were doing.... I'll tell them.THis makes BOTH of us better... for eachother. I am sorry DG... but that doesn't always work because for some reason men don't listen to the words coming out of your mouth! Some men are bad in bed, some men do not know that there is different types of sex and different speeds. They have no clue. AND not all men take to that kindly either. Sick of people always assuming that the woman is at fault.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I started a thread a few years ago, asking if in the middle of sex you realise that you made a mistake, or it's just not happening for you, or they are awful in bed and not listening to you..... is it okay to stop them and say, "you know what, this is happening for me and I want to Leave" start putting your clothes on and walk out. Is that acceptable? From memory, most women said they couldn't do that. They just let the guy finish then never see them again.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meander'If I was asked directly. Of course my opinion is only that, and completely subjective. Like Foxy said, the next person they are with might think they are the best root ever!
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Some acting skills come in handy at times. LMAO!
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' is it okay to stop them and say, "you know what, this is happening for me and I want to Leave" start putting your clothes on and walk out. Is that acceptable? I think I would if I was at someone else's house I would, but not at mine. Kicking someone out halfway through would be bad form I think. Luckily I one had truly terrible experience in bed in the last ten years. (This guy was so nice I didn't have the heart to tell him and faked my way through it. My bad.) Though there was that one paramedic who complained about having to wear a condom and I asked him to leave. But that was different, that was about my safety.
-
gazpacho
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' If someone thought I needed improvement.... .... Id have far more respect for them (and desire) if they showed me.... than whinged about me needing improvement. Its called empathy. IF someone was giving me oral and I prefer them to do ABC versus the XYZ they were doing.... I'll tell them.THis makes BOTH of us better... for eachother. Yep, nobody likes a whinging beaatch! As we all have our own intricacies regarding stimulation, and because these can change in the moment, I like a little communication. It's true that I think a guy can tell if something isn't working out.. and it's an interesting process trying to work out where the magic button is this time, but then of course, there are those starfish from whom, no matter what you do, you get no externally expressed emotional response, and no communication, and also no body language signals, and these lovers get all upset and haughty when you stop, get up and walk away.... lmfao. NEXT. HugsGazpacho
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Okay. Not all men are like you.... LOTS OF MEN DON'T FUCKING LISTEN TO THE WORDS!!!!!! And sometimes it gets tiresome and I resent that I have to get to a point where I feel I have to be aggressive or rude. So I have also in the past let them carry on and then shoved them out the door hopefully never to be hear from them again. And they know it was shit sex because they were being selfish pricks and because they don't contact you for a few weeks or in JayJay's case a few months. I just ignore them. They are only trying their luck because they are horny and there is no one else around. Tough shit mate... you decided it was going to be a one night stand and made no effort in the bedroom so you can just fuck right off now. JayJay, maybe we should start telling men that their selfish behaviour in the bedroom is not good enough. Tell him how you tried to slow him down, that you asked him to slow down, take it easy, etc, etc and he just ignored you so you did not have a good time, and you never want to repeat it again. Unfortunately, you may get the response, and all women have had it, "well you just think yourself lucky because you are a fat slut and who would want you anyway" type of response. And then men wonder why sometimes you just don't have the strength or can't be bothered saying anything. GRRRRR........... We on the forums - both men and women - often fall into that trap of assuming that all other people out there in the jungle think and make decisions as we do. They don't.
-
MissSarahCurious
11 years ago
I remember reading over and over how to 'guide' guys who aren't doing what I want by showing them what I do want. And never encouraging things you don't want to happen again. Haha. Although I was one of the girls who has stopped someone who wasn't listening to my guidance and advised him it wasn't working for me and that we should just give it a miss. I say it rudely and he didn't argue at all. If you don't want to see someone again, why does it matter what he thinks of you? xx Sarah
-
MissSarahCurious
11 years ago
'I didn't say it rudely'
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Honestly? I think it's because we are brought up not to be rude and to be polite so it often is hard to speak up sometimes when you think you may hurt the other person. And yes I realise that isn't the best strategy.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
back to the original question , if I was the OP I would reply something like this. "thanx for your email but I am afraid i am looking for a man who will do the following (OP this is where you insert your desires)... so instead of calling him a dud lay tell him what you expect/like. Then it is up to him to to deliver the goods knowing what they are, or time for him to fuck off.CheersDurty
-
RHP User
11 years ago
everyone is different.....so while one guy may take it as constructive criticism and want to improve....another may think you are rude and have no idea of what good sex is!!!I just want to point out again also....I,m not wanting to rehash the old thread, it was all said on there already with some great opinions and thoughts......this time I was just simply wanting to know how the men out there would react if told they were not the greatest in bed
-
RHP User
11 years ago
When is it polite to say to a woman that she's a crap root? While I'm sure that all the ladies on this site are potential Olympic medallists I think most guys have had the experience that, on occasions, a rolled up pair of work socks might have been a better time. The answer is we don't say anything. Partly because we are led to believe we should display gratitude for being allowed a bounce on the triangular trampoline and partly because IT'S JUST FUCKING RUDE!
-
RHP User
11 years ago
If it was a one off and then with a hopeful smile I asked "Please miss, can I have some more?" and was told "No, you didn't finish the last meal, you made a mess, and you have no table manners?" I would take it in my stride, adjust my shoulders down a bit and and try and work out how I had fucked up. The thing is that every guy believes that they are the best thing since sliced bread in the bedroom and that to repute that fact is tantamount to a personal insult. Some people are better than others at receiving insults, irrespective of the fact that it is intended as one. I am a grown and mature man and take insults very well, with good humor, and without argument. Well that is on the outside for on the inside there is something else going on, but I do try to learn. I would say there is a window of opportunity during which one can voice the deficiency of the fuck and in the OP's case that window is well and truly closed. Also if you are to inform someone in regards to something that they don't do well be a supportive adviser, be ready to explain, receive questions, and educate. There is no point in telling someone that they are lousy if that is all you wish to do, for then it is just an insult.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
is another's sex god...there are so many variables, likes, and dislikes. What works with one may well not work with another.I would rather take the time to find that winning combination through communication..Just my 2c CheersJAB
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I spent an amazing night with a man a few weeks ago. He stayed the night and the next morning he was instantly ready to go again. I guess it was more jack rabbiting than anything else. I did send him a message later to say that the morning wasn't great but that I do like to be woken up slowly, and that I knew it was my fault as I should have said something at the time. Anyway, if you do read this, I'm back from holiday ..............
-
Mr_MrsAraps
11 years ago
Isn't it a two way street to a fair degree for it to get to that point though ..... Depends on how it was delivered and how its was received. There will be people who take it the wrong way and get offended no matter how constructive or tactful its delivered.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I think regardless of how someone may react they should know. If they didn't read the signs at the time, didn't listen or weren't told or given any indication, whatever... it happened. (It may have also been his first root in 6 months and needed to get the dirty water of his chest, still no excuse). I can't imagine that he really enjoyed just being the "jack rabbit" either. Even a long slow wank is better than quick jack. For me, I would want to know. If I left someone unsatisfied, particularly if I came back and asked to play again, I would like to be told no and why. I think it goes both ways: if a bloke had an experience he'd rather not repeat, then he should say so. That said, it is far better to say so at the time. A couple of examples: I love having my nipples sucked, but cant handle having them bitten..... know heaps of guys who love having them chewed on; when it comes to oral - no teeth either, yet have had discussions with mates who like a little teeth and have been with a couple of guys who want it bitten (I'm not even comfortable doing that when asked); my balls, licked and gentle play please, not pulled and sucked on hard. I say at the time and don't mind being asked or told what pleases my partner. I've had woman who don't want oral at all and haven't wanted much foreplay; those who would prefer to be satisfied without penetration at all; others who have requested anal in preference to vaginal sex and others that if you even suggested anal sex you'd left without your balls..... if it's the first time, then it is very hard to know if we don't say. However, I admit there have been times when I have let it go because I was tired or didn't feel like giving it 100% - for those times, I have to accept my part in it not being "fantastic". Nothing to do with capability, but all to do with communication. I figure we are all teachers and students in this game of life. I say tell him you didn't enjoy and why, at least give him the opportunity to learn from his mistakes. Maybe someone may have done that for the next person you get with. You don't have to go back for round 2, but someone else might be spared your experience. Don't be bitter or nasty about it, but tell it how it is... I 'd want to know.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
In a way it doesnt matter he is or was a lousy lover.On the day of the indulgence of your body part you could have said something....ok you didn't, now the boat is sailed. Forget about him say sorry we are not compatible.However.....after the sex....how would you feel a man says........hmmm your body is sensational still the sex was so so.....arn't we all offended by it, would you have a man back who say that to you, no you wouldnt?Hey Babe the blowjob..... I didnt like at all you could do it better really.This is just a metaphor. In the case of a relationship, because you both want to have sex often and satisfy each other, I would guide my partner and I hope he would do the same with me.But here.....most man are Eintagsfliegen.......a one night stand......so dont bother.There are fantastic lovers and there are not so good once for us....but this goes both ways.For some I am a boring lover and for others I am a sex goddess.Just how it is.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
The irony is that a man can be a great root for one woman and something different for the next. I have slept with two guys that were friends. Not at the same time. Of course they compared notes. One said I was the best root he had the other said I was the worst. Sometimes we just don't say anything as we just hope it gets better. But jack rabbits know exactly what they are doing. They are using you as a free whore. Most guys on here want the short fast bucking filly ride, a tip of the hat and hitching the pants and ride off into the sun set. So it's up to you to slow down the cowboy and even if you have to say, Stop! Then do that. I have pushed a guy off me in mid sex and we had the talk. Only one guy got up and left, as it clearly was not working for him either. A dud root can be a dud root for a range of reasons, one of those reasons is you. He just wanted a funk, god bless his cotton socks , so if you want to say no then tell him why. Or say it was not much good for me last time, but I would like to try again but can you please look after my needs first.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
To borrow the saying one (wo)man's trash is another (wo)man's treasure might help here. I'm not convinced it is a question of dud vs great rather one of compatibility. It's the same with kissing. A good kiss is ALL about the compatibility :) xx - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Women do try to tell men things, often in the heat of the moment they will ignore what comes out of your mouth,and your body language. it's called date rape. Often women are conditioned to not speak up, not only just with sex. I don't think there is a girl or man on the planet that has not taken one for the team. People even marry someone who has this kind of sex. We were told you made the bed you lay in it. Men have said, was that good for you baby? this is after pushing themselves into my very dry vaginal, even with me saying no. That is how I lost my virginity and it was not pleasant. I also let this man do this too me again on several occasions , why . Because back then I was not the wiser woman that I am now. It's a bout power and self awareness. It is not that easy, each of us is different. Some men want to know, some don't in the land if random sex with strangers it's a lucky or Un lucky dip.
-
Missb4u
11 years ago
And that was only because he kept asking why I wouldn't see him again. He actually took it very well but now wants a chance to learn and make it up to me... Not sure about that yet. Personally I would like to know if a guy considered me a lousy lay. Sure my ego would take a hit but I the constructive feedback is more important so I can improve. I would be devastated if I was told my bj's were no good. - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
It's not what you say, it's how you say it. If I'm not hitting the spot, tell me AT THE TIME!!! With the same subtlety and respect that you would expect if the shoe were on the other foot. We're all different so what works with one is the worst for another. This is yet another reason why random one nighters are not for me, getting to know someone at least a little bit about her likes/dislikes is vital for things to go well.
-
madotara69
11 years ago
Some guy and gal got together to have a root camed up, they were in missionary position, he some muscle guy, he just started pumping like a robot, one speed one same action and that was the whole show, normally the crowd cheers and banter runs rampid, great atmosphere if that's what you enjoy with it all, we even played up a couple of times, we enjoyed it with all tuned in, doesn't matter shape colour or effort, if you get in and have a go the chat room folk get right behind you, it's a good thing really, but this guy was that fucking boring, the chat room hardly a peep. The guy hopped off when he was done, the gal just got out of the scene, he was so infatuated with his muscle body, he looked to the cam as though he was a hero. Don't even think it occurred to him that there was no one still interested by then to even say anything, but he still sat there wanking and admiring himself, Don't think he even cared but for his own self. Don't think he would listen or care no matter what anyone said, not hard to pick though, seen plenty like that over the time, don't really have many if any mates either. Just get off on themselves and have this illusion that everyone else does too, because they have some muscles, couldn't lift a bag of cement for that matter. A mate of mine reckons it is the ones whose eyes are real close together, time and time again, just some types he reckons. The self centred ones, not so much how they sexualy perform, but at a good guess, same as the behaviour. Wives tales hey.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
If a guy contacted me a couple of months later...and asked if i was still hot for him and he was a dud root...I tell him. And I have done so in the past. Don't care because he never cared to stay in touch so I would not bother with the training thing...aaaargh who could be bothered? Men 40 to 47 should bloody know how to seduce, entice, tease and satisfy a woman. Go read some literature. I am a dud if he is a dud. I have been told I am a hardcore no holes barred great submissive fuck, but he was an awesome Dominant Master as well, which led to 3 hours of pure erotic lust and a sore throat for 3 weeks from gagging on his huge cock and a sore fanny and a sore ass for 3 days at least. More more more please...unfortunately he lives in Toowoomba damn it!!! You have to match up your libidos and adventurous sides to get great sex with each other.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Agree with everything Meeka said. Some men don't listen or observe the behaviour happening, when youre climbing up the headboard because he is too rough with oral and he doesn't pick up on it, so you say, honey little more gentle and he still doesn't get it .....get the fuck outta my bed.... I wouldn't say that, but yeh some males just don't get it.
-
Seachange
11 years ago
A recent experience with this lovely gent of late 30s made me think of this. After 2 dates which well well, during which he bragged about his wild experiences on both dates, we went to his place as I was curious and he was attractive to me. It was downhill from then. He was fumbling most of the time, gave me condescending comments during the sessions rather than helpful hints what turns him on. in the end it felt like doing sex by numbers and it dampened the mood. I dont think I was too enthusiastic after that. In short, I was bored. I didn't have the heart to tell him as he was such a lovely guy.... Unlike the guy the week previous, he was in his early 50s. he was fit and he was so enthusiastic and relaxed, we enjoyed the whole night and day. I gave him compliments how he really communicated well with what I want and what he wants, and listened and was generous in the all aspect of sex and discovery without being pushy. I told his he was a very good lover.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I think some man watch too many porn that by the end they think they are porn stars,so far in my life I haven't had any bad experiences only for the fact that I love women just got to know how to touch ;) - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
. someone they're a dud root.. There's been a few I wouldn't rate, but I'd never let them know that.. Why should I make them feel bad just because I didn't get off. Sometime things go pear shape and we know we were not always up to scratch ourself ? So why make them feel crap because of our own expectations ? Just move on and find someone who ticks the right boxes and leave well enough alone...
-
On_Safari
11 years ago
I've been in this situation....and yes I apologised and told him I was sorry for allowing it to happen. It was a disservice to us both. It was horrible sex and no I don't want to see you again. He messaged me for another 3wks..... How is someone supposed to improve their level of service (in any arena) if they don't get honest, constructive feedback. I told him what was wrong with his performance, from the moment I walk in the door and him stripping and sitting next to me naked to the poor massage to the pitiful fingering, to the brief shag and altogether "gross" experience. And I'd do it again...... If the shoe was on the other foot I'd like to know since I'm a perfectionist and consider any lucky bastard who gets that far with me walk away sated, masculine in his knowledge that he satisfied me aa completely as I satisfied him. If you can't take the time I'm not going to either......life's roo short for nediocrew, disconnected, mindless and passionless sex.....NEXT!! NB. Have often been told I'm spectacular (shrugs) but I'm only as good as the Man beneath me. 😍 lol
-
RHP User
11 years ago
There are givers, who are solicitous and kind. There are takers who are well, 'Wham Bam Thank You Ma'am' Try, be honest but you may or may not get gratitude or they may just say - so what. The sort of person who believes their mere awesomeness should be enough for you - man or woman - means they will rationalise it away anyway. Every person I have been with I have not made cum. Not everyone who has been with me has made me cum. But I've honestly always tried. A nice lady in her twenties very graciously showed me what to do for her. I've been building on that knowledge every since. Of course, no guarantees. So much happens in the mind and there are so many distractions .
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I think some people are getting upset because they are assuming JJ might be rude or insulting or tell him he was a dud root directly. But if she tells him that he went too fast, not enough foreplay, and that he wasn't listening to her when she asked him to slow down... then that is constructive criticism. He may not like to hear it but maybe it will help him become a better lover in the future. As for the "boat has sailed" comments. Too right it fucken has. What a cheek to get in contact after so many months and say "are you still hot for me". Sorry JJ but what a twat. I think he has started the communication again so it's okay to tell him that you didn't enjoy last time and the reasons why.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Myself .. I would want to know as i too like indagine says .. am a perfectionist in every way possible even with sex lol . As long as it was discussed nicely as in " sexy .. maybe next time you could try doing this , or using this technique because I think you/I may really like it" or even if the guy voices what he likes/dislikes beforehand i think it's perfectly fine .. even down to giving pointers of how to do something better (as long as it's not made in comparison to an ex playmate/gf or whatever .. lol) .. I myself am very direct & will always say what I like/dislike whether the other party gets offended or not though that being said .. I am pretty tactful & gentle about it , or will make a joke or something about something i didn't like especially if we meet up again , as i don't want to be offensive or make them feel bad . I honestly believe through discussing likes/dislikes from the beginning that it leads to very mutually rewarding sex for all involved .. :)
-
RHP User
11 years ago
To be quite honest some times you are gods gift to women ! And sometimes you might as well not show up haha But honestly deep down we all know when we are hot and when we are not .!!! - Posted from rhpmobile
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Nothing has been said about the type of encounter and whether it was one of those very casual things that might or might not be repeated... no expectations of anything more at the end. I have had those and have had a call 6 months later, because ... well I don't know why. Some I've done again and others I've not (for a variety of reasons, not necessarily because the person was a dud). But I have said if I haven't enjoyed it, or if I've gone round two, then I've said what I like and asked what they like the second time around. I figure if I'm going to say what I like, then I should be asking what the other person likes... or at least monitoring their response to me. I have contacted people after a while of not.... I found that often it was better the next time. Let's face it, people don't perform for many reasons and we have all experience it at some point. I just reckon honesty with respect is the way to go, but I am a person who likes to learn from my mistakes ... I don't mind getting something wrong, but I don't want to keep making the same mistakes.... so please tell me if I don't get it right.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I would like to know what I could be doing better, what I should do differently but that is just me. Everyone is different, some guys may not care, some may even take offense.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
sorry ladies i think it works both ways some men are great in bed and some are not the same goes for us ladies i'm not saying i 'm good or bad but i think u need to feel a bit of lust for the guy or lady u are having sex with or what is the point of being there with them .
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'qualitygtd' When is it polite to say to a woman that she's a crap root? While I'm sure that all the ladies on this site are potential Olympic medallists I think most guys have had the experience that, on occasions, a rolled up pair of work socks might have been a better time. The answer is we don't say anything. Partly because we are led to believe we should display gratitude for being allowed a bounce on the triangular trampoline and partly because IT'S JUST FUCKING RUDE! Rude is a guy that will happily accept foreplay but offer none in returnRude is a guy that bangs away at 100 miles an hour as if youre just a blow up dollRude is a guy that continues at that pace even after being asked to slow down a little several times THAT is what is fucking rude!!!
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Sorry, but I have to ask: Is that a coffee enema in your bed?
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
Quoting 'qualitygtd' When is it polite to say to a woman that she's a crap root? While I'm sure that all the ladies on this site are potential Olympic medallists I think most guys have had the experience that, on occasions, a rolled up pair of work socks might have been a better time. The answer is we don't say anything. Partly because we are led to believe we should display gratitude for being allowed a bounce on the triangular trampoline and partly because IT'S JUST FUCKING RUDE! Rude??? I tend to disagree, as there is always room for improvement. You never know unless one is to talk openly and honestly without being rude. How's being assertive sound? True? If I am crap - please tell me so I can work on myself to accept constructive criticism. :) Kind regards, Foxy
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
Crack me up!! Foxy I see it too!! LOL
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
I always make a point of saying "thank you" to all my lovers after wards...why not? Some have been taken back by it, some have said "No one has ever said that to me before" I think it is only polite to say that if I have enjoyed myself and they have as well. If I didn't enjoy myself I would not say that. Foxy
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Sorry, but I have to ask: Is that a coffee enema in your bed? Its a picture of a horse on the bed cover!!
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I did not see that horse. My apologies, hotanhorny, fighting a migraine and leaving now.
-
madotara69
11 years ago
Quoting 'JayJay_66' Quoting 'qualitygtd' When is it polite to say to a woman that she's a crap root? While I'm sure that all the ladies on this site are potential Olympic medallists I think most guys have had the experience that, on occasions, a rolled up pair of work socks might have been a better time. The answer is we don't say anything. Partly because we are led to believe we should display gratitude for being allowed a bounce on the triangular trampoline and partly because IT'S JUST FUCKING RUDE! Rude is a guy that will happily accept foreplay but offer none in returnRude is a guy that bangs away at 100 miles an hour as if youre just a blow up dollRude is a guy that continues at that pace even after being asked to slow down a little several times THAT is what is fucking rude!!! No that's bordering on wrong JayJay, Well it is wrong, if a playmate ignores any thing you say, Golden rule, no means no, stop means stop, slow down became fuck off.Lousy root, would us guys want to know? That's where we are going here, right Jay Jay? I would happily take the being a lousy root, over the idea of standover to women. Not included as part with lousy, a bloke taking advantage of a lady like that, needs to know he should seek help, as he is ill and heading in the wrong direction. If that is what he thinks sex is about, take some time out and get the head straight, it's just a bad frame of mind, nothing that can't be fixed, but it has got to be understood. Mado Mado Tara xx
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Waste of emotional energy thinking about what should have happened... Complaining won't change anything' moving on and finding someone who listens probably will.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Horses for courses... it is all about reading the person you are with... I love a hard, savage fuck where you are both totaly exhausted... but then... it may be followed by three hours of sensual teasing and ... can I say... limit stretching games... yet on the other hand... it can begin with stilted... instruction and a series of orgasms given by the male party to the lady... followed by a wonderful sensual deep and soft series of penetrations and ... oh... perhaps a burst of animal male lust... well I am exhausted now...
-
Lovinit28andKC72
11 years ago
I'd rather know if I was a dud root 👎 and would me happy to know what needed improving 👍..... Not that I think this is ever going to happen......😈
-
RHP User
11 years ago
If I'm not hitting the spot, of course I would want to know. After all, Sex is a 2 way street, ad I'm in it as much for her pleasure as I am for mine. If it's not working for you, let me know. If I fail to pick up on the subtle clues, then get more insistent. No-one is a mind reader. Yes it's fantastic when things just click and the sex is wall shaking and neighbour annoyingly perfect. But sometimes that level takes time to reach. That doesn't detract from the result you achieve. Hell, sometimes it makes it even more impressive! If you're not willing to learn how to please the lady/guy you are with, then you display your selfish and base nature. And no-one wants that shit.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I dunno maybe they should wake me up, then I could ask. Starfish is my speciality Though I do come to life if someone accidentally probes the first hole from the back of my neck. I may have had an orgasm this one time but it could have just been a sneeze. Lady t the saddest shag in the west I am that bad that I never got a shag in an all male prison
-
RHP User
11 years ago
yes jay jay some men can be rude if u don't like what they are doing tell them to stop and if they want you to go down on them they should return the favour thank you foxy i also say thanks after wards if it is good and nothing better if a guy or couples say it back to u it show's everyone has had a good time and yes it is a horse under my bum if any one is interested lol
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
What did you decide to do about this man? Follow up/not follow up?? Tell him/not tell him??? Foxy
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
What did you decide to do about this man? Follow up/not follow up?? Tell him/not tell him??? Foxy
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I slept with a co-worker eons ago and he just JackRabbitted with no foreplay whatsoever. He asked me afterwards if I enjoyed it and I flat out told him no. I told him he had absolutely no consideration for my pleasure (I was very kind about it - not bitchy and mean) and that saddened me that he didn't understand that. He begged me for months afterwards to make it up to me but I refused. I saw him 10 years later and he thanked me, said he always puts his partners needs ahead of his own. He really had no idea of what he was missing out on. But we were great mates for years so I felt comfortable telling him. Not sure I'd bother in your situation.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I maybe on the wrong page with the topic but my thoughts- Sadly a lot of people male and female do not know what they are doing in the bedroom and you do need to let people know to help self-improvement and help them on the journey of life and turn it into a project of practise if you like them. My experience is with females only, and 9 out of 10 say guys don’t know what they are doing.(nor do the women half the time) sorry this is MY experience. Male: issues men blow to quickly – Solution make them have a shower before bedroom fun get the pressure out of the system and give little Rodger a tug. Thus relieving the pressure and in the bedroom he will go for longer. Guy thinks it’s a wham bam thank you situation project ejaculate well no there’s two in the room that want to get off. Males: tend not to go down on female don’t know why I think it’s great. Spill chocolate down there tell them to lick it all off. Before sex happens or no sex will happen that will kill em, And tell them what’s good or not and teach them how to please you. Get them to massage the clit area with the tounge. We are like little kids or dogs teach us show us to please you. Put us in different positions so that it hits different parts of your inside to stimulate more. You don’t know things unless you are told. Both: What happened to touching and holding one another and foreplay. Solution a game called simon says the male or female takes control for the night and tells the other person what to do and show them what pleases you, as its different from person to person. Females: simon says he can tell you how to do blow jobs better and what he likes. In relationships I also find the guys taps the girl for action in the bedroom. Guys have great shoulders why not tap them on the shoulder and make them feel wanted and needed. Both: how simple is a back massage that stimulates and intensifies the tissue area that touch is amplified and more erotic Both: after having sex running the hands over the body of your partner and relaxing the body after the hot fun. Not rolling over and sleeping. Sorry if I have offended or on the wrong page my thoughts and opinions I won’t go on.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Any aspiring Olympic athlete will tell you, everyone is looking for legal ways to improve their individual performance. So with that in mind and considering that hotels want to know how they can improve their service to their guests, I developed an exit survey to improve my chances for Olympic selection! Part A 1. Had significant understanding of the jobStrongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree 2. Was open to suggestions Strongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree3. Worked well under supervision... Strongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree 4. Worked well unsupervised... Strongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree5. Always sought new and innovative techniques... Strongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree 6. Adequate use of imagination Part B these are on a 1-5 scale one being low/ unsatisfactory 5 being multi orgasmic screaming with pleasure, the thought of which results in immediate below the waist tingling feels and afternoon damp patches etc. 1. Oral techniques 2. Manual handling 3. Intercourse 4. Spanking (if applicable) 4.a was spanking firm enough - too firm - not firm enough5. Hair pulling 5a was the ........ you get the idea 6. Orgasms Money back guarantee? Want more cowbell? - What suggestions would you make for future fun? Any further comments? What opportunities exist for future playdates if any (please note this is the follow up question if high scores are received only)
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Always open to well meant instruction as it is difficult to get things right, particularly first time. The better you know someone, the better the sex has been our experience. A little bit of patience and more concern for your partners pleasure than your own will get better results (guys in particular but not solely).
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'AQUA_bumps' Any aspiring Olympic athlete will tell you, everyone is looking for legal ways to improve their individual performance. So with that in mind and considering that hotels want to know how they can improve their service to their guests, I developed an exit survey to improve my chances for Olympic selection! Part A 1. Had significant understanding of the job Strongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree 2. Was open to suggestions Strongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree 3. Worked well under supervision... Strongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree 4. Worked well unsupervised... Strongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree 5. Always sought new and innovative techniques... Strongly disagree / Disagree / Agree / Strongly agree 6. Adequate use of imagination Part B these are on a 1-5 scale one being low/ unsatisfactory 5 being multi orgasmic screaming with pleasure, the thought of which results in immediate below the waist tingling feels and afternoon damp patches etc. 1. Oral techniques 2. Manual handling 3. Intercourse 4. Spanking (if applicable) 4.a was spanking firm enough - too firm - not firm enough 5. Hair pulling 5a was the ........ you get the idea 6. Orgasms Money back guarantee? Want more cowbell? - What suggestions would you make for future fun? Any further comments? What opportunities exist for future playdates if any (please note this is the follow up question if high scores are received only) That is gold. I'll have to develop an appropriate one to hand out to gents in future.
-
Beachlover1999
11 years ago
.......Always ahead of the game and thought provoking!!!! ;))
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I usually email it out that way there is no pressure ...
-
Seachange
11 years ago
Quoting 'bigindapants' I maybe on the wrong page with the topic but my thoughts- Sadly a lot of people male and female do not know what they are doing in the bedroom and you do need to let people know to help self-improvement and help them on the journey of life and turn it into a project of practise if you like them. My experience is with females only, and 9 out of 10 say guys don’t know what they are doing.(nor do the women half the time) sorry this is MY experience. Male: issues men blow to quickly – Solution make them have a shower before bedroom fun get the pressure out of the system and give little Rodger a tug. Thus relieving the pressure and in the bedroom he will go for longer. Guy thinks it’s a wham bam thank you situation project ejaculate well no there’s two in the room that want to get off. Males: tend not to go down on female don’t know why I think it’s great. Spill chocolate down there tell them to lick it all off. Before sex happens or no sex will happen that will kill em, And tell them what’s good or not and teach them how to please you. Get them to massage the clit area with the tounge. We are like little kids or dogs teach us show us to please you. Put us in different positions so that it hits different parts of your inside to stimulate more. You don’t know things unless you are told. Both: What happened to touching and holding one another and foreplay. Solution a game called simon says the male or female takes control for the night and tells the other person what to do and show them what pleases you, as its different from person to person. Females: simon says he can tell you how to do blow jobs better and what he likes. In relationships I also find the guys taps the girl for action in the bedroom. Guys have great shoulders why not tap them on the shoulder and make them feel wanted and needed. Both: how simple is a back massage that stimulates and intensifies the tissue area that touch is amplified and more erotic Both: after having sex running the hands over the body of your partner and relaxing the body after the hot fun. Not rolling over and sleeping. Sorry if I have offended or on the wrong page my thoughts and opinions I won’t go on. Thanks. I like the points you have outlined. both constructive to the issue at hand. I agree on pretty much all occasions. I do ask my partner what they like and if what I was doing does anything for them. if not how can I make it feel better. I also ask what I want and tell them what feels good. I find that most, read most, men above 35yo are more considerate with their partners as they have learnt a lot from previous experience. Hence my preference. But I could easily be proven wrong.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I should have added its not Olympic racing and world records that I want to achieve... its more about getting solid scores ... Imagine there are 5 judges in the room, waiting for your performance to finish so they hold up their score card... that kinda thing...
-
RHP User
11 years ago
I have frequently (not as frequent as I would have liked) spent a whole day in bed with a partner, interspersed with bouts of giggling, food or deep an meaningful conversation (even politics or religion) and only had one or two orgasms... while on some of those occasions the lady in question (depending upon the individual) may have had the joy of 10 or more. I feel most men cannot get off without orgasm... I must say there is nothing better than feeling your partner shudder and scream because of your actions... a big grin appears upon my face... and to me that is a form of orgasm. I have found that you connect sexually with some partners more than others... I am sure it is about how much each party is able to let loose... to relax and fly with the wind.... Do I want to know if I have not done well... I think you always know if it works between two people... or not.
-
RHP User
11 years ago
But I think that judging on simply one performance is a little naive... As a guy, and others will surely agree, there are often times when we don't perform the way we usually do, it could be many factors - fatigue, alcohol, level of interest, the mood and setting...heck maybe the guy had a few morning wanks before getting the lucky date? who knows! To put it simply...ask yourself this: If the best tennis/golf/football player in the world has ONE bad game per season....Does that mean he is a bad player?
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
*shakes head* Sorry what did you post?? I was a little distracted by your profile pic. *wipes drool* Foxy
-
MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
Quoting 'AQUA_bumps' I should have added its not Olympic racing and world records that I want to achieve... its more about getting solid scores ... Imagine there are 5 judges in the room, waiting for your performance to finish so they hold up their score card... that kinda thing... Bum tap for that. bwahhhhhhh Foxy
-
RHP User
11 years ago
No one really needs to rely on others to tell them they are a good fuck or not ? You know if you fucked up .? Gets back to your own self confidence not another's persons opinion. Could be a multiple of things that caused you to not be at your best at any given time. THAT of course unless your out and out lazy.. In that case it goes hand in hand with a bad performance...
-
RHP User
11 years ago
So sexy men of RHP.....would you like to know if a lady considered you to be , not so great in the sack?How would you take this ? Would you be open to listening? Yes... if I suck in the sack tell me... However! make sure you are willing to explain why and what should be done to improve the situation and don't be offended if you are asked back for round 2 to see if things can be remedied... SGCommunity service announcements are good for the soul... gently tell the JR he needs to lift his game if only for the next ladies sake. And AQUA...
-
RHP User
11 years ago
Agree!
-
Beachlover1999
11 years ago
Re Tigeroo - OMG was doing the same and as for Mr Bumps!!! Lolol ;))
Boards
-
Hot Topics
Topics: 14361 Comments: 120840
-
Girls Ask
Topics: 1355 Comments: 14709
-
Guys Ask
Topics: 2425 Comments: 17234
-
Couples' Corner
Topics: 2405 Comments: 12737
-
Swingers Lifestyle
Topics: 794 Comments: 5154
-
Fetish & Fantasy
Topics: 1148 Comments: 6957
-
Hot Travel
Topics: 622 Comments: 2145
-
LGBT
Topics: 156 Comments: 1150
Forum help
-
Something related with that
-
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
-
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
-
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
-
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
Share